Repressor General: Cool Jellyfish editionQOTT: Have you ever been overseas?
Tranny stuff is sort of like forbidden knowledgeOnce you know this stuff it rapes your brain permanently
>>44850312I(burger) went to the UK once but it was like 15 years ago. It was perfectly sunny and like 65 degrees out for the whole week, so I feel like it wasn't very representative of the British Experience.
If I don't get cuddles soon I'm going to fucking lose it
>>44850312I've been to japan 7 times because I'm a weeb
I've been to the US and Europe. Very nice.I'm considering telling my fiancee of 2 years, gf of 10, that I've been repping the whole relationship and have asked people to call me by a girl name before and loved it. Any opinions?
Reppor fetishism. is it real?
>>44850312>QOTTMultiple times and visiting europe again later this year.
>>44850312take your HRT, retards
i cut my hair
Executive Dysfunction obliterated my life. Dysphoria doesn't even matter really.
>>44852937maybe it resulted from dysphoria ever thought of that
>>44852956At one point I was on a cocktail of drugs that fixed it but I still had dysphoria.can't take that cocktail anymore because it involved meth and It was probably bad for me (also too expensive)
>>44852937Truth, add a naturally avoidant high inhib personality and it's over.
>>44850958forcefem is the only fetish that plays into repping because if you tried to make a repper hatefuck you by questioning their masculinity they'd just start crying.
>>44850312yea I went to greece once
Not a repper anymore but that is a very cool jellyfish. Have another <3
>>44853273what made you stop repping?
>>44853273Probably not really a repper anymore either since I caved and injected a few days ago. But I've trooned and detrooned before so it's only a matter of time before my neurosis makes me stop again.
I've been on and off estrogen so many times. I inject and then stop, wait a couple of months, inject again, wait, then it repeats
>>44853330Wasn’t sure if I was going to stick with it but realized that I kept thinking about it and wanting in some way to troon out and knew that I’d spend my whole life wondering “what if” and regretting not trying it at the very least. Haven’t gone off since I started and isn’t easy (still feel like a lot shit) but feel a lot more like a real person and have actually been getting a lot happier with how I look as I keep on figuring out how to style myself and body keeps growing. Not sure I’ll ever actually pass or present as a girl but I’m happier at the very least and that’s what matters to me>>44853363That can’t be fun for u anon I’m sorry. I hope u can find some sorta peace soon
If you want to truly test a parent's love for you, tell them you're trans. Expect initial shock and disgust, but if they are still hating you months and years after the ordeal, then they probably never loved you, just the idea of you.What do you think about this idea anons? On April Fools Day, I just come out to my family members and say yeah I want to transition my gender. Show them pictures of me crossdressing even though I haven't crossdressed since 2018 as a joke, and observe their reaction.Then when the time is right, I say April Fools. Got you good. Kek.
I should be in this general but my parents trooned me out at 11. Id give anything to have repped. Life as a tranny is brootal.
>>44855172Minor correction. The time I cd'd in 2018 was not for a joke. I did it secretly. No one ever found out and desu I'm not going to tell anyone of this IRL ever. The guilt and shame were so unbearable as I wore my sister's dress and a wig lying around that I never engaged in it again. I would like to get my own clothes if I do it again (obviously)
>>44850312Passoids be like just go outside bro
>>44855197too obvious, good ragebait is supposed to be more subtle and within the range of possibility
I wish I could just stop existing
very long boy
>>44852973As someone with severe issues I'd like to know what you used, nothing I've tried did anything positive...
I will annihilate my psudeodysphoria and level up into this world's top chaser.
>>44852798HRT won't unrape or turn every into an anthro woman.
>>44856646you can yiff or whatever either way
>>44856671
nothing makes me happy like being a womanI don't know why I ever thought I could be a woman
>>44852798I did and will probably stop again in a few weeks to months like I always inevitably do.>>44853381I think once you've detrooned more than once you're forever trapped in this cycle, at least that's my experience.
>>44856646I just don't get the appeal of furry stuff personally
>>44856982t. not furpilled
>>44855990>As someone with severe issues I'd like to know what you used,Get ready budMeth(15 mg)A research chemical analogue of ritalin called 4F-MPH (or 4-fluoromethylphenidate)Strattera 80 mg On all three(yes, 2 stimulants and 1 SNRI) I was able to focus for 6 hours straight which I have never done before and have never done since. Caveats being 4F-MPH is probably neurotoxic for all I fucking know and my blood pressure was undoubtedly too high at the time . Also no idea where to source it anymore. I wouldn't recommend trying it. I was doing all sorts of dangerous stuff trying to find a solution to executive dysfunction, all kinds of dangerous drug combinations.
>think about someone treating me as woman. >feel happiness in body>penis gets hard.>disgusting.
>>44857171nigga you have autogynephila or something plain and simple just accept it lol
>>44852798I'll take it when someone forces it onto me. The only way i'm doing it btw. I'm just huffing copium.
>>44857001Sted's art drives me insane. I wish i could be her
>>44857160Stop recommending meth to people.
>>44857001yeah no, not judging I just don't understand
>>44857160Stimulants made my executive function worse in the long run.
half of me wishes the psychotic episode I had a few months ago was enough to get me to finally start E after nearly two decades of repressing, to quit my job, focus completely on my health and transition for a while, and to work towards a better futureand the other half of me wants me to relapse completely all of my worst habits with the "new and different" world of warcraft thing, become really depressed, just like every other time I've played that shit game, and then skip to the end of things in a couple years when I reach the point where I can't get out of bed except for work and mythic raid, if I don't die from something else first.the most likely outcome is that I will continue to do nothing and end up with the worst of all of these above.
>>44856942Sorry did I say weeks to months, that hon thread convinced me to quit now. Throwing out the vial iwnbaw.
>>44858230None of us ever will bewwnbw, if you will
>>44858092what does a psychotic episode feel like? I sometimes feel close to one but nothing ever happens
>>44858702Trvth
>>44850312>QOTT: Have you ever been overseas?No, I would love to however I don't leave my house for months at a time. I don't think I could handle traveling if I find even going to the grocery store nerve-racking.
>>44858795I don't know if it was really a psychosis, but it sure was something. It was an entire month of being unable to think about much else besides wanting to transition, of believing that with enough work I'd look alright. Lots of exhausting and irrational ungrounded thoughts. I was getting stress headaches every night.
>>44859058That's not psychosis. I had a small psychotic break where I believed people I had known for years were suddenly nothing but hallucinations and I was not who I thought I was.
>>44859063What was it then? When enough time had passed, my thoughts of transitioning again seemed so irrational and unreal, that I almost wondered if I'd had them at all.
>>44859088Dysphoric flare up, actual psychosis involves breaking from reality to the point where you're unable to tell what's real or not.
>>44859058oh, that's just normal + some delusional hope>>44859063that's what I was thinkin of
>>44850312I have been overseas only once to the Bahamas for about a day. Barely counts since it's a stone's throw away from Miami.I've also been to Canada twice. It's been a few years but I really enjoyed it. I've traveled through a good portion of the U.S. but Montreal and Toronto were both nice cities. The latter kinda feels like Chicago if it was in the first world (though it's probably since been inundated with Indians as I was last there in... 2019?).
>>44859058that's me 24/7
I'm fine until I see a guy with a cute butt and then I'm angry and envious
every time one of you throws a vial i get angry wishing i could have ut, but i think that's because i'm not only faketrans but a fakerepper as well.
just be gay
just be fey
just be fem
>>44850312my new years resolution this year was to go overseas at least 6 times... ive done that so... its fun...everyone in the office bullies me now and asks where i went whenever i take a day or more off :p
>>44859874i hate you so much charlotte i swear to god I'll pin you down and slit your throat so i can drink the estrogen off your blood until i become a real wombyn
>>44856942>I think once you've detrooned more than once you're forever trapped in this cycle,I'm definitely trapped hahI was supposed to inject yesterday but I didn't do it.Now I'm looking at trans pornstars and seething.I can't help but resist myself
OOO i MISSED my injection! i threw away my vial! i just detrooned for the 15th time this month! i haven't girlmoded once-- that's basically repping, right? foids take EVERYTHING from young sensitive men like us, even repping... you will NEVER be a real man, faggot.
>>44859919I've been doing this off and on for years and I look the same. You can't transition off one injection every 6 months.
>>44859893why do u hat me :( im an ugly manmoder im not exactly cool enough to get hate
>>44859919Am I suddenly a foid just because I injected estrogen once after months of stopping? Come on now.
I wanna OD on heroin that seems like the way to go.
>>44859730Being gay doesn't fix crippling AvPD
>>44860137I want to destroy my brain with a shotgun or a rifle or a hydraulic press
>>44860146I really wonder how much of the actively repping general population has that. I also check off the boxes for it.
>>44860163based
>bread didn't rise with the yeast that rose a week agocut my dough into piecesthis is my new flat bread
>>44860197It would definitely make sense. One of the big indicators of AvPD is extreme fear of negative evaluation by your peers. You're not going to transition if you believe people are going to perceive you negatively because of it. Fucking can't stand pinkpillers who just tell us to do it and not care what others think. As if some of us don't have other underlying mental conditions that are stopping us. It's like telling someone with BPD that they should just try being more emotionally stable...
>>44860507Or a depressive to just cheer up
Even if I lived alone and never interacted with other people I still would not like transitioning. It's like I shouldn't have to do this, why can't I just be happy with myself? Why do I need drugs to be happy? Why do I need to do all this shit? I don't want to inject drugs. I hate injections. I hate being dependent on stuff. I hate not being myself (In my mind I am a man, not a woman)Fuck this anons!!!!!!!11
woke up in the middle of the night last night feeling unbearably ass-horny despite being a lowkey homophobic troonrepper
My large penis and ballsack makes me sadinb4 angry FTM repper.
imma do trade work
>>44860803I want to inject drugs (heroin)
Take your HRT (Hennessy, Rum, and Tequila)
How many of you are 100% convinced you're trans? I'm not, maybe 70% or so. Maybe I don't belong in these threads.
>>44865458I'm 100% trans, but transness has many different presentations.
>>44865458I'm 100% faketrans, but i have a very broad and forgiving personal conviction about who should and shouldn't transition. If a 1:1 clone of me told me they wanted to transition I'd support them, but I mentally can't bite the bullet. I just don't have the willpower.
>>44865713Can you elaborate?>>44865747Same. But putting aside transition, I just don't have the willpower for most things.
>>44865458I err on the side of being faketrans, as I only actively started wanting to be a woman and repressing that fact in the past few years, and especially once I realized I was losing my youthful looks and hair. That being said, I've always wanted to be someone else, just no one more specific than that. The only tells I can think of as a kid include not liking my picture or body hair after puberty; aside from that, though, I mostly just kinda accepted looking like an autistic fuck for a while. I was the kid who wore a hoodie and jeans all year round.
>>44865458I have some kind of damage or illness that makes me think I'm trans when I'm not. I'm not really dysphoric it just hurts a shit ton when I look in the mirror and see the disgusting meat prison I'm trapped inside. When I think about how there were signs as early as 12, it must be selection bias or false memory. Maybe some kind of brain washing from watching so much trans content on social media, or from playing almost all female characters in online games since the mid 2000s. I remember writing a blog post in 2009 about wanting to transition, but it was never scraped by the internet archive, and I don't have any backups of it, and now I'm unsure if it was ever real, or another delusional fantasy I made up because I falsely thought I was a repressing tranny. I used to wear my hair really long, but there are no photos of myself from that time. I truly believe that trans women are women, but I am no one, nothing...
>>44859919TRVTH NVKE
>>44865458I'm 50/50 on it. Not sure if I'm actually trans or just a mentally deranged cis man as I flip between both possibilities constantly.
>>44850312No. And I don’t understand pooners. If you truly had a male brain you’d just deal with having tits and a vagina and shut the fuck up. Every single ftm I’ve met plays the ukulele and cries. Why are you not shooting animals and building? Shut up and be a real man. You can cut your tits off when you know how to change your cars oil.
>>44865458everyone here is trans, quit coping
>>44865458I wasn't but also looking back at the signs I think I might be actually retarded in some way.33y/o
>>44867296>when you know how to change your cars oilDads/grandads should be teaching all their kids this desu. Actual waste of money to pay for someone else to do it no matter your gender. I got taught this shit when I got my license and I suggest everyone learns too. If teenage me can do it you can too.
>>44865458I'm definitely not because I did transition and was unhappy mostly, but it was also the only time I've ever been happy as opposed to suffering neutral. 25% belief I'm trans but I'd only ever be unsuccessfully trans
>>44867882I can't even drive despite being in my 20s
>>44867982My parents literally forced me to Honestly I think they were right to. The only reason I got a boyfriend was because I could offer to drive him to school and we could be alone together. Your parents failed you desu.
>>44867296Yeah, because no man has ever cried or played an instrument
>>44868050It's not as if they haven't tried, but my drive and motivation to do anything but the most basic of self care and survival needs has all but dried up years ago.
>>44868068>t. autistic taking things too literally
>>44868080Yeah they should have done it when you were like 13 and still had gumption. Since you are an adult it might just be all up to you at this point. Sucks but it's the hands we are dealt ig.
You wanna be a man huh? Buzz that girly hair off your head and take that shit off your face. Man up little bitch. Turn into a disgusting ogre and see how you like it
My shrink told me i need to talk to my parents about my interests more because they are the only people I have to talk to irl and im too reserved with them. She told me not to worry about how my interests are cringe and that they won't understand it, its about me and I need to get comfortable expressing myself. So I showed my mum Umamusume and she told me it was sexist and she handed my phone back to me immediately.
What a fucking waste. Having to see such a horrific tragedy really does confirm how evil the world is
what the heck keeps you all alive
>>44868191cowardice
alcohol
all the high iq women i ever saw irl were not feminists whatsoever, so it seems to be an average/low iq thing
>>44868188>Listening to a shrinkngmi>>44868193>>44868196Same
suffering never ends
>>44868191Cute anime girls. Ill never be one, but i can still enjoy looking at them. Have a hug larry
>>4486545890 percent sure It would be an act of denial to pretend im not Trans, but there are many days I feel incredibly manly in a good way
>>44865458ive been on hormones for over a year and im still only like 50% sure if you feel more confident about it than me you should hurry up and do it already tbqh
if I was born in the middle east without internet access I could have just joined ISIS to die a glorious death for allah instead of having the safety to spend every single day consciously agonizing over this shit
what's even the point of torturing me like this
I had another dream last night friends. This time I was dating a short balding Japanese man with a flat ass and a tiny penis. And I was really happy. He would cuddle me and play with my butt and tell me how he wished he had a round butt like me instead of a flat ass. I think I'm now at that stage where I'm starting to have fantasies about dating people in my league instead of fantasies about being a cute anime girl dating another cute anime girl.
>>44868553Sounds nice. I only fantasize about blowing my brains out.
>>44865458I'm just a AGP ROGD cis maleNo matter how much I looked or behaved like one, I would never be able to actually see myself as a womanI know what I am; a man disillusioned with life. And nothing will ever change that
>>44868553I havent dreamed in over 14years due to excessive daily Cannabis abuse.If you dream you are Not a repper
I'm a soup repressor. I repress but I also enjoy a variety of different soups.
>>44868818Does weed actually do that, every time I've slept while high it's given me really bizarre vivid dreams.
>>44868820also known as a soupressor
>>44868191food, oxygen, water, and a barely functioning body
>>44868818I've never smoked weed in my life. I've always had very vivid dreams a few times a month. I get sleep paralysis, seizures and chronic migraine as well. I think my brain is just fucked and I'm gonna have a stroke at 40.
giwtwm
I wanna be a cute anime boy
i wasted my whole 20s being afraid and disgusted with myself, idk what to do now
I am super sexually frustrated as a repressor because I hate touching my dick and I don't like putting things in my ass.
>>44865458I really don't know. I remember finding a gender bender manga in middle school and wishing it was me but I never acted on it out of fear of my parents and what they'd do to me. I think I just wanted to be a girl because I had a crush on my best friend for the longest time but I could never act on it or tell anyone because everyone around me hated gay people. I thought having gay sex would make me feel better so I went and fucked some random faggot on grindr, but all it did was make me feel violated and even more like a freak. Gay sex felt unnatural and I began to envy women for having a literal designated fuckhole. I don't know if it's agp or not but eventually I just wanted to be a normal girl living a normal life. I forgot about that dream for a while until my friend got a gf and for some godforsaken reason told me that she was the girl version of me. That broke me and the dysphoria has been getting worse and worse since. I just want to be a normal girl living a normal life, not some anime bombshell or agp shit. Too bad god finds our existence funny, the bastard.
>>44869355it was boku girl
Haven't had a real orgasm in more than a year probably.No idea why but cumming just doesn't even feel satisfying anymore, it just feels like peeing but with slightly more pressure. I can barely get hard on top of that. When I was really in love with a girl when we were 17 my dick measured just a millimetre or so below 18 centimetres. Nowadays my "erections" barely reach 12 centimetres in length. This fucking sucks. It'd be nice to just be able to experience an orgasm once in a while, even if touching a dick that is attached to my own body feels off.>>44869012>idk what to do nowCan't give you any advice but I'm following your footsteps. I'm turning 25 early next year and I literally haven't done anything since turning 18 than staying at home cuz of covid lockdowns, studying, and waging. No fun, nothing, just rotting in my room.>>44865458I'm never going to troon out cuz even that won't make me a woman obviously, but I always felt like I was a woman trapped inside a body of a man.Even when I was a lil' kid at like the age of 7 or 8, all my friends were girls and I would only spend time with them and not with guys. Actually I was the only guy who got invited to the girls' birthday parties kek. I can't help but wonder how much of a pussy magnet I would have ended up being, if being born a normal male.
My mother once told me that there was a period when I was a young kid where I would only respond to "puppy" and would act like a dog. I guess its in my very nature to want to pretend to be things which I could never possibly be.
>Trump said he's creating a government agency to track down and forcibly transition all repressorsguys im so scared...this literally repper genocide
>>44869355>I just want to be a normal girl living a normal life, not some anime bombshell or agp shitThis :(Idc if I become a femcel, just LET ME BE FEM FFS
>>44868359That's the thing, I'm not. 70% was kind of a lie from me. It is more like 50%
Today I spent almost the entire day in bed looking at porn while having a vibrator in my ass and now suddenly post-clarity hits me hard and I want to kill myself
>>44868196Alcohol is still relatively a new pursuit of mine. Porn and video games have been the lifeline but at this point I find them not fulfilling anymore. It's crazy how much effort I used to put into quitting porn only to fail every time. Now I actually have no interest in it and have no desire to seek it out. I think it's been a week and a half since I jerked off, the urges are just not there anymore. This has been at least one good side effect of gender dysphoria. Tell all the people on NoFap that this is the way to do it kek.
I quit drinking and replaced it with sleeping as my main cope.
Where are you on this chart? (top to bottom axis is desired body type)
>>44870741Bottom right, but not polycule
>>44870741I want a traditional wife and children loli
>>44870741Bottom left centrist
>>44869012Me too It's probably over
>>44870741right in the middle as i just want to be a normal single woman
>>44870741x = -50 y = 0
Do you guys ever use lifting and self improvement stuff as a cope? I think a decent amount about that one quote from skyrim where he's like “is it better to be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?” Like even though I was born a rapist I can still try and accomplish stuff and make the people around me happy. maybe im faketrans idk
>>44865458Define what "trans" and prove to me that it's a real thing and I might consider it.
Any Jewish reppers into German trans men itt? Let me hit that.
>>44872243i hope the afd gets your ass
>>44872473I'm German, why would they care about me
i'm going to fucking lose iti've decided i'm going to tell my parents when i'm back for winter breakit's not going to go well but fuck it
>>44872677>winter break>implying your still in schoolJesus christ do it
>>44872952i suppose i have to commit to it now ;_; didn't get dubs for no reason
>>44872677You don't have to tell anyone anything.I've taken hrt for 9 years and my dad hasn't figured it out, I live with him too.
>>448730429 years and you didnt get visible breast buds?did you take prog or pio?is he lobotomized? or demented?
>>44873149I don't have "breast buds" I have fully developed breasts atp...He thinks I'm fat (which isn't entirely wrong I'm like 26 BMI...)He's not retarded he's just not looking for it so he can't see it.
If I come out I fear I will become an agent of chaos in the lives of family, friends, and coworkers. As I am now, I am invisible. A minor blip on everyone's radar at best. I think a few of my siblings have a feeling that something's up with me, but you'd have to pay me a million dollars to make me spill my actual feelings. It doesn't help that the 'tism makes it so that communicating feelings and emotions is impossible. I don't want to be an agent of chaos who gets hated on. I'm already too much of a people-pleaser, risk averse, timid, etc.
>>44870741i'm a normal middle-aged woman (centrist)
i'd rather get to start over as a child, wiping all of my memory, than just transition. i will never get over this jaded self that that was born from decades of this miserable shit, there's no saving this corpse now, only by starting over
God, I hate my family, they want to force a haircut again to look “professional”. Fuck, what’s wrong with being a long haired guy. I’m gotta get another few months of wearing hats and suffering from severe dysphoria.
>>44873673Fuck looking professional, j*bs aren't even real
>>44873673I'm sorry anon :(
>>44873673Man up and buzz that mop off your head sonny
qott: yea, to a beach in los cabos. pretty nice place.4tran lgbt server for reppers who want to troon out and/or make friends:https://discord.gg/lostcord
I dont think I'll ever know what i am. I think im FTM but I don't relate to pooners at all. Despite this, i have all the worst traits of the pooner. I fucking despise men and would rather die than be in a real relationship with one & yet i am a gay porn addict. I'm autistic & have very boyish special interests (trains, rome, ww2). I'm the only foid at my job. I dont pass and women are uncomfortable around me. I call myself butch because that's what I look like, but I'm not a lesbian, at least not for cis women. I want a trans gf that has the same interests as me but it seems right now that MTFs especially hate FTMs. So even if i do transition itll be into the least favorite of the trannies. I dont know how to accept that i am just a fat femcel who will never ever ever ever ever ever ever be loved.Pic is my favorite train
>>44873972Why don’t you shave your head and grow a beard then? I accept that IWNBAW but that doesn’t mean that I have to be disgustingly.
>>4487316826 bmi is a healthy woman's BMI and not all that high for a guy either. Seems like it'd be pretty noticeable...
>>44874382because that's gross and I don't want toyou do have to be disgustingly, it's the only way we can be
>>44850380I love Lumity! Are you more like Luz, or more like Amity, nona?
Hello /repgen/ I haven't posted here in a while. I didn't have what it takes, and it would've been dishonest if I did.Years ago, I reached a breaking point, an age where I decided it was time to flip a coin and either off myself or troon out. And the coin landed on heads, so I kept on living. I made the endo appointment. I took the meds. I took the leap, but figuratively instead of literally.It was... hard. Very hard. Hell, it still is. There's still a lot of things I need to do to pass better, there's still things I don't like about my body, and there's still things about HRT and coming out that weren't fully worth it. But if I had to do a balance? I'd say for me at least, it was worth it. And it will continue to be worth it, even if I was a mega lateshit already by the time I came out. The best time to start HRT is before puberty. The second best time to start HRT was yesterday. The next best time to start HRT is ASAP.It won't be easy, it won't be a fairytale, and it will suck. But it sucks way less than feeling miserable all day every day because you're actively repressing one of the biggest parts of yourself.I genuinely wish you all the best, whichever path you take, I still hold you all very dear for the times and camaraderie we shared, even if it was through anonymity.
just jack off after working out, it fixes 100% of your AGP urges for 24 hours.
can someone post the john 50 articlei wanna read it againthyink its cause i ordered a vial finallyeven though i'm not sure i want itits shit its fuckign awful i can't live anymore i think about going over the footbridge i use on my commute evrydaybut i digressmaybemaybe it gets better
>>44873042if i come out i have a chance at getting hrt soon (20)if i don't then most likely i have to wait until i am 22 and have my own job and place
>>44874798that usually just makes me feel disgusting and want to kms even more
>>44872677i wish i did at your age>>44873168i think you are the retard, retard.
>>44875260I guess I will thenAlso agreed your dad has definitely noticed he just doesn't want to stir up anything
3 day tolerance break OVER
>>44873168if you were a true repper you'd post them because it's just a man's chest right?