>>545320870nice try pigger
>>545320870I bribed government employees once.
>>545320870What's the most retarded data mining thread that you ever made while thieving my tax dollars via an SSI check?
>>545320870I stole spice from the Hutt cartel. Some Rodian bounty hunters are after me.
>>545320870It is sin of living alone Watching on internet people with out pants diddle genitals I eat cookies from grandmas jar and never admit itIn my sweetest dreams I walk with a gun and killing jews
I spanked my monkey
>>545320870not paying for a plastic bag
>>545321173>Reddit spacing >Complaining about women not hooking up with him. >Violent fantasies >Memeflag >Broken englishSaaaar
planning the murder of the greek spammer
stole a balloon
>>545320870Called a fed on 4chan a nigger and told him to tounge my anus.
I illegally downloaded an album for free a day before it went up on streaming. SOMEBODY STOP ME
>>545320870Suicide.
Drive stoned, now I'm cyberstalked by masons. The two thing's aren't related at all
>>545320870Breathing.
Dont respond dipshits
>>545320870Was on the FBI's radar for cyber threats.
>>545321282kek a hot air balloon?
>>545320870Stealing in a hardware store.
>>545320870>posting nudity on blue boards>racism outside of /b/ and /pol/>trolling
>>545320870i tore the tag off of a matress once.
something bad happened to me and i cursed God like never before and i regret it every day
>>545321699MMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSS
>>545320870For some reason when I was <5 years old, I used to just walk into people's homes. I never stole anything, I was just curious. Broke into the landlord's house and he was obsessed with these little stone angel statues.
>>545320870Drove over a cyclist
>>545321266can i come
>>545320870Shoplifted stuff worth atleast 50k+ over the span of 5 years. Food mainly.
>>545320870IT GLOWS SO BRIGHTMY EYEEEEES AYEEEEE
>>545321699savage
>>545320870I haven't thought about it in years and I feel like I actually didn't do it and it was in a dream.I'm not going to say what it was.
I shot Kennedy, it was me.
>>545320870When I was 7, I ate a gummy worm without paying for itI felt really guilty for a year straight and acted in my best behavior in all other regards. Then I admitted to it a year later and my mom was like “tell the truth sooner next time and you won’t have it rat you up like that”
>>545320870I'm an economic terrorist and have murdered hundreds of video games, movies, and tv shows by not spending any money on them. I WILL strike again>ps greek niggas need to kill themselves
>>545320870Nice try, FBIhttps://youtube.com/shorts/zeQ8Xb-Hbw0?feature=share
>>545320870I destroyed the entire universe and reset time so that nobody would know.You won't believe me so I can admit it.
>>545320870>Firing off my Glock 19 on my property in my backyard on the 4th of July, everyone thought it was just a firework, no police came to investigate the gunshot. I shot up into the air towards the sky.
None
>>545320870They forgot to charge my chips and drink for my Chipotle meal, so instead of it being like 20 dollars i only paid 13, didn't say anything and walked out
>>545320870I used to drive escorts and I beat the shit out of a trick that slapped on of them bitches. Bounced a 24 of crown off his head and we gtfo. >all of this is satire btw
>>545322237hell yeah the more the merrier when it comes to murdering the idrama labs faggot
>>545320870>burglary (stupid but justified and completely confined to minecraft)>assault (justified, and in minecraft)both in late teenage years
Apparently insulting pajeets on 4chan is against US law. This shithole is filled with shit eating pajeet jannies and mods.
>>545320870I have 64gb of RAM, but I'm only utilizing some of it.
>>545320870In the UK. I borrowed my friend’s pocket knife without a license. Still kind of freaked out with myself to this day.
>>545320870I sometimes don’t put the shopping cart back and just leave it in the parking lot
>>545321575>erbärmlich
>>545323093"Hate has no place", they said."Hate only begets more hate", they said
>>545323226To be fair we need to deposit a dollar coin in the cart and I forfeit when I commit my crime
>>545320870you don't get away serious crimes unless you're a psychopath or something similar and lesser crimes are just rules for slaves and if you follow all of them there's something wrong with you
>>545321243nice try kike
I said nigger on the internets
>>545323093untermensch piece of shityoure probably brown/mutted
>>545320870I post off topic threads
>>545320870Decades ago (long past the statute of limitations) my friend hotwired an excavator and a front-end loader and we drove them around.
I piloted one of the planes on 9/11. The one that was supposed to hit the White House. I turned it around and got back home instead.
>>545320870STILL haven't paid for WinRar or mIRC
If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret.
>>545320870Hi FBI
>>545320870I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.
>>545320870Not really a crime per se but in high school a party i was at got busted and I started a foot chase with two cops. Apparently I was running backwards berating them for being too fat to catch me. I dont remember it much.
>>545323704I have always wanted a chance to run from the cops on foot.
A plastic bag flew out of my hand on a windy day and I was too fat to go chase it down
>>545320870Allowing jews to win. A crime I didn't even know I was committing.>evil wins when Good men arent taught shit by their slave community who is invested in all the wrong shit. Sportsball. Church. jew education. Etc.But sadly, I had to figure shit out on my own too late in life.
I shot a man before throwing him out of a plane.He didn't fly so good
>>545320870
>>545323800I always chase down my litter. I actually spend a of time picking up trash. Now that I think about it, the most serious crime I actually committed was picking up a bag of trash someone had thrown from their car window when I was running and throwing it back through their sunroof. They got out of the car and threatened to shut me lol
>>545320870I’m white, so I guess this thread is not for me.If you’re white and does not abide by the rules of civilization, you’re a shitskin nigger and deserve death.
>>545321182>I killed a bunch of people once https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mghbVdoQv8
>>545320870The worst thing I ever did wasn't technically illegal. I gave someone advice that, at the time, was perfectly sound...or so I believed. My cousin according to my relatives was in a bad relationship with some guy who they believed was an asshole. I had no reason to not believe them.They asked me to convince her to move back home and leave the guy.I did.Later she drove my uncle to work and got into a fatal accident. She died. My uncle lived.I wish I had never listened to them.I wish I had stayed out of it.They knew she would listen to me.I should have refused.I know it wasn't really my fault, but I can't help but blame myself anyway.
>>545320870i ran a red light once, it keeps me up at night
>>545323778It's a 10/10 coming of age milestone, doing grafitti and going to house parties as a youth gives you a lot of opportunities
>>545320870I was waiting at a red light to go straight and saw the left turn signal turn green out of the corner of my eye and for a second I thought the light to go straight turned green so I let off the brake for a moment to get ready to go forward before realizing my light was indeed still red but my front tire crossed slightly over the white line. I lose sleep over it every single night, I'm considering turning myself in to the police just to finally deal with this nerve wracking guilt I feel 24/7.
>>545320870Back when eBay was a thing. I listed a Quomio laptop for $3000. They paid and I deleted the listing and my account. Did this a few times until the FBI came knocking on my parents door
>>545320870I dreamt I had committed a murder once and woke up believing I actually did it. Turned out i was just generally stressed out at that point in my life. Engineering school can be quite stressful.
>>545324301 bruh, why you copy my answer? are you indian or something?
>>545324203I'm sorry. I can understand why you blame yourself but you have absolutely no reason to do so. It would be like a chef blaming themselves because a patron choked on chick pea or something. The loss of life is always hard, and it's exponentially harder for loved ones, but it is not your fault.
>>545320870stealing your heart<3
>>545320870killed somebody
>>545320870Killed and raped hohols in Bucha
>>545320870Rape.Not a joke.
>>545320870I've been driving without a license for 25 years. Often drunk.
>>545320870Bribery
>>545321225DUDE WHAT THE FUCK
>>545324491Didn't we all
>>545323778You don't need to have committed a crime to do it. You can just start running when you see them and imagine that they're chasing you. I suspect none of the chases with cops I remember from my childhood were real we just ran away because we felt guilty and were scared shitless.
>>545323704I used to know this raging alcoholic mess of a dude and one time he led the police on a foot chase, and when they finally caught him it turned out he'd run away for no reason and they'd only chased him because he started running.
>>545320870I killed a CIA nigger by running him over on 9/9/99. I was being followed by agents and freaked out. It's okay to run-over space aliens.
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