Stronger Editionprevious: >>44488475Goal of the thread: Make a shopping list of things that you need, consider if there is any self care things you might be missing!Daily goals can be repeated. Remember to keep score, it can only go up!>What is this thread for?Getting better is hard, and sucks. A lot. It does not get easier doing it alone.Share resources and experiences with combating depression, anxiety, personal issues, achieving or maintaining a healthy weight, etc.>Why is this thread /lgbt/?Struggles with mental and physical health are an indisputable part of /lgbt/ life, be it from dysphoria, social pressure, heartbreak, or just unfortunate lifestyle choices.>Notes to consider:Please be civil. Shame is your greatest enemy in fighting urges of self abuse (be it sh, drugs, or just self deprecation). Relapsing into bad and unhealthy habits is to be expected, the goal is to increase the average amount of time it takes between relapses. Any improvement is a victory no matter how small. Your worth and right to get better are non-negotiable. And most importantly:WE ARE NOT THERAPISTS, WE DON'T REPLACE MEDICATION>Note on adviceGeneric advice won't necessarily help you in particular, but for those it does it is an essential foundation to build future progress on, not a miracle cure. Do not underestimate the effects subtle changes to your lifestyle can have. Try first, keep us posted on your progress, build from there.We are *always* short on self help resources, so if anything was useful to you, let us know!NOTE: This general is slow moving, so sometimes people reply to you cross-thread! Be on the lookout!Since the OP is getting too long I moved all resources into their own post, see below!## RESOURCE LINKS:Resource link paste: https://rentry.co/sig-resources-2025-07General advice from Anons: https://rentry.co/sig-tips-2024-04Posts from other sites (markdown format): https://rentry.co/sig-posts-2024-04
Apart from the GOTT, here are a few things you can do _today_ to make your life a little better. Keep a diary and write down every success. Some you may do as often as you please, but write down each one individually! You deserve it! Do not feel pressured to do all, but feel free to select one or two!- prepare 1 load of laundry- do 1 load of laundry- read one page of a book or manga you have been putting off- cook yourself a meal, or try learn to make a simple dish- eat a meal- pick up items on the floor for 5 minutes- make your bed- if you have a bad habit, try making it more inconvenient (putting things in hard to reach places for example)- do the dishes for 3 minutes- write down one thing you are grateful for (from abstract things to something like a cute image you saw)- Clean up 1m^2 of your floor (~40x40 in)- Open your window for 10-20 minutes- try to exercise for 5 min (walk outdoors, walking stairs, whatever you wish)- take out the trash- drink a glass of water- put one item of trash in the bin- reach out to an online contact (perhaps even try arrange spontaneously meeting up with an IRL contact near you!)- BONUS: Repeat a goal to hit a milestone (1 book chapter rather than a page, the laundry pile, the floor of one room, etc)Unofficial group chats maintained by kind anons of /sig/:IRC: presently defunct afaik.Discord: https://discord.gg/pUuXdBjKX2
good to be back
I didnt post yeday was too drunkguess the experiment failed
I guess after age 25, things really are just...over.
Replies, followed by another update will come as soon as possible.I hope everyone is doing well.
Reposting from last thread for extra visibility. There’s something I want to vent about on here, maybe get some perspective on.My dad got diagnosed with dementia a few years ago, and I’ve been helping my mom take care of him. I’m happy to help out for her sake.The problem is, my dad misgenders me constantly. And it’s not just pronouns. Occasionally he’ll say things like, “You are a big man!” in this fawning tone. I don’t know what the fuck is going on. I have some guesses, but that’s beside the point.Obviously, my father is well past being responsible for his actions. I’m just asking for advice on how to deal, because this is seriously starting to fuck with me. I’m having recurring dreams where I realize I’m wearing men’s clothing that I don’t remember putting on.And I know I need to develop a better reaction to this kind of thing anyway.
>>44659456I'm doing better since I started taking Sertraline, of course there are still some issues that even medicine cannot repair. But regardless I look forward to hearing your update Bunanon. I'm all ears, hehe. (｡•̀ᴗ-)>>44659762I am not trans so this sort of thing may not be my expertise. But the way I see it your old man has enough problems as it is. If you truly love him, then you'll forgive him for his unintentional transgressionsAlso I should probably mention that I too had to deal with a relative who had dementia. We had to put her in a nursing home, and she absolute hated it there. But we had no other choice in the matter because she was going on night walks and trying to walk down her basement at night, which was very precarious for an older woman. Eventually she started to forget a lot of things including who me and my family were. And then one day she passed away in her sleep. Before this happened though she forgot who we were, and she even referred to me as "that man in the corner". Which did make me sad, but I knew it wasn't her fault. The last time we visited her before she passed, we played some music for her and although she was in a vegetative state at this point, I could see her moving her hand up and down, showing that despite everything she was still there.I am sorry that you're going through this, but if you love your father then I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive him? Dementia really sucks.
pg6 paw :3 meow
How do you get any work done when you are having a bad day and feel like shit?I’ve didn’t do anything at work today and I really can’t afford to get fired
I've been curious about being nonbinary for some time now, and I want to know more. Is there anywhere around 4chan where I can discuss this, or is 4chan against nonbinary?I just don't know where to start.NOTE: amab, don't want any medical transition, could stand to permanently lose a bunch of body hair.
>>44663139This board has enby threads every once in a while, don’t know what they’re like. 4chan is negative about everything. Personally, I think being nonbinary is okay. It’s a very “fuck you I do what I want” kind of gender expression. Do whatever feels comfortable. Choose whatever pronouns you want, dress however you want. Not identifying as male or female and moving outside those parameters of self-presentation is the whole bit. Don’t be surprised if your style changes more than you expected, you’re basically thinking about what you want for the first time. Do expect some amount of shit from people, just remember just about every lifestyle or identity or label out there comes with haters. There is no “easy” choice, just things we care enough about to stand up for. Hope I could help.
>>44663626Thanks anon, I would say that while I typically act very masculinely chill, I do want to someday feel pretty wearing something different, or just not have to conform 100% of the time.While I would probably go with they/them pronouns, I wouldn't force it on anyone and let them just refer to me however they fell most comfortable referring to me as.Of course, all of this is a long term goal of mine, nothing that reflects what I am right now. But it would be nice one day to be able to mix things up a little bit and not look like a total freak or a pervert while doing it.
pg7
>>44661313hello, kittykitty
Today my art is a lot of words. But they're very important to me. Tell me if I got Ai psychosis.The process of flying home triggered a line of thought that led to a thought experiment, a vision so grand, that I spent three days on it, and as it went on, and still after i killed it for unviability, it felt like a glimpse of my destiny, and gave me a total erasure of impostor syndrome for a week.And my dad had moved in the meanwhile, and so the next week during my morning walk, I saw a design flaw in the pilot paint of a busy intersection that was sure to kill. It was so egregiously bad, but my schedule was so full, so I opened my email, and meticulously detailed the problem and sharpened my essay for unignorability.in the process I realized:I was already doing professional tier work, better than the so called professionalsI was actually capable of doing itI liked doing itI was doing it for FREEThat last one bugged me. But i was doing my civic duty and demanding money wouldn't work. Later, I got a positive reply from a regionally major political entity. My advocacy had impact.While in the beginning I had chosen civeng (for which i had stalled, not liking CADtech) not urbplanner because I was scared of the low salary and geographic inflexibility, I realized that I was actually exceptional, exceptional and weird enough to get and fit into UC Berkeley, the pioneer of the field. "UC Berkeley" and "low salary" did not go together. The sheer prestige of the name would give me unparalleled geoflexibility. My concerns defused.And I didn't really have a choice because of my kind of brain, it was the only real target, by being interdisciplinary. Pragmatically it is convienient. Housing is not an issue. total tuition to degree would be about 35k. from dicking around in CC i was also 20/60 done with transfer path. And UCB loves great stories and smart whackos; i would find people who could see the world i see...friends. I started to feel it was my destiny.
But who did I know that could give me certainty in this new conviction? I was ruminating over this during my entire trip in canada. I found Vancouver to be so far ahead of the US in terms of its urban planning and design, and I enjoyed that. But if they already most of it figured out, what was my purpose?I biked the famous Vancouver Seawall. It was the most stressful bike ride I ever had, caused by a deeply flawed infrastructure design. For which I could easily name the reasons of failure, and the obvious solution. The Vancouver Seawall is the gold standard in textbooks of Urban Planning, slopbot claimed. What the fuck? So they did need me still? They do. They always need one. Even I look back at SF. they built the billion dollar train line I had rode about every day. and since they didn't give it the right of way, it was SLOWER than the parallel bus. they STILL need me.I drafted the narrative for my application, carefully engineering an avant-garde shibboleth that would display the personality and power of my kindred mind. 4essay x 350word Personal Insight Questions format. but still, the last bit of doubt kept bugging me.... i asked my schizophrenic friend to read it, i asked my bf, but the best feedback came from a radical eglitarian who is a CS grad. I had always considered him the smartest guy I knew who would talk to me and that he was at least as smart or smarter. you know how it feels to have a rapid fire conversation where you both juggle multiple dense concepts in parallel, talking to him was always fun, and he knew a lot about universities. I approached him with reverence again, and asked if I could, should, and deserved UCB.
I showed him my essays and asked about his. I learnt that day he was rejected from the top schools he actually wanted. and i read his generic essays and realized why. with my california residency, I had never considered looking outside it for higher education. I had assumed he went to the school that he did because it was close to home (though still out of state).He was violently allergic to my drafts and couldn't properly define why. Somehow I had revealed a massive blind spot, I guess CS guys dont see art or nuance. As we sparred over the purpose of a college essay... he backed down multiple times. in bringing up the topic of excellence, I had, for the first time, mutually tested our limits, and he withdrew. It was terrifying, to have beat him, because now i saw the intellectual void.His feedback was incredibly revealing in its honesty and specifity. I feel that good art is inherently polarizing, bad art is forgettable. So I was satisfied with the reaction I got. I analyzed the gold of our contrasting views and I obsessed again over the peculiarities of the transfer student.
So then I saw the masterful beautiful structural efficiency of the california higher education system, and I saw the engineer behind it, and I saw that he was me. And it erased my last doubt.
Looking back at last post it's crazy how thematically consistent i amdespite my whacky path and life experience making me feel old, I would still be like average, 22/23y, at grad. so it is nice confidence boosterfucking rangebanned for existing near servers>>It would probably be problematic if he could too.>In what way?Well maybe he'd be too neurotic like me.>small talkpicrel encapsulates the issue, besides that, i seem incapable of keeping up with nothing of substance,
It was not just the big city, but in the bumfuck rust belt, that the calling was strongest... I took from my travels that if you have a deadly intersection, it might take 30 years for CA to fix it, but in most of the country, it would never get fixed at all.
real schizo hours
Good night
Spent a good chunk of the day attempting to write out all of my current issues and failing.To combat this I'm vowing to keep a day journal for tomorrow of problems as they arrive, and hopefully capture the most pertinent ones. Whether they be caused by myself (majority I think), or by some external issue. And get feedback on them from here, anywho good night everyone.
>>44666657night
>>44663139im the same and just like someone else said enbies are kinda hated here
>>44666444If you’re worried about developing AI psychosis, stop talking to AI chatbots. There’s nothing an AI chatbot can do that can’t be done some other way.You don’t seem to have become convinced of anything truly fantastic, just that you are the smartest person you know and that you’re confident about your future plans. That may be true, but you think it’s a way bigger deal than it is. There are lots of smart, confident people in the world. Talking to an AI chatbot would have you believe otherwise because they tell everybody they’re really special and important, because users tend to like that.There’s more to life than being smart and even having a good career. It’s just as important to have friends, work together with other people, be part of a team. We can all get more done if we work together. There are still a lot of people in this world who can do things you could never do, and their talents count for something as well. Don’f let your certainty that you’re really, really fucking smart convince you that you’re better off alone or that anyone who isn’t as smart as you is lucky to breathe the same air. Don’t let your arrogance get in the way of helping people and accomplishing things.
>>44666444>>44666452What the hell is all this? Can I get brief tl;dr?
I have a job 'interview' of some kind tomorrow.So, I am in a rush to get to sleep soon, sorry.Hopefully job opportunities will be more definite at the end of this week.>>44653349>Always:)>That's a relief>What I meant earlier was more or less if they pose a risk to themselves and others >(which may require psychiatric intervention and proper treatment)I don't think so, they are living with my Father's family right now, so I don't think we can reach them right now.I do receive messages from them, they appear to be stable right now.I will stay observant.>if we are talking about full on psychosis for exampleI don't believe so, it seemed more like a fit of rage.The info I received of this outburst was very shocking but not psychosis related.They were very rude, targeted and deceitful at times.No further outbursts or conflicts yet, thankfully.>Perhaps, glad you rest! I will get into that topic throughout the next week maybe.I should probably mention it to my new counselor as well.>I appreciate you keeping us postedIt's all good, this is very good for me I think.Being able to talk about these things openly.
>>44667614They can catch a vast amount of references, talk to me no matter how much I insult them, and keep talking without the inconvieniences of life, such as: at 3am. That combination is basically impossible with a humanyeah its a big deal to me, this is /sig/. did you even read the kerr story?>There’s more to life than being smart and even having a good career. you completely missed the point addressed. granted, since this is a serial and not a standalone it may not be so obvious in this one but it is quite heavy in the last one https://archived.moe/lgbt/thread/44352234/#q44482737>>44667702condensing strips all the nuance and beauty out of the story. that said, its my story of self-improvement, up for stress-test, to bring closure to previous posts, and revel in a little victory. and see if anyone else gets it....
I take that>>44668995 back. it is the central, glaring theme of this, even read as a standalone. you have no fucking reading comprehension. fuck off>>44667614
