>I heard you had a brain tumor Anonymous. So I spent the last week researching the cure for cancer and I found it. I’m willing to give it to you and the rest of the world under a few conditions. First you have to agree to marry me. Second you must renounce your faith in god and burn your copy of the bible in front of me. Finally you will become my new lab assistant forever. These seem like agreeable terms if it means sparing you a painful, agonizing demise.
>>43276761>I DECLINE YOUR TERMS, HERETIC
>>43276761Sci-Twi isn’t my first choice but…>Grabs a blow torch and a bible “…Can you keep the lab coat on when we fuck?”
>>43276761Sure, why not. Doesn't sound that bad.
>>43276761No.It will not be pleasant, but if it is the Father's will, I shall accept my death, and even take some joy in it,knowing that through it, as a result of this ultimatum, I will be giving glory to He who first gave me my life.
>>43276959Ok, Goku
>>43276761why do I have the sneaking suspicion that you were the one to give me the brain tumor in the first place.
>>43276761sounds reasonable
>>43276761>Lie about renouncing faith and do as she says>Go behind her back and get a new BibleIt's literally that easy, just hide it from her and she'll never know.
>>43276761>cure for cancer>even though brain tumors are almost never actually cancerouslol. what a retard.
>>43276761Haha dork no way>dies and goes to Equestria
>>43276959Tell me. Do you step out the way of a train? Or go out like an Indian accepting God's will?
>>43276761Euphoric post.
>>43276761>zaps u with a super encrypted brain cancer rayLet's make it less unilateral, shall we? If you fix your head faster than I fix mine, I'll do the things you listed; otherwise, you owe me a wish.
>>43276761There has to be easier ways to get you off than doing all this every time, babe.>"You know I have very specific fetishes. Now, less talking, and more book burning."Do you have to give me cancer every time though?>"You know I can't cum unless you've got cancer."
>>43276761Even if renunciation works the way you assume,>1 putting themselves in spiritual jeopardy for the good of allWorth. Also,>burn your copy of the bibleDo I look like some sort of qu'eer to you? Probably the easiest of the 4 things you ask, the least being husband to a shit waifu.
>>43276774Based
>>43276774Extremely based
>>43277911>less talking, and more book burning.I call bullshit. There’s no way Twilight would approve the destruction of any kind of book. Even a book filled with fake stories and imaginary gods.
>>43278823Ah but you see, this isn't Twilight, it's a weird alien that happens to have her name. Big misunderstanding.
