>grow up in small rural town>peculiar interest in trans/crossgender stuff since 7 years old>watched nyc drag pageant with a lot of passing transwomen online>unable to articulate what was so compelling about all of this>knew I was different so I kept this to myself>puberty comes and all my fantasies involve me being a woman/passing troon>have one fantasy where I run a criminal empire as a transwoman and make my guy underlings have sex with me>crossdress in private>force myself to fap to cis women>date a few women over the course of 10 years>never was a "ladies man" but somehow could still attract women>these relationships fizzled out because of the tranny thoughts>eventually get the courage to get dolled up and go out>it's fun>end up seeing a guy and finally bottoming>my worry was that I would stroke until completion while he was still fucking me and I'd get crazy pnc panic>pnc panic does not happen>in fact it was so enjoyable that we went two more times that night>now can only get off to the idea of being a passing vers bottom troonat this point in my life 90%+ of my sexual fantasies have involved me being a passing troon. anyone been here before? what can i actually do?
not a joke btw
>>44866501well, how do you feel about it outside of the context of sex? if its just sex then maybe you can crossdress and bottom sometimes and be happy and comfortable, but based on this it doesnt sound like you can change/deny almost all of your sexual fantasies. its been persistent for so long and its affected your relationships. if it bothers you then id genuinely think youd need therapy to try to suppress that, but if youre comfortable with it then it seems like youre finding yourself, and although thats scary, its ok.
>>44866501what do you consider successful repression?you could simply not do any of that and wait until you eventually die
>>44867208the thing is even when it is sex I don't actually like seeing myself because I want breasts and a more feminine body. i guess i feel like I'm at a spot where it could be either way and while it's a very small chance, i wonder if anyone else has had a very similar background so I can see what, if anything, worked for them.>>44867220to rep and feel excited about waking up when i wake up
>>44866501>describes lifelong textbook gender dysphoria >mentions trying very hard to make it go away>clearly never able to make it go away>describes exact scenario outlining how she couldn’t fight it>"so anons, do you think I can make it go away? do you think I can fight it?">MFW
>>44866501Just transition are you stupid
>>44868046I just feel weird because it's so sexual. But I don't know if I've just repped so long and hard because of where I grew up that I've just forced it into that outlet by accident.>>44868113sometimes yes I am very much
>>44866501Marry a woman and have kids mr man!
>>44866501All normal straight guys have these thoughts. Completely normal. Go get a wife and Kids and consider yourself cured! Congrats on your new life OP!
???get a wife n kids man no time for this weird shit lol youre fine
>>44871180I’d need Viagra for that>>44871239But what are my options though?>>44871260I’d probably end up getting divorced because of loss of interest and lose half my net worth
A G P
>>44869526it feels sexual because when you get sexual it involves your body & your mind and body are disconnected
>>44866501>sucessful>repno. stopped reading
