Why is the idea of an adorable pony prostitute so hot?What about them makes me want to hold their hooves, and brush their manes tails and coats.Something about a cute mare offering to absolutely degrade herself for my carnal desires in exchange for a little money just gets to me. I don't think I could control myself as she describes the various dirty things she'd do in exchange for a few bits, even saying that I can fill her mouth and genitals with my seed. Seeing a mare so desperate for cash that she'd even let me touch her, much less The things I would require to do to me is just so alluring.
>>43364933>Venus Spring Having A Bad Time
>>43364933*Rrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiipppp*
>>43364944Ah, those enchiladas...
>>43364995What?
1) no one in equestria would be impoverished enough to need to perform sex work. celestia is a benevolent dictator and goes out of her way to make sure all her citizens' basic needs are met. everyone has free housing and UBI2) prostitution would not be illegal, it only is in real life because of human retardation and our lack of snowpity. no truly compassionate and civilized society would criminalize it, there is no logical reason to. it's just a way for certain groups to control certain other groups, it's not rational or justifiable to criminalize it.3) equestrians would also not socially stigmatize sex work. ponies have sex like bonobos---freely and often, with anyone they feel like. stallions would not give a fuck if mares sleep around, they don't treat women like property. that is a purely human obsession from insecure men who cannot get laid. it comes from our women being selective and choosey, making pussy a limited resource, so men slut shame hoping to keep all the women for themselves (retardedly). nearly all stallions would easily get pussy however, because they are cute and nice and have horsecock, and because mares also nice and are happy to give sex to most nice stallions. ponies do not have such human bullshit. it's a free love, high trust society where polyamory is the norm4) ponies also aren't mean enough to abuse or disrespect a sex worker5) you will cope and seethe but i do not care and everything i said is objectively correct 6) kill yourself
>>43365066>polyamory is the normI can tell you are a tranny. You should kill yourself imediately and stop posting this utter retardation.
>>43365057They sure do make a person gassy, is all.
>>43365066>no truly compassionate and civilized society would criminalize it, there is no logical reason to. it's just a way for certain groups to control certain other groups, it's not rational or justifiable to criminalize it.degeneracy leads to fall of social order
>>43365097You forgot your starlight glimmer flag.
>>43365126No. Ayanami's seiyuu would not be alive today if not for me. Crime worthy of such sentencing? Thinking for herself. Now miss Ayanami, pull out that crucifix and prepare to be mine for the next four hundred years.>bill maher says new rules everypony Nipponese Lessons Every Week>>43365083
>>43365066Equestria is actually a. uber-traditional National Socialist paradise that has eradicated the evils of prostitution, sexual deviancy, and communism
>>43365066this
>>43365066>posting all this anti-love shit alongside a picture of CadanceNice subversion attempt, rabbi.
>>43365066How can casual, careless, constant sex be the norm and sex work still exist? To be able to sell something, there has to be demand, but there's not going to be demand for something you could so easily get for free
>>43365066>poly is the- ACK!
>>433650661) Money is not a feature of pony life. Goods and labor move between ponies by direct giving: the baker bakes, the farmer farms, the carpenter mends, and what each pony needs reaches them through the constant untracked circulation of everypony doing what they do.2) Celestia isn't real pony person with greed or needs, but embodient of magic of Equus,3) Prostituiton or porn aren't things, because in the spring, ponies sense with whom they will have healthy offspring. This is instinct — not a command, not a compulsion, not a loss of self. A pony feels a quiet, warm pull toward a specific other pony during the spring season, the way one feels drawn to a warm hearth on a cold evening. It is noticed, followed, and enjoyed, but never overriding.4) A pony watching another pony's fine harvest, elegant cutie mark, well-tended garden, or superior skill feels admiration, curiosity, or pleasure on the other pony's behalf. Nothing else layers underneath. There is no bitter aftertaste, no comparison, no measuring or abuse. A pony may spend an hour standing at a neighbor's fence watching her weave, entirely delighted, and walk home to her own work without a single thought of doing it better than she did yesterday.
Prostitution doesn't exist in Equestria because ponies will hold your hoof for free
>>43364933You have 100 bits to spend over the course of a month. How do you use them?
>>43365185Water slide! I choose waterslides!
>>43364933How many bits for the cute purple filly?
>>43365066>1Agreed.>2I guess.>3Fucking kill yourself.
>>43365237BASED! IGNORE WHORES, HAVE FUN!
>>43365164...is retarded coombrain nonsense, yes.
>>43365182I like your vision of Equestria, Chinanon.
>>43365131Genuine schizophrenia.
>>43365174NTA but there's a difference, if sometimes only in one's mind, between a dish you cooked yourself and the same dish made by an expert chef.
>>43365066Ancient Sumer had prostitute-priests who were trained in the holy art of love-making and accepted the company of any man for the sake of Ishtar, the goddess of war and fertility. There's no reason for Equestria to stick to the missionary position in the dark as the prude tradlarpers responding to this post seem to prefer (even though they themselves very likely never had sex).
>>43365185Heh. You sure you want to know the answer to that? I'm a real fucking sicko, anon. I'd use the money and get Scoot some shelter, clothes, food, and anything else she needs to get back on her hooves
>>43365331>they themselves very likely never had sexWell, duh. Ponies aren't real, Anon.
>>43365331>I'm a proud pansexual btw
>>43365327So the only sex workers are those with sex-based cutiemarks? How do they advertise their services? Does that mean they reject the "free love" model in order to generate scarcity of their services, or do they also engage in free, random sex?
>>43365340(Me)Another thing, what does it matter the quality of the sex? Sure, I get going to a 5-star restaurant because, chances are, you don't have the skills to make food of that caliber. But with sex being so freely available, what does it matter the quality? Are there ponies who are bad at sex, and as a result, don't get propositioned? Can these poor fuckers have their propositions rejected? Are there a bunch of ponies who are incels due solely to being bad at sex?
>>43365091horses have herd harems you retard
>>43365182somebow one of the less schizo replies in this thread>>43365166>having sex casually and making love freely is anti-love????????????
>>43365182>1) Money is not a feature of pony life. Goods and labor move between ponies by direct giving: the baker bakes, the farmer farms, the carpenter mends, and what each pony needs reaches them through the constant untracked circulation of everypony doing what they do.DYEWTS
>>43365340Some would share and teach freely out of love for their craft. Others would keep their leisure compartmentalized from their day jobs, not to create some gayass artificial scarcity but because that's how they like it.>>43365355Tbdesu I'm neither a restaurant nor a brothel person myself. But if I imagine myself in a restaurant and ask myself what the fuck am I even doing in there, the least unbelievable answer would be I wanted to stay in touch with the broader culture. It'd be neat to find in the menu some forgotten masterpiece that only my grand-grandmother knew how to make, or, even better, to find out that the dish I know and like is actually done differently and I WAS WRONG THE WHOLE TIME HOLY SHIT. But the main point is to avoid getting trapped in my bubble, to reach out to the universe.And then there's the medical niche. Any stong environmental influence, be it food, sex, massage of a hot bath, may in theory be used to balance bodily humors, soothe a weary soul, duct tape together a shattered mind, exorcise evil spirits and so forth. I believe this was the real specialization of Ishtar's holy prostitutes Gadgetanon mentioned above.
>>43365441>Others would keep their leisure compartmentalized from their day jobs, not to create some gayass artificial scarcity but because that's how they like it.But I'm asking how it can even be their day job. Pinkie down at Sugarcube Corner might make some mean cupcakes, but why would I go to her and spend money when I can get decent cupcakes from my nextdoor neighbor for free?>The second paragraphThat makes sense for restaurants and food, but I don't see how it applies to sex.>The third paragraphThat's all well and good, but why should I have to pay for these supposedly miraculous benefits when I could get them for free?
>>43365412>redefining love to mean just sexfuck off
>>43365454>anon cannot conceptualize the idea of loving multiple people
>>43365448>when I can get decent cupcakes from my nextdoor neighbor for freeBecause she's cool, I suppose. It seems like ponies enjoy interacting with her. Personally, if some higher power shoved me into Equestria as a pony right now, I would graze for years before I even try to pay for any food. Free food right on the floor, no strings attached, how cool is that? But that's me.>I don't see how it applies to sex.What's the difference? It also makes sense for museums and concerts and stuff like that. People don't go to concerts because mp3s are scarce or difficult to pirate, not at all.>when I could get them for freeWhoa, wait. I'm not saying any sex is a panacea. I'm saying a trained professional who knows what she's doing and is able to quantify the risks may use sex as a surgeon's scalpel. It's not something every mare out there can or will do, for free or otherwise. But it's also not something most ponies need. It's a separate niche that offers complicated solutions to rare problems, like demonic possessions.
>>43365378Kys only stallions have harems and in the show ponies are monogamous. E.G. Shining Armor and Cadence, Pinkie and Cheese, Big Mac and Sigar Belle
>>43365463Yeah Anon, cause love is fake. It was a viral marketing plot to help sell flowers, chocolates, greeting cards, stuffed animals and jewelry!I should know because nobody has ever loved me! So obviously love is fake!
>>43365577>People don't go to concerts because mp3s are scarce or difficult to pirate, not at all.But would people pay for concerts if they could get practically the same concert for free? >I'm not saying any sex is a panacea.Why not? Ponies are magic, who's to say that sex with any mare isn't as powerful as sex with this hypothetical sexpert? And if it's only a few mares who can do it, why wouldn't they do it for free? If they're in some insanely socially-minded society, why would it make sense to put anything behind a paywall? This is presumably their special talent, what else would they really be doing? It's like the greatest surgeon in Equestria choosing instead to stock shelves and only willing to save a life if they get paid. Nopony's gonna pay him if they can get the second-greatest surgeon in Equestria to do it for free.
>>43365577>I'm saying a trained professional who knows what she's doing and is able to quantify the risks may use sex as a surgeon's scalpel.Does Equestria send a pony in a green vest from OSHA to the bedrooms of ponies with sexual cutiemarks periodically to make sure their bedrooms are sex dungeons are meeting health and safety standards? Do you a require an eye wash station for rogue facial cumshots that might end up in an eye? Are ponies required to wear gloves and safety goggles during sex? A reflective vest in case somepony is operating a scissor lift on the sex site?Do sex worker ponies have to complete annual online training for sex safety including mandatory viewing of informational sex safety video tapes?https://youtu.be/Pr1ju6GoCsY
>>43365622Erm, that sounds like a lot of rules and stuff. Doesn't really vibe with that anon's communist utopia.
>>43364933Prostitution does not exist in Equestria.
>>43365066>[1]Based>[2]It wouldn't be illegal, because they would never imagine it being a thing>[3]Cringe and Gay>[4]This>[5][3] is not correct>[6]Based
>>43365066Explain Rarity then.
>>43365066What's the sales tax on hookers? Does sex work have it's own, unique tax? Are pussy prices regulated by the state or are they subject to the free market? How do you make sure no fillies are selling themselves? Is there a certification you need to be a prostitute? Is it like taxis, where there's only a certain number of whore licenses in circulation? What about pimps? Are they a thing or is being a prostitute only allowed to be a freelance occupation? Are they allowed to advertise? Do you need to show ID to purchase a hooker's services? Can I get cumdump insurance, where I don't have to be responsible for knocking one up? Am I allowed to use whores without insurance, or is it illegal like driving without insurance? Are there sex inspectors like how restaurants have food inspectors? Are pimps like general contractors? Do some hookers cater to fetishes? How would that work with permanent stuff like impregnation and amputation fetishes? What about refunds? Do hookers make you sign contracts where you have to agree not to persue legal action if you don't cum or the sex was bad? Have you thought even a single thing through, or are you just some filthy, hedonistic retard?
>>43365251Seconding this question
>>43365618>But would people pay for concerts if they could get practically the same concert for free?I don't know. To me pirated mp3s are practically the same concert for free, unless I can go to a concert with people I like and get lost in a forest, it's a whole thing. For other people paying may be an integral part of the experience. My 70yo concert-loving colleague is a weirdo.>who's to say that sex with any mare isn't as powerful It just feels wrong, you know? Breaking things is easy. Fixing things should be tricky and frustrating. If fixing things feels easy, either they aren't broken or somebody else implicitly handles the hard parts.>>43365622If we're going with >>43365331's temple prostitution theme, it would be mostly about keeping the place spiritually clean. A regular inquisitorial inspection checks for evil ghosts, residual negative energies and rogue scissor lift operators.
posting best whorepone
>>43365066but i don't want to have sex with several mares
>>43365681>pirated mp3s are practically the same concert for free>It just feels wrong>Fixing things should be tricky>If fixing things feels easy, either they aren't broken or somebody else implicitly handles the hard parts.Oh no....you're retarded.......
>>43365684too bad, get in the harem barn
>>43365684Monogamy is evil, patriarchal, and bigoted. Go have sex with whores, NOW!
>>43365667>What are the zoning laws for Golden Oaks Library? Which chapters of Equestrian law did Twilight have to sign to move in there? How does it treat Spike, as a pet or a child? What bureaucratic department decided that allowing a fire-breathing dragon in a treehouse is within the margins of insurance risk?Did Lauren Faust think about any of these very problematic problems? Was she stupid?
>>43365689>Mandatory sex>Ponies who don't participate in mandatory sex are euthanized before they become Incels... I guess volcels in this case and begin to adopt fringe ideologies that could be a danger to everypony> Anon goes to Equestria as a virgin.>Ponies begin to notice he's not having sex>ponies start giving Anon that knowing sad look as his days are numbered.
>>43365706Filly prozzies are back on the menu, boys! I'm cumming inside EVERY FUCKING FILLY FUCK YEAH!
>>43365706>People shouldn't overanalyze a kids show for fun because the writers didn't consider it because the show didn't focus on any of this.Stop trying to be the fun police.
>>43365706>This [headcanon] is trueWhat about [consequences of headcanon]?>UGH, that has ZERO basis in the show, CHUD!
>>43365683You'd saviourfag for her, right Anon?
>>43365723Explain the zoning laws.
>>43365731Maybe.
>>43365748The zoning laws are you have to ask Mayor Mare if it's okay and if she says yes then it's okay but she won't say it's okay if you don't say please.
>>43365748Now explain every single one of the questions asked in this thread.
>>43365752Rules in Equestria are that simple?
>>43365762Pretty much. If Celestia is chill with it, you can do what you want.
>>43365762That's basically all an elected official is, if you really think about it
>>43365713You can take sloppy seconds, I'm cumming inside them all first.
>>43365764That settles all the other boring questions in this thread too.
>>43365768>I'm cumming inside them all first>Posts the biggest slut in all of EquestriaAnon, I...
>>43365764>>43365771>The extent of bureaucracy in equestria is just celestia or your local mayor making a speech about what the ponies should do and then fucking off>The pony equivalent of Franz Kafka earns her fame writing surreal scenarios where government officials have to run their decrees through committees and inventing the concept of "paperwork"
>>43365778>Franz Hoofka was found curled up in the fetal postion in the corner of her bedroom after having heard a pony misuse "Hoofkaesque" earlier that day
>>43365774Who do you think caused her to become so slutty in the first place, Anonymous? You know naught of my power level.
Would prostitution be normalized? And if it's legal it wouldn't be seen as taboo. There are plenty of ponies that have cutie marks that's aren't super specific, like Derpy's bubbles, so they could help fill miscellaneous roles in pony society.
>>43365771>Celestia is not chill with hookers so it's not a thingVery cool
>>43365821Derpy's cutie mark is bubbles since her special talent is blowing "bubbles". Dinky is going to be an absolute pro by the time she gets her cutie mark since she's learning from the best, and every day is bring your daughter to work day for them!
Prostitution is 100% legal but only because it hasn't been explicitly outlawed, because ponies never even thought of something like exchanging sex for money, because ponies are nice and sweet and aren't filthy animals that have swallowed the propaganda of sex being a "need"
>>43365883>Prostitution is 100% legal but only because it hasn't been explicitly outlawed, because ponies never even thought of something like exchanging sex for moneyright>because ponies are nice and sweet and aren't filthy animals that have swallowed the propaganda of sex being a "need"wrongwhen they're horny and don't have a partner they just rape, it's legal
>>43365731I can't even save myself.
>>43365892>when they're horny and don't have a partner they just engage in their hobbies instead, it's legalFTFY
>>43365883BASED
>>43365892>when they're horny and don't have a partner they just rape, it's legalNo, they don't.
>>43365896one of the most popular equestrian hobbies is raping, yes
>>43365263>ChinanonI'm not Asian bugman.>>43365427Show is shit, I'm here just for cute silly ponies.
>>43365883TRUKE
>>43366683Then what are you? Russian?
>>43366750I already told you that I'm not Asian.yes...
>>43366972Russia is in Asia though so you're North Asian
>>43364933Because as a man your biological imperative is to inseminate everything you can? And you find it hot that a female would make a whole career out of being cummed in, like her whole reason for being and means of survival is to get fucked by you? Seems pretty straightforward to me. About as basic as it gets.
>>43366976Depends, part of Russia is in Europe.
>>43366750>>43366972>>43366976>>43367058Don't you thirdo fags use telegram for this gay shit normally
>>43367058Part of Turkey is in Europe too and it more western than Russia.>>43367060I use TG just for reading news.
>>43367060Seethe on, Americunt.
>>43364933>Prostitution in EquestriaCadance thread?
>>43367144She's married but it's the pink slut princess color scheme that makes it mandatory to creampie her raw
What's even the argument in favor of prostitution? Why should it be legal?
>>43367144>Cadance thread?Nah-uh. Cadance is a slut, not a prostitute. She does it for free and doesn't ask for money. Know the difference.
>>43367153On Earth it means some people who otherwise can't get sex can get it by paying for it. In Equestria there's no reason for its existence, since mares are not 3DPDs.
If>Cadance is a slutThen>Prostitution is illegal because it should be freeIf >Cadance is a monogamistThen>Prostitution is illegal because she believes it's wrong
>>43366972Are you Cock-Asian?
>>43365066>BonobosYou mean those same apes, where female higher in hierarchy will take child of lower female into stranglehold and force its mother to mate with male to get freebies from him? What a lovely bunch of "free-loving apes!">>43365182>springAh, the "I know animals mate in spring so horses must do the same" -retard.
>it's a cold night, under the street light.>There's a man who's pants and too tight...https://youtu.be/3omQikQYmgY
>>43367307that's a stallion
>>43367278>Ah, the "I know animals mate in spring so horses must do the same" -retard.Yeah, ponies should have porn, prostitution, divorces and other shit humans have, because god forbid a magical talking horse in a sun-goddess theocracy works differently from a bald ape from modern Earth. Seasonal receptivity it's a design choice that removes the human scarcity model that makes prostitution possible in the first place, retard.
>>43367204Damn, Cadance hates prostitution.
