>>44920852
Iwnbaw(olf)

>>44920852
i look like ts

>>44920852
nigga this board is full of reppers too

Nope.

>>44920852
Yea we are all deeply mentally ill. Stop kicking us while we are down. you are just a mean cruel person

More people should try HRT just for fun actually.

>>44920852
true in my case as a cism on e, i'm an autopederast who misses the sexual attention they got at 12-14 y/o and got on hrt only to stave off further masculinization, not because i ever really wanted to be a girl

>>44920852
Yes. The ones who crossdress and stuff and expect to one day pass are giga peters. My goal with taking HRT is to defeat my agp, become a man, and get off hrt forever.
t. Cis Man on HRT

>>44920852
im a cis man on hrt and i do it because im gay and want to be a woman

>>44921219
i only ask because im concerned i may be this.
>>44921240
okay maybe im not this as much as i thought. i do kinda miss my qualities from when i was 18 but if i could mature into looking like a woman thatd be great. but im kinda old now so i have to settle for gyno man. not a bad deal but still not ideal.
>>44921242
hope that works out for you? for me if anything its making it worse. before i was not super agp but now i am. maybe hrt is bad for me.
>>44921338
>want to be a woman
not a cis man, youre a repper.

>>44920852
as someone too scared to transition, i take hrt to stay looking young and like it when people assume i'm younger than i am despite being in my 30s

>>44921371
tbhon i would prefer to have people say i look like a woman.

>>44920852
Yes. The majority of trannies have Peter Pan Syndrome as well.

>>44921242
Wtf is a gigapeter

>>44921370
>i only ask because im concerned i may be this.
oh ok, im sorry for snapping at you then. I thought you were just being judgey

>>44921370
most actual transsexual autopederasts tend to be femboys or nonbinary in one way or another, i think it's chill as long as they aren't hurting anyone. going on hrt is the only sustainable option, same as why all agp's should transition

>>44921447
Someone who suffers from an extreme level of Peter Pan Syndrome, kind of like a gigahon is a billion times worse than a hon.
>>44921370
>hope that works out for you? for me if anything its making it worse.
Sometimes it feels like it's getting worse, but sometimes it feels like it's getting better. I think I can hope to get off HRT and perma detroon within the next 2-3 years (6-8 worse case scenario).

As a cismoid not on e i am a retarded manchild and have no money or anything. Stopped going outside because evryone is too mean. I'm gonna sit it out until it's time to kill myself.

>>44921611
gonna tell you from experience rn cis moid, if youre not man enough to live life youre not man enough to kill yourself. survival instinct is a motherfucker and 90% of suicide methods are too risky to go through with. just try your best to enjoy time on this earth. whether that means becoming paul bunyan or a nancy faggot queer is up to you.
>>44921456
its okay i am pretty judgey and need to work on that.
>>44921491
the whole "agps should transition" think has to be a massive meme

>>44920852
yes. ive never had a gap in my dosage, but undeniably i feel that my difficulty functioning and inability to emotionally regulate in day-to-day life after i moved away for university and the nearly constant distress and unactionable longing for a return to the less-horrible life a child is at least partially behind my desire to take hrt and not masculinize further. it sucks but i dont know what i can do about it, ive tried to quit before but noticing new body hair starting to grow made me so distressed i had a panic attack and had to go to urgent care, so i haven't tried since. i guess this is just my life.
>t. cis man on hrt for four years

heard yall were talking SHIT
jk but
>seeing how the famous cis man on hrt quit hrt because he couldnt afford a phone and relies on his parents in his mid 20s spooked me. is this what theyre all like?
what job am i supposed to get when the only opening is working retail at the only store here? also i can’t move out so easily because i’m stuck in a reservation, compound that with parents who too old and don’t care about the outside world, i am basically stuck here. as for the apathy thing, yeah. tbf i haven’t really seen much progress other than breast buds forming and getting sensitive nipples (i was only about three or so months on eV, 4mg? every 5 days).
>inb4 just work at your retailer!!!!!!!111!!!
yeah, sorry. i’d rather die after hearing the stories about shitty customers and long hours doing nothing at the register. there’s also the fact that i’m going to see people whom i’ve burnt bridges with and i’d rather avoid that

>>44921569

You're going to take HRT for 2 or 3 more years.... to detroon?

Do you know what's going to happen to you in that time frame?

>>44921683

The only way for AGPs to ever stop shitting up queer spaces online with their insanity is to transition though, it's inevitable. It's like servere autists trying to get a job and be independant. That can't not be the goal of their lives, because we live in a society based on the idea of becoming an adult.

These "AGPs" cannot just get a haircut, enroll in community College and get a job. There's no force that can compel them to do that. And we don't want to pay the cost of pushing them onto the streets to live in squalor.

>>44921719
>what job am i supposed to get when the only opening is working retail at the only store here?
just apply. see if your parents have any friends with businesses, yardwork or work at someone with an open position.
>i’d rather die after hearing the stories about shitty customers and long hours doing nothing at the register.
this is what seperates the boys from the men. ive had to work jobs i was too good for and not paid enough at but did it because i needed the money while i looked for something better. thats part of being an adult, making ends meet. also as someone who worked retail, they can get really mad at you if youre just standing around. if its a corporation they will make sure you have something to do, no matter how asinine.
>there’s also the fact that i’m going to see people whom i’ve burnt bridges with and i’d rather avoid that
this is tough so i get it. how long ago did this stuff happen? maybe you can make amends?
>>44921769
you dont value human life at all do you?

>>44921371
lol im similar but my bdd combined with agp refuses to let me take the W whenever i get compliments because i still feel gross and masculine

im a cis man on HRT and i do in order not to age like a man, idk if you would classify this as peter pan, my life is otherwise pretty in order
what do you do it for if not that?

>>44921877
my girlfriend likes it

>>44921879
huh?

>>44921888
>what do you do it for if not that?
because my girlfriend likes it

>>44921898
she came up with the idea or what? is your girlfriend trans?

>>44921877
>im a cis man on HRT and i do in order not to age like a man, idk if you would classify this as peter pan
tbhon idk either. my life isnt completely fucked up but i am pretty emotionally stunted. im doing my best to fix it though. im just trying to see if this is a symptom of peter pan syndrome because i feel the same as you.

>>44921801
>just apply. see if your parents have any friends with businesses, yardwork or work at someone with an open position.
yeah, it’s either work at the store or work at the school</3 my mom wanted me to become a hallway monitor
>this is what seperates the boys from the men. ive had to work jobs i was too good for and not paid enough at but did it because i needed the money while i looked for something better
respect, i could never. i’m not putting myself through that hell for a few extra bucks, knowing that this is likely the most i’ve ever done with my life. i could also apply for college, it’d be an excuse to get away for a couple months and have an easier time with getting a job and maybe paying for hormones too
>how long ago did this stuff happen?
that was about… four or three years ago? i simply removed everyone from my friend list one day and stopped logging into that specific account because i wanted to start transitioning and all that stuff. since then, i’ve started having dreams about being back in high school with them. i hate it because most of them involve us simply hanging out and being teenagers again
>maybe you can make amends
nahhh, i think it’s a bit too late for that. everyone’s grown up and doing their own things now. hell, a couple of them even have children and a family now.

>>44921906
she is. we met at a co-op party when i was in undergrad. i like to dress androgynously and she told me it would make me look cuter and my clothes look better on me and that she would take care of buying and giving it to me. it's been a couple years; i guess i'm ambivalent about it, it has upsides and downsides. she's been a lot handsier since though which is nice :p she's very nice to me.

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>peter pan syndrome
aging past 30 objectively fucking sucks lol

>>44921981
>for a few extra bucks
dude you are literally giving up the sex hormones you want because you cant afford them.
>knowing that this is likely the most i’ve ever done with my life
i know i called you out for being in your mid 20s but theres so much more growth to be had. you have to get a job and stuff but you can work your way up. if not career wise, at least with your own accomplishments.
>i could also apply for college, it’d be an excuse to get away for a couple months and have an easier time with getting a job and maybe paying for hormones too
work study is pretty cherry, if you dont have to worry too much about tuition id say give it a go. please dont take out a loan ever.
>i simply removed everyone from my friend list one day and stopped logging into that specific account because i wanted to start transitioning and all that stuff. since then, i’ve started having dreams about being back in high school with them. i hate it because most of them involve us simply hanging out and being teenagers again
this sounds less like burning bridges and more like moving on with your life. maybe you guys werent that close but im willing to bet theyre more curious about what youre up to than mad at you.
>nahhh, i think it’s a bit too late for that. everyone’s grown up and doing their own things now. hell, a couple of them even have children and a family now.
then they certainly wont hold onto whatever beef they might have from four years ago.
>>44922011
this probably has some massive caveot but this is like a reppers wet dream.
>>44922089
so does working jobs you hate but you just gotta do it. trannies get old too.

>>44922135
the massive caveat is that the relationship has a half-life :p im probably moving away next year for phd and she's stuck in a dead end job and likes the city we're in, so
also i know it sounds suspect but im not a repper i dont really want a woman's social role

>>44922237
thats a tough one, also sorry for acting like it was awesome. to anyone who doesnt wanna be a woman that is actually a really shitty situation, having someone change who you are to fit their ideal. its especially bad when youre rewarded for it. so youre really ambivalent about hrt? how are you gonna feel about it if you break up? gonna regret it at all?

>>44922283
it's sort of hard to qualify the parts i like and don't like and feel ambivalent about. the libido reduction is generally nice, i dont get much body hair, and i think i look nicer - my hips and butt are bigger than they used to be. i get a little more attention. occasionally hugboxers or inobservant pedestrians mistake me for a woman and treat me politely (at least, i think that's it? people hold doors open for me a lot more than they used to).
i could take or leave wanting to cry instead of getting mad when someone yells at me. the only real persistent downside for me is that i can't take my shirt off in front of other people lol. i sort of figured i could just go to a doctor and tell them i have gyno and get keyhole if it ever really really started to bother me. i guess hooking up will be awkward in the future. im not good at being social so i hadn't really had a girlfriend before her since high school and she's very cuddly and nice to me and i was lonely and needed that. im not sure if im going to get off of it. maybe stop for a while and see how i feel? im not looking forward to growing chest and arm hair...

>>44920852
I feel like all the ones who do it for this reason are already sociopathic and not the majority.

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>>44920852
I do, a 100%
I was never a twink althought I miss looking 18, the issue is that I spent 3 years of hs completely shut down and no matter how much I tried to fix it it never worked out, I also have to rely on my parents to do everything and her being clingy and using me as an emotional replacement for my father doesn't help.

I've never had a girlfriend, I have no irl and one discord friend which I'm really glad to have, I can't drive and have to use a bicycle to get somewhere if I don't want to use the slow public transport or pester my mom to drive me somewhere.

I can't do it, do you think I haven't tried? driving schools, community colleges, normal university when I was younger, minimum wage jobs (the customer facing ones which could help me develop actual human being skills ALWAYS reject me), moving out for away and failing miserably. Nothing ever works, I even fumbled my first doordash deliveries on you guessed, my trusty rocinante (bicycle haha).

As for the hrt, it's given my hairline back and sore engorged nipples which I don't care about, I'll never transition into a woman even if I want to really badly and I wish I was born as a woman to be able to express myself as a quirk chungus person
>you're a repper and not cis and now you're a woman :)
I look like a fucking man, 100 percent, pretending I could even be a woman is a cruel joke in reality and a fantasy I only save for ai chat rp's with characters that can't know how I look irl.

>>44922505
one day your problems will be solved

>>44922520
they won't get done on their own, rn I'm on the throwing darts phase to see which job will take my ass and doing deliveries to pay for the cheap hrt, I'm lucky that is otc in my country

>>44922135
>dude you are literally giving up the sex hormones you want because you cant afford them
i’d rather that than work in fucking RETAIL where i’d be exposing myself to people who i absolutely despise. these people are fucking animals who will make fun of you for being even slightly different than they are. this goes for the people i ghosted too. they are rez, they are ghetto, they will call you a faggot and possibly beat you up if/once they find out that you’re not cishet. i’m sorry to go off on you but i am sooo tired of people assuming that i’m surrounded with level-headed and reasonable people. i’m not. i am by myself. i have to navigate through this dumb shit alone because no one understands me (speaking like a trve emo). they and everyone else gets upset when i don’t have an answer to the formula that they never taught me. again, i’m sorry for the outburst, but i’m tired of holding this in. you know what’s even worse? i have an unopened vial of estrogen in my drawer but can’t use it without having a needle. i hate how helpless i am because i don’t know what i’m doing
>inb4 teach yourself faggot!!!!1!!1!1!1!1!1!1!!1!
okay, how? where do i start?
>you should’ve known this already!!!!!1!1!!1
fuck off. it’s always “fuck you, i got mine” with you people

>>44922646
don't be a fucking faggot and use the needle, 1ml 13mm insulin, upper outer part of your butt, it doesn't matter if you manage to hit muscle just jam it in and press slowly

>>44922686
>don't be a fucking faggot
n-no

>>44921683
I could do it

>>44922686
nigga WHAT NEEDLE???? i genuinely have anything other than the unopened vial here dude

>>44922451
thats a real tough situation. fwiw your problems sound external, which isnt the worst situation to be in at all. if you end up splitting give yourself some time to recover and dont date for awhile. get one sleazy hookup out of your system if you must but please stay safe.
>>44922459
elaborate?
>>44922505
being ugly doesnt stop you from being a repper, it just makes you pragmatic for not wanting to take on a label that will shock and appall in conjunction with your appearance.
>>44922646
maybe you were never cut out for hrt. that or your priorities are way out of whack. also customers are brainless goyim dont give them any mind. that sounds about right for the injuns though lol. i guess look elsewhere from the grocery store.

>>44921733
Not like estrogen is going to do anything. Even if I was a tranny, I would be super lateshit (hrt at 20, currently 22)

>>44923012
hrt at 20 is still early lateshit, it's not gigalateshit yetttttt. purely hypothetically if you were a tranny of course, which you're not because you're super unique and special

>>44922988
you could’ve replied with
>fuck you i got mine
and it would’ve been more constructive than what you actually said lmfao. also idc if i’m not cut out for it. people call me faketrans and the opposite anyway and that isn’t enough to make me want to stop. i will continue injecting once i find the funds because fuck you and everyone else on this god forsaken basket weaving forum

>>44923038
>you could’ve replied with
>>fuck you i got mine
what do you mean? what have i gotten?

yee

>>44921239
I did this and a tranny here called me a sick pervert

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>>44923474

>>44922731
go to any pharmacy and ask the clerk lady for an insuling needle
>which one SIR?
1ml 13mm, if they don't have that ask for an 8mm one but make sure it's one 1ml so that extracting the estradiol oil doesn't become a chore

>>44922459
dude I wish I was a competent sociopath

>>44922646
>>44922731
if you're on the rez in Canada there are probably at least one of those free clean needle programs for druggies, you just gotta make your eyes space out and master the fent walk

>>44920852
wait, the "i'm a cis man on hrt" guy just stopped? like that?
t.cisguy on hrt who's obviously stunted in his 20s who's just doing it for comestic reasons, taking a "gap year" from uni while he's (not) looking for a job, relies on parents.

>>44925298
ye i stopped bc im poorfag this month and have communication issues. i’ll start again once i find the money tho (in a few days)
>>44925047
thank you i was also considering just walking into my nursing station and asking for a couple needles

>>44925324
damn, sucks, that's probably going to be my predicament sooner rather than later. I don't plan on doing much with my life anyway and the degree i was getting was probably going to be useless anyway, i kind of hate that i like being this stagnant, if i could be like this forever i'd go on and on, just drawing, using my computer, exercising and consooming media, that's it. I guess the stuntment is a product of not having anything worth becoming, we are lower than the average person, a higher person has goals and motivations, something to telll or do, normals have their roles, which are heavily gendered, we have nothing. We are nothing, but we get to look prettier at it at least. Vanity, Hedonism and some curiosity.

>>44925346
>a higher person has goals and motivations
and getting better at drawing isnt a goal? creative endeavors are the best for people like us because we can channel our manchild energy into fun stuff. and the job we get serves the function of not having us starve to death so we can create.
>>44921219
>>44921697
>>44922505
>>44925298
also extremely fucking concerning so many of you are like this. then again this website is generally just full of people in arrested development so what else is new. i will be quitting 4chan for good now and hope you all do the same.

>>44925475
i can't make anything artistically meaningful, i have nothing to say and no one i care to say things to, i just don't want to be heard or seen, i want to take as little space as possible, knowing i'm not affecting others in any way has been one my biggest joys since i was a child, just wandering around.