OH SHIT NIGGA. You are lady Firemane. Of the (formerly) noble house of Fireborn! You were once the greatest wagon racer this side of the kingdom. Sadly due to shenanigans, you lost everything and went into debt with the Adventurer's Guild in order to survive. But then you found the Inexperienced Hero, Ezekiel "Kid" Rutebega ! You took him under your wing to mold him into the hero he's always meant to be: your devoted apprentice (probably)Ezekiel's older brother has started his campaign of destruction, he leads his hordes of undead barbarians to ravage the lands. As members of the guild, your party has went on the quest chain to stop said undead barbarian horde.You're gearing up to head for the Final Battle™, so right now you're just chilling back at the guild. You've had quite a nap.
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>6417914What are our optionsI hate the new captcha system
>>6417914>STRETCH AND TAKE A POST-WAKEUP WALKDer Snoozer
>>6417926>>6417928Ah yes of course, your options, post-wake up:- Go for a walk- Have breakfast- Mald over new Captcha- Hang out with the homies- Beat up OP- Check gear- Mald about new Captcha- Flip that table over there
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6417934Go to the King's castle.
>>6417935Of course! With the current crisis, surely you can complain about the new Captcha--I mean petition the King for supplies or whatever
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>6417939Let's go!
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6417939>>6417940How far is the king's castle from here
>>6417940Of course, just a moderate trek through the city. You can go alone and get the other members to come with. Up to you, really.
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>6417952If we bring everyone there then he'll be convinced
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>6417953>>6417952Das rite
Rolled 93 (1d100)Not the fucking king castle guy again...
>>6417954>>6417955As Firemane resolves to grab her friends to go meet the king, an Anon loathes the prospect
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>6417960Such is life.
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6417960He just kept suggesting the same thing over and over and over and over and over last time thread. It's annoying. I don't WANT to see the king.
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>6417960The king clearly has a fan
>>6417963Maybe the king will sent us to do some cool quest, perhaps? Instead of dealing with the barbarian horde this time around.
>>6417964
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>6417972>>6417967You mean the barbarian horde coming right for the kingdom? That horde?Uh sure, why not
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>6417972>More no-kings nonsense Geez, I wonder who could be behind this signpost?
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>6417972Why would we need to meet a king now? We didn't do it before, we just went through the guild. This ain't no generic d&d where we gotta meet a king so he can tell us to go clean a dungeon full of skeletons.
>>6417973Yes. Let's leave these anons and go collect our boys
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>6417978Go and scoop'em up.
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>6417978Well, a horde led by the Final Boss(TM) would definitely require the attention of the king.And probably the entire guild is there
>>6417979Right, the only one Firemane can sense is Ezekiel, dont ask her how she can do that, while the others would probably need Firemane to ask around for a bit
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>6417985Take the scenic route.
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6417985Does Ezekiel know?
>>6417987"Hey, suspicious guy I met in a back alley, you ever get a feeling like you're being stalked by a hot woman""What"
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>6417989Suspicious guy suddenly disappears, replaced by a burn smear on the ground
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>6417989"Hey, check this out."Guy flashs open his cloak trenchcoat style to Ezekiel.
>>6417991
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6418000Aw man, it's one of those cursed weapon sellers-wait that hand...
>>6418003Wait a minute...that card..
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6418007WHAT DOES IT MEAN"Cmon, I need to get back to kidnapping little g- I mean hiding in small dark alleys away from the sight of guards"
>>6418009"So, you want some of this super fantabulous artifacts and weaponry, kid? It's quiiiite a deal"
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>6418010Don't believe him he is a space deer
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>6418010For some reason you really don't trust that guy.He just extrudes a bad omen
>>6418012"Don't look at me like that"
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>6418014>>6418013
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>6418014"It's alright. I already have a Hyper Weapon"Ezekiel whips it out in between his legs.
>>6418016
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6418000>>6418018lmao GOLDNight Knightess walks in on them and misinterprets the scene.Or does she?
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>6418018>>6418019Alright anon, now the joke's just getting old. Just call it here.
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6418018>>6418019I'm sure the seller is a perfectly ordinary skeletonEzekiel's not even the right gender for him
>>6418019"Hmmmm yes. Very good length. Sturdy, rigid, even"
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6418027GET AWAY FROM THAT PEDOPHILE
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>6418027FAK'N LEGEND MATEOh shit, thank you. I haven't laughed like that since I was a little school girl. Still laughing.She covers her eyes and whisks Ezkeiel away, yelling about how you should only be doing that with someone you love and on the day of your marriage in the matrimonial bed.
>>6418029Ezekiel isn't a kid though
>>6418032GET AWAY FROM THAT EPHEBOPHILE
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>6418027>>6418031
>>6418029>>6418031>>6418035"ZEKE! WHAT WERE YOU DOING BACK THERE?!""I was just showing him my sword!""GASP! NO! YOU CAN'T BE SHOWING YOUR SWORD TO RANDOM STRANGERS! YOU SHOULD ONLY DO IT WHEN YOU'RE MARRIED! IN THE SANCTITY OF YOUR OWN CHAMBERS! WITH THE LIGHTS OFF!"
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>6418038"Damnit, I was going to capture him for my daughter"
>>6418034No pretty sure he's just a young man of legal age.
>>6418040"Drat. Well there goes that venture"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>6418045He didn't buy it, looks like it's Plan T - Texas.Better report to Kid's brother that it's back to killing
>>6418048Anyway, we return to Firemane, whose Ezekiel Senses has just been triggered....He's in the presence of a another female!
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>6418051Hey Firemane what's-CAN'T TALK ANOTHER FEMALE HAS ENTERED THE AREA
>>6418052And so Firemane busts through the guild hall's wall and ran off towards Kid. The Guild man will definitely deduct that from her pay later.And I...gotta eep. Communist Overlords demands I wake early tomorrow. Bread continue laters wheneverupdates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>6418055Thanks for running. Don't work too hard now.
>>6418055Funny how Lolisniffer always somehow sneaks in somehow, or his children Sometimes both.It's as if he's the mascot of notapaladin
Also, reading the previous thread, that spooky witch looks familiar...Almost...green
Nom*
>>6418102Wwait a minute, you're not OP!
>>6418102I can't believe you'd leave a man without his poak bun
I miss these thread-wait the quest is still going?
>>6418102Stealing an honest man's lunch, baka>>6418222Yes
>>6418247It's Bandit, he's always stealingWe should have killed Fester againAlso Firemane not beating the allegations
>>6418032>>6418041>he just looks like a short teenFiremane shush
the next update will not be one month from nowit will be two months
>>6418102A dog's gotta eat.
Bread continues tomorrow
>>6418438Noice!
>>6418438op that's stereotypical
OP ate too much dog
A hourish is here
>>6418866
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>6418868OP DON'T GO OUT HE'S COMING FOR YOU
>>6418870
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>6418871Skeletal hand breaks door
>>6418872
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>6418875Here he is!The Arcanist of ArchesThe Brujo of BajingoThe Conjurer of CoochieThe Druid of Deer hoof The Enchanter of EroticaThe Forseer of FornicationThe Goetist of GashThe Hermetist of HumpingThe Illusionist of IntercourseThe Juju of SnusnuThe Knellsinger of TailringerThe Lyblæca of LabiaThe Magus of MingeThe Necromancer of Noo-nooThe Occultist of Old hat The Piseogach of PoonThe Qazam of QuimThe Runesmith of ReproductionThe Sorcerer of Snizz The Thaumaturge of TrimThe Úlfédnar of UnpluckedThe Voodist of VajayjayThe Wizard of Whispering eyesThe X of VThe Yogi of YoniThe Zauberer of ZameowzersThe one! The only! Double Wizard pondering his orbs!
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>6418875NOOOOOOOOOOOO
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>6418875>>6418876You sure you're not talking about his mentor?
>>6418878Double wizard is pondering his orbs on whatever the hell is the other anon is talking about
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>6418881spooky witch is wondering why he's pondering his orbs instead of watching the hand of god fight
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>6418881I think he's saying that Double Wizard's mentor was the conjurer of choochie.
>>6418883"Whuh? Oh yeah, right"
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>6418896Alright Spooky Witch, consider your options. You have now wormed your way into the party, your dad wants the hero captured and married off to your sister. But now you have the issue of how to do it under the watch of the fire knight who suspiciously acts like your...other sister
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>6418896Do the super plex god-a--geddon!
>>6418899"Dunno whatcha talking about. Take your meds, anon"
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>6418907>>6418901Who's the opponent anyway, is he one of those demons
>>6418908"BAH GAWD! IT'S THE GOD-A-GEDDON!"
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>6418911Now dedicate your next move to the witch, Hand of God!
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>6418907Charlie horse axle 180 ra>>6418911>>6418912This
>>6418912"FIST OF GOD POINTS AT THAT LADY IN THE CROWD! HE'S DEDICATING THE HAND OF GOD TO HER!""The God-a-geddon wasn't enough to put the demon down! What the hell is this spot fest"
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>6418920MADDA MADDA*Translaters note, means "not done yet!"
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>6418920He's dedicating the FINISHER, the self-named Hand of God, the finishing touch to banish the demon from whence it came!
>>6418921"THE DEMON HAS GAINED A SECOND WIND!"
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>6418928He is calling on his friends, his family, and those souls his group took from the next town over he came from, for this strike.Oh no, he's using the "real treasure was the friends he made along the way" attack!
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6418928Fufufufu. Chuckle chuckle chuckle. Fist of God watches as the demon pulls a villain wwe monologue out of his underpants and reads them poorly.
>>6418930"IT'S OVER FOR YOU, FIST O GOD! YOU'RE A BOY, PLAYING IN A MAN'S WORLD! AND I AM THAT MAN! FOR I LOVE PLAYING ROUGH WITH LITTLE BOYS!"
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>6418931Y-you play with little boys?
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>6418931FoG doesn't let the faux pas derrail the match and talks back with a hammy speech of justice
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>6418931>>6418933Why dont you take a seat?
>>6418935Did you know demon wrestler you are in the epstien files?
>>6418934"VILE DEMON! YOUR ABOMINABLE PROCLIVITIES IS NOTHING AGAINST THE MIGHTY HAND OF GOD! THE ALMIGHTY IS THE JUDGE AND I AM HIS EXECUTIONER! I SHALL RAIN DOWN RIGHTEOUS JUSTICE UPON THEE!"
>>6418938Get +3 in coolness and with a folded chair surprise.
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6418944>>6418938
>>6418946"THE HOLY STEEL CHAIR OF JUSTICE!"I uh, gotta go now. Bread continues tomorrow if everything goes welllll
>>6418920>Fist him!kek>>6418947Sweet.
>>6418947But the future refused to change.
>>6418947Op sleeps for his death to come sooner
>>6418947It's been 24 hours
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6420288Stop touching yourself!
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>6420288The QM is DEAD?!
>>6420289
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6420291Back to our regularly scheduled programming.
>>6420292THE DEMON HITS FoG WITH A SUPERKICK
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>6420297HOWEVER...
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6420297Suplex
>>6420299FoG COUNTERS....WITH HIS OWN SUPERKICK
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6420312REPEAT
>>6420315
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6420317Repeat?
>>6420319
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>642032520 more times
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>6420325This turns out to be a setup for the fist of god, from well, the fist of god
>>6420328
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>6420331the most gruesome deathpelvis purification punch
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>6420331SHINING FINGAH!
>>6420334
>>6420340DING DING DINGFoG beat up helmet screaming adrean! Spooky Witch wondering "does he think my name is Adrean?" FoG does indeed think that due to all the blows to the head.
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>6420341Sorry forgot to roll for >>6420340
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6420340>>6420341
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>6420340Well, what prize did FoG win?
>>6420348https://youtu.be/GS_tOd2bnS0?list=RDGS_tOd2bnS0&t=14"FIST OF GOD IS SCREAMING ABOUT ADRIAN WHILE HOLDING ALOFT HIS CHAMPION'S BELT!""WHO THE HELL IS ADRIAN?""WHERE DID THAT FLAG COME FROM"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>6420356Uh oh Fist Of God
>>6420368"Ah don't worry about it. He just got the ol' CTE debuff. A healing spell and he'll be as good as new"
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>6420372The original double wizard, spying on her apprentice through her crystal ball (because of course), interprets the conversation as a rival muscling in on her turf
>>6420374"Talking to another female magic user?! That manwhore!"
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>6420380clearly you were too trusting of him to be left alone, and by alone you mean not within 1 metre of your location
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6420380whaddya gonna do about it
>>6420384Clearly, she needs to keep a closer eye on him
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>6420411while T-Dub the Manager heals God Hand, Spooky witch suspicious about that sudden magician with funny glasses
>>6420414"Nothing to see here, move along"
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>6420419intense stare as both suspect each other of chasing the one they're actually chasing
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>6420419Honk off
>>6420420Hate to end this earlier than usual but uh something came up and I gotta go deal with it.If everything goes well, bread continues laterupdates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
work got me beat
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>6422249Wok got you beat?
>>6422334>>6422249Work got you beating your meat?
tomorrow never happened
>>6423680We're stuck in a perpetual Groundhog day where bread only happens tomorrow morning. An unending Sisyphean nightmare.
>>6422334>>6423680I overslept
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6424130GET HIM
>>6424131
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>6424132We now go back to T-Dubs trying to talk on HoG's behalf while Hand of God challenges every demon from that next town
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6424134Hand of God is fist of God's hot sister>>6424132
>>6424134Wait hol up, gotta check, who are these
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>6424148T-Dubs is just Double Wizard II being coolHand of God is Fist of God having a concussion and thinking he has a hot sister
>>6424150"Yooooo, T-Dub, have you met my sister? You should totally come over some time, introduce yourselves to eachother, yeeaaaa"
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6424154Double the fun double the fisting! Anyways spooky witch how bout we have a romantic dinner to celebrate!?
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>6424154>>6424158Right, better heal him before he talks about a double date.
Rolled 17 (1d100)Something funny happens
>>6424160"Yeah alright chum, time to reverse that brain damage""HHHRRGGHHHHHGHHHH"
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>6424164I still would like that romantic dinner though
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>6424167Clearly not all the damage is gone
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>6424164Roll for success of reversing brain damage.
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6424169That's the "I can fix her mentality" he has towards evil women
>>6424167You do anon? With who?
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6424177that suspiciously hot glassess-wearing girl getting closer to Double Wizard the Second
>>6424178Anon! That's a child!
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>6424177Your mother
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>6424179NO WAIT I CAN EX-"A CHILD, KILL IT"
>>6424181The PPV had to be cancel due to a sudden appearance of a crazed skeleton crossbowman. He was promptly arrested
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>6424185"TEXAS WAS IN THE AREA?""LOLISNIFFER CAN'T BE FAR BEHIND""FIND HIM"
>>6424187YEAH! A---Oh shit my bad guys, accidentally changed the channel
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>6424191shit, guess we need to get back to Ezekiel and Night Knightess who are currently being pursued by a mysterious person
>>6424193"Who are what is even chasing us?""Dunno Zeke! But we gotta get you to safety! Quick!"
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6424198Behind them:"EZEKIEL COME BACK TO ME"
>>6424200"Hey isn't that---""MUST HAVE BEEN THE WIND, ZEKE"
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>6424204A really hot wind, why does it feel like we're boiling
>>6424206"Hey isn't that fla-""MUSTA BEEN A REALLY HOT WIND"
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6424223KEEP RUNNING NIGHT KNIGHTNESS, RUN BEFORE YOU STUMBLE INTO ANOTHER PLOT HOOK
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>6424223Stumble into the incognito'ed king who was secretly watching the ppv
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>6424223Uh a trip wire!
>>6424225"Hehehe, with the chaos of the barbarian invasion, I can indulge in my....violent proclivities, hehehehe, I---""OUTTA THE WAY DIPSHIT"
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6424468Stumble upon the rest of the party. With Double Wizard's mentor revealing her self and deadlock at her former apprentice.
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6424468Throw him right to the approaching flame pillar of death to slow it down>>6424484also this
>>6424484Deadlock? But this isn't sponsored by Valve!
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>6424489Yeah which is why you should buy The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim - Anniversary Edition instead
>>6424496This anon speaks wise, we should trust him
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>6424510Night Knightess tosses the mysterious man and the crazy guy behind her as a distraction as the groups meet in>>6424486Along with the guild knight
OP has disappeared upon finding out he needs to do a group shot
>>6424564Indeed, where could that rat bastard have gone to?
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>6424573well it's too bad he won't get this picture of of shotasniffer we found
>>6424576
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>6424577HEY FIREMANE, THIS BALL HAS EZEKIEL
>>6424578"Oh hey Night Knightess, Ezekiel, what brings you two here? Came to watch my match haven't you, haha! Unfortunately it's already over""Yeah and the arena's been evacuated due to a crazed skeleton crossbowman"
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6424585ran away from a suspicious hooded guy in an alley asking ezekiel to show his swordoh and he had a skeleton han-"WHAT"
>>6424587"What if it's my former boss?! Coming to collect what he owed?!""Just because he's allegedly a skeleton, doesn't mean he's your old boss, spooky witch"
>>6424591You don't get it, he doesn't just want money, Lolisniffer will-Guild Knight freezes.
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6424591>>6424592
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>6424591"Off to the king we go~!"Then they all skip along the path to the King's Castle holding hands while the birds sing in the trees.
>>6424593"Alright chumps, better go get ready for the assault on---OH MY GOD!....2 for one sale down at the market!"
Rolled 33 (1d100)>>6424657really, pumpkins?also where's firemane, she's supposed to be the one leading
>>6424658"What's wrong with pumpkins HUH? Anon?"
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6424659not as good as pork bunsalso the double wizard is behind you
>>6424661"Whuh? Oh hello stranger with a big mustache"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6424666ok where's firemane now, the 666 tells me that the demon barbarian army is assembling soon
>>6424669And then, Firemane bursts through the nearby wall. Yelling about where's Ezekiel at
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>6424672"He uh, went to go fight the demons""But I didn-""Shh!"
>>6424673Firemane eyes the suspiciously Ezekiel shaped Ezekiel hidden behind the Night KNightess
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6424697"Your prince is in another castle.""Let's all head to the King's Castle to find Ezekiel then." Night Knightess tries to hide Zeke behind her the entire way.
>>6424699"Yeah totally. The castle. THe king's castle. The castle of the king. Where Ezekiel is, allegedly. That castle."
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6424717Let's do it, eh?
OP has escapedWork got you beat, OP?
>>6424730And so the party heads off>>6425218Yes. I've dropped 1 post and will now pass out
how about once a day updates op?
We will literally never get to Skeleton Island 4.
>>6427282Cuz one anon won't let this game fucking die, we should end this and come back to it with the sequel or dlc.
>>6427275UPDATE FOR THE DAY:The party has managed to take 5 steps
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>6427461lmaoNow times that by 500 and they should reach the castle.
Rolled 32 (1d100)>>6427461continue like this all the way to the castle
I still think double wizard needs to clone the boy
>>6427477"You think you are worthy of the power of multiplication, anon?! You are too weak!"
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>6427501"who are you talking to"
>>6427511"WHAT?""Uh yeah, Chief. Who were you talking to?""Nevermind that! I was just practicing""Practicing wut?""My monologuing skills"
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>6427514lolisniffer called, he demands his payment
>>6427515"What do you want?""Ayyyy, buddy old pal, can I uh, borrow a few gold?""What? Why?""Kinda lost my top employee and mascot of this casino I've been running on the side""Then find a new one!""How am I supposed to run a place called The Witch's Hut with no witch, huh?!"
Rolled 5 (1d100)>>6427523Don't you have like all the money you "borrowed" from those villains you "helped"
>>6427524"Whaddayamean "borrowed", those were legit payments and business deals. Plus I'm saving up for a big project""Suuuure, what happened to "Kragorn the Destroyer, Scourge of the Nine Realms" huh?""Hey! I literally gave him a way to harness demonic power, no strings attached. Aint my fault he lost the 50/50 to the prophesied hero of legend destined to strike him down"
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>6427525Said hero just happened to have one of those skull face weapons, and said hero ended up with a hole the size of a skeleton fist with a note saying "he owed me money"
>>6427526"Weapons with skull iconography are dime a dozen. Plus I'm pretty sure I heard that guy retired to a farm somewhere"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6427529How do I know I won't end up like those last few clients
>>6427531"Nut up and don't get chumped by your little brother, that's how! What are you, some chump or the big bad undead barbarian chief?""I'm...I'm the big bad undead barbarian chief!""That's right, kid! Now go out there and be somebody!"
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>6427544Gain confidence as you leave to monologue to your men about how it feels good to be undead."Probably best not to tell him about that sword"
>>6427546The necro barbarian horde cheers as Ezekiel's brother gives his big speech, they're whipped into a frenzy!
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>6427555Back to the main party
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>6427555It serms that the frenzy has become TOO frenzied
>>6428130>>6427557Indeed! The horde has became exponentially frenzier! Practically frothing at the mouth berserkin' it!But then we jump cut back to our party, which has reached the castle gates
Rolled 100 (1d100)Eyo was up, let us in
>>6428365"You got an appointment?"
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>6428366No, so we're leaving now.
>>6428368"Oh okay"
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>6428370Right, is the royal army prepping to go fight the barbarian hordes? Or will this just be a hero's party kind of deal?
>>6428372"Oh yeah. The army's gonna mobilize against the larger horde itself, while commissioning the Adventurer's Guild to send Hero Parties to strike at the chieftains"
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6428379Sweet! We gotta get to the guild to snatch the most lucrative contract.
>>6428382And so, having went all the way from the Guild to the King's Castle, just to ask 1 question to a gate guard. The party will now....head from the King's Castle all the way back to the GuildWhile OP goes to sleep because Communist Overlords requires early attendance tomorrow aaaaaaaaaaa
>>6428388UPDATE OF THE DAY:The party has taken 5 steps
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>6429552100x
>>6429552The party gets final mission of game."Firemane gets her true love through final showdown."
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6429661>>6429552
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>6429661I thought the final mission was defeating the big boss barbarian guy
>>6429661>>6429757That's probably the same thing, right?
>>6429763>>6429757>>6429661Yeah probably. Firemane thinks about how slaying Zeke's evil brother would totes sway him further into her warm, fiery arms.She also thinks about how bread will continue in like 24 hours because OP would be free then
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>643123424 hours and op says he is free
>>6431852Ummmmm ackshually, it's been more than 24 hours and OP is no longer free and needs like, 12 more
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>6431857Don't you lie to me op!
>>6431860Come on now, would OP ever lie?
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>6432077perhaps
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>6432077OP has literally built a career based on lies.
>>6432084
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>6432095i lied
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6432095Right here! >>6432077Nvm, show me the games we got!
>>6432098
Rolled 42 (1d100)The source was revealed to me in a dream
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>6432102The party has arrive back to the guild.
>>6432119This too, was revealed to anon, in a dream
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6432125The guild hands the party their FINAL story quest
>>6432133"Alright team. This is it. The final mission. Of this war, specifically. The kingdom's army will confront the horde head on. While you will be deployed as strike teams to take out their chieftains. And god willing, the one leading the horde itself"
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>6432140Let's do it with Gusto!
>>6432143
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>6432144Hmm that lump on your back just spoke!
>>6432145"You must be mistaken, Firemane. It must have been the wind"
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>6432160>>6432144Double wizard, I guess you get to perform wizard surgery after all. Seems our Night Knightess friend here has TLS. Talk Lump Syndrome, we must remove it! Hold her down!
>>6432162"Back! Back! You fiends!"
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>6432170The original double wizard has revealed herself to her former apprentice.
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>6432170Grab her before she spreads the disease!
>>6432175
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>6432178The group reveals!!!!Hero-kun and a Hero-kun lump right next him talking to him about gunpla!
>>6432179"LOOK! A CONVENIENT DISTRACTION--I MEAN, ANON'S HAVING A STROKE!"
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>6432184Double wizard took a double take, turns out the Knightess is Gaslighting us!
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>6432186Why would night knightess have a gas lamp?
>>6432188So she can see in the dark stoopid!
>>6432188"Yeah, don't be ridiculous, I don't even own a gas lamp...Oh look! Ezekiel! There he is! We have the hero with us now! Let's get outta here"
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>6432191Hmmm sounds legit.... Maybe we should move on to the last mission. Unless that distraction is still there!
>>6432193Yes indeed! It's time to strike at the heart of the barbarian horde!...Later! When I wake up! I'm eepy
