>advertising or begging

This is actually a poop stories thread. post poop stories.

>im gonna voooooote
Ngmi

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>>544135101
Basado

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>>544135101
Good luck never getting your imaginary trumpbux, miggercuck.

Oh, one more thing. You might want to cope and rope when your side loses Texas, Michigan, north Carolina, Georgia, Iowa, Ohio and Maine to the Democrat blue tsunami.

>>544135101
Republicans are going to lose anyway I'm just not going to vote desu

>>544135101
I'm voting you're mum
With my dick

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>>544135135
>be me
>be at work
>innawoods, waiting for surveying crew meeting
>attempt to fart
>shit
>panic
>mainly confined to underwear
>remove poopy underwear
>throw in a tree
>run pantsless to the county road to look for something to clean my ass
>find wet Arby's bag
>jackpot
>clean myself best I can
>survey guys show up
>they have no idea

>>544135135
>be me
>constipated for ten days
>finally, the time came
>bowels churning
>drive to Culver's
>run to bathroom
>heaving, straining, sweat dripping from my face
>consider reaching around and pulling the shit out of my butthole
>turd finally exits
>it was like my forearm
>turd acted as the plug for the rest of the creamy brown mess that followed
>so much poop
>I'm talking like two gallons
>don't bother flushing
>leave in triumph

>>544135135
>be me
>at a hockey game
>go to restroom to shit
>take a shit
>wipe my ass
>somehow, poopy toilet paper missed the bowl and strayed into the adjacent (occupied) stall
>guy obviously saw the poopy toilet paper
>shuffles his feet away from it
>I reach under the stall
>I say "MINE"
>grab the poopy toilet paper

>>544135135
>be me
>in living room at college house with roommates
>one yells LOOK AT THIS
>he flops onto his back, legs up in the air
>he shits himself
>screams FUCK
>runs to bathroom
>he later explained that he only intended to fart

>>544135135
>>544135596
>same house
>landlord was a fuck
>right before we left, I clogged the toilet with socks and we all took a shit in the toilet and left it

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>>544135101
MIGA

>>544135135
>be me
>2 years old boy
>some lady takes a dump at our house
>doesn't flush
>The poop is white
>ask my mom about the white poop
>she says nothing

You don't need to, Trump is going to use the Post Office and ICE to keep power.