dunno

I couldn't tell you when. It's not an exact moment but rather a slow process.
Somewhere at the ages 15-16 I started being curious of gay porn. By age 20 I was identifying primarily with the bottom. By age 21 I was envious of my gf. I specifically remember when I truly envied her when she was sucking my dick. I imagined myself as her and came harder than ever. She loved it but I felt ashamed.
I stopped watching straight porn altogether by then.
She left me when I was 22 for a totally unrelated reason. Had one more affair with a woman that felt really weird and just a few weeks before my 23rd birthday I came out as gay.
Went volcel for almost a year. This allowed me to explore myself. Started masturbating anally and slowly realized that it wasn't entirely a random thing that my brain kept on identifying me as a bottom in porn.
My 24th birthday caught me with a bf. He was really sweet and loved the fact that I only wanted to bottom. Trouble is that he was also really shy. I left him soon after starting hrt.
I started hrt before the 25th birthday thinking that this might help. It did help, but not the way I thought. It kicked my "mef" into overdrive. I got into hrt hoping to look cuter and like myself more and a year in I was researching passing tips and SRS.
My second bf was way more appropriate for me sexually and socially, but the trouble is that he was financially irresponsible. Ended up leaving him because I was starting getting knocks on my door from people he owed money to.
I came out as a tranny at 27 and scheduled SRS. got put on an almost 18 months wait list.
Three months before the surgery I met my now husband.
So when did I develop mef? I don't know. Could be any of these moments. It probably really started with the first few sexual encounters with my bf. But mentally it likely started a lot earlier than that.

I had a novel mef experience last night but I can't remember it. I always imagine guys want me but I'm not even fem presenting.

>>44274656
This is a pseudo science term used by terfs lmfao do not self identify by it if u say u do i assume yer psyop terf

>>44275090
>yer a terf if you say yer mef
>Mefhead

>>44275090
I liked being psyopped by terves

>>44275090
Even worse, it's a term AGPoids use to distance themselves from the (accurate) idea people have developed of them. It's like prostitutes who call themselves sex workers.

File: __natsume_an_an_mahou_sho(...).jpg (110 KB, 850x1133)

110 KB JPG

When I was 12 years old and I first began to develop a sexuality I had also become interested in an anonymous anime discussion board i found out about through otakon. Which, reading the board told me that "yuri is the purest form of love". For this reason I sought out yuri and stories about two girls in love... I found it to be very lovely, but eventually ran into a predicament: as a male, there would always be some difference between myself and the characters. Which I didn't mind, but it was not long before something else caught my attention. Otokonokos and feminisation manga, which featured childlike and adolescent males, which I was at the time, and found it to be easier to identify with. After a few years of this, I grew interested in dressing and passing perfectly as female, like the boys in my favorite manga. Unfortunately puberty was not kind to me and it was so disheartening that I repressed for several years...

pausing my sissy hypno to send this. for me it was because i hated myself for crossdressing when i was young. i knew it was wrong to want to crossdress so i leaned into forcefem fantasies as a way of avoiding that guilt. when i did crossdress i felt so guilty and ashamed for being an effeminate fag but i felt so safe at the same time. over time my brain prob formed a link between that shame and happiness cause now its a fetish for me

File: Yukio+2-2027363970.jpg (359 KB, 1680x1259)

359 KB JPG

>>44275827
>hated myself for crossdressing when I was young
You know what you must do

>>44275827
do you still crossdress? or are you repping and keeping it as a hidden fetish?

>>44275827
i heard repping makes you develop mef and i think it's my case

>>44275642
I don't get it

>>44275090
Who cares, it's hot
idk why this specific strain of fetishism seems to draw the ire of "UMMM ACKSHUALLY" troons so much when there are people out there eating diapers and shit. Go psychoanalyze and needle them or something

>>44276111
>idk why this specific strain of fetishism seems to draw the ire of "UMMM ACKSHUALLY" troons so much
Because there's a lot of emotional investment into the concept of 'trutrans'. MEFs usually defy that. When applied consistently you get all sorts of weird shit.
Like I'm not 'trutrans' even though I'm a postop tranny who lives with her bf because I didn't think of myself as a girl when I was 10 and (gasp!) I lived as a straight man until 2017. Meanwhile, a terminally online autistic shut-in who posts gock and has a diaper fetish is 'trutrans' because she insists she's always been a girl.
Also, MEF is a lot more straightforward (pun intended) and doesn't leave room for much reinterpretation.
And, finally, most trannies today aren't also transsexual. While MEFy girls almost always are because it's in the name. If you take MEF seriously, that is.

>>44276184
Most trutrans trannies are basically lookmaxxers in practice

>>44276111
>>44276184
this nvke

>>44275893
i still crossdress because it feels amazing. its always a really emotional experience for me. i live with others though so i cant do it very often. only when theyre asleep. none of them know that i do this

>>44276184
I wonder how many are like you who fully transitioned due to mef. I developed mef due to repressing but I was already dysphoric before, sadly

MEF sounds hot but I would feel like a fraud if I transitioned for it

>>44276229
Straight trannies that actually make it or are determined to make it almost always end up befriending a MEFy like me. Not only because we can easily bond but also because trannies like me can usually teach something and looksmaxxers can usually teach something back.
>>44276294
>sadly
It doesn't really matter once you stop repping.
Dysphoric or not, the pathway is largely identical.

>>44276327
>I would feel like a fraud if I transitioned for it
As opposed to transitioning for a non-descript random criteria list developed by a homophobic boomer 40+ years ago.
Get real. You can transition for any reason you want. Nobody will know or care if you pass and/or if you enjoy your life and role.
Ironically, the "trutrans" ideology created more reppers while at the same time getting people to troon who absolutely weren't ready for it.

>>44276375
I already stopped repping and it's still there

>>44276401
You're based for this one MEFperv

File: IMG_7739.png (226 KB, 779x663)

226 KB PNG

>>44274656
as a kid my dad left me and then my step dad yelled me a lot for being too feminine or sensitive. eventually he left me in 4th grade and in the same year we had a new boy in my school and i had a huge crush on him. i dont know if these two things are related but maybe.

>>44276451
Yes, of course MEF doesn't go away if you stop repping. What I meant is that it doesn't matter why you developed MEF and whether you're dysphoric or not. The pathway is still the same: use MEF to fuel your transition.
Is it harder? Yes. But not significantly harder. It still requires discipline and taking all of this very seriously.
>>44276467
IDK Snoymoder. But it deeply saddens me to see trannies that could in fact make it get stuck because of crazy ideas. Or perfectly fine HRT femboys rushing too hard because they think they're not "valid" (another crazy idea).
The opposite is also true. I see people who should only be trooning if they are actively solving their concurrent issues too, but instead they just make being a troon their whole life/identity and then are shocked when they fail even if they pass.
It's all a mess. I am a direct beneficiary from the de facto death of gatekeeping. So far for me to advocate gatekeeping. But the current situation is in many ways worse. You could lie your way through the old gatekeeping. But the new soft gatekeeping (through ideas like 'trutrans') is far more insidious.

>>44276491
I grew up self censoring liking things that were banned for boys as a kid, and I was still bullied because I'm sensitive anyway

>>44276568
I mean both are insidious for various reasons. I know I was deeply hurt by Susan's Place "trutrans" ideas and then hurt by late 2010s Tumblr sneedery.

>>44276568
I'm fine with MEF. For me it's just being turned on by the feeling of emasculation

>>44276568
But classical gatekeeping is also based on the notion of trutrans

>>44276568
your MEF journey was yearslong, but I'm at the very start so it seems quite overwhelming and something I'm questioning very strongly: do I want this?

>>44276589
im so sosorry. u r beautiful the way u r and didnt deserve to be bullied. never let anyone shame u for being sensitive now please.

>>44276634
>your MEF journey was yearslong
Not really. I gave in to the fetish in 2017, started hrt, had my first bf before Christmas of 2017, was out as a tranny by 2019 and I was due for SRS in 2020. But SRS got postponed due to the pandemic restrictions. If that hadn't happened, it would've been one of the shortest transition journeys, lol.
>do I want this?
And this is why I'm hoping to eventually write a guide. A very long and comprehensive one.
But the gist is this: leave off-ramps.
Start dating men. See if you like IRL to be trubosubmissive to men. If yes, start HRT. See how it goes. Re-evaluate after a year minimum (let your body readjust). Still like it? Great. Time for FFS and fulltime girlmoding.
Still like it? Schedule SRS (it's at least one year waiting) and date for marriage or long term relationship.
You can stretch this timeline anywhere between 2 and 7 years, depending on how you feel about it. And you can drop at any point before SRS if you find out it's not for you.
You think I was sure of everything right from the getgo? Haha, no. I was scared shitles (no pun intended) first time I had sex with a guy. And second and third time. By the 10th time I was craving it.
I was super scared when my breasts started seriously developing. But my fwb grabbed them I loved it and so I figured it out that this is in fact for me.
And don't get me started on womanmoding in public. I might have had close-to-lethal heart rates for the first 5 minutes I walked in public towards the bus station. Took me several days to no longer be scared. By one month I was like "what's the big deal?"
Yes, it's not easy. But it's also not that hard. And you have multiple points where you can bail.
The only truly hard part was the recovery from SRS. Still very glad I went through with it, but that was harsh, indeed.

>>44276825
How do you propose starting to date men?

Fear isn't a huge deal for me, it's more my motivation that's an issue. Hard to go through all these steps motivated purely by my dick getting hard lol. especially with depression

>>44276874
>motivated purely by my dick getting hard
I was motivated by my dick getting soft, actually :3
>>44276845
Uhm... just hit on bifags and fags?
I never used a dating app (and hopefully never will). The local gay bar and queer-coded events worked just fine.
I did start with a fwb for convenience. He knew nothing about trannies but was really curious and I had never had sex with a guy. So we learned quite a bit from each other. He is now in a long-term relationship with a tranny, lol.
The second guy I met at the local gay bar.
The third guy (and still my bf, really fiance atp) I met at one of the few events held in 2021. It was a boring open-air concert but it was big enough to allow socialization.

>>44277001
(the question wasn't for me but for anyone else curious)
I have been hit on by men at gay bars and stuff though I have a bf (long distance) so I turn them down.

It does seem like a reliable strategy and I'd probably have gone home with a guy the other week if I wasn't in a relationship.

I think I feel sexually frustrated if I don't feel emasculated during sex

>>44277001
mefperv, did you write the sexuality self-conversion guide?

>>44277423
I do e-mail back and forth with a few mefys on such thing but I am not/wont be the main author.
Unless there already is another guide somewhere else, in which case I wanna see it and no, I did not write that one (if such thing exists).
I do think more such resources should exist tho, even if the majority will seethe and cuss at it.

>>44277458
>https://archived.moe/lgbt/thread/41887627/#41887627
It's somewhat recent.

>>44277502
Oh I know the author of this one! We talk every now and then. She helped me out before though I haven't actually committed to this guide.

>>44277502
Oh, I am aware of that one. No, I am not the author of that one.
It is a very good starting point but it's far from a complete guide.
A complete guide would be 50+ pages and with examples and more detailed explanations. Nothing like that can be done on 4chan.
I wish I were a stereotypical tranny and be good enough with computers to just create a mef resources site or some shit where we post long essays free from trolling, ragebait and negging.
>I haven't actually committed to this guide
You should. Unironically the behavioral conditioning points are very solid. There's a reason those get the most hatred.

>>44274957
>Fembrained
>Used goods with a debtor bf among others
>Had to settle for betabuxx husband
Grim

>>44277502
Oh I know that one! I saw it recommended on a thread once

>>44277640
>i need to be feminized
we know, cismoid

going to buy niancinamide and castor oil.

>>44277640
Will you

>>44277502
>>44277556
>>44277458
You may want to check this one out too
https://archived.moe/lgbt/thread/42799031

wtf is a mef? you bitches keep coming with new pseudosciencie babble and I can't keep up with it.

File: 20251127_030717.jpg (383 KB, 1597x1210)

383 KB JPG

>>44274656
I mean I've always wanted to be a girl but I unironically developed MEF after my first bf basically forced me into it. Stuff like spanking me and calling me a failed male, to making me only wear lace panties and bras, to forcing me on my knees to suck his cock whenever wherever even in an elevator.

>>44277645
(˘ 3˘)

I've had a diaper fetish for as long as I can remember, at least since I'm like 9. in my early 20s that started to develop into a sissy baby fetish, until it blossomed into a full blown MEF. I can't even get off if it's not fantasizing about getting feminized and babified. I don't think this is normal, but I don't care.

>>44277605
Google doc with limited access?

whats MEF
i might be it without knowing
i know im a mentally ill fraud anyway

>>44278663
You gotta be kidding me. It's a full hassle to maintain an anon google account. Let alone to ask everyone else to do the same in order to submit stories.
Not to mention that Google will censor something like this. It's enough for 10-15 people to report it as NSFW (and such a guide would necessarily be nsfw).
No, the solution will have to be a website with submissions, so anyone can read it but nobody can be doxxed since all the authors would be pseudonyms and the admin would also be anon.

>>44278675
if this were an old forum
you would be told
use the search function

>>44278685
Uhmm I'm fetishizing being a dumb blonde so I can't.

>>44278675
masochistic emasculation fetishist.

>>44276111
>implying mefs won't eat shit if their master told them to

File: 1780255364255136.jpg (428 KB, 1532x2500)

428 KB JPG

>>44274656
>When and how did you develop it?
I view MEF as an infohazard. If I hadn't accidentally come across erotic fiction online about a guy being forcefemmed (buy a guy, none of that weird "mistress" nonsense) then I never would've even considered it. I came across that stuff again in my early 20s and that's what finally broke me. Now I have boobs and a pussy, and a long-term bf...

>>44276825
Were you as afraid of SRS as you were of starting the other things? Or do you think you will be as afraid of it?
I was excited and terrified when I got the email that my SRS date was reserved. When my first plane for Thailand took off, pretty sure I was involuntarily shaking lol...

The first time I had sex I wasn't too afraid, just worried a little that I'd regret it if it turned out I didn't like men after all. Mostly I was just turned on and wanted him really badly.

>>44280241
What was your timeline like?

>>44280522
Transition timeline?

>>44280241
>Were you as afraid of SRS as you were of starting the other things?
No. Especially since the surgery got postponed so by the time I actually got into the OR I was rolling my eyes in a "let's get this over with". My expectations with regards to the harshness of the recovery ended up matching reality quite well.
Understand that I lived as a perfectly normative cishet man until the spring of 2017 and liked it too. Emasculation fetish was a kink in my mind that i'd been satiating by jerking off to gay and tranny porn. I was slowly identifying with the receptive partner more and more but it wasn't a big deal.
When my last gf left me I got into exploring and a few months later I had convinced a bitop friend to get into a fwb arrangement with me. We were both single anyway.
>The first time I had sex I wasn't too afraid
I believe you. But I was scared even though it was with a friend I trusted (still do we're still friends, he's in a long relationship with a tranny now,). I had already done some anal training alone so had an idea of what was getting myself into.
While I was deeply curious and absolutely wanted it, for a lifetime straight dude to bend over to get fucked is still scary. Certainly was for me.
>what if it hurts? (it did)
>what if he doesn't like it? (he did)
Despite the worries I still proceeded because in the days prior I had given him blowjobs and it turned out to be just as hot IRL as in the fantasies so I already had a small mental confirmation that this isn't entirely a crazy kink but something that I might like after all.
>worried a little that I'd regret it if it turned out I didn't like men after all
I had no such worry. If that turned out to be the case, I'd just return to cishet life now with more experience. This was probably an asset all my life: i was always genuinely sex positive and willing to try.
Anyway, the first few times was weird, but not bad. The turning point was probably when he came really hard while he was railing me prone.

>>44280954
Kinda, but moreso in the context of MEF

>>44281464
Your username is MEFhead. Are you okay?

MEFperv have you done any other surgeries like FFS and BA?

>>44281577
FFS, yes. BA, no. I also had rib remodeling in Turkey.
I decided against BA because I like the sensitivity a lot. The esthetic gains aren't worth losing or jeopardizing that. Since my transition was entirely sexually motivated, that remains my priority.
Rib remodeling made sense so he can grab me better.

>>44281633
Which ribs were remodeled, which surgeon, and how much did it cost?

>Since my transition was entirely sexually motivated, that remains my priority.
Weren't you afraid that because your transition was purely sexual you would regret it? I mean there is always time when libido is smaller and you dont feel sexual tension.

>>44281671
>cost
9000 euros including traveling costs, in 2024.
>which ribs
all three floating one (so 10, 11 and 12)
>which surgeon
Dr Curver clinic in Izmir. I wasn't operated by the well-known leading specialist but by one of his proteges (who no longer works there now).
It was a calculated risk. Waiting lists to dr. Hassan personally are quite long and I was unwilling to wait. The result is acceptable for me. It's ~90% of the quality that would've been with dr. Hassan (according to the highly obsessed people on the forums).
Understand, I'm not a looksmaxxer. I'm a perv.

>>44281693
>Weren't you afraid that because your transition was purely sexual you would regret it?
Honestly? No.
Let's say, for the sake of the argument, that at some point in the future I will end up regretting it. So what? I still got to live some amazing years and have a life that 99% of humans will never have.
How many people get to live as a de facto husband to a woman and a de facto wife to a man before turning 35? That in itself is amazing.
>I mean there is always time when libido is smaller and you dont feel sexual tension
Eh, my libido is now (when I'm chill and not horny) about 70% of what it was in 2016. You don't understand how hypersexual I am.

>>44281633
damn MEFperv can you help me out im in a bit of a quagmire and idk what to do with my life ive been severely brainwormed by the trutrans stuff and i feel like a fraud for wanting to transition because im pretty sure i contracted the desire through online pornography so unable to put up a "pure" trans narrative which has been bugging me out esp while shouldering the guilt of being a lackluster only child from a decently well off family but like its quite a persistent desire to transition that im only hesitating because i just dont have the "pure" trutrans rationale for.
i just need your advice i guess lmao. im pretty sure the thoughts of transition will never go away despite having that muddy, perverted beginning.
i guess im in the same position that you once were, im okay with being a male and i can imagine myself with a future as a normal one but these thoughts just keep bugging me... in varying intensities.

>>44281754
Hmmm gotcha gotcha
What would you say your rib shape was before and afterwards?

>I still got to live some amazing years and have a life that 99% of humans will never have.
That means that transition become emotionally motivated. You are used to this and you like it. If I ever transition I would transition for also this reason to have a boyfriend. So my motivation is rather something like transmaxxing rather than MEF but also something because i would want vagina for him. I dont know if I want to transition but I should give myself time.

being a mef passoid feels so good. i always try to act like a normal girl when i hang with my girl friends but internally i'm giggling.

>>44281885
"trutrans" is an ideology. It's not real.
What's real is whether you can pull it off and you're okay with the risks (including the risk of failure and have an idea what to do in that case).
Nobody gives a fuck IRL why you did it, except some men who are specifically into forcefem (who find it hot) and some autistic shut-ins who hate you. It's not like I walk around with a "mefperv" label on my forehead, lol. I'm a regular woman now.
>im pretty sure i contracted the desire through online pornography
So what? Gender euphoria is just as good of a reason as any other.
>guess im in the same position that you once were
Maybe? I never cared about the 'tru' thing. I always found it cringe.
Once I figured it out that I enjoy being with men and it's technically doable, my doubts went away.

>>44282041
I’ve yet to decide if mefperv is actually a delusional hon or actually a passoid.

>>44281885
You are so fucking lame

Kys

>>44282064
thanks

>>44282051
what's the most you've lost on a coin toss

>>44282051
it's cooler if she's a passoid but that's me being a weirdo perv probably

>>44282093
Like $5, why?
>>44282190
Bitterhon me wants her to be a hon, nice me wants a passoid.

>>44282203
flip a coin and that shall dictate whether mefperv is a passoid or a hon

>>44282239
Passoid. I didn’t have a coin so I flipped a CD-ROM.

>>44282252
then passoid she shall be

>>44282093
Kys u pathetic freak

Only a loser would want to be a part of yer shit

>>44282041
aight thanks ill consider

>>44282298
thanks i figured actually

File: 1753646226516747.png (41 KB, 960x1280)

41 KB PNG

>>44281464
>ME F(emale?) isnt a real thing.
but agp is
and youre agp

>>44274656
I dont really have MEF cuz I dont find it degrading or humiliating to be feminized or take the feminine role in sex...but I first put on some panties and got an erotic thrill when I was 8 or 9. I think it developed cuz I was always small for my age and always told I was "cute" ...and as the youngest of 3 boys- the other 2 much taller/better at sports etc....I became the de facto daughter lol. Not really but there is a hint of truth as I was close with my mom, much more sensitive and communicative than my brothers...I was always hypersexual and chasing girls around...but has this sexy secret that I indulged to varying degrees over the yrs.

>>44282051
What if I'm both?
At 170cm I'm not exactly the cutest passoid possible but also not quite easily clockable. I really am a regular mid.
Real-life passing is way easier than this board would have you believe. Perfectly nice passoids are called "hons" on this board based on very autistic "ratios" and measurements that literally zero people care about when you're out and about. Such neuroticism comes from not living life, imo, and not actually observing real people on the streets.
I voicepass and dress as regular cis women my age do (even a bit more conservative). Haven't been addressed in the masculine since late 2019. It's enough for me. It helps a lot that I've never been brainwormed. Some of the criteria that I read on this board come off as crazy to me.

>>44282649
Happy for you, hope I can get there eventually. Need FFS tho

>>44281932
>means that transition become emotionally motivated
Of course there is some emotional motivation going forward. It maybe wasn't at first, but it certainly is now.
>You are used to this and you like it
Of course I'm used to this. As for liking it, idk. I like that I get to live as a woman, but I also liked that I got to live as a man. I never was "socially dysphoric" or any of that.
My euphoria comes when I have sex and when I go out with my man to places as a couple. Everything else is a bonus.
>my motivation is rather something like transmaxxing rather than MEF
>i would want vagina for him
You're implying the two are mutually exclusive. But they're not.
Transmaxxing is transition for reasons that do not fit the "official" criteria of dysphoria. "I want to be a sexually submissive woman because I find that hot" doesn't fit the criteria, but it's literally the reason I did it.
Your rationale is not significantly different from mine.

>>44281754
>according to the highly obsessed people on the forums
what forums?

>>44282649
I do think just a few inches of height does a lot, partly because a bunch of other features correlate with height and also because being tall itself is the basis by which a lot of people are clocked.

Like imo to pass to men, being shorter than them matters a lot.

Ugh why will nobody treat me like a faggot whore and use me for my body

>>44282773
>being shorter than them matters a lot
keyword is "shortER". Everyone interprets this as needing to be 15+ cm shorter.
My bf is 176cm. So less than 2" taller. But because he's a man and I'm not, the contrast is huge.

>>44282847
Yes but a lot of girls here are as tall if not taller than the median man, and that stands out.

>>44282880
Cultural issue. I'm not american or brit so this isn't an issue here.
https://www.yahoo.com/news/walmart-fires-64-cisgender-woman-210344920.html - reading shit like this genuinely bewilders me. Angloid culture is literally sick.
With that said, tall cis women also get a lot of shit. Less so than tiny/short cis men but still pretty bad.
It's why I fundamentally reject this constant philosophy that one should care that much what others think. You will never please everyone or even most people.
too tall and tranny? hon
too tall and cisf? tranny
too short and tranny? uncanny
too short and cism? manlet
median height for your desired gender? lemme look at your face and ratios to get you to beinsecure
median height for your sex and you're cis? you're a mid nobody
And on and on like that it goes. It's stupid and it's meant to demoralize everyone. If it's no height, it's the voice. If it's not voice, then hands, WHR, adam's apple (or lack thereof), or really anything.
The best move is not to play. All humans are imperfect in some way. Correct what you can, accept what you can't and just live. The best victory against haters is continuing to live and live really well.

>>44274656
bump

>>44282633
just sounds like agp

File: HHjgbnga4AAoAXR.jpg (204 KB, 900x1200)

204 KB JPG

>>44281203
>Emasculation fetish was a kink in my mind that i'd been satiating by jerking off to gay and tranny porn. I was slowly identifying with the receptive partner more and more but it wasn't a big deal.
This is so relatable... I remember first getting off to forcefem material and thinking that I just wanted a "trap gf". Over a year of reading that material to get off, I went from wanting to be the top to fully wanting to be the receptive partner, forced SRS and all. It took another year to finally throw away the femboy cope and start in full HRT. When I started it I remember thiking I was just curious and would "stop taking it in a few months"...
>I had given him blowjobs and it turned out to be just as hot IRL as in the fantasies
I gave him my first blowjob and we had sex right after it in the same session. No easing into it at all lol. My only regret is not being able to climax since I already hated my dick and covered it with my hand the whole time...

>>44281274
>Kinda, but moreso in the context of MEF
I'll try ig.
I was first exposed to forcefem (and forced SRS/marriage) reading material when I was maybe 16. Thought it was super arousing at the time but never considered that I'd ever not be the man in the situation. Didn't see a hint of it for years after that. I was probably 23 when I rediscovered that kind of stuff again as reading material, but I also started lurking in "trap" threads in /b/ and learned that HRT was a thing. Within a year I went from wanting to have a "trap" gf to wanting to be a femboy for men. I genuinely believe some of that was caused by the forcefem infohazard thing I mentioned before. I femboyrepped for another year and tried out makeup and crossdressing in secret in that time. At 25 I became really concerned about hair loss and finasteride wasn't working so I ordered diy HRT and started taking it in secret.
1/2

File: 48204096910491.png (560 KB, 600x917)

560 KB PNG

>>44283645
2/2
After a year and a half I couldn't hide my breasts anymore so I decided to come out to everyone. I didn't believe that I was a dysphoric trutranny but I still called myself a trans woman because it was easier to explain to normies. I started getting laser and electro, and about a year later I kind of accepted that I would never be going back to being a man and got all my legal stuff changed over; and got my first singular FFS procedure about a year and a half later. I got my SRS spot reserved at 3 years into HRT, and my SRS was in Thailand a year later. Started dating my bf at 3 years into HRT also, and we had PiV sex for the first time when I was 3 months post-op.

Now I'm nearly 3 years post-op and my bf and I have lived together for a couple of years. I know he means to propose to me soon (he's saving for a ring, and is bad at hiding it lol). Lately we've been experimenting a lot more with dom sub atuff. We already have a free use agreement (with an extremely embarrassing safe word). I never cared about makeup aside from covering up my face in the early years, but now I'm really working hard to learn it so I can be beautiful more often for him. We've also started having him force me to wear revealing or lewd clothing when we're home together after work (he doesn't have to force me, he commands me to and I do it...) I've also been really motivated lately to learn to orgasm from penetration alone. I want my only sexual pleasure to be from submitting fully and completely to him... After we marry we're planning to adopt or use surrogacy, whichever is actually feasible for a tranny x cishet man couple.

>>44281633
>>44281693
>my transition was sexually motivated btw kekeke
>aren't you worried by your transition being sexually motivated?
this interaction happens multiple times in every mef thread. starting to think its a psyop...

>>44283754
What’s your safeword Nona? I really like that idea though I haven’t thought to have it be something really embarrassing to say before!

>>44283836
Pineapple

>>44283867
What? Whys that embarrassing

>>44283874
That anon isn't me, lmao.
The idea was the word would be so embarrassing that I'd really have to mean it to use it.

>>44283632
Whats the difference? im so confused. so many labels, acroynms its like a gaint clusterfuck of vague notions and opinions.

>>44283754
Would you say you pass?
Oddly, for some reason, I am not formally out everywhere despite everyone knowing I'm a tranny (I've had breasts for a while now), but the timelines seem to not be too dissimilar in terms of mid-20s onwards.

>>44283874
>>44283881
:D wouldn't it be pretty embarrassing to just blurt out pineapple all of a sudden? Besides pineapple tastes really good, but if you have too much of it, it burns your mouth. It fits, yeah?

In pretty sure I'm MEF but I have gender dysphoria and feel sexually frustrated as a man

>>44283645
>forced SRS and all
I didn't get to that part until after I was on hrt for quite some time.
I always was (and still am) a largely visual person (inb4 moidbrained, kek) so I watched porn (still do). I always was sex positive so I watched all kinds of porn. But primarily normal cishet, masc x masc and straight tranny (in retrospect I realize I never liked the tranny porn where the tranny tops)
Idk the exact moment but i was probably 21 or so when i realized that i was self inserting more and more primarily as the submissive/bottom. Didn't bother me and just kept it as a kink. Turned out useful a few years later heh
>first blowjob and we had sex right after
My fwb was curious about trannies and forcefem and I was scared. The easing into it helped both of us in the long run.
>only regret is not being able to climax
wasn't even expecting to. Too scared and also too excited of the new experience.
I was still after all a straight man purposefully choosing to bend over and get fucked. It was a mindfuck too. Especially since I chose to do it again and again even though the first experiences were objectively meh.
Besides, him cumming was more important.
>hated my dick and covered it with my hand the whole time
Never had that problem. Tho I put a chastity or a fufu clip on it soon after because the temptation to touch myself was hard to withstand. Still is, except today it's okay if I do.

>>44283820
the 'trutrans' brainworm fried so many brains that i don't think it's unusual for reppers and early trans to keep on asking about this.
if it's a psyop, it's a good one since the whole 'tru' crap really needs to die off.

>>44283938
>Would you say you pass?
Yeah, I do. I'm just not super attractive so I kind of blend in.
>Oddly, for some reason, I am not formally out everywhere despite everyone knowing I'm a tranny (I've had breasts for a while now), but the timelines seem to not be too dissimilar in terms of mid-20s onwards.
Is an identity thing that's making you not come out?

>>44284323
>Didn't bother me and just kept it as a kink.
When I realized it was admiring the submissive/receptive role that drew me into that stuff, I kind of had an existential crisis...

>>44285821
kinda? hard to say
unique life stuff + health issues + weird fagmoding made me very neurotic about identity
I used to have panic attacks about being a guy and then I started having panic attacks about being a woman soooo

>>44285821
>When I realized it was admiring the submissive/receptive role that drew me into that stuff, I kind of had an existential crisis...
Whew! I guess I can be very grateful that none of that happened to me. It's amazing how many troubles i got to avoid by simply being sex positive and an honest perv.
Glad you got over it.
I saw you posting in the 'cis man on hrt' thread and you really really should kill those brainworms.

File: GgNqyJ3agAA_LFU.jpg (182 KB, 800x1200)

182 KB JPG

>>44285905
>It's amazing how many troubles i got to avoid by simply being sex positive and an honest perv.
I think I just had the misfortune of being raised in a very homophobic (school) environment. A lot of that was internalized and I'm still working through that.
>I saw you posting in the 'cis man on hrt' thread and you really really should kill those brainworms.
I'm trying. In that thread I was mentioning how I'm kind of coming to terms with the fact that I didn't transition solely because of dysphoria. Dysphoria was the majority reason why but there was definitely a HSTS aspect too (wanting to be with men, but not comfortable doing that as a man, probably due to the internalized homophobia. Another aspect was absolutely the MEF. The thought of being emasculated, permanently changed, and forced to be someone's woman were all extremely appealing especially in the stage right before transition and before SRS. That aspect has mellowed out a lot though, I'm mostly just into the submission and CnC aspects of MEF with my bf now...

>>44284363
trve

>>44286325
>very homophobic (school) environment
A few teachers were homophobes, but most genuinely didn't give af. Ig it helped that I could easily cishet pass. Still, had a flaming faggot as a colleague and he would mock the teachers easily until they'd stfu, lol.
>That aspect has mellowed out a lot though
IKTF. Lots of mefs change quite a bit after they settle down postop. Some become perfectly boring women, while others reevaluate (like we apparently did).
>submission and CnC
Oh yeah.
I'm still euphoric though for being called a failed fag or reminded that I used to fuck women. Ig deep down i am an honest masochist. I like the torment in a playful way. I'd argue it's healthier that way than through self-hatred (as sadly too many trannies end up).
>I'm trying
Well, try harder :)
I'm not saying this to put you down (quite the opposite!). I'm saying it because you need to look forward, especially since you do have great things to be looking forward to.
Yes, i get it, you need closure/coming to terms. But you need to live your life now even more. You are loved and desired and you're starting a family. That's now and in the near future. That matters a lot more than what happened 10-15 years ago in school.
I didn't have so much doubt as you, but I had my doubts too, ofc. But it did come a moment of "you know what? I like this. so this stays. time to live"
If not for mef, i'd routinely forget i'm a tranny. It's now more or less our little secret between me and my man. Not saying you should forget (it's impossible anyway and you really shouldn't), but I am saying that you should allow the past to become the past and not let it constantly torment you in the present (unless it's kinky or hot, ofc).

>>44286325
Oh wow we're more similar than I thought. Was it a religious school environment?

>>44286652
What happened to chasergen?

>>44286745
jannies kept deleting it
like four times

>>44286773
That's fucking weird, for what reason?

>>44286801
idk jannies are Satan

File: Citlali.600.4314613.jpg (90 KB, 600x939)

90 KB JPG

>>44285830
>and then I started having panic attacks about being a woman soooo
Can you elaborate? Idk about you but when it first sunk in that I really was a tranny and I was going to have to deal with this as big part of my life, I broke down and kind of cried in bed for the better part of a day :(

>>44286652
>Was it a religious school environment?
Not quite. Just a regular public school in a deep red state. I think the worst part is I didn't think at the time that those teachers were fucked up abusers. I genuinely believed that they were trying to help me.

>>44286813
So, the panic attacks were a big deal at various different times. Some were over health issues and not being sure I was really trans or whatever.

It was shortly after my sister died that I started having panic attacks over being a woman. I started, oddly, to pass to myself in the mirror for a bit and that terrified me. I passed to myself then when I don't pass to myself now. I then went back and forth on fagmoding for a while and since December of last year I've mostly just done tshirts and pants as attire.

Teachers can be really fucked up, and there's no hate like conservative "love." Are there are particular memories that come to mind that you're okay sharing?

>>44283754
NTA
>learn to orgasm from penetration alone
>I want my only sexual pleasure to be from submitting fully and completely to him
These two are in part mutually exclusive. Or it'd end up in taking a long time to try to achieve them at once.
The fastest way to get yourself more comfortable to orgasm from penetration alone is to actively explore yourself both alone and with your guy. Relying only on him (or only on masturbation) will deliver poor and slow results. Both will speed up the process.
It needn't be either or and you need not be ashamed of it either. Orgasm with a man is different than orgasm with a sex toy which is also different than orgasm with your fingers and all three are different from orgasm from anal, if you still do that. None is necessarily "better" they're all different.
And nothing bad happens if you touch yourself during sex, i promise. My husband loves doggy but i cant cum from that, so i give him what he wants but i also rub it while he rails me. when he lets me because sometimes he holds my hands to deny me an orgasm.
You two should also try various surfaces. It's how I accidentally discovered that on a specifc sofa i actually do orgasm from doggy and that he cums harder if I ride him on that sofa.
Take ownership of your sexuality, nona.
t. >>44274957

File: 195207b8db967100.png (2.25 MB, 1672x2508)

2.25 MB PNG

>>44286846
>I passed to myself then when I don't pass to myself now.
Are you sure you aren't being too hard on yourself now vs then?
>Are there are particular memories that come to mind that you're okay sharing?
Well in one of them I was in maybe 3rd grade. I was holding friends with a friend classmate who was also a boy. One of the teachers saw that, jerked us apart and immediately started screaming at us, saying boys can't do that sort of thing, saying doing that would turn us into fags. We both got scolded hard by her and then banned from recess for a day. I was put in another classroom with a teacher I didn't know for that period of time to keep us apart.
The stupidest part is, I don't even remember who initiated the handholding and I don't think it was anything other than platonic. We were little kids for crying our loud...
I still know that guy btw. He knows I'm a tranny too. Idk if he remembers, and honestly I don't have any interest even if I was single because he's literally a manwhore now lol.

>>44287103
Holding hands*
Dang it.

>>44287103
No I took pictures and my ass did not pass, just enough that my brain noticed things were actually different.

First time I truly recognized myself as a woman in my own home I was overjoyed for like five minutes and then had a crying, guilt-ridden breakdown.

>Well in one of them...
That's awful :(((

File: 5920598284010.png (453 KB, 600x600)

453 KB PNG

>>44286634
>had a flaming faggot as a colleague and he would mock the teachers easily until they'd stfu, lol.
Based.
>Lots of mefs change quite a bit after they settle down postop.
Not surprising desu. It's a life-altering surgery and forces you to have a lot of down time where you inevitably reflect on stuff and on who you are.
>I'm still euphoric though for being called a failed fag
Funny thing about that. After some of these kinds of threads recently, I asked my bf if he could call me a tranny again sometimes during sex. He hecking uno-revesed it on me in the act, telling me if I wanted that he'd have to hear me calling myself a tranny during sex first... That meanie!
>Well, try harder :)
I am trying! Like said I'm trying to honestly intreospect about why I'm trans now and not just using dysphoria alone as the excuse. I want to come to terms with and understand all the motivations and make peace with them so I can move on...
>You are loved and desired and you're starting a family. That's now and in the near future.
I sure hope that it's a near future thing and not 10+ years from now :(
>"you know what? I like this. so this stays. time to live"
That's a good mindset.

>>44287224
>uno-revesed it on me in the act, telling me if I wanted that he'd have to hear me calling myself a tranny during sex first
Hot. Or at least to me. I do sometimes go 'i'm just a boy' to get him to say he needs to fuck the boy out of me.
>I sure hope that it's a near future thing and not 10+ years from now
Have some hope, but also be realistic.
Adoptions are hard now everywhere (globally the fertility rate is collapsing) and surrogacy is still not easily accessible. So at least on the children front, it will take quite a bit of time regardless of what route you two are choosing.
I looked it up closer for my country because we kinda want that too.

>>44287098
Sorry Nona. I was er, busy with my bf. I'll try to respond tomorrow if the thread is still here.

>>44278148
>picrel
please be a boy please be a boy

>acutely aware of being shorter/physically weak by age 6-8
>bodyswap daydreams and fantasies about being turned into a girl age 7~
>feel pressure to fake interest in sports and be good at them 8-14~
>immediately drawn to "forced" bi/sissy porn around 14 when porn consumption began
that's also about the time i began experimenting with anal, crossdressing, and cum eating... and also when i mentally gave up on trying to fake male interests. then began the slow tumble of social withdrawal.

the earliest mef adjascent fantasy i had was compulsively thinking of my girl-best-friend/situationship who "dumped" me having sex with my friend who was this 6 foot something jock once they started dating lol. that shit drove me insane
~_~

>>44274656
Somewhat accidentally discovered it in 2024. Figured out it'd be useful to me and dived in. Didn't expect much but I thought even as a kink it would be fun. I was already 6 years into transition and with my now husband.
Problem is that as incel to trannymaxxer I had basically kept the bifag sexuality which was very useful early on. But as it was getting clear that I was heading to the life of a married wife, I needed a way to shift my mind. I already knew how plastic the brain can be so i figured it's worth a shot.
>how
Quite intentionally.
Got myself chastity and a vibrator, asked my husband to shame me for still having a dick and to stop touching it (not like i'd top him or anything but he'd sometimes reach to rub it), increased the AA dosage a bit and, most importantly, stopped jerking off altogether.
I don't read/watch much porn these days but the little I do is always masc x tranny and postop tranny.
Also made some more minor changes like tucking more tightly and no longer standing up to pee to slowly get my brain to accept srs as a likely outcome.
Just having more sex made things easier, desu.
Now I'm patiently waiting to be e-mailed the date of srs (i only have the interval) but this is likely the last summer I have to tuck.

>>44289044
Are you getting SRS because of the MEF, or did you explore MEF because you wanted SRS?

>>44289520
Yes.
No, seriously, it's a bit of both.
Long term use of AAs comes with risks. At some point I would've needed an orchi anyway.
Then, long term anal sex also comes with risks. SRS addresses both but with a higher risk profile short-term and a much lower risk profile long term (even when accounting for horror stories), at least for my situation.
MEF helps with convincing the brain that it's necessary using the weakest point of attack: sexuality.
The permanency of it can be scary, but it's less scary if viewed sexually, specifically through my sexual reality. I'm already perma bottom/submissive, barely get any erections anymore and masturbation is hard. Effectively my dick is useless. Leaning into MEF slowly eased my brain into seeing things this way.
Because I now also find the idea hot, I initiated sex a lot more often, which means more anal prep, more aftercare, more chores... which further changed my mind about SRS.
It's also a matter of principle: I made it from khhv incel to married woman. I should look like one without makeup at the beach.

>>44288588
>that shit drove me insane
hope you're better off now, nona.

>>44290193
oh no, that was years ago, i forgot all about it and she killed herself at 20. the guy became my best friend throughout highschool though.
i am, however way worse off now lmao

>>44290504
>way worse off now
sorry to hear that, nona :(

I really feel like I’ve missed out on life because I’ve basically HRT repped from 18 to 25. I know some nonas here started out later. I’m slightly MEF but probably don’t fit in here because I’m not ND, I always have had crippling dysphoria at being male since puberty. How do I fix this and get a social life and husband? I have a job but not a great one, but no friends and still live with my parents.

bump

>>44283908
Nobody can explain??

>>44292061
none of it matters just do what makes you happy

>>44292061
Lurk more

>>44292794
Dude please lock in

Mefgens are the only ones with actual discussion that isn't just chitchatting

>>44292890
in what sense do you mean

>>44293514
Just stop looking for a fetish that would destroy you

File: G7-j6RzaQAAGauZ.jpg (227 KB, 789x878)

227 KB JPG

>>44287098
>Or it'd end up in taking a long time to try to achieve them at once.
I know that. I can orgasm from penetration alone with a dildo alone already, but I haven't managed to during sex yet. It just takes too long for me to get there. Though he did get me closer to it last night than ever before I think...
>And nothing bad happens if you touch yourself during sex, i promise.
I know that, I just really find the idea of being penetrated until I climax, even if it's "nonconsensual" really hot... Obviously if we're cnc roleplaying I'm not gonna be touching myself during it.
>because sometimes he holds my hands to deny me an orgasm.
Ugh, I hate how appealing and hot this sounds to me. Maybe I'll ask my bf if he can try it on me...

>>44287419
>I do sometimes go 'i'm just a boy' to get him to say he needs to fuck the boy out of me.
Based. I'm still a bit too insecure to call myself a tranny to him irl but I want to improve...
>So at least on the children front, it will take quite a bit of time regardless of what route you two are choosing.
Yep, right now we are just saving money. Saving for marriage, saving for a house, saving for children.

>>44289678
>The permanency of it can be scary, but it's less scary if viewed sexually, specifically through my sexual reality.
It is a little scary, but that'll all go away once you have it. It's a nice comfort to know you can never go back and you're locked into this for the rest of your life.
>I'm already perma bottom/submissive, barely get any erections anymore and masturbation is hard. Effectively my dick is useless.
Exactly like me before my SRS, lol. It's crazy to think about how much it improved sex for me.

to me MEF is just AGP but for those who are ashamed of being this way, self-hating and probably androphilic
still love these threads though, need to chop my stupid dick off it still gets hard after a decade of hrt :( im jealous of you all with balls to go through with it

>>44294718
It's the opposite, agp is mef (emasculation trauma). https://www.oocities.org/transsexual_analysis/transsexual5.html

>>44294732
Idk, doesn't seem like all AGPs are that way
My AGP fantasies came before they were even MEF honestly

>>44294818
They don't have to be MEF for it to be caused by emasculation trauma

>>44294826
I guess but I feel like it just requires more than emasculation trauma, that has basically happened to all boys
I know I had dreams of having girl parts at like 6-7 so the trauma must have been there already

>>44294718
>im jealous of you all with balls to go through with it
What's got you scared of it Nona?

>>44294886
Idk I'm just fucking retarded and can't lock in on pushing myself to looking harder into it and committing.
like my life I have barely any grip
Also info is just so scattered online, I constantly feel like I'm not informed enough

>>44294855
Yeah mine started on early childhood too

>>44294855
All what you're arguing is explored in that website

>>44294969
About what? SRS?

>>44294987
>All what you're arguing is explored in that website
Maybe, it was a bit rough read I'm too ADHD for that shit in 2026. Also wondering why AGP is so varying in it's manifestation if its all just MEF, but I guess there's no alternative good explanation for that either.

>About what? SRS?
Yeah, not sure where to look really, I mean leddit exists I guess

I was told to share my thoughts >>44294854 here

>>44295149
>Yeah, not sure where to look really
What are you trying to find out? Cost? Insurance coverage? Waitlist times? Recovery difficulty? Dilation needs? Aesthetics? Sexual pleasure levels?

>>44295149
Yeah I was wrong about saying MEF. That website doesn't use the term MEF. It's just tying AGP and HSTS as effects of emasculation trauma

>>44293295
MEFgens have the only people on this board who are sure of/don't really care about their identity when it comes to HRT and SRS.
People who are that sure of themselves and of the path in life that they want are pretty chill to talk to and like handing out advice.

I wish I had trannymaxxer/MEF tranny friends irl.

File: dfb4c19285192c0d0e4e2a864(...).jpg (44 KB, 599x597)

44 KB JPG

Can I get some input? I am working from a position where I have detransitioned after having committed fully to a female identity. The whole experience is behind me, but it clings to me. I see no future in transition, socially, monetary, spiritually...idk. I don't understand how you are moving from male to female role, retaining your internal sense of identity (i.e. not falling into the trutrans trap) and maintaining financial independence. It's like a trinity where you can only have 2/3. I wonder if there is a hard line - dysphoric trannies whose transition is mainly tied to emotion, strong social ties, something in the bloodline...and then there's the people in this gen who seemingly have full social mobility. seems unreal. the closest I can imagine is living as a crossdresser while amassing wealth and inching away from social bonds which are attached to the male identity. in fact, the artificiality and stealth of that idea are appealing in some strange way. but, "I transitioned to secure resources". no soul attachment? ok lol.

>>44297387
Input on what, anon?

>>44297451
Do you think the ideas of this gen are applicable to someone who does not have the freedom of being in a cocoon? I've already exposed myself to my friends and family as a transgender woman. I'm no longer in the position where I can leave "off-ramps" and navigate transition tactically. Like, I want to be seen as a crossdresser, but I'm already a tranny. Is that crazy?

>>44297507
>Like, I want to be seen as a crossdresser
Is it that you want to be a man again? Or is more that you want to continue medical transition but do so in secret so you regret coming out?

File: beforeafter.jpg (146 KB, 1080x1080)

146 KB JPG

>>44297701
I want to be seen as a man whose desire to be a woman is expressed through crossdressing, that is, temporary dressup with a specific role. Outside of that ritual/scene, I feel like I just want to go about my day.
>continue medical transition
I want this if it means a total change of mindset, a new persona, new social role.

Crossdressing seems active and "plugged into" social archetypes.
Transition seems passive and reliant on other people recognizing you.
Maybe they are the same on different timelines?

>>44297782
By crossdressing do you mean like, a "wearing a sundress" tier of thing, or drag like in the picture you posted?
>Transition seems passive and reliant on other people recognizing you.
True, but that's because gender is supposed to be omnipresent unspoken, despite what leddit would have you believe. As far as that relates to MEF though, the transition is almost by definition supposed to be passive, EXCEPT for our partners. Kind of the whole point is that random people don't know you threw away your masculinity and permanently embraced submission for a fetish, they're supposed to just view you as a trans woman. It's the partner who's supposed to bully/tease you and make your face the reality that you're just a failed male and did all this tranny stuff ultimately for his amusement and your humiliation, hence "MEF".

>>44297782
this is literally just dressing down vs dressing up you don't need to complicate it

>>44297852
>By crossdressing do you mean like, a "wearing a sundress" tier of thing, or drag like in the picture you posted?
More like the picture. like, he has pictures in male and female personas and seems to switch between them based on how they fit the situation.
>the transition is almost by definition supposed to be passive...It's the partner who's supposed to bully/tease you
I might be honing in on this drag/crossdressing idea specifically because it seems to camouflage this dynamic. It avoids all of the trans woman identity stuff...that has caused me a lot of trouble and pain. I think my particular situation feels so exposed that there is no more room for a secret to exist and I'm coping desu.

>>44297870
It is complicated. I see your point tho.

>>44297929
How did it get so exposed? Do you go around telling people every detail of the tranny side of your life? Genuine question since like, people at my work know I'm a tranny but nobody ever asks me about it or talks to me about it (I prefer it that way)

>>44297973
No I'm private about it, but when I was a teenager I told my family I was going to transition and they raided my electronics/social media and gave to police(?). like I got my phone back and my parents sent insulting messages to my online friends from my account. uhm...maybe I haven't let that go and it's affecting me. I literally don't say a word about this stuff unless with close friends.

>>44297996
>I haven't let that go and it's affecting me.
Tbh that seems pretty clear.

>>44298014
I forgot about it until now. Ok, I see, thx for chat.

>>44298029
Just make sure you're doing what you do for yourself, not because of what others did to you anon.

>>44297996
Kys loser

>>44298425
bizarre response

>>44298463
Post tits

>>44294626
>Obviously if we're cnc roleplaying I'm not gonna be touching myself during it
Nona, roleplaying is fun as long as it's fun. Orgasm denial is hot if you know you can do it anytime, so not in your case YET.

>>44294626
>It's a nice comfort to know you can never go back and you're locked into this for the rest of your life
To be fair, I made peace with that formally when I signed the marriage certificate. But mentally I made peace with that in 2022 at the latest.
Everything I wanted from trannymaxxing actually happened. So going back is simply out of the question. Especially after I reconnected with some old friends who shunned me when I began transition. Seeing how they turned out is a guarantee that there is no 'going back' for me. Back to what? Lol.
>It's crazy to think about how much it improved sex for me
It's mostly what I'm expecting. This morning I woke up in the mood but there simply wasn't enough time for a quickie. There would have been if I had an srussy.
And being horny at work is... ugh. Not fun.
>>44294718
>>44294969
I'll be on the surgery table in a few months.
Here's the thing: there's never 'enough' information. You either want or you don't. And if you do, just look into techniques that come with self-lubrication and... that's really it.