had another bpd meltdown and my girlfriend just gave up trying and left me for an intershit. i dont blame her i figured itd happen eventually and i was an awful partner but like what am i supposed to do with myself now. she was entirely funding my hrt and other transition stuff and just my future in general and im completely unemployable (dropped out of 8th grade + very mentally ill). i dont have any friends or anything to fall back on and my family still thinks the tranny stuff is a phase that'll go away if they keep ignoring it. do i just rope?
>>44959276>bpd meltdownwhat's this look like? honestly trying to learnwas there a specific trigger?
>>44959341i thought she was acting weird (she'd already reassured me before that when i think that its just because shes busy) so i kept pestering her about if she was ok, after she got a little irritated at me constantly asking i spiraled into being convinced she was mad at me for it and i was upsetting her so i self isolated.
>>44959420so bpd it seems can be about feeding your own insecurities (which are valid and come from actual events in your life that changed you) and then shit testing people with them, or being needy til they are driven away, thus reinforcing the insecurity, which is used to explain why said thing that set of bpd happened, on some pych level probablysometimes helps to accept that you will feel said insecurity.. you will feel it deeply sometimes but it literally isn't real most the time. It's like a voice in your head that has no bearing on reality.Someone with BPD thinks that a face that is 70% happy is actually more mad then happy, according to experiments, the reality is just not actually real sometimes and the insecurity just needs to be managed somehow, not ignored, but not feed.. i don't know, hope that might help, it can get better the more you learn about yourself, but also you will suffer cause people are shitty and you feel much more deeply in general. "hey i missed you so much, i was going crazy so i wrote you a poem while you were busy." is much better then spiraling but i know it can be hard to channel it when the pain is there
dont rope you will find a new fp fuck that bitch u also need to stop being a fag and self isolating nigger
>>44959500you have an impressive level of awareness and descriptiveness about your predicament. keep learning about yourself. you will find someone that can play off of you and help you grow perfect in due time. let them earn you and vice versa. you can do this
>>44959667>let them earn youEver the victim
>>44959677what do you think "and vice versa" means. christ almighty
>>44959687It means you're putting equal responsibility in the relationship for a problem that's not on equal sides
>>44959702it is equal on both sides nigger,
