i'm trying to be normal and not another trans embarrassment but i keep having intrusive thoughts about a cis les or femrepper castrating my balls. but like actually happening for real
>>44780831Imp toes....
>>44780831I fantasize about a male begging me not to. And me stomping on their balls and taking advantage of them while they're in shock but that's obviously something I can do with anyone and probably hotter in my head than real life.
>>44780902why do you want to stomp on balls nona
>>44780902I always struggle with these sorts of scenarios as a service toppeople want to be beaten and shit and I want them to get off but I just don't have it in me to hurt them. Even during regular sex I'm sometimes like "Are you good?" my limit for what I'm comfortable doing to them is just a lot lower than masochists like.
>>44780982It's like getting to the center of a tootsiepop. If I were to break someone there's nothing stopping me from seeing what they really are. Like a twisted kind of connection with them. I got this way because my parents always lied to me and belittled my opinion with religion. Using it as an excuse to abuse me. I hate lies. It's relieving. Like my entire existence is being validated in one act.>>44780984I would say I'm also a service top. It's just there are times where that's overriden. When I'm really horny.
>>44780831I've seen dykes say they want to cut someone's balls off op
>>44780831Not sure if this is weird cosmic conspiracy or coincidence that you posted this op>talking to close friend who is cis fem that wants to be a doctor>she supports me being trans>asks me if I want bottom surgery>said no because of possible complications but said I've thought of orchie so I dont have to take t blockers any more>asks me why not do it>tell her because its too expensive >tells me just let her know when and she'll figure out how and do it for free as long as I accept the small risk of dying>laughed in a wtf way cause I thought she was joking >she was seriousShe's not les or a ftmrepper though
>>44781395Um, tell her to you'll let her do it. don't miss this chance you dummy.
>>44781489Ok but What if I die,What if she changed her mind since saying thatWhat if it goes badWhat if I regret it later What if I die and she gets kicked out of med school or goes to jail Come on now...
>>44781395Proof all doctors are ontologically evil
>>44781068I think it's easier to connect with people when you don't stomp on their balls personally
