>>45071368
take your HRT, retards

>>45071374
i would if i had any and if there was any point

>>45071572
trvke

>>45071374
all the trustworthy diy places are out :(

I rep because time is a flat circle

>>45071368
Agent Smith was more reppercoded imo.

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I'm literally Rust Cohle except instead of losing my daughter and witnessing horrific acts of human cruelty I just couldn't be an anime girl

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>>45072094
I love anime. There are few better thing to do while drinking alone in a dark room than watch anime. I like to imagine that in some other, kinder universe I am going on adventures as a pretty anime girl in a pretty anime world.

>>45071590
doesn't work sadly, even if I can get myself into a temporary dopamine haze I just want to kms even more when it goes away and I'm still a big ogre man

>>45071641
doesn't matter because reppers are rat cowardly bastards who wish things never existed the way they are ie deny truth

>>45071368
Can’t enjoy sex unless I’m a girl. But when I crossdress and hook up with my friend I hate how I look because I don’t have breasts and hips. I don’t look femme enough. The outfit and makeup alone is not enough. Cooming is the only thing that keeps these thoughts at bay.

>>45072707
well I was talking about a dopamine haze, also I haven't crossdressed since I was very young I just finger myself and grind against a blanket fully clothed with my eyes closed while I imagine getting fucked
my desire to be a woman doesn't go away afterwards it gets worse because I can think about it clearly

>>45071374
Nope. I won't. John 50 will never be me.

>>45071590
It comes back a few minutes for me. If anything post nut clarity wants to make me be a woman EVEN MORE. I do feel the dysphoria easing up the past few days though. Distractions help, like video games. Right now I'm playing a game and I noticed that the main character had jiggle physics on her breasts. I stared at them a lot throughout the session, and I think this reminds me that maybe I am a man after all. A woman would never look at another woman with such a predatory gaze like this, even a fictional one. Thank god I treat real life women with respect to not see them as objects like this.

Johnhammer 50k

>>45071572
TRVKE

t. wanted to be feminine only since i was exposed to twink/femboy porn as a teenager

I wish i could use the porn excuse for other stuff. Why are you so lazy anon? well...I saw some porn of a woman sleeping all day and now I can't stop.

I feel my inner chud is about to explode and is ready to return.

>>45073232
If the world is going to be so retarded and hateful, why shouldn't my inner chud return? It's not like anyone will ever love me no matter what I do in life.

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>>45071572
>You’re not “repping” anything
Then why does it hurt so bad?

>>45071572
>>45073115
My first fully formed explicit thought of "I want to be a girl" was in early childhood, before puberty or sexual thoughts and before any exposure to porn.
My first exposure to "porn" was in middle school, when I stumbled across smutty self-insert text stories for women about getting raped by men. I was immediately VERY into it, like I was just transfixed. A normal cis straight boy is not going to have that reaction. He's just going to think "huh, that's weird" and then go look at pictures of boobs or something.
Point being that no, porn didn't make me this way because a) I was having these thoughts before porn and before I even knew what sex was, and b) when I did bring porn into the mix, there was no "ramp up" period like porn addicts talk about (getting desensitized and needing more and more extreme material), I was just fully into it right from the get go.
>>45071590
It comes and goes in waves for me. Sometimes it's the only thing I'm thinking about, sometimes it's barely a factor in my life at all. The waves can last weeks or months. But the sexual fantasies about being a woman are essentially constant though, I barely fap to anything else, especially these days.

>>45073089
Well you're a man because you were born with a dick and balls and XY chromosomes, not because you like staring at anime boobs.
You might be a man who wishes he was a woman very badly. You might even be a man who uses drugs and surgery to turn his body into a flesh sculpture resembling a woman. This is all possible. Maybe you'd even be happier that way, who knows. But you'll always be male and not female. That part's not in question, so stop worrying about it.

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How do I into skincare routines?

>>45073300
Yes I know that. That's why I'm not pursuing transition. The thought of me skinwalking a woman who's not even real just feels like cosmic horror to me.

>>45071368
i wouldn’t describe the first 25 years of my life as “bliss”, but i guess everything was a lot less complicated

>>45071572
no one ever believes me when i say this but istg i didn’t start looking at porn and masturbating until i was like 16, and had not seen a single anime series until about 25. so, both long after the thoughts began. i truly don’t know where i would have gotten a “fetish” from.

When I'm a normal cis man when an errant porn ray hits my brain flipping a single bit turning me into a sissy bimbo tranny girl bottom.

>>45072609
idk it's definitely early agp

I wish being 5'5 and having long straight hair actually made me look female

>>45071368
i’m the only true repper, the only one so manly hrt could never do something, and the only one that shouldn’t even try
but i did

You should all post your butts for me to select the most breedable one to feminize.

>>45073413
Yeah “porn addiction made me this way” is just a cope. It doesn’t even come from AGPs themselves most of the time. It mainly comes from cis men (both straight and gay) who have never felt gender dysphoria before and have no frame of reference for understanding it at all, but they do know that they feel vaguely threatened by it for some reason, so they invent stories to convince themselves that no one could ever REALLY feel that way naturally.
Every single time you have a guy who wants to be a girl, he always showed signs from a young age that he was at least a little faggy (i.e. he has this potential latent within him already). I’ve never seen a single case of a normal masculine male being converted to trannyism by the discord shadow cabal.

>>45073593
>he always showed signs from a young age that he was at least a little faggy
not me, i'm as fake as fake can be and didn't even think about this sorta thing at all as an adult just five years ago

>>45073621
Well. Just treat it like any other unrealistic fetish then, like hyper inflation or animal tf or some shit. Fun to fap to but not something to organize your life around. If you only acquired it recently then it should be just as easy to get rid of too.

>>45073578
uhh buddy gaygen is THAT way

>>45071572
none of my reasons for wanting to be a woman are even remotely sexual

>>45073737
Like truly nothing? You wouldn’t even prefer having sex as a woman to having sex as a man?
I don’t think sexual reasons are ~invalid~ or anything. I would expect most people to have a mix of sexual and non-sexual reasons

>>45072709
If you think that is depressing, then you've never experienced true hardship or have any knowledge of it.

Was anyone else really into Cardcaptor Sakura as a kid? Or other girls’ media?
I didn’t even know it was a “girl’s show” at the time, I just thought it was cool af.

>>45073798
I liked to imagine myself as Sakura when I was 7 or 8 years old yeah.

My fellow repressors, it's most likely over. I've been diagnosed with stage iv pancreatic cancer. It's kinda bittersweet. I regret not ever seriously trying, but now it doesn't even matter.

>>45073918
My condolences

What will you do with your remaining time

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>>45073918
You are going to a better place, anon. Death isn't the end of life, it is the beginning. Like a child being born you are moving into the next stage of living.

As you get closer to death you will begin having prophetic dreams, visitations from spirits, and a sense of preparing yourself for an adventure. There are people waiting to welcome you to the other side and you will meet them soon.

>>45073930
Same things as I've been doing so far really. Which is not much other than just existing

>>45073935
've been having some insane dreams not sure if it's chemo or something related to mindset related to impending death, but you're right about that. ould I call them prophetic, not sure

>>45071368
>goon to the idea of me being a trans girl bottoming for my friend
>very femme body/mind sensation
>insane orgasm
>no more trans desire
>try to goon to cis woman where I’m still male
>can’t even get it up

is it over?

>>45073578
don’t tempt me
>>45073918
I’m so sorry life can be so cruel

>>45073952
You can read about it in "Death is but a dream" by Christopher Kerr.

The dreams will usually be comforting and help you resolve the trauma and this life but also give you hope of the next life.

I hope you find your peace anon!

>>45073965
>very femme body/mind sensation
Explain more? Were you doing anal/prostate stimulation?
No matter how much I imagine or pretend, stroking my dick just feels like stroking my dick. It’s never felt like anything else.

>>45073969
>I’m so sorry life can be so cruel
what's cruel in retrospect is that I refused to unalive myself so many times because that would be "cowardly" and if, if there is any judgment after death I was afraid I would be punished even worse than what I was forced to endure. yet here we are, it's like it didn't even matter.

My penis is too fucking big god I hate it. Even when flaccid it's big.

>>45073918
god must have a succubus opening for you in heaven

>>45071572
you merely adopted the agp i was born in it moulded by it
by the time i developed cis masculinity it was nothing to me but disassociating

>>45074014
I just feel like ultra femme. I don’t know how to explain it. The orgasm is more full body. My nipples are way more sensitive. Like if someone did something with their mouth on them I’d bust. And then in my mind i just feel like a bad bitch.

anyone else only manipulate things by the tips of their fingers it's really weird i don't do it whole heartedly with the whole hand

>>45073918
That's rough repster. Hopefully you (and all of us) get a second chance

>>45074212
>>>/x/
I was never romantically nor sexually interested in anyone, so unless I become someone else, no

One of the many reasons I’d rather be female than male is that I just hate the idea of engaging in male sexual courtship and male sexual competition so fucking much. Why should I be the one who has to “approach” people? It’s degrading. Why shouldn’t they be the ones approaching me? I’m honestly just too much of a narcissist for it. I’m not going to degrade myself by chasing after women because that’s just yet another way of reinforcing their inherent superiority over me. They’re desirable, I’m not.
>”but anon, it’s not like women can just lay there and have happiness fall into their laps, they still have to go out and try and conform to female beauty standards, and if you do end up alone everyone will shit on you for being a failed spinster cat lady”
Yes, I’m aware that no one just gets a perfectly easy life for free. Every type of life has its tradeoffs, its benefits and drawbacks. But the point is that I’d rather take the female drawbacks and risks over the male ones. If I’m going to fail, then I’d rather fail as an object that wasn’t desirable enough, rather than as a pursuer who wasn’t man enough.

>the idea of engaging in male sexual courtship and male sexual competition

you think women are not competitive? if you only hanged out with women sometimes and learned the dynamics you would have wrote different.

>>45074325
There is inter-female competition, but it’s competition of a different type and for different reasons.
Fundamentally, men are the ones who approach women. If you are a not-ugly woman and you get on a dating app or walk into a bar or club (or frankly just almost anywhere in public), you will be hit on. In fact it happens so much that women are always complaining that they get hit on too much! You would have to be delusional to deny these very basic facts.

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>>45073918
Fuck. I'll be looking out for you in the next life. Hopefully, we'll both be the correct gender that go around.

>>45074344
you do you, but imho transitioning only because grass seems greener on the other side is transition over all wrong reasons and can end up being more pain than happiness. good luck regardless.

>>45074391
I would never troon out anyway so it doesn’t matter. I don’t see the point unless we had scifi technology that gave you a female skeleton and a functioning uterus.
I explicitly said that even if I would still end up unhappy as a woman, at least I would be unhappy for DIFFERENT REASONS than the ones that are causing my unhappiness now, which would be preferable to me; but maybe this is too subtle of a distinction for you to understand.

>>45074449
i'm sorry I upset you anon. i should have read what you wrote better.

>>45074473
Nah it’s fine don’t worry. I just get frustrated at people gatekeeping which reasons are ~valid~ or not and having to constantly justify myself. I think people without dysphoria just might fundamentally be unable to really understand; they’ll never have the same experience.

>>45071368
not too fond of mirrors

>>45074547
i wonder how it feels to look into the mirror and mostly like what you see (I know almost no one loves themselves 100%, not even cis people, hence "mostly")

>>45074565
i don't know
i wish i could see myself, think little of it and move on as if nothing significant happened

>>45073918
Rest easy anon. I hope you enjoy your remaining time here with family/friends/anyone. And I hope you get to be your desired gender in the afterlife (or the next one)

>>45071572
trvke

>>45074547
Me neither. I purpose don't look in the mirror at all. When I do catch a glimpse of my general outline in my peripheral vision, I already know it's over. My build is too masculine.

>>45074224
Can you describe your experience with cis masculinity and disassociating? I disassociate but since I never had a gf I never had to perform masculinity beyond the simple "lift furniture" and stuff like that.

I've been slowly retraining my sexual fantasies in a more male POV direction. It's kind of like meditation tho, the more you focus the longer you can maintain the male POV. My 90 day goal is to have 100% male fantasies without accidentally wandering off into female POV whatsoever.

i've kissed a girl in my dream
she was the friend of mine and we never ever talk again
weirdly women are kinda interested in me but i'm 0/10 and a repper tranny, they don't know

>>45074303
This. My entire life I have thought "I am tired of chasing people." As >>45074325 says it's not to do with being trans, it's probably just depression and some latent trauma.

>>45074303
>>45075577
don't tell me you never were approached by a woman or women never flirted with you

>>45075637
>never were approached by a woman
Maybe in a friendly way? And that was only because we were classmates and she needed some information from me.
>women never flirted with you
Yeah, they didn't

>>45075637
Basically about twice in my life. And that ONLY ever covers like, the initial first contact. After that you’re expected to take over and act like a man and perform the standard male social scripts. Their interest always evaporates immediately once they discover that you’re not masculine (as it did in all my cases).
I know I sound like I’m bitter at women and I’m blaming them, but I swear I’m not. I don’t want to get fucked by a sissy fag either kek, if I’m going to get fucked by a man then he better look and act like a man. I literally understand where women are coming from 100% perfectly. The only thing I’m bitter at is that my body doesn’t match my natural instincts and preferred role, that’s all.

i wonder how much of /gywb/ is actually just repping

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It's all a big humiliation ritual, you have to beg and grovel for supposedly basic aspects of human life like a partner or work
I'm sick of it

>>45075127
I’ve occasionally tried to do this throughout my life, but only halfheartedly. Male POV has just never reached the pleasure and comfort of female POV no matter how much I’ve done it. Female POV always comes back in the end because I can’t access that pleasure any other way. Thinking about vanilla straight sex where I fuck a girl in her pussy may as well be masturbating to wallpaper, it just never sticks at all. If I imagine the woman dominating me then that’s a lot more enjoyable, although still not QUITE as good as female POV. Thinking about being a woman with a man just feels so natural.
Normally I swing between the two sides, but for the past month I’ve only fapped to female POV, I’ve never been stuck on one side for so long. Part of me is a little worried about it and feels like I might be losing part of myself, but part of me feels like it would be easier and more fun to just go fully gay anyway.

>>45075038
I still haven't told shit to my closest ones. Still have no idea how the fuck do I tell them without making them feel like shit.

I've resolved I'm going to tell my parents I'm transgender in December, when I'm back for winter break.
Posting this here so it's externalized and not just in my head. Sorry for the blogpost.

>>45075661
you're lying or don't talk with anybody at all
>>45075794
so what is you reaction? Are you backpedalling and pushing them away?

i have a girl who hits on me a lot but we see each other two times a month. idk she's kinda into chasing and embarrassing me or something. i'm literally nothing special, just a nerdy guy with a receding hairline, i think my reaction drives her.

hah the last time i was in a club an older lady hit on me and asked on a date, but she was like 3/10 (not smart and fat) so i declined that was weird.
and one friend i think tested me if i like her like a gf (i don't).

i don't know what changed a year ago women were disgusted by me.

i'm thinking about that girl, i don't like a few traits in her but the feeling of being chased is so sweet, maybe she even like subby men but still men that's the killer. idk if my transness was more obvious maybe i'd let her sit on my face, i'm just not cute enough for myself.
i'm stupid.........

Really feel like killing myself tonight

the planets aren't in a good position for that anon

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>>45073593
>at least a little faggy
i was beat up a girl a couple times in grade school does that count?

>>45076276
>you're lying or don't talk with anybody at all
Why is it so hard for you to believe that I am a real person? Have some fucking empathy

>>45073593
I had AGP since years before puberty. Yet I still feel like a cis man that has a lot of unpacked trauma and external factors gave me gender dysphoria. I do not feel that my innate gender identity is female, and I know if I pursue transition it would be a really bad idea for me. I really do wish I was a woman, but it's just not possible. Hoping I can move past this. I hate myself but I just have to accept what I am and try to improve my life.

I can feel my chud self slowly taking over my body as we speak. Please help me, what do I do? I plan on getting fucked up tonight so I don't stir in hatred of others. I'd rather hate myself.

no one likes me

>>45077159
*mwah*

>>45077159
bet i'd like you. i like everyone, but is universally disliked.

>>45076394
Please don't. Talk to me if you want to.

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>>45076276
>you're lying or don't talk with anybody at all
this is literally the norm for at least 25% of men under 30 if i had to guess

>>45072709
do you think I'm not aware of that?

>>45078081
It's not like you can make my life worth living
I don't want to spend the rest of it doing some minimum wage shit, zero friends, zero love, family members either throwing me away or dying out slowly

>>45073737
Could you elaborate, anon? I'm curious if it's a "failed male" sort of feeling where you felt frequently humiliated as a child.

Maybe its not the lesbian princess stuff that turns adventure time fans trans, but the fact that Finn makes boyhood look like a huge humiliation ritual

>>45078782
I get the feeling. I'm the same way. Yeah, it sucks having this be your life.

>>45073759
I would prefer having sex as a woman. For some reason, the thought of having sex as a man fills me with so much anxiety and existential dread. I wasn't this way a few months ago, and I'm not forcing this feeling. Gender dysphoria is a beast like I've never encountered before.

>>45073918
peace out anon

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>>45071368
God that screenshot is so telling. Good luck all my rappers, i did for so many years. Transitioning saved me. Be true to yourselves. I rmemeber the constant agony repping brought and the waves and the so many times I almost came out.

.

I was so fucking stupid holy shit why did I go down this path

It doesn't get better.

I am the GOAT of drunk driving at 3am

>>45071374
I'm saving you from an opticsnvke retard.

Never Troon.
(unless you could actually pull it off ofc in which case GTFO)

>>45080390
That’s true for us. You however, are a poser.

>>45078948
nta but i could've said that same sentiment verbatim

i simply just harbor extreme contempt for myself and long to be someone else entirely. i AM a failed male, but not because i failed to BE a male, rather i'm a failure that happens TO BE male. i'm a NEET in all but name, going to class for appearance's sake but still failing them at the ripe age of 25, having not learned essentially anything to show for it, and spend all my time chasing whatever distractions i can.

the primary reason why i want to be a woman is to have a fresh start, and i believe that if i was born female, i'd've developed into a more stable person with far less executive dysfunction (girls are more academically inclined than boys on average, after all). i am defined by squandered potential as my family and upbringing were never that bad to warrant the way i ended up now. none of my reasons are sexual because i don't see myself ever realistically having sex, so that aspect is null to me, and even romance is essentially dead in the water as a goal; it'd be too much trouble than it's worth even if i was independent, let alone now as a leech

i'm passive, excessively withdrawn, weird, and have a head full of static. when i think of what could've been had i been a girl, i see someone else entirely, living on her own, taking care of herself physically (which i hardly do), and maybe even having friends to talk to, instead of someone composing paragraphs of fluff just an hour and a half before the sun will start to rise.

>>45080859
How am I a poser? I gave up so long ago that idk if I can even survive

Daily Reminder That HRT Reppers don't exist and are NOT cute nor valid.

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>>45080404
if drunk driving is wrong then why the fuck is it so much FUN??

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>>45081180
sorry, i would fuck off if the /mmg/ threads weren't such dogshit

>>45081558
Come with me. We're going to the time out room.

Reasons for failed-malehood (tick all that apply):

Ugly[ ]
Fat[ ]
Disabled[ ]
Autistic[x]
Disfigured[ ]
Personality[ ]
Height[ ]

>>45081098
>I don't see myself realistically having sex
Same. My confidence has been shattered over the years. All sex does now is my fill my mind with anxiety and existential dread, not to mention the dysphoria. It's retarded as fuck, but nowadays I'd much rather be friends with women than have sex with them. I'm talking close friends, I don't want to be seen as that "male friend". God, what the fuck happened to me? Being a low value male really is one of the worst fates you can get outside of the obvious things like cancer, malnourishment, getting bombed, flooded, etc.

You know what? Days are colder, winter is soon, and women in winter clothes do not give me so much dysphoria (no one stands out, no one looks distinguishing everyone kinda blends in). F yeah!

>>45082355
Women's winter attire can be so cute though

>>45082419
Can be, but rarely anyone dresses "cute" anymore

i see the girls walkby dressed in their summer clothes
i have to turnmy head until my darkness goes

>>45082355
i love winter. comfy blankets, I can wear big jackets to hide my body and I can go outside earlier without the evil sun aging my skin.

I injected E for a while but stopped years ago because I didn't think it made any difference. Also I hate needles. Fuck needles.

still jerk off to agp shit every day.

>>45082561
>not hot enough for stalkers

>>45082352
Ill be fr i'd rather survive a traumatic gunshot to the head and turn into chad than be inwkell lowk

Artistic soul but zero artistic talent

I'm like medusa cuz if you show me my reflection I'll die.

>>45083191
I avoid mirrors and if I accidentally catch a glimpse of my masculine frame or face in my peripheral vision, I feel bad. Some days however, I looked into the mirror and didn't feel that bad but still couldn't look beyond a few seconds. Does that mean my dysphoria can be cured?

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How do I earnestly get into religion as a nonbeliever? I don't mean in a 'seeking spiritual comfort' sort of way, rather, I refuse to kill myself unless I know there's an afterlife and I'd like to get that hurdle out of the way. If the feed just ends, nothing at the end of the tunnel, where's the catharsis?

>>45084180
Spiritual things are very real anon. Tons of evidence for that stuff.

i can look at my reflection i just really hate the way i look
am i a fakerepper

>>45084542
idk I don't have any problem looking at your reflection.

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>>45071374
HRT won't unrape me or turn everyone into an anthro woman.
>>45073918
Condolences nonny.
>>45074547
Wondering if the hatred of photos is related.
>>45075815
Jokes on you I just coom to /hfur/, /hdg/, /gock/ and /mhg/.
>>45076214
Pray it goes well.

I was going to transition but then I remembered that someone in the world might find me ugly or nonpassing so I won't do it now just because of that.

We were never real people. We were always ghosts.

'ere lookit lookit
dat liddl faggit wi' de earring an de makeup
huh, yeah, buddy, das his own hair
dat liddle faggit got 'is own jetplane
dat liddle faggit, he's a millionair
we gotta install repperwave oven
we gotta move dose tranny teevees

o dat ain' troonin'
das de way ya do it

What do you think about the idea of telling a family member that you have gender dysphoria, but assure them that you won't transition? I'm too cowardly to do that, but it sucks having me be the only one in my personal life that knows this.

do you remember like berlin was capital of lgbt and they performed trans surgeries and then they turned nazi
and america was the most woke country for the past few years so does it mean nazification of america was inevitable?
trannies > nazis

>>45073413
>i didn’t start looking at porn and masturbating until i was like 16
Same anon, almost 17 for me. There's plenty of other reasons why I'm faketrans but being a fetishist isn't one of them.

>>45085458
Not a good idea if theyre even a little transphobic

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>>45085428

>>45073918
It's all pointless anyway. The only thing about death that really bothers me is that I won't be around to see where humanity goes, and all the cool science fiction stuff we could possibly invent. The world is in a shit state anyway and we're almost certainly doomed as a species.

>>45085578
I can't be the only one here who used to be a nazi chud. Talk about a cosmic twist of fate. I don't want your forgiveness. I want your scorn. I deserve it for being an unempathetic piece of shit all those years ago.

>>45086283
i forgive you

>>45085458
That seems entirely pointless

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>>45081180
wdym boymoder isn't real?
wtf wtf wtf?????

>>45082355
ever seen a tall woman in boots

I miss Crystallia

>>45082000
Ugly[X]
Fat[X]
Disabled[ ]
Autistic[ ]
Disfigured[X]
Personality[X]
Height[X]

Best I can hope for is to become an hero

>>45075118
idk it's like a constant feeling of feeling like an impostor even though i can do male things like sports and haul things and like doing it elegantly with technical perfection i can't be competetive in a boisterous way which other guys can pick up on and marginalize me and the coarse banter just makes me feel dizzy like passing out big time fucked up school and career and barely made out with an average despite being ambitious i'm sitting in a hole can't even think about things like gf maybe it's also other issues but potato potato

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i need vodka and a single shell of 00 buckshot
i am being denied humanitarian aid

>>45086195
ironically, at least I am happy it's not a testicular or prostate cancer.

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the more I think about it the more it hurts

you know how in old films they say a woman is supposed to be something that suffers silently and now we're suffering and getting snuffed it's kinda hot and mefy to think about

>>45084864
>Pray it goes well.
Thank you anon, God willing. I can't keep living like this, and honestly, university has one-shot me.

>>45076214
>>45088106
do you have anyone you can tell besides your parents? do you have any clues as to how your parents will react? what is your plan if they don't accept it? you might be surprised at how hateful self-identified "progressives" can be when they find out it's *their* child.

>t. came out to parents in 2009
>and their reaction was so bad that I let it ruin my life
>they probably don't remember
>but I've thought about it every day

>>45076214
>>45088124
LOOOL my parents won't even support me in respectable ambitious things how will they ever support me in such a ridiculous embarrassing thing

>>45088124
>do you have anyone you can tell
I'm semi-out to about half of my friends but of course unless you transition none of that is taken seriously
>do you have any clues as to how your parents will react?
Badly, all signs point to conservative and traditional. In the past they found my hrt and I was able to kind of shrug it off. (Things are complicated now so please don't respond with "just continue doing that")
>what is your plan if they don't accept it?
Nothing, I guess. I don't get the impression they will become hellbent on destroying me, they do seem to care about me getting a job and being moderately financially successful. And education is a great value to them, they would not let their hate steamroll my university education.
>self-identified "progressives"
They are not.
>>45088129
Indeed. My thoughts exactly.

>>45085458
It depends entirely on what kind of family you have. But it seems to me that there is no difference between intending to transition or not. If they would have judged you for trooning they will judge you for being dysphoric. They aren't gonna give you props or be compassionate.

>>45073578
>tfw meta attraction so strong don't think of them as mere sex objects but critical support structures to get through life
uh oh here come the fantasies of being a house 'repper' who gets forcefully injected with full dose of girl juice

I'm gonna kill myself because being male is for subhumans

I'm not trans I'm just an effeminate faggot that never developed a masculine side because all my male role models were shit while also repressing my feminine side for too long due to being afraid of said male role models
and I'm afraid of aging into a balding creepy gay man and
uhm
i dunno that's all the copes i came up with today

>>45088244
males are the only real humans, we just want to be foids because we are retarded

>>45088490
smells like sour grapes, maybe schopenhauer was a repper too

>>45088490
I might be retarded but females are humans too.

>>45088490
You'd have to be retarded to not want to be female

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>>45088490
The spirit of what you are saying is correct but it needs to be specified.
On a scientific technicality both men and women are humans. BUT women are not as sapient as men,their nature being far more emotional,reactive to their environment and generally animalistic,completely lacking the spark of higher intelligence that even average men posses. Bioholes are more akin to well evolved parasites having managed to mimic human speech to get resources out of sapient humans aka men and survive.
A far more interesting experiment for the times we live in would be to see the mental changes a ftm trans has and how the development of higher intelligence that male hormones induce have on them. It is a case study that needs to be done.

>>45088735
>see the mental changes a ftm trans has and how the development of higher intelligence that male hormones induce have on them
No higher intelligence. Just made me crave food and lifted my depression thanks to body changes.
Sorry for invading your thread.

>>45088735
Pooners are even worse than your regular AFAB women

MTF reppers and FTM reppers are brothers and sisters. Stop the in-fighting!

>>45088735
bait but calling women "more emotional" is laughable when us men lead the way in irrational, liferuining decisions like committing suicide, homicide (mass murder especially), generally getting into fights, assault, and so on and so forth
again, sour grapes

A friend group I’m in has a guy bragging about getting nudes from girls and how hes going to share some of them and I feel absolutely no interest in it
I like girls and guys but I feel absolutely nothing at the idea of omg nudes
I feel like I should

>>45088934
All afab trannies are the fucking worst stay the fuck away from me

>>45089312
true we should kill all afabs

anyone received a tribute in random kik group probably means nothing right it's a <3 star rated app full of dumbfucks

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>>45089312
>afab trannies, don't you play your games with me

>>45089321
Just the trannies.

There is no person on the planet with more toxic masculinity than afab trannies

Gay anime sissy. That's me alright.

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>>45072055

Need a boymoder defending a repper and saying "HE SAID NO ESTROGEN!"

>>45089801
Please

>>45089801
jarvis generate this

>>45089801
Me

i wish i could get a glimpse of what my life will be like in a couple years so i know whether to kms or keep going
sometimes i dream about things and they end up happening
God if you can hear me please help me dream about what my future will be like

>>45089801
make it he said no masculinity idk or something vague like don't bother him
heard the latter a lot

>>45084180
this but i want nothing after death
i was scared of hell because i thought i'll burn forever but then i heard it might be an endless void with only your thoughts
and that scares me more
also i want my mother to watch us burn for eternity and if that's not possible what's the point?
i'd say i want reincarnation but i'm tired of existing

afab hate is annoying and overdone
solidarity

I want an afab to feminize me. Yeah, I'm fucking horny. The fuck you gonna do about it?

>>45090990
i will use my evil amab soul to destroy all afabs

One amab could destroy all afabness in the universe. All afabity is vulnerable to the evil amaboid soul.

>>45090995
I'm not entitled to anyone's time or attention but I could die happy if an afab did that for me.

i can feel everyone hating me

nobody cares more likely

i can feel my power

>>45091303
stop being sad and lazy and making others carry your transition for you

people need to start respecting my true amab masculinity

im sorry for being amab

i am a disgusting ugly monster i need to die

>>45091881
Yeah that's why I said I'm not entitled to it. It would just be a nice thing to have.
>transition
I'm not. This is the repper thread.

>>45092023
tsmt

>>45092108
im sorry
i just also think this to myself all the time

>>45092192
yeah me too

kill all straight people

>>45092058
don't remember posting that

>>45092464
i posted it for you

>>45092486
thank you

I wanna get blackout drunk but it's fucking Wednesday tomorrow, and all I got as shitty closet made wine so the hangover will be extremely. I Dont know what to do, I just don't want to be conscious, But I can't fall asleep

>>45092914
Lonely drunk sucks. Drunk with family is okay. Drunk with friends can be fun but I always circle back to lonely drunk behavior even when I'm with people. Also I don't experience hangovers so I guess I'm lucky in that regard. I had 11 drinks one night and went to work fine the next morning. But it sucks in general because alcohol is one of the very few things I look forward to anymore. I was watching an old girly Disney channel movie with my sister and we enjoyed each other's commentary on it. Then I started falling asleep in my living room with a beer in hand and my other sister forcibly took it from me and gave me a pizza in return. Fuck.

i wish i had a girlfriend before realizing i'm dysphoric so i could at least rule out being an incel
but even if i wasn't dysphoric i'd still be a miserable loser

>>45093793
Incels and non incels alike can still be dysphoric.

Is there a mental disorder that explains why im generally okay with being a man with an average sized penis in my day to day life but whenever i get high and fantasize about other men i cant be anything other than a dainty little girl

>>45094148
what if my dysphoria is fake and i just needed a girlfriend to be happy

i am jax digital circus time to kill myself

Stop repping losers

>>45094761
i refuse to be a disgusting tranny

>>45094865
Then take hrt in private and don’t come out

>>45094917
but what if i am 90 years old and dying from cancer and i have dementia

>>45094865
you already are one, tranny

>>45094930
but im not on hrt

>>45094927
Still do it, it’ll improve your mental health

I’m a boymoder but I cannot describe how much better I felt since starting hrt 2 years ago

>>45094949
you're still a tranny, just one that's stuck and hiding

>>45094956
but hrt wont change the fact that i will always look like a man

>>45095049
Maybe it will!
Or it won’t. You’d be surprised how much it does change, I can guarantee you’ll be happier with hrt then without though

>>45095066
getting hrt sounds hard and needles are scary and im a neet loser with no income and my mom would not support me and im a ugly retard

>>45095103
You have 4 options for types of hrt:
>injection
>pill
>gel
>patches
Only one of them is spooky

Income I’m less sure of but if you can get the money together for diy as long as you get a blood test 3 months into taking hrt you’ll be fine

I get there are issues, but you will feel better, I can guarantee it

>>45095141
i need someone to hold my hand and walk me through it step by step

>>45095174
What country are you in?
I’m British so my method will only get you so far if you’re elsewhere

Dreamed about getting forcefemmed again

>>45095198
my mom wants to move to italy so we are moving to italy

>>45094761
I can't

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>>45095380
Picrel is some random Italian trans woman I found
>>45095396
Whhhhhhhy

>>45095410
this all looks really hard and scary to do

>>45095431
Learning to walk was scary back when you were a baby. Try it for a month, and if you hate it at least then you know you gave it a shot and can quit

>>45095438
im not even capable of taking the first step of trying hrt

>>45095449
Why not?

>>45095458
because i am a retarded loser neet

I am a man amongst men

>>45095462
Everyone has been at some point, ever consider that part of your depression may be dysphoria?

Not going to pretend your mental health would be fixed with hrt, but the dysphoria part would be alleviated

>>45095472
how would the dysphoria alleviate if i will always look like a man

>>45095479
Because every day you spend with testosterone as your dominant hormone you become more permanently masculine

You can stop it and reverse some of the effects even if not all

And surgery is an option for a lot of the stuff that can’t be reversed

>>45095492
but it cant fix my bones

>>45095497
Which bones?

>>45095511
all of them

>>45095512
lol be actually specific

Who gives a fuck if your ulna bones doesn’t pass

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>>45095530

>>45095550
You know not every woman is like 4ft right?

Like I said I’m a 5ft 11 boymoder and used to feel dysphoric as fuck about that, but walking down the street I routinely see women as tall as me so it bothers me less nowadays

need more alcohol

>>45095572
from what i understand when women have masculine features like being tall they get the body dysmorphia and then they commit suicide

>>45095603
Anon, do you know what a model is?

Jokes aside, you’re projecting your self hate onto them. Cis women do get dysphoric but being tall is not going to be the 13th reason for most

>>45095636
i dont really exist so im not capable of projecting anything

>>45095650
Booooo, boring and uncreative depersonalisation

Do hrt already nerd

>>45095670
im sorry for being boring

>>45095677
Just take hrt and be less miserable

>>45095713
but what if hrt makes me more miserable

>>45095724
Why would it? You already find being masculine miserable. Being more feminine will only improve things

>>45095778
because if i take it and nothing changes that would make me sad

>>45095808
It will 100% change things. That’s just what hrt does

>>45095869
ok but im not capable of getting hrt because i am a retarded loser neet that lives with his unsupportive mom

Supposedly a repper burned himself alive on camera. waddafuck man

>>45095908
Not according to that one Vietnamese monk who lit himself on fire to protest the war

>>45095884
I managed whilst living with an unsupportive family, you can too

>>45095979
how

>>45095990
I just ordered it online and picked it up from the door the moment it arrived

>>45096105
my mom would get suspicious if i ordered something without telling her

>>45096116
Then get it sent to a friends place, or store, or just make up an excuse for what it is

>>45096147
i dont have friends

>>45096154
I gave you two other ways of doing it. If you but a three month supply this won’t be a consistent concern anyway

>>45096182
sorry for wasting your time

>>45096251
You didn’t waste my time, just I’m confused why you won’t take a risk to be happy

>>45096260
i am a coward

>>45096278
We both know it’s what you want. Be brave once

I'm starting to think that gender critical makes sense

>>45096461
spiterepping just makes you feel even worse don't do it

sometimes/alldayeveryday I ponder trooning out, but then I remember that I'm a 6'2 manbeast with linebacker shoulders and it could never work

>>45096647
It's not out of spite. I used to imagine myself as a man in the future. Now, despite being unable to imagine a future at all, I wish badly that I was a woman in the present. I think what pushed me over the edge in giving me dysphoria was this bullshit society's crushingly oppressive gender roles (male in my case) Combine that with growing/normalized misandry and yeah it's making me hate being a man. I don't want to be seen as a member of the rapemonster gender but I also know that I will never be a woman either so I have to accept this. I wouldn't say there is anything feminine about me either so I can't cope as GNC male who would just get hated on anyway. I've had lifelong AGP but I believe if I lived in a world with no judgement of people based on their sex alone then I wouldn't have dysphoria. It's all about how people perceive you and how they act accordingly. I read about femrepper and also detrans women's experiences and it's shocking how similar I feel to them, just with everything flipped. It's almost like the very idea of gender is bullshit and all of this is folly. That doesn't mean I will treat people like shit. People suffering from this disease (gender dysphoria) deserve all the compassion they can get.

i feel sad

>>45096743
I think you're overstating the role social influence can have on this. I would honestly be fine being treated mostly the same as I am by default now, my dysphoria/agp just makes me hate not having a female body.
People perceive men and women as different because they are different. Gender roles are largely downstream from biology, and even if room is made for exceptions (as it should be), they are natural for the majority of normies and no human society will ever get rid of them entirely.
I think the "GNC" instead of transitioning thing is a dumb cope personally, I only really have a desire to be Sex Non Conforming. Being a softboy with earrings and makeup or whatever has less than zero appeal to me. My ideal life as a biological woman would be "GNC."
>It's almost like the very idea of gender is bullshit
I kind of agree, but I also think that it doesn't even actually matter in practice. Even if a transwoman with a very feminine body is still classified/treated/identifies as "male," I would obviously still 1000% rather be her than this shit. I think trying to block someone who has the potential to get a body they can enjoy and be comfortable in from doing so because it "upholds gender roles" or whatever is cruel and morally reprehensible.
Anyways, I really don't think getting into "gender critical"ism is gonna make you feel any less bad about being male if that's something you struggle with. Most of that ideology just boils down to extreme misandry being applied against trans people to justify treating them like shit for being outside of the norm.

>>45096940
have you tried drinking?

>>45097157
i have never tried alcohol

>>45097171
missing out desu

>>45097222
but the guy that made the funny shrek song died because of alcohol

>>45097232
he died because he was weak

any depressed reppers here? i don't see the point of living with or without dysphoria

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Life of a gen z is thinking that the only thing that makes life worth living is being hot and having sex and getting attention, being totally unable to acquire this and so spending the majority of your time on the internet torturing yourself with this fact, meanwhile applying to jobs that ghost you or going to schools that rip you off and give you qualifications nobody cares about while wondering why you have no friends or life experience at 28 years old until at some point you chemically castrate yourself out of desperate need for belonging and self esteem that will never arrive

>>45097813
isn't that literally all of us?

>>45097887
accurate except im planning on chemically castrating myself way earlier than that. i hope i dont wait until im 28

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>>45073372
skincare is for women

>>45073372
cerave sa 3 times a week for body and some retinol + Niacinamide and Hydro acid
>>45097887
this but at 25, it's been over

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I think I'm losing my straight male sexuality. think it's becoming only agp

>>45090579
wish it
want it
do it

>used be diamond and plat in rocket league
>log in after years of hrt
>cannot drive car

>>45098098
Say more? I might be in a similar position

>>45098098
>>45098403
That's why the next time I jerk off (I only get the urge to do it like once a week now) I'm going to imagine a heterosexual scene where I take the role of the man. We'll see how it goes.

>>45071368
>5’5”
>despite this I could regularly get with hot women
>agp coomer thoughts would always return
>now no interest in women
>get dolled up and occasionally see a guy (same guy)
>first I came while he fucked me and had no regret afterwards

Is it over for me?

>>45098637
I mean you can try. But eventually your dick just stops getting hard for it and you physically won’t be able to

>>45098347
Girls suck at video games

Dema the rules

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I'm tired bros

>>45098679
If you're satisfied just dressing up as a girl and getting fucked occasionally there's nothing really wrong with that.

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I keep having fantasies about being a teenage girl on her period cuddling my mum on the couch while I'm struggling with cramps.

>>45099036
I have similar thoughts too yeah.
It’s funny how that sort of stuff is probably the most insane and incomprehensible to normies out of all the AGP stuff, even more than the overtly sexual stuff.

>>45099072
Think is I still have a mum and I see her every week, so I could cuddle on the couch with her now, but I can't be vulnerable with anyone, not even my own mum.

Love my beard haha.....

>>45098870
>your dick just stops working
I thought using your dick for a specific purpose more often makes it not broken? The goal is to get hard for whatever woman I'm with without also imagining that I want to be her.

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>>45094761
To repeat myself, HRT won't unrape me or turn everyone into an anthro woman.

>>45099024
Feels kind of disgusting in my body then

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one day i will wake up as a girl, panicking and hair matted with sweat, but a girl nonetheless, my whole life thus far having been nothing but an extended datura hallucination

>>45099468
If you're debating transitioning seriously because it's something you can do then just try it and see if you feel better.

Only reason I repress is I tried transitioning already and it didn't fix my problems

>>45099513
How long did you do it?

>>45099564
Long enough to have gyno.

>>45098403
idk like, I just don't like women the same way. like it's kinda like I'm forcing it. but then I have fantasies about being the woman in sex and then suddenly it's like I'm fixed, and I'm very into it. it's over