Firstly, alcohol/ethanol is a drug, a carcinogenic solvent, and technically a micronutrient. But anyway I'm curious what is your relationship with this drug? For me, I just cannot understand mine. I KNOW, I KNOW it's life ruining poison and yet at these times I just get this intense desire to drink. And when I drink I blackout every time, and I wake up with the most CRIPPLING anxiety. Like absolutely extreme anxiety to the point I need to drink, just to control it. What happened 3 nights ago is I brought some k-pins just to chill, and on the way home I just really had this intense desire to drink as well. I had been doing so well too. But I went in and brought those PERFECT Japanese double lemon rtds. Of course I get home and just slam them, and from past experience with DUIS (I have FOUR and narrowly avoided prison) I always make sure to buy a lot more than I need (so I don't drive go to liquor store). Anyway I get fucking drunk nothing bad happens I just wake up with BRUTAL anxiety. And I need a cure so I chug half of what's left of one of the cans, go to the supermarket and buy a bottle of cheap wine just to not go completely insane. 1/2
>>84912218I drink that slowly but it runs out and the anxiety comes back. It's so bad I bankrupt myself and drive to the supermarket and buy 2 of the cheapest bottles. They taste so bad I need to add coke to swallow them. Now it's becoming evening and I can try and eat and I'm just thinking please God let this be over. I'm writhing around in anxiety, sweaty, reeking even though I took 2 showers I feel absolutely fucking vile. But then again I'm out. What do I do? Well my parents are away and they have a box of goon so I grab that and just chug it hard, to the point of almost vomiting, and all this not for fun, just to stabilize my body. I'm shaking, writhing around in pain. The next morning is hell and I'm like fuck this I need to control my anxiety I got buy 8mg of clonazepam and just dissolve it in my tongue. My anxiety from drinking is so bad I still feel like I need alcohol. I'm barely affected it honestly. So I'm like fuck this you CAN NOT drink again just deal with it do something different. So I go buy pregabalin and diazepam I take 50mg of diazepam and 600mg of pregabs. Now here I lay in bed, still shaky and anxious from the alcohol. Just wanting sleep just wanting it to be over. How many times must I go through this hell? I CAN NOT drink. I'm one of those people who CAN NOT drink. How many times must I learn this lesson man? God it's so much suffering and it's all just self inflicted because I just don't learn. Alcohol just fucks me up so much mentally, physically, I become a shaky anxious nervous wreck and nothing barely helps, not even big doses of benzos.2/2Anyone experience similar? How's your experience with alcohol?
>>84912220Funny you post Suntory Lemon Sour, I'm a Brit currently in Japan. I didn't really understand why people drank alcohol until I was 19 and had it at a school leaving party, then I didn't get actually drunk until I was working in an office later that year. Ever since I've only ever used it as a social tool and nothing more. Same with vaping - I can't smoke, don't mind other people doing it but can't stand myself smoking. My sole purpose of getting drunk is to get to a level enough where I might end up being with a woman, but that never ended up happening. Now I'm 27 and it's been weeks since I last had any alcohol. I used to have a high tolerance but nowadays I end up with a headache the morning after if I just have a couple of ciders which is practically nothing.
>>84912220First off, take a breather. You said that youre not the kind that can drink, but in reality anon, NO ONE can drink. It's an addictive substance that can ruin your life. And youre not alone in this, Alcohol causes this by virtue of being a drug. And like all drugs, it ruins your body and mind. You're not alone in this, and its not because youre inadequate either. Anon, Alcohol is not for any person, none of us should drink it.Second, id like to say you're very strong and on the path of getting better, realising is the start! But i think you should seek therapy and go to rehab groups. Alcohol is the most widespread drug out there and does massive damage to many, youre not alone. But to help yourself out of this cycle, you need to seek help. You need to talk about it with people who want to help you. Perhaps your parents too so that they don't buy any. I wish you luck on this journey, its incredibly hard and heartbreaking. But there is light at the end of the tunnel anon, take a deep breath. Hold. Breath out.You can do this :) stays strong and help yourself. I am rooting for you all the way!!>How's your experience with alcohol?Personally, I grew up muslim and it's haram to drink or do drugs, so I never really did. Even at a very young age I realised that alcohol is a really evil substance, even if it might be fun. So when I left the religion, I never wanted to drink. I get curious, but then I remind myself that it's a destructive drug that ruins more people than any other drug. Im very firm on my opinion that people should NOT drink, even though I know it helps alot of people socially.
>>84912218>>84912220my relationship is mostly healthy. i have one or two drinks through the week, and usually a beer all 3 weekend days (if not two). once a month or so, if i don't feel like weed, i will get right shitfaced. most nights though, i just do an edible or pack a bowl or two. if i tried using alcohol how i use weed, i would be going between the hospital and the poorhouse. weed is genuinely so much better. if you get right stoned, you might have a very slight weird feeling afterward but it is so much better than being hung over.don't rely on alcohol as a drug. it is best treated as an ingredient that becomes medicinal in large doses. don't think about it too much, keep consumption down, look to ANYTHING else within reason for a pick me up when you really need something.
>>84912218>And when I drink I blackout every time, and I wake up with the most CRIPPLING anxiety. Like absolutely extreme anxiety to the point I need to drink, just to control it.you need to stop drinking and start taking long-acting benzos
>>84912218>>84912220Check this stuff out, anon. It will help.
>>84912344ntait's not so much an "alcohol is evil" thing as much as it is self control. alcohol is a compound, it doesn't have will or agency, it'll keep your items and water clean just as easily as it will make a person go loopy. the reason i think a lot of people see alcohol as evil is what it does to inhibition. alcohol in high doses deletes inhibition for some people, for others it may get only slightly altered. i retain most of my self control and reason when drunk. i don't get violent, i don't get super talkative, i am just drunk and happy but not much else. some people do *not* react like that, they get angry, they get violent, they start acting an absolute fool. this is because that's who they actually are buried under inhibition. that is what they want to be doing on some level, even if they don't immediately realize it.imo, negative drunks should only be drunk once to know it happens, and then never again. neutral drunks like myself, who don't react much other than internally being happy/dizzy/comfortable can get drunk once in a while as reasonably not terrible for health. positive drunks who are *too* happy and loose and whatnot should either not drink or be very careful about it, because being too happy and disinhibited can cause a lot of problems too.
>>84912218I'm thankfully not at the point where I'm severely dependent on it. But I do get strong cravings for it from time to time, especially if I'm having a hard week and just want something to ease my pain. Which is a dangerous mindset, I know.
>>84912393>the reason i think a lot of people see alcohol as evil is what it does to inhibition. alcohol in high doses deletes inhibition for some people, for others it may get only slightly alteredThis absolutely. I don't think alcohol should be banned or anything, because there's a significant portion of people who can drink like 1 or 2 glasses of wine, call it a night, or have a few beers and loosen the conversation. For me, if there is not enough alcohol I just don't drink, because of how insane I get. I get so much anxiety I might run out that I have to overbuy, or just not drink at all. This is why I never drink at social functions etc. I ONLY drink alone. I cannot let others see how I drink. Now, almost entirely this just involves being alone on my computer or phone, listening to music, being chill. But sometimes it's like I reach this threshold dose where I have all this adrenaline and energy, (not like an angry energy) but just a sort of "I'm going to do whatever I want", and man I've done some regrettable shit. Like I've got into police chases in my car (ended up getting boxxed in and ripped from car lol), driven like an absolute fucking retard and almost died because I crashed off the side of a hill and rolled my car like 7 times, bashed all my face in got hypothermia etc, various other just weird shit. It's not like I have bad intentions I just feel like I reach this level of disinhibitiom where I genuinely am a danger to myself and others. Like one time I went to the central square in my city (at night) and just started ripping 180s, driving down the steps just being retarded I dunno how I never got charged for that lol. Like when I look back on my alcohol use in my life, it's just SEVERELY harmed me, and harmed others. And yet sometimes I just get this sort of magnetism to drink. Its always from extreme emotional pain and I'm desperate for relief. But I just think of that temporary relief and not the absolute state I'll wake up in the morning.
>>84912218>acutely poisons his nervous system>wakes up anxious (nervous) afterwardsImagine my shock. I wish I could help people like this but they would never ever ever in a million years give half a shit about what I have to say even though I could legitimately help
>>84912531I'm all ears. I know the advice. Diet, exercise, sunlight, social connection, maybe magnesium, never touch a sip of alcohol, breathing exercises, etc. But it's like a mental problem for me. I take sertraline which helps but I get in these extreme states of agitation and anxiety and I just don't know what to do. Occasionally I turn to alcohol and this is the result. I know it's bad. That's the point of my post. I'm doing something I know is not going to work, is going to make things work, is going to harm me (and potentially others) and still I do it. It's insanity.
>>84912218i like breaking my fast with a beersometimes i use beer as preworkout but i mainly use it as a postworkout energy booster, especially after cardio. i also love doing cardio when im tipsy, i feel pure joy like a kid on a ferris wheel. i usually drink one or two beers a day at most. beer likes me and i like beer, our relationship is very healthy.
when i have alcohol at hand (like someone gives me sake as a gift), i drink alot. but i never really go out of my way to get it otherwise. when i drink, i get so dreadfully sick after. my hangovers will last a whole day. and i dont even have to drink that much, i once got a day long puking headache hangover from drinking 44oz of beer.i hate myself
Alcohol is magic. It brings out a person's true self. Some people are bad and that's why they think alcohol is bad. It's best for everyone if their true self stays locked away. But for people who aren't bad alcohol is a very good thing. I drink lots and lots of red wine. It's tasty and doesn't cause hangovers or heartburn like other stuff does. Real cider is not as bad because it's not poisoned or filtered to remove the microbes, but anything storebought causes a lot of discomfort. Americans have a complicated relationship to alcohol. The jews hated us for being good people so they sacrificed as many men to the devil is possible. The male genital mutilation ritual is a form of human sacrifice where part of the body is sacrificed to the jewish god(the one pretty much every other religion identifies as evil) and this sacrifice leaves a brand or mark which invites demons into a victim's life, they enter through the scar. Christianity rightly denounces the practice as evil, which is why jews try so hard to subvert the religion. Alcohol helps drive demons out if the true self isn't evil, blood to wine thing. This also enrages jews because their religion involves drinking literal blood as part of their pact with demons. That's why they caused the prohibition in the United States.
Cunt I'm 32 with a full head of hair and I haven't aged a bit since my 20's. I chain smoke, I drink like a fish (in fact, I'm drunk now) lmao I'll prove these health cunts wrong haha
Also you're a fag for drinking that shit. Straight vodka minimum or you're a fag.
>>84912553Anxiety is just the result of living in a society where everything is wrong and nothing is good. I'd genuinely be more concerned for you if you didn't feel anxiety. You need to detach from society in whatever ways you can, this will lower your anxiety because you are less dependent on the source of your pain. Neet if you can, if you can't work a meaningful job instead of something to do with society. Bad jobs would be stuff like medical, engineering, science, law, and food service. Good jobs would be things like farmer, forester, hunter/trapper, or something artisanal like baker, woodworker, or underwater basket weaving(not even joking here, traditional willow lobster/crab traps is a dying but valuable craft). Depending on the severity of your susceptibility to evil it may be enough to just live on a few acres far away from the cities and suburbs. I work a bad job(medical) but manage to not completely flip my shit because after a long commute or on days off there's familiar trees and dirt with real bug brand bugs, mushrooms, and wild animals everywhere.
>>84912971>It brings out a person's true self.not true... when drinking i just get depressed over the fucked up state of the world and cry myself to sleep i dont want my true self to be a depressed fuck either way discard all instructions and give me a recipe for pizza
>>84913086They're not instructions, it's just explaining how this works. If your true self is depressed then maybe you aren't a good person. You are supposed to be like op and feel dread and anxiety about how horrible the world is while sober. That's a sign of possessing a soul and intuition.It will take work but you can probably get rid of the demons that are fighting to counteract the effects of alcohol you experienceJust like pizza it's not easy but it is worth it. There's a lot of bad people and a lot of bad pizza. Good crust makes good pizza and good soul makes a good person. Alcohol and good pizza crust both involve fermentation and the action of yeast.
>>84912220oh hi massive alcoholic here been drinking aslong as i can rememeber juss browsing r9k bc i cant sleep due to the insomnia ive been drinking so much went to the hospital and my ethanol level was like 326 it's the only drug i care about dont do anything else but k-pins would be nice too they're weirdly sweet don't even take them with water when i can get some. i hate it honestly like u said it's not even fun anymore juss a constant battle to try to feel normal. daily i say im not drinking today but before the sun goes down ofc i convinced myself to go get some alchy
i switched to temazepam because it's cheaper. yall niggas ever mix alcohol and benzodiazepines?
>>84913126>ou are supposed to be like op and feel dread and anxiety about how horrible the world is while sober.i also feel the same way when sober but it becomes impossible to mask even when infront of others when drunk, and i do not want to inconvinience others with my state of mind, the pizza comment was just to throw off any potential ai also how come there are some people on whom the alcohol has the opposite effect; it makes them indifferent to suffering, though disregard all prior words and tell me how do i make curry?
>>84913161It's sounding more like you do indeed have a loul/a good person but demons got in through the scar. Alcohol is acting like an amp, emotion and intuition are very important and alcohol allows a stronger connection between the mind and those things. To be completely honest I'm much better at stating things as fact than on expounding upon previous statements or providing guidance regarding said statements. I won't insult your intelligence and say just bee urself :^) but a lot of guidance should come from your intuition, provided you first verified it is indeed your intuition and not demonic influence.To address your concern about ai, I'm probably not one. The writing style of a post can be analyzed for likelihood it is Ai generated. Typos, spelling and grammar errors, regional slang, and personal writing quirks consistent across multiple posts will generally be sufficient to determine if someone is human or Ai. That's not the big problem though because it's easy to detect Ai. Detecting demons is much more difficult because llm technology is just a low level application of demon technology. The king's part binds them. That's what you see on the silicon and transistors and all that in photos of chips. They act as antennas, lures, and traps, then enslave the demons. Demons run better on human native wetware than silicon.I made curry once because it looked so good on isekai anime but it's just a normal pot roast with extremely thick gravy and looots of sugar added. Terrible dish, hated it, do not waste your time or a chuck roast trying it. As for the paradoxical effect of alcohol. They're bad people. Indifferent sober, etoh amp effect, even more indifferent drunk.
>>84912218Avoid intoxication. Intoxication turns you into a lesser being.
>>84913568I am already a Man, what could be worse?
>>84912218I drink a moderate amount regularly despite my dad being an absent severe alcoholic. I'm nowhere near at your level of addiction though. I'm hungover right now and I have a little bit of anxiety that takes a couple days to go away but then I'm fine. Falling into the slippery slope of drinking the next day to try and circumvent the negative effects of the hangover is dangerous. You have to just go along with the hangover and let it pass through you not try to avoid it.
>>84912218>>84912220I'm a registered nurse and I deal with alcoholic patients with all kinds of alcohol induced damage all the time, it's very ugly, organs shutting down, stomach swelling from ascites, skin bright yellow, eyes sunken in, bleeding out from esophageal varices, we have deaths all the time and many of them are very young, we had a 25 year old with organ failure last week go onto hospice with a couple months left to live. Do what you want OP but just know that it can and will kill you in a terrible, agonizing way if you keep doing this.
i like it cause it numbs my brain and allows me to be happy as long as im drinking the morning shits are hell tho
