A friend calls you out of nowhere and asks you to come over immediately, they say it's direly urgent.After you arrive, he says to you “Buddy, I am deep in debt and I don't know how to get out.”You’re immediately shocked. He has had the nicest place you've ever seen for as long as you'd known him. A mansion that would make international billionaires jealous. Aside from some typical family feuds, he has had a wonderful home life as far as you've ever been aware. Concerned, you place your hand on his shoulder. “What's going on, man? What can I do to help?”Silently, he motions you towards his house. You walk inside, and it's still very nice. But you definitely can see things are starting to fade. The paint is chipping. There are some cracks beginning to show in the walls that indicate the foundation is starting to break.“My kids are going to public school now. I can't provide them with anything they ask for, really. They want to go to a school that teaches them more, that's more engaging. My daughter's had a cold for weeks, and we can't afford to take her to the doctor.”He motions you to follow him to the kitchen. He opens up the pantry and the fridge/freezer for you. You see nothing but cases of soda, boxes of cereal, TV dinners and frozen pizza. “I can't afford anything else.”You're shocked. “D-did you lose your job?”“No, I’m making just about as much as I ever have, honestly.”“Well, where is all the money going then?”He is silent. He motions you to follow him once again. He starts taking you downstairs into his basement. As you get to the bottom, the ambience has completely changed.You find yourself looking down a 200 foot long, steel walled tunnel. At the end you see a giant door that looks like a bank vault, guarded by 4 men who practically look like Secret Service Agents.You're in shock. “W-what? What is this?”Your friend is still silent and begins walking towards the enormous door at the end of the tunnel. You follow him.
>>538648285As he opens the door and takes you inside, you feel your knees almost buckle.You're staring at what looks like a compound almost twice the size of his house on its own. You see a wall filled with guns of every type you can imagine, some you never even would've thought up in your imagination. There are miniguns all through the place. You see missiles, and a tank.“Why… why do you have all of this?”“It's home defense. I need to protect what I have.”You're speechless. “Who do you think is going to take any of what you have away from you?”“Mexicans have been moving into the neighborhood. I'm in debt to Chinese loan sharks, and I don't trust those Middle Eastern guys running the convenience store down the road.”“You actually think they would try to attack you? Have they even threatened you?”“Well no, not really. We've all gotten into some very heated arguments a lot though. I don't like the way any of them act and I've tried to let them know to follow my rules.”“But, they are them.” You say. “They're living their own lives. You can't just tell everyone what to do, and even though you are… I don't think you've got to worry about home invasion. You could ditch the bodyguards and the tank at least and still be… absurdly over prepared. Then you could feed your kids some real food. Put them in a better school. Take your daughter to the doctor, for Christ's sake. I mean, fuck, you could afford to be giving to more charities, changing people's lives, getting them out of debt and still have three quarters of all of what you have now.”He sighs. “My friend. You don't understand… this isn't about any of that. I'm worried about my debt because — I need better defense.”You don't have to be liberal to see the insanity.
Does anyone read this shit?
>Hey sonnet write me a story about the absurdity of rightwingers and guns. I'm from reddit BTW if that matters.I replied. Interesting bait because its so fucking stupid.
>>538648381Nah, most probably OP is telling us what a massive faggot he is and how much he loves niggers.My advice to op is to wait for nightfall, take knife from kitchen , murder family and then kill himself
>>538648285In all honesty he may want to back off on the doctor visits and the retirement plan a little bit. Thats where most of his money is going
>>538648318>>538648285coping migger fantasy fiction
>>538648381I skimmed, even that wasn't really worth it for anything but the "punchline", which was lame and trytoohard
>>538648285>A friendAt least make your LARP believable.
>>538648285Kikes owe whites 40 trillion and were gonna collect in blood
>>538648381No its a fucking retarded thread full of projections, written by a 6th grader to deliver some fake and gay loaded question, boring ass lame rhetoric, or present a moral milestone thats drowned in a sea of useless pebbles used to construct whats supposedly a cobblestone path of coherence, but rather reduces to rubble and garbageThats what this thread is; retarded garbage
>>538648285>retard can't even greentextcringe>>>/r/eddit
>>538648930Hes trying to use a literary device of describing some conspiratsrd stereotyped neighbour as analagous to the USA budget, and fleecing his racially diverse neighbiurs as economic engines of say us treasuriesWhere this collossal fuckibg retsrd larp falla short is the fact that thebfederal reserve has their own trading desk at wall street, we only ever see whats written ON THE BOOKS as far as a budget or spending goes, and the fact the USA has had the money printer and thereby first movers advantage- all this surely deconstructs the absolute faggot retardation moral relativism inside OP's retarded ass story and claimsNo, we havent had a real functioning economy for over a centuryWe cant even begin to discuss the fundamentals of how that works when people still fail to comprehend the simplicity of deception involved from top down orders of magnitude, the sheer inconpetency of it all, and the anount of lemon head lackeys that keep the cogs running whilst being too fucking stupid to realize the ones pulling the strings went off the rails over a century agoTip of the ice(((berg))) and its a long way down of educating midwits out of their "formerly once was" cognitive dissonance and disinfo propagandized brainlettes
>>538648381lefties love lefty memes
>>538649929this idiot isn't a lefty since lefties aren't the main ones making every coping excuse in the books for why people are broke right now, a lefty's metaphor would have ended blaming Trumpinstead he's never even alluded to, so this is some false flag migger bullshit
>EM dashFuck off chatgpt
>>538648930The hypothetical friend would destroy the average 4chinner>but I don't have a friend>You have a friend in this story anon, now how would fee->B-but I don't have a friend!?!>anon I...>>538648381No and I hope nobodies does.
>>538648285>>538648318You forgot to mention the part that he isn't spending half his money on defense, he's spending half of the 15% that remains after giving 25% his money to the bank for interest payments and 60% his money to his rich parents and poor people so they don't have to spend their own money.
>>538648285whoaniggadoyoureallyexpectmetoread.jpg
