I was looking around and I mentioned in ... some boymoder thread i dont remember when i was drunk about a bridge in my city but the problem is those thoughts didnt really go away so im out here but i googled it and apparently the bridge is way too low to actually do anything but i really wanted to just not have to worry about looking like a freak anymore, not boymoding anymore, not saving for surgery anymore, not worrying if everyone around me just pretends im normal or that its ok for someone like me to exist when maybe they dont even mean it. idk. i only went out to buy milk but the more i walk around the worse it gets and its pretty unbearable. im not as much of a piece of shit as i used to be before i trooned out and yet the feeling id do this eventually has always stuck around and i feel weirdly at peace tonight, maybe ready or something but then again i really dont want my partner to do anything bc of it bc i rly think they would bc they said before any advice i guess
please be safe nona, you have people who care about you
