Previous thread:>>43289275Welcome to the Thread! Kinderquestria/Anon in pone prison focuses on the world and adventures of naive child like ponies and the misadventures and shenanigans of Anon that results in him going to prison! To get a good handle on how things are done around here I implore you to check out our new and improved one stop shop of kinder greens and prompts here >> https://ponepaste.org/7630
>>43423063she do be a cute
>>43423378Batnana bread
>>43423386an accurate description
>>43423063So cute
>>43423804Thinkin bout humies...
>>43423063>Baticorn OC
>>43424164Twiggy poke
It's not even a holiday and yet the mares are booming. what do?
She comes bearing strange gifts
>>43426254I do not want them. Send her away.
Morn
>>43426265s splash like that is truly hell for a nerd horse
>>43427064Keep that water away from the dreamcast!
>>43428031what kind of shenanigans is she getting up to?
>>43428031Is Trixie Skywalker about to blow up the Death Mare?
>>43428214>>43428187She invented FTL-capable fighter jets just so she could be faster than Rainbow Dash (Rainbow Dash immediately bought one so they're tied now)
>>43428616lore accurate
>>43429038Fluttershy's big natural pomfers
>>43429525I want to grope and stick my face in Fluttershy's fluff!
>>43429525L-lewd!
>Anon won't take his cootie shots
>>43430363would let her inject me
Boop
>>43430952she's very talented
>>43431163And balanc-ed
>>43432958I'd give her head pats
>>43430812
>>43433249But those arent edible
>>43434569true but they are good for the soul
>>43435077a very huggable one none the less
PWEB
Postbed
Evil has been vanquished
>>43436258Let her eat cake!
Filly scouts!
>>43437624I spy a cute little duckyhors
>>43438025bonbon detected
Boopa
Peetzer
>>43439123Want
>Bechdel McMiggens is MINE!>No, MINE!>MAH!>MAH!
>>43439737>meegan
>>43440328We're mostly veegan, meegan
another heat wave is pegging my ass so have a college twilight
>>43440985twi dork
>>43441386:D
Bep
>>43442057
>>43442312>>43442961>>43443519lotta anonfillers
>>43444530*sticks her on a coatrack*
>>43445552stronk fil
the simple joys of a walk on the trail
>>43447032smoochable
>>43447032Twiggy in the wild
8
>CONFOUND THOSE PONIES NEXT DOOR!
>>43448056Old man yells at cloud
Board too fast
>>43448666she tonking
refreshed bloom
boop
>>43449330boop
>>43449773Based
>>43450192Based on what?
>>43450814Actually I do
>>43451029Derpy unstoppable
>>43452319I want to pet Twilight's flank and run my fingers through her tail!
>>43452319twiggy loaf
>>43452908kek
What has her so excited?
>>43455051It's devastatingly effective
pweb
Neen
>>43456363ate
>>43456899Eat
>>43457860filly stampede
>>43458857Why is she boxed?
>>43459734>It's actually root beer>Still gets her drunk
>>43459740Well duh, it's got beer right in the name
pwebb
>>43462154a murder in broad daylight, no wonder why she was sent to the moon!
9
>SCP - 536>Object class: Safe>Description:>SCP 536 is a leather pouch containing a set of 15 metallic rods, collectively referred to as SCP 536-1, and two bent, flattened metallic shapes, henceforth referred to as SCP 536-2>The pouch is made of genuine leather, and by tanning analysis, it was determined to be cow's leather, stitched together with a hard to replicate sewing pattern, as it seems the entire spool is threaded through the stitch each time. >All instances of SCP 536-1 consist of a relatively straight metal rod with a bent, curve, or saw-like deformation at the tip.>SCP 536 is completely mundane, aside from its superequine ability to open closed doors or locks and extremely precise craft.>See Addendum 1 - Usage, for more information. >Containment Procedure:>Due to its inert nature, SCP 536 can be kept in a standard safety storage box in whatever site it is deployed to.>No more than 3 keys to this box are to be produced at any one point, and must be distributed to O5-3 RTY, Head of Foundation Research Anonymous, an the agent designated to use SCP 536.>Notable Uses:>Opened Princess Celestia's Vault after she locked her keys inside.>Opened O6-1 TS's Pretty Purple Pony Princess-grade lockbox.>Bypassed the magilock in one of GoI HAND's safe-houses.>Opened [REDACTED]'s containment chamber after agent [REDACTED] got [REDACTED] in a [REDACTED] testicles obliterated [REDACTED]. Agent [REDACTED] survived the ordeal and made a full recovery.>Addendum 1 - Usage >SCP 536-1 or "lockpicks" must be used in tandem with one of the two SCP 536-2 or "tensors" whenever required.>A "tensor" is placed on the bottom or top half of a keyhole and pushed counterclockwise. At the same time, a "lockpick" is used to manually push the keyhole pins upward to their released position.>Once all the pins are in their released position, the lock pops open as if a key, or unlocking spell was used.>Simultaneous use requires near-superequine dexterity, and thus can only be performed by trained pegasi or micro-manipulation-specialized unicorns, as tensing too much, too little, or not wielding the "picks" properly inhibits the process.>Addendum 2 - Deployment:>Due to its completely mundane nature, SCP 536 can completely bypass any magilock on a door, up to and including Solar-level magilocks, such as the ones in Princess Celestia's vault.>Active users must be overseen by no less than 2 agents that passed the keychain test (1).>(1): Agents are given a set of 10 numbers to remember, then a set of jiggling keys are shaken in front of them for 10 minutes. Test is considered passed if the agents can recall all 10 numbers, or if they succeed in ignoring the keychains altogether.
>>43464241I like the implication that ponies are inherently good lockpickers but never invented tools to do it
>>43465742Blep
>>43465742
>>43466510WANTED for spreading extremism, 2 counts of adult onset infancy, and blowing raspberries at a strip club
>>43467268
>>43467304oh no they are screwed
prior to retiring to my bedchambers
>>43468443>not capslockOne job
JANE THE CUDDLER IS ON THE LOOSE AGAIN!
Posting red-eyed celestia in honor of my eye being itchy for no discernable reason
>>43471301Kek
Pobb
>Applejack could, in fact, eat all those fucking apples
>>43473959fatjack
>>43474180>not fatpplejackOne job
>>43467304Cutie mark carjackers
>>43474180>>43474555You're both wrong, it's obviously Applefat
>>43477050Mibble
Inspired by >>43472566 in the Spitfire thread:>"MEDIC!">You're running before you hear the shouting.>Nobody could've missed that fall, but one of the team still flies up to you anyway.>"Doc! Doc, quick, Spitfire crashed! Do you have your doctor bag? You do, good. OK, it's just this way, yeah, okay, you're heading in the right direction...">You wave away the concerned pegasus floating around your head as you jog towards the crash site.>You're Doc Anon.>Not actually a certified doctor in this or any other reality.>You had some basic bitch first aid training on Earth, which means that here you're qualified to be the Wonderbolts' primary field medic.>Although 90% of your medicine consists of band-aids and headpats.>The other 10% is just keeping these little dumb balls of hyperactive joy entertained while they sit in hospital.>Initially you made an effort to learn pony anatomy and shit just on the off chance that one of the cute little fuckers actually managed to break something, but you quickly realized there wasn't much point.>Not only is all of their medicine just a bunch of placebos and shit to make ponies feel better from their little ouchies, there doesn't seem to be any risk of real injury.>Crushing, burning, freezing, terminal velocity, deafening volumes, explosions... nothing seems to kill them or cripple them for very long.>They don't even seem particularly bothered by it half the time, treating third-degree burns as a minor annoyance.>You remember when Rainbow Dash crashed into that tree. Under conventional physics, her wing should've been ripped clean off, or at least pulverized to the point of needing some serious reconstructive surgery.>Instead, the wing was entirely intact, just kind of... misshapen.>The cure was bandages, juice boxes, and bedrest.>Of course, Rainbow being Rainbow, that was still almost impossible, but she got through it and was soon flying again like nothing happened.>Since then you've seen dozens of crashes from the team, with similar results.>You're not entirely sure if they even have internal organs, they seem to just be made of magic and sugar and spice and whatever.>No matter what happens to them, they just slowly return to normal.>It's like a combination of Wile E. Coyote and the T-1000.>But that doesn't mean you can't take your job seriously.>Despite their invulnerability, ponies are fearful, and if there isn't an authority figure in a white coat there to tell them everything is going to be alright, they can be prone to panic.>And right now, panic would be very bad.
>>43479068>You're at the Equestria Games, in the middle of a big arena filled with hundreds of ponies.>Technically not a Wonderbolts event, but since easily half the competition are current, former, or reserve bolts, you were the obvious hire.>Captain Spitfire was just about to win the gold for the big race when she suddenly spiraled out of control, landing near the edge of the stands.>You suspect foul play, since Spitfire rarely takes a tumble, and that one shifty-eyed pegasus was getting all up in her airspace.>Ponies may be as sweet and innocent as little kids, but kids can still be cruel, particularly if there aren't severe consequences to their actions.>You've still got a job to do though, and as you get closer you can see most of the bystanders look downright horrified.>A few look like they're about to or just did throw up."Stand back everypony, let me see the patient.">You give your best commanding voice, always helps quell panic.>The crowd starts to disperse and holy SHIT!>Blood!>That's blood!>Granted it's not remotely the amount of blood you'd expect from a creature that just did a nosedive at 200 kph but still!>The short trail of blood leads to a yellow leg with a long cut.>Easily the worst injury you've seen in your time here.>It looks slightly worse than that one time you skinned your knee real bad.>But what really takes your breath away is Spitfire.>She's on the verge of sobbing.>In a world where your average citizen has the emotional maturity of a chihuahua and the professionalism of a tiktok influencer, Captain Spitfire always stood out as one of the few ponies that you genuinely respect.>She went hard on her recruits, and pushed them to be their best.>She took safety seriously.>If somepony on her team screwed up bad, she'd cut them loose instead of giving them yet another "last chance" like most do.>She seemed to be the only pony there that actually did all the paperwork she was supposed to do.>Sure, her language was still G-rated, her idea of a harsh punishment was a dozen push-ups, and she could never resist the allure of free candy, but she was still a tough lady who never showed stupidity or weakness in a reality filled with both.>So seeing her with watery eyes and a trembling lip, in full view of the entire world no less, gives you a pang of heart-wrenching sympathy that you haven't felt for these little cuties in a long while.>You rush towards her, stepping around some weird-looking debris lying around that must've gotten smashed up in the crash, looks like the remains of some kind of stand."Hey, look at me, everything's gonna be fine."
>>43479072>She nods shakily, staring at you like a drowning man seeing a life raft.>"I-It h-h-h-hurts.">She blinks away the tears in a frenzy, refusing to let a single drop spill from her eyes."I know, but I'm gonna make it better. You're being a very good pony.">Her wings flutter a little bit as you call her the magic words.>You open your bag and pull out an emergency lollipop, then quickly stick it in her mouth.>She relaxes a little and you inspect the wound more closely.>It looks pretty shallow at least, shouldn't take too long to heal.>You look over the rest of her for any other injuries, and you note the locations of a few other bruises and scrapes that didn't break the skin.>Strangely, the cartoon lumps that they tend to get are absent."Okay, it doesn't look too bad at all. I'm gonna bring you back to the med tent to dress this, you'll get a lot more suckers while we work, and then maybe some of my special supply of cookies when we're done, how's that sound?>She nods. Her eyes are still filled with tears, but you can see the corners of her mouth raise a little.>You take a scrap of cloth out from your bag and loosely tie it around the leg.>It's not a proper bandage by any means, but it should stop any other ponies from panicking at the sight of blood as you carry her back."Now then, ready for upsies?">Another nod.>Normally Spitfire was tough enough to scoff at the notion of upsies, yet another sign that she's in really rough shape.>You pick her up like a large dog and start to jog back.>There's some polite applause as you leave, and Spitfire tucks her muzzle under your arm.>You're not sure if she's shy about being carried or the tears that are slowly but surely staining her face.>Back in the roomy tent, you gently place her on the surprisingly comfy exam table."There we go, how're you doing?">After a quick glance around to check that you're alone, she lets the mask drop a little bit.>Tears flow freely and she starts to whimper quietly.>The lollipop stick falls from her lips.>"I'm-m s-sor-ry.">It's a little hard to make out the words that she pushes out between choked sobs."Hey, it's alright. You're doing so well, you're a very brave pony.">You tenderly pet her mane with one hand as you prep a box of apple juice with the other.>"N-No I-'m n-n-ot.">She scrunches up her face in pain as she hesitantly sips a bit of juice.>"I'm s-s-suppose-d t-be s-strong... I-I can h-handle c-c-cuts."
>>43479077>She's not wrong, Spitfire was one of the few ponies you knew of who could claim to be a survivor of the much-dreaded papercut.>But then if anything was to make her cry, it would have to be the worst injury you've seen a pony get.>"Ever-y-thing w-was f-fine, it was j-just a r-rough landing... then I got th-at s-tuff on m-me...""Stuff? What stuff?">"Th-The stuff from the ch-checkpoint.">She sniffs wetly, and you silently pass a handkerchief.>One very loud nose blow later, she continues to explain.>"I cra-shed into the th-ing they u-use for uni-unicorns to st-stop m-m-magic.">"Th-Then that blue s-stuff got all over me and it... it... it HURTS!">She finally lets all her pent-up pain loose in a loud wail.>"I started bl-bleed-ing, an-and ev-er-y-thing hurts SO BAD!">She leans into you as she starts to bawl.>You hold her in a tight hug.>You remember seeing those checkpoint things, they're supposed to stop unicorns from casting magic and prevent cheating.>They didn't seem to hurt, just prevent active magic use for a while.>But pony durability and healing has to be magical, right?>Somehow, that anti-magic stuff must have prevented Spitfire from tanking what ordinarily would have been just some ruffled feathers and a halo of little circling birdies.>She might be the first pony in who knows how long to experience real pain, completely unfiltered by any of the magic that keeps these goofy little dumbasses happy and intact.>And she still kept up a brave face for her team and her fans."There there, you've been a very, very brave pony.">You pet that pony as hard as you can."Now, I have to clean and bandage the cut, and it's gonna hurt some more.">You pull back a little to look her square in the eyes."So I want you to promise me something: I want you to cry as much as you can, and have as much juice and candy as you could ever possibly want.">She starts to shake her head.>"I-I have t-be t-tough-""Nope! No toughness! No more bravery! Doc's orders. You be as much of a little foal as you feel like being.">You pet her muzzle, wiping the tears from her cheeks."You've done the hard part, you've been strong for everypony else, but now it's time for you to start getting better, and everypony knows that when you hold in tears, or resist having sweets, it ends up making you feel sicker.">She nods, and starts sipping her juice again.>You take out two items from your bag you never thought you'd have to use: gauze and rubbing alcohol."Now, you hold on to my arm with your other hoof, just like that, and when it starts to really hurt, I want you to squeeze my arm as hard as you can."
>>43479081>You tend to her wound, as gently as you can.>Spitfire nearly crushes your arm at times, and she goes through many juice boxes and lollipops, but she doesn't scream or thrash around, as you feared.>You fumble a bit when tying off the end of the bandage, but it's finished.>Spitfire has her head buried against your coat again.>You tap her on the shoulder."We're done now. You did a really good job.">You softly rub an ear as she looks at you with tremendous gratitude in her eyes.>"Thanks, Doc.">She hasn't let go of your arm yet."No problem, you're free to get back to your friends, I'm sure they're wor-">You stop in shock as she steals a warm kiss on your cheek.>Her own cheeks grow red, but she keeps your gaze with a bashful smile.>And she's still not letting go of your arm.>Point of fact, she's wrapped more of herself around it."Seriously, thanks, Doc.">She nuzzles your shoulder tenderly."I gotta be tough for the others, but I know I don't have to be tough all the time.">She swallows roughly, and her smile flickers.>"C-Can I be... not tough? A-Around you? More often?""S-Sure.">It's your turn to gulp nervously."We can... do a thing? Away from work?">Her tail wags once.>"Awes-uh... great. Thanks again, Doc.">She leans in again, seeming to aim for your lips this time, before kissing the other cheek and zooming out of the med tent in a sudden gust of wind."Guess she got some of that magic back."
>>43479084Common spitCHAD green, nonny!
>>43479068>Be me>Notice green>I'll read it later>Later>4am>I'm sure I can->5 postsReminding myself to read this tomorrow or in bed on my phone lol, based writechad
Postbeb
>>43479084hell yeah based green delivery
>>43479068Boop and apology (you) I still haven't read this but I swear I'm going to, got caught up writing for another thread and then a fren pinged me for dying light action
>>43479068>>43479072>>43479077>>43479081>>43479084Holy fucking based that deserves a (you) for all five posts, sorry for blueballing you
>>43479068I can’t wait to read this at marefair still
>>43482945Lil shids
spread the good word of the thread to anons at mare fair with my lil buttons, i hope they can see the cute kino in store for them
>>43483901Defender of the faith
>>43484919tonk pone
>>43485085She's tonka tough