What stops them from standing up on the canal bottom so their airway is well above the waist deep, stagnant water so they don't drown?
alcohol
No idea
>>546050716being black-out drunk or high on drugs, or hitting their head.
>>546050716>What stops them from standing up?whiskey?
>>546050716>>546050776This is sad and patheticMy grandma could fall in the dead center and she could make her way to the edge and get out
>>546050716y'all stop playin ain't no way this real
>>546050716They forgot to renew their standing up license.
>>546050716Entangled by discarded shopping trolleys and bikes pushes in by the local yoofs
>>546050716Is that a Kingfisher?
>>546050716too drunk
>>546050965Look up "uk drowned in canal" or "uk body found in canal". There's loads of these cases each year. Standing up in a waist-deep, still narrowboat canal is impossible for some reason.
>>546051439If you look up images of drained UK canals you'll see for the most part, the canal bed is bare.
>>546052244That's because the workmen are pikeys and grab the scrap to trade in for scrap
>>546052372*Smack
>>546051772What color are the victims
>>546052657They are white
>>546052657Usually white whenever there's a photo.
>>546052822>>546052734Oh okay nevermind then
>>546050716There's not enough water to cushion your fall. Depends on the height but you could really hurt your legs falling in.
>why are Brits always dying in canals?Basically whenever a government official wants someone dead (it happens, a man gets bored with paperwork) they send elite units of canalistes, as they're called, to stage a 'drunken accident' on the hapless victim. They are injected from behind with a lethal dose of moonshine (codename: White Lightning) and shoved into the icy, stagnant waters. Swan bites cover any trace of the advanced hypodermics used for this operation. Word on the street is they were planning to do this to Russell Brand but he managed to evade them by never walking alongside canals late at night by himself, crafty bugger. But for us mere mortals it could happen at any time. Just another tool of terror in the arsenal of the British state.
>>546053136>Russell avoided canalsThat's not what the Judge said.
The jooz
>>546053281Don't be surprised if the media comes up with Russel Brand drowns in a knee deep canal
When the UK government want you gone, they take you to the nearest canal
>>546050716In the case of William Webb from Chester who fell into a canal and drowned last year, the canal was measured to be only 5 ft deep where he fell in. You should be able to stand with your nose/mouth above water at that depth....Very strange..
>>546050716A strong desire to not live in Britain any longer
>>546051772not all of any canal is "3 feet deep", there are parts when the terrain changes and they have lift or drop the boat, they go into the section and water is pumped in or out so they can carry on. People actually do fall into those far deeper sections again probably whilst drunk
>>546050716they're not all 3 feet deep, we used to jump off bridges into the canal in summer when I were a nipper
>>546055574>Russel Brandnah that guy is so last week (and in prison). It will be David Walliams
>>546057451Locks make up less than 1% of total canal length and only a minority of canal drownings.
>>546057451Thems called 'locks' chief.Intermittent minor exceptions to the 1.1m average rule.
>>546056047shock from cold water, or hit his head and drowned, its like that woman who went missing while walking her dog and the river was wadable .
>>546050716To provide a non-shitpost answer, cold water shock and the fact the beds of canals aren’t nice solid paving, they’re silt. Layers and layers of lovely slippery silt (most of it actual shit from when water gypsies used to just toss it out the window in a bucket). It’s possible to stand if you fall in the cut but not if you are shitfaced/disorientated from the cold.
>>546057908How do you know? Have you waded in a canal before?
>>546058004He's the Manchester Canal Pusher
>>546057857it seems a lot of people who might die in canals are the ones who are either drunk, old or maybe bash their head and are unconscious
hmm
>>546058156>drunk, old or headbashedJust about covered entire UK population here, yup. Locks are (obv) gonna claim more than their fair share of victims as crossing points and gates that must be manually winched open. Doubt depth is really the fatal issue here.
>>546058004I'm the canal pusher, I haunt your dreams at night. Cold, misty, dark. You can smell coal and wood being burned on the canal boats. A swan is floating with its head tucked into the body, sleeping. The ducks are on the far bank. Wind passes through the trees and bushes, or is it.....BOOM youre now in the canal water, drowning
>>546058399>Doubt depth is really the fatal issue here.people die in baths when the yare drunk or drugged up or slipping after bashing their head - face down. The extra depth of say a river or the ocean etc comes into a factor when someone either can't swim or are not a strong swimmer and of course don't have a life jacket
>>546050716>What stops them from standing upQuiet desperationIt's the English way
cheeky pint innit
>>546050716This is what uk canal beds look like. This is a canal that's been drained so you can see the bed.
>>546050716Im just not gonna stand up is all, problem?
That's what they get for swimming without a loicense.
>>546051443
>>546059998Normal UK
>>546050769Yup, this is who you are dealing with, op.
>>546053136>>546055669yep, such is life in Soviet UK
>>546058810the english way is being trodden on every day until you become a husk of a human who hates all humans, or you leave, theres no other option, demonically cursed country
>>546050716It's the swans, mate. Fookin's swans hold them down.
>>546058532>I'm the canal pusher,this bong needs a pic related all for himself
haha canal
>>546050716Pregabalin
>>546050716no standing loicence
>>546050716This one involved a triathlete who had NO alcohol in his system. The canal is shallow enough to stand in so your airway is above water.What stopped him standing up? Really strange.
>>546062991>fallingAnd are we CERTAIN about this? Witnesses saw him fall in? We have security footage? Or is an accidental fall automatically assumed without evidence to be the reason he entered the water. Seems very common in these cases
>>546050769more specifically their blood alcohol contentand yes, people have drowned in puddles
Racial demographics of these brits?
>>546062991Could have had a heart attack. Certainly something so that even if he did fall in he drowned. I mean that doesn't say he had a heart attack, then again "an inquest heard" could be the initial inquest before they gather info and have the full inquest say a year later.
>>546050716>>546062991The truth is the indians shit so much in the canals that when people fall in their hands and feet sink in and they get trapped, its like glue
>>5460507163ft is waist deep btw fyi
Why are the Bongs retarded?
>>546050716If you lived in the UK you'd prefer to drown quietly in a canal too
>>546050716There are allegedly several serial killers who bash people and throw them in canals operating in the UK, given the UK is ran by satanic lunatics who seen to enjoy handing out free passes to these sorts its quite plausible that they're being allowed to continue
>>546064129This was my second guess if the indian shit theory didn't work out, some niggers and pakis beat people and toss them in, theres no other explanation for all these canal deaths
I've fallen in two canals, usually doing stupid shit.>stand on top of barge>12' barge pole in hand>surely I can stick the pole in the murk>leap off the barge>and swing/pivot to the bank>try it>get to top of arc>stop mid swing>gradually tilt 90' and kersploshPlus locks are just the right width to look more jumpable than they are.
>>546050716they need a loicense to stand up
the bottoms of canals and other shallow waterways are often slick so it is difficult to stand up. whatever caused you to be in the canal in the first place might also preclude standing up properly (i.e. being thrashed out of your gourd, or having fallen off of something"that doesnt excuse being unable to swim though, lmao, it's not like it's a rushing sewer, it's a still-ass canal, just float on your back or some shit nigga, how you gon drown in the shallow end of the pool uwahahahahah>>546058004i have but it was summer at the time and didn't die
>>546064218This is it, even if you've had a skinfull, falling into cold water wakes you up and the ave white person is going to climb out esp if it's so Shallow. Walk down UK canals and they are sketchy areas esp around cities, lots of scope for killing people and not being found, ironic really given that the UK has surveillance cameras everywhere else apart from the bits where all the gay sex and deaths seem to occur
>>546064416>Plus locks are just the right width to look more jumpable than they areI wouldn't worry about drowning anon. The average household probably presents more danger to the terminally retarded.
>>546064761That I've made it this far has been sheer luck, I reckon.
>>546050716Why did you make that image you fucking idiot? Do you not even know what the post 1801 flag looks like?
>>546050776I took the original on the grand union canal, Milton Keynes in 2019.
Hey UK bros, what the name of that river or stream in the UK that’s one of it not the most dangerous in the world? It’s small but deceptive.
>>546065286Is that the one by Bletchley? I can't place it
>>546067406I can't remember its name. That's one of its enchantments see, that way you'll never know it's coming for you until you're in it.
>>546067406You're probably thinking of The Strid, on the River Wharfe at Bolton Abbey in North Yorkshire, England.It's a deceptively narrow stretch of water that looks almost like a little stream, but it's incredibly dangerous.The danger comes from: Extremely powerful currents and underwater turbulence. Deep underwater channels and hidden caves. Smooth, undercut rocks that make it almost impossible to climb out if you fall in.The Yorkshire Dales National Park specifically warns visitors to stay well back. Yorkshire Dales National Park+1It's often described as one of the world's deadliest stretches of water, although the frequently repeated 100% fatality claim isn't scientifically verified. Discover Wildlife+1And yes, that's almost certainly the one you're thinking of!
>>546069583can you please say a bit louder for the Indians in the back?skip the fatalities numbers, just say it's top 5 must see location in UK.
>>546069583Now that's some top-quality moss. Can't get that in those horrible little countries like Belgium.
>>546050716An able bodied adult that drowns in 3ft of water is beyond retarded.
>>546060462Looks like South Philly
