i'm pretty fucking done with everything anons, i'm 20 and even though i pass and everything I'm done. I bought some #4 heroin and I plan on doing it with my girlfriend whenever I cani hope i either die by overdosing or that at least i can make a cute video like cuteheroinwish me luck anons
>>44219655
>pass>young>has a girlfriendwhat's the problem exactly?
>>44219750apart from having a chronic neurodegenerative disease that is probably going to make me disabled in a couple of years, it made me fail what I was studying for, and I cannot afford to lose any more years. I've just been depressed since I have memory and even though everyone sees me as a girl, the brainworms are just too much
>>44219655Giwtwm
the only thing that legitimately brings me any joy to this world is my girlfriend and my relatively large online followingi hope I either manage to find peace in the drug or manage to make a video or something that ends up living far longer than i will
jughub
>>44219655Why not try feederism?
>>44220182i dont get any pleasure from eating food, i hate it
>>44220224poor thing
Do drugs really feel that good? Like what’s the difference between doing heroin and eating a bowl of ice cream?
>>44220463Ice cream is not dangerous and life ruiningly addicting. Don't do drugs cutie
>>44219796what is the disease?
>>44220463Even the fucking heroin subreddit is warning people to stay away from it(meanwhile the fucking meth one is advocating for it).>>44220182Genuinely eating yourself to obesity for a fetish is less bad for your health than a heroin habit
>>44220463I haven't done Heroin (yet) but MDMA is fucking amazing. Every single problem, gone. You love the world and the world loves you back. I've experienced the same with LSD.There's drugs and drugs, some feel better, some worse. Probably my top 3 would be MDMA, 2MMC, LSD.Morphine also feels good, but I've only tried oral.I'll report back when I shoot up
>>44220494MS :/
>>44220483Yeah but like imagine you had a really really long day at work and the gym then you went to the ice cream shop. You got a strawberry cone with dark chocolate chips and brownies inside. That feels really good and makes you happy. Do drugs feel better than that?
>>44220504Honestly considering I'm in a pretty small city from Europe, and where there's not an opioid problem (there is a benzo problem though) I don't think I could feed an addiction even if I wanted. I've looked everywhere to buy it locally, and nobody has it.
>>44220520Considering I will never be able to have a job because I'm a trans woman that doesn't even have an uni degree, I don't know. I wish it was that simple. I just want to be a normal fucker and life is just throwing curveballs at me constantly. I'm so fucking done.
>>44220519you aren't necessarily going to end up disabled, is it what the doctors told you? How did your symptoms start and since when?
>>44220520Nothing feels better than that! Apart from sharing that ice cream with a special someone.
>>44220566I got paralyzed neck down, half of my body because of a medullar ischemia, spent a while in the hospital, and there they diagnosed me last year. I am on treatment now, Kesimpta, but I do have a bit of damage. The feeling in my skin has changed, cold feels like I'm being stabbed, I can't even appreciate my girlfriend running her fingers on my skin. I can't have sex. I thankfully recovered from most of the mobility issues, but stuff like bladder stuff is still there. Doctors haven't told me that, but I feel like my future is grim. I have no studies, I have no job. The only thing I really have is my online following and the satisfaction of having helped so many people get on HRT.Being NPD and BPD doesn't help either. I don't know what to do. i feel so hopeless
>>44220520You're adorable
>>44219655Please don't nona.
You should let me use you and make you cheat on your gf and whore you out a bit before i force you into ODThat would be so hot
>>44219655how tall r u
Hey nona please don't do that. If you need opioids for severe (physical) chronic pain that's one thing, but they're really not good to take if you don't need them. The w/ds are so, so bad. If I wasn't under medical supervision for mine and getting a very steady dose (I'm on a prescription patch) I would be terrified constantly of ending up in w/d again.
>>44219655ruin your own life I guess but if you drag your gf into it your a piece of shit
Humble brag. Wish I had some #4 heroin. >>44220504That's because heroin users aren't retards but meth users are.
>>44219796DIY euthanasia? Based. I plan to overdose on ket personally Why bring your gf into this though?
>>44222955You're both fucking retarded, you can't die from overdose on ket and overdosing on opiates oftentimes causes you to throw up and choke on your vomit. It's extremely painful.
>>44219655U will die and end up in a spiraling addiction with a criminal history. Ive been paralyzed and didnt stop. Only recently did after criminal shit and my life is so better please dont retard just smoke weed and pop some benzos or lyrica occasionally
>>44219655seriously dont jump straight to heroine, at least start with some oxy ur literally gonna die
I don’t know if this is irony, 4chan humor or a general call for help. But if it’s a call for help. Don’t do it. It can be tough but wanting to do drugs with the explicit intent to die isn’t what anyone wants for you. :)
>>44220553Hi, The problem is "normal" is just a lie. Like when people say "I will age with dignity". Its not. No one who gets old wants to be old. No one that is dying wants to die. None of us make it out of this motherfucker alive. What we can control is how we react to these unexpected issues. It is all bullshit. I am sorry you can not find a job. However, if you are so inclined. Why not lie about being trans and get the job?and don't give me "oh well I have boobs" excuse. You can act and lie. After struggling to get where I am at job wise. Everything at work is a lie. No one is really your friend. They are not a family. They will not respect you. You have to put that fear into them yourself. If you are done then thats fine. The game ends when you let it run you over despite the obstacles. Source: I am having to hide my identity, my family hates that I cross dress, I have a fake GF at work, I know I make more money than my parents have ever made, and yes I am getting old I will die the way I want and when I want.
>>44223041
>>44222974Fuck you mean I can't overdose on ket. Isn't there a fatal dose or something? Or success rate is low and unreliable? There's people regularly dying from it.
>>44223061 is LYING!
>>44223093No. It can. Sometimes it just feels it won’t. I promise it does, the time between now and then feels long and uncertain but one day you will wake up and everything will be fine :)
>>44223089>>44223089Drinking too much orange juice will kill you too.Its called the LD50 (lethal dose) of which even too much oxygen can and will kill you once you pass the LD50. Or if you know... some cocked out coked out drug dealer mixes the OJ with something else. >>44223099LOL STFU. We will all die eventually even if we are goodie two shoes all the time. Is that when it gets better? Shitting yourself in the bed waiting to die and join your lover?What matters is the good moments we have with others and protect those moments in our hearts and minds.
>>44223115“It gets better don’t overdose on heroin and die before that” immediately definitely translates to be a good two shoes, never have done and die and don’t enjoy life? Got it
>>44223115I can get the lethal dose for my body weight with some to spare, not just taking random amounts of it recreationally. I'd gulp the whole dose right away and maybe even wash it down with alcohol. Why wouldn't it work?
>>44219655I miss heroin. Nothing will ever feel as good. Fuck my pooner life
>>44223189HOW TALL ARE YOU?
>>442231915'8 I was fucked genetically my parents are short
>>44223198androphilic or gynephilic?
>>44223206I'm straight I only like women
>>44223229based pooner
>>44220610>bladder stuffdo you wear diapers?
>>44223115>Is that when it gets better? Shitting yourself in the bed waiting to die and join your lover?nta but it can be. I stopped being chronically suicidal a ways after I started being a wheelchair user. not randomly, but through work and chance. I know a lot of other disabled people in my local community through hiking and my sangha and shit like that too. things can become easier at quite literally any age in and in any condition.
>>44220610Not saying this has to apply to you, but my BPD became subclinical because I got actual trauma therapy vs normal talk therapy, CBT, or even DBT. I used some DBT principles and techniques including a formal meditation practice (something that is very very dependent on the person btw--meditation can worsen some mental health issues). I kept in mind that I could fire therapists who were useless or judgmental. I also worked on my "inner critic" (ie the voice telling me to fucking kill myself all the time, you worthless loser), being aware of it, separating it from myself, defusing it with humor or kindness.I also cut out some people from my life, got the best treatment I could for my physical health issues, and tried to make my environment easier to live in.finding new ways to have sex, get out of the house, trying new meds, physical and occupational therapy, building a medical "team" and finding a home clinic that gave me decent, respectful care were also important. I had to find community so that I could see a good life (or a number of good lives) with disability modeled for me. it is a TERRIBLE idea to rely upon healthy and/or ablebodied people to help you feel life is worth living. most of them will subtly or even unintentionally hint that your life is over, and the ones who don't will still not know how to help you. It's asking to be made to feel worse when you are basically in a fledgling stage and at your most hopeless. I definitely recommend going to a center for independent living near you if you can and trying to find a peer counselor. discussing your life and your problems.
