What is having high-functioning autism really like?
>>85272288SZA, brie larson, meryl streep, kristen stewart
>>85272288I am diagnosed and was diagnosed 20 years ago. It's just really fucking tiring. I used to be considered intelligent (I got into university at 16) but years of crippling anxiety and depression have ruined my brain. I am always sleepy and can sleep for 12-24 hours easily, but I force myself to function out of habit and obligation. My brain gets super easy really quickly, I cannot (and do not have the desire to) maintain platonic friendships, though I have had a lot of temporary flings, hookups and fuck buddies. Loud noises and weird textures cause me physical pain that I force myself to push through and endure to function.Basically I am just a weird, socially inept freak. People think I am hilarious and a genius at first, then realise I am actually just pitiable and pathetic.
>>85272318maybe you should start eating raw meat
>>85272329I don't eat meat because I am a massive crybaby wuss who hates the idea of eating animals. Big emotional baby.
it's just an excuse to be a dick in that 'i'm such a nerd!' way.although society has cottoned on, so now they all say they're transgender.
>>85272334This is why you are weak. You do not eat raw meat, so your body has to cope with all the crap you eat day to day. It affects your mind. Mind-body connection.
>>85272288Like you are the only conscious person in a world full of bumbling NPCs
>>85272385Yeah, probably. It is what it is.
>>85272288>People here will try to convince you that there is something wrong if you find that girl attractive.
>>85272288People are socially allowed to call you autistic but won't diagnose you. People are socially allowed to bully you while acting more social.You get no benefits of any side.
>>85272288I can't speak for everyone, they say it's a spectrum afterall, but I'll say what it's like for me. First, I'll address the term "high functioning." I have no intellectual impairment, that's all that means. However, my various issues actually cause me to be rather unproductive compared to the average person. The big one is "sensory issues." There are all sorts of manifestations of this issue, ranging from mild to severe. All sorts of sensory experiences can cause completely irrational stress and panic responses, or even pain.>sound: Everything is always way too loud. Sounds from behind me are 10 times as bad. Moderately loud noises are enough to cause very real pain, even at a volume that should be causing no hearing damage. Life has gotten much easier with improvements in active noise cancellation technology. My coworkers called me weird for being able to hear what they are saying from the other side of the office. >texture: All sorts of clothing, especially synthetic fibres, feel like my skin is being ripped off. e.g. I rather be shirtless in public that wear a football jersey. Many foods are inedible because of their texture. Typically, it's meat. Like unrendered fat, connective tissue, sausage casing or any sort of inhomogeneity. I wash my hands unusually often because the littlest bit of oil on them drives me mad. >light: bright light, especially down-lighting is stressful>etc: too hot, too cold, clothes too tight or too loose, too sweaty...Another big one is social issues.>body language: from patterns of eye-contact and posture/stance alone, neutrotypicals can clock me within seconds of meeting. Not as autistic, most don't know, they'll just say "weird" instead. CONTINUED IN MY NEXT POST
>>85272776>bright lightl>too hot, too cold, clothes too tight or too loose, too sweaty...Isn't this annoying for everyone?
>>85272288>What is having high-functioning autism really like?It's like being retarded in real life, but when you are alone, you can function
>>85272776Social issues continued.>verbal communication: When people say things to me, I assume they mean what they say. (Not to imply trust, that's a separate issue.) When I say things to neurotypicals, they seem to assign what ever meaning they please to my words. The speech patten developed to cope with this is rather distinctive. Lots of qualifying statements. Not that it helps much.Repetitive behaviours are really obvious, but not exactly a major issue. >food: e.g. I somewhat randomly chose a Subway sandwich as a child and have ordered the same one every time thereafter. It does not help that I physically stand out, but the staff of every restaurant I frequent recognise me and know what I will order.>special interests: e.g. I have 2000hrs in Darktide. >stimming: e.g. I shake my legs, I rub the skin on my knuckles, squeeze my abdomen against my desk. These unremarkable behaviours can be weirdly soothing. >>85272809It's a matter of sensitivity / severity. For example, the lights in an office or classroom have been chosen in order to promote productivity for the average person. But I would prefer their brightness halved. It's the same pattern as what I said for sound, I just didn't repeat myself. A level of sound others think nothing of is causing me stress.
>>85272571I was wondering if that's basically what "high-functioning" means, your struggle is just not seen as legitimate.I keep being called an autist, but I think some people just enjoy putting labels on others, not that they're qualified to do so. I don't get any of the sensory overload stuff, but I have deep obsessive interests and I struggle with context switching. I find it easy to look at things from someone else's perspective, but I'm not usually swayed on an emotional level (I think most autists are the exact opposite).
>>85272288BasicallyEveryone hates you for no reason no matter what you do.You can't really relate to them anyway because they all seem to just enjoy repetition and you enjoy novelty and depth.You are simultaneously the best, most efficient worker in any given workplace but also the most expandable because people care more about charisma than competence, and again, people hate you for no real reason.People go out of their way to sabotage you when you've never even interacted with them, for no real reason.People get mad at you for turning up to work and doing your job well because they think you're after their job or trying to make them look bad or some shit, because it's all about them and why would you take pride in your work?People think you're unfriendly because you don't repeat the pointless social ritual in their direction every time you see them.Or if you try to do the pointless social ritual like they want they get mad you do it too often.People get mad you don't look them in the eyes.People get mad about you 'staring them down' and making 'aggressive eye contact'.Basically people just get mad no matter what you do, even when you do what they got mad about you not doing last time, so you kind of just write them all off as utterly braindead wastes of time and energy who only want something to complain about.Things take you more energy to do, because you do them properly and thoroughly.People don't communicate what they want properly then get mad with you because they got what they asked for, not what they wanted.You get seen as a savant because you have interests and speak with a vocabulary higher than that of a third-grader.You also get seen as a child by anyone you're foolish enough to let know about your disability.
>>85273580>they all seem to just enjoy repetition and you enjoy novelty and depthwhat do you mean?
>>85272288Autism isn't real, tismoids just pretend because they like the attention it gets them
>>85272288>What is having high-functioning autism really like?it sucks
>>85273754Ain't readin all that gang
>>85272288Built, made, put together, prepared, invented, engineered, crafted, created, constructed, developed, concocted, arranged, molded, designed, refined, processed, formed, formulated, established, organized, grown, produced, framed, erected, forged, assembled, inaugurated, fabricated, confected, handcrafted, divinely sculpted, specifically commissioned, born and raised, geographically programmed, shaped, organically manufactured, actualized, synthesized, meticulously tailored, artisanally curated, precision-cut, intricately woven, algorithmically generated, cosmically aligned, preordained, conjured, manifested, structurally reinforced, biologically optimized, finely tuned, lovingly cultivated, systematically deployed, expertly modeled, painstakingly prototyped, historically destined, magically induced, conceptually realized, bespoke, custom-fitted, genetically modified, chemically bonded, intellectually spawned, spiritually awakened, architecturally plotted, thoroughly vetted, intentionally purposed, immaculately conceived, carefully distilled, mechanically extruded, genetically sequenced, painstakingly polished, and universally ordained solely for asian cock.
>>85273580Every sentence was here was relatable. There's some sensory stuff too, that I've only recently noticed is out of the norm. I would still deny myself having autism in any meaningful sense. People just act way too rigid about aesthetic social rules and are somehow simultaneously completely oblivious to the unjust ways they behave towards others. They will subconsciously calculate the amount of times someone has completed some act of social masturbation, and compare so that everyone in the group is participating in it. There are all these paradoxical assumptions about what they should do only because they expect everyone else wants them to do it, and the only reason someone wants them to do it, is because they are expected to do it too.
>>85272288>Worked in an office with majority women and they nicknamed me pic relatedI was not a misogynist before working here. Now I would brutalize all these women if there were no consequences.
I saw the Spider Man movie yesterday with a girl who told me she thought I had "a touch of the 'tism". I was only formally diagnosed by one doctor but at least half of a dozen others I went to in my childhood years thought I was just gifted. Nowadays it's not hard to make friends for me (it's gotten a lot better particularly in the past few years), but with girls it's a totally different story. Either they treat me like I'm their child or they're totally avoidant. Dating is basically pic related.
>>85273914Lol fuckass weirdo got bullied by girls. I bet they were fun you're just a freak
I'm starting to think I'm high functioning or similar. People clock me as "weird" no matter how much I try to just be normal. I can balance it out by being "funny" but as soon as I get too comfortable with people I also get too intense for them.Everyone is wrong, or doing something wrong, and I want to help them if they're still young but I know I only look like an asshole when I start telling them how they shouldn't leave their computer on 24/7.>idk he's just like that>you're having a manic episodeI have a lot of interests but none of them are particularly "manly" so Ive been called a manchild behind my back despite paying all my bills and moving out at 21. No one really gets me.It also feels like a lot of my emotions are on mute, so I can't know how I'm feeling until I catch myself doing something in the moment.
>>85273935>I bet they were fun you're just a freakWomen are never fun you fucking simp.
>>85272318>Loud noises and weird textures cause me physical pain that I force myself to push through and endure to function.I hear that, bud.
>>85273945You must not interact with women much, most of them are very fun to be around ;P
>>85272459I do not know who that is
>>85273955I literally want to beat the shit out of every woman I meet even if they are nice to me.
>>85272288I think it is better to keep the term Aspergers. Just so everyone autist and normalfag alike can be reminded that we really did euthanize undesirables because they made the normalfaggots feel icky. The world is not full of sunshine and rainbows and we should not let normalfaggots sweep the past under the rug.
>>85273627I'm not sure what needs further explanation.Normies like small talk: repetitive social rituals where they recite the same scripts about the weather.I like in-depth discussion of anything.Normies like the same movies with the same actors and the same tropes and the same characters and they get confused when anything is different.I want movies made by people I've never heard of that aren't like anything I've ever seen before, that expose me to new ideas or ways of thinking.Normies just want to do and say the same things over and over and over and over and over again and it's utterly mind numbing.>>85273860>There's some sensory stuff tooThe main issues I have there is an inability to hear people speaking over background noise. If I'm already extremely stressed then certain things might make me snap or shout more easily than they should but overall sensory stuff isn't a huge issue in my life.>People just act way too rigid about aesthetic social rules and are somehow simultaneously completely oblivious to the unjust ways they behave towards others. They will subconsciously calculate the amount of times someone has completed some act of social masturbation, and compare so that everyone in the group is participating in it. There are all these paradoxical assumptions about what they should do only because they expect everyone else wants them to do it, and the only reason someone wants them to do it, is because they are expected to do it too.Accurate. I feel the best way to summarize it is they have an obsession with playing follow the leader, yet they're all too scared to actually stand out or be individuals in any capacity, so their 'leaders' tend to be followers just as much as the rest of them are, just in a different way. It's an ouroborous of people copying other people, eating each other's tails because that's what everyone else does. If time travel were involved we'd call it a bootstrap paradox, but it isn't, so we just call it 'normal'.
>>85273991>we should not let normalfaggots sweep the past under the rug.>Trying to get normies to pretend the world isn't perfect.You're fighting a losing battle there anon. Consider invading a small country with a butter knife instead, you may have better odds.>>85273920>Either they treat me like I'm their child or they're totally avoidant.Yep, thank the lord for girls with caretaker issues.When I was younger I got by just by having drugs on me and saying less, letting girls project whatever they wanted or assumed on me. But junkie women don't age well and neither does a life spent high. Dating went from normal to nightmare mode the moment I hit 30.>>85273938>I can balance it out by being "funny"'Cultured' works well as well if you're surrounded by hicks. Normies literally don't know the difference between IQ and quoting people and they'll tend to attribute your weirdness to being 'intellectual' or whatever they think you are. Get a pair of glasses for that one. 95% of what normies think about you is literally based on what you wear. It's retarded but I don't make the rules, I just exploit them.
Being autistic with ADD and an average intelligents is basically a living hell and I honestly question why I should live everyday or if this is some punishment from the heavens.I can't follow small talk or even normal conversations. It literally is noise in my head or I forget what they are saying mid sentence cause a bunch of other noise around the conversation is trying to take my focus away like birds chiping, cars, other conversations or just the fucking wind.Only direct tasks makes sense in my head but if I'm alone with someone is a quite space I can go on about deeper discussion on things that interest me but normies don't give a fuck.My speech is also severly impaired from all the voices and thoughts in my head. I'm trying to form a sentence but for some reason I forget the words mid talk and I stand around saying "uuuummmmh what was the word again" while everyone looks at me like I'm a fucking retard. My speech is like a 4 year old but in my head everything makes sense and I can form words and phrases but as soon as I have to look someone in the eyes and open my mouth my brain goes heywire from the overstimulation and stress.
>>85274044Note that glasses wont work if you are a legit dumbass.
>>85272817haha thats perfect. smart in all the ways that dont matter
>>85273974Woahh chuddy you're so tuff
>>85273991My only complaint is that we haven't buried every single sperg out there yet
>>85274072Honestly you'd be surprised.Never underestimate the normie's ability to draw unfounded conclusions from utterly superficial details. It's kind of just what they're like.I've seen a group of them act like someone was 'tough' based on nothing but the fact he had tattoos and talked himself up nonstop. Predictably, if someone feels the need to tell you how tough they are all the time... well, it's like how people who complain about CP on social media a lot keep turning out to have terabytes of CP, you know? The second real shit happens, Mr Ink is nowhere to be seen.
>>85274131Im not. I just know a womans place is beneath me.
>>85272776Yep. For me, the biggest thing is the sensory stuff. I don't find that i'm as fussy, but when exposed to just daily sensory things I get very agitated and stressed out. Even if i'm only subconsciously aware of the things that are annoying me, it is still grinding away at my sanity. I can cope with it well for a few hours, but it just builds up and up and I shut downI remember sitting in the living room with my parents and I was getting really agitated and stressed for seemingly no reason. I became aware of this fact and asked myself why. I realised it was the glare of a lamp in my peripheral vision. It is little things like that. Just normal everyday things, especially out in publicI have to manage myself carefully and get a lot of alone time. I am unable to work because of this. I couldn't go to school because of this. When I was 12, I became so stressed, it was indescribable. I was in such an awful state, it wasn't anyway to live or to be. So they pulled me out of school. I spent most of my teens basically in solitude at home. It ruined my life
>>85274964Being alone at home might have stunted you but how would things have turned out if they just let you stay outside and disregarded your mental being?
>>85275068I live in the Irish countryside. So that was ok sensory wise. But if I had kept going to school, I wouldn't even had been functional. I can't describe the state I was in, but I developed a lot of mental disorders from the long term stress. It was just hell. I wasn't fit to even learn anything in that state. And I would had gotten worse and worse. I'd probably not be here today if I kept going to school. When I was 17, I was recovered enough to start getting out. I overcame the social anxiety that I had developed from being a shut-in for 5 years. I occasionally went out and did things. And I started lifting and training in to box, and got very fit. I was getting out more. I was able to come off the meds they had me on because I was of age to make that decision. The meds were not helping, especially the ones I was on in my early teens (those ones had side effects like agitation, and they turned me into a zombie)Then I realised my limits at age 20. I couldn't accept them, got depressed and became a shut-in for most of my 20's. Lol. Not like I would had been able to do much with my lfe anyways. I'm 30 now and happy for the most part. I'm over it all now. Don't give a fuck anymore. I just grow spuds and herbs and shit and play vidya. That's my life. My world is small. And that's all it will ever be. But I'm just glad i'm over the suffering and depression
>>85272288She looks good in op's pic, but she is overrated based on her other pics.
>>85272329>>85272385>Hurr durr eat raw meatEating raw or even undercooked meat can give you food poisoning, which causes diarrhea and vomiting and can even kill you. Don't listen to this retard.
>>85273580>People get mad at you for turning up to work and doing your job well because they think you're after their job or trying to make them look bad or some shit, because it's all about them and why would you take pride in your work?This entire post was so relatable, but does that mean I have "high functioning autism"? Is "high functioning autism" even a thing, or is it just a symptom of having above average intelligence in a world full of morons?
I have very high intelligence but my autistic limits are like basball bat hits in my head and my stomach. I feel so bad about my limits. And Im also psychologically impaired because I grew up in an abusive home. Yet somehow I managed to channel my autism occasionally to write 2 books that actually are worth something at least. I could get a publisher or some shit but I feel like I would fuck myself over because what I wrote is exceedingly radical but in my view it makes sense. Im essentially debunking the legitimacy of nation states because they are not based on consent among other things. I also have some radically honest passages in it and its pretty embarassing too. On the other hand I should just embrace my freedom but Im a shy autist retard genius. I dont know where to go from here. I heard that the fruit falls off the tree once it is ripe, but will I ever be ripe? I actually want a family and a house and freedom without being evil, I vould not be evil, but this world is majorly fucked currently. It is like I need legit magic to make it but most likely I will just fall flat because of malice, corruption and my own inability. If Im honest I probably want real love among the highest of priorities because my family hates me and I want a girlfriend, a wife even.
>>85272288Don't know If I'm autistic, but probably since I relate to both the inner experiences described here and there, as well as the reaction from other people, who describe me as "weird", who become angry against my most serene neutrality and desire to exchange information, anyway. Currently a waiting list for a psychiatrist to see what they'll say; started this process since I can't find a job and I think I'll never pass HR/Women coworker filter, I hate their ways, I hate the lies, the fake smiles, the judging without talking, etc.If I could describe my experience, it's a sort of mono-fixated hyper-attention, it's why I listen well but cannot think while listening and therefore am slow to answer, it's why I can think well but only if I don't have to listen to anything but my thoughts, it's why conversation + music is sort of dazzling, debilitating, it's why learning to drive a car was dangerous, because staring at things for too long was usual for me and often made me lose track of the road, It's why I'm slow to understand jokes, because I assume I get caught and delayed in processings, also, a sort of giant non-caring about what people I don't care for think. I hate strongly, I love strongly, I like staring at beautiful faces, I like staring at trees, I like staring into the void, I guess it's an intense life that I seek. But I hate all sorts of losing control on myself, I hate regular drug taking, I cry when I get sick and can't stand specifically because I feel so weak. Again, I don't know if I'm autisic>>85275725>Im essentially debunking the legitimacy of nation statesGood. I think autists tend towards anarchist/aristocratic ideals because their happiness relies tremendously more than normies on independence and isolation. I think happiness for every human consists in feeling self-reliant, creative, independent and powerful, but maybe autists feel it more dearly, because they are so rejected by feminine modernity.
>>85272288To me it's just exhausting. To put it as simply as possible, I'm normal enough on the surface to maybe have a passing conversation with strangers. I've sort of "memorized the social script" in a sense just by listening to other people talk.But when it comes to coworkers or acquaintances, if I don't mentally click with them (as a lot of people with autism and adhd/add seem to do with ewach other) then they can sense that something is "off." So you need to put on a social mask to get through the day.Pretty much what >>85273754 posted. At least for meIt's so fucking tiring if you're not around the right people
I find it very tiring and difficult to function properly. I've done things past my comfort zone and it never gets easier, got my license, had gfs, done stem msc but its so hard. I'm currently staying in a low stakes government job where I get away with not working or going in because I'm so tired of adult life and trying to function. Basic tasks really tire me out and some days I hate all sensations, I dont bother trying to pretend to be normal anymore either, too much effort, I dont have friends because I couldn't maintain the relationships but I do have a gf but I am at the point where I put in the most minimal effort, but shes very low maintenance anyway and I'm not sure how much id actually care if she left me. Pros are that I can happily exist on my own and know some things, but where it actually matters I struggle. If it was curable I would pursue this.
>>85275821You make a whole lot of sense to me. Did you know that autist to autist communication is enhanced, on average on the same level as normie to normie conversation? If you feel more at home, more meaning in the text in here, then because you are autistic. My theory is that due to different neuronal wiring the inherent frequencies of thinking are different and therefore the resonance frequencies are also less normie. Resonating means understanding. The understanding gap also applies between IQ differences but I sense that you are also high or very high IQ.This way information can more easily flow from one mind to another due to similar nativity.<3You rock. We are meant for (our own quirky) greatness
>>85272329>>85272385enjoy your worms
>>85272288unrelated to the question but i really need to lick her feet, armpits, and butthole. i'm prob her type too, sucks how distance prevents this
>>85276690I just want a girl to love and hug. Someone who will say to me that she loves me, she's proud of me, and everything will be OK. I don't care about sex anymore. I feel like such a loser but I have never had this in my life and it's killing me inside. One day my parents will be gone and if I don't have anybody I will probably kill myself. The biological urge to want a woman is absolutely horrible and will be the downfall of me. My grandfather killed himself because of this, so it's probably genetic.
>>85276861get a creative hobby or something; anything that helps you find value in yourself rather than relying on other people to tell you that you're good for anything
>>85276861Love from a woman? lel
>>85274067I relate to all of this but i cant tell if i have both autism and adhd or just adhd. Apparently i was never diagnosed with anything as a child but im not so sure about that.
>>85276690>i'm prob her typePoor innocent Timmy in for a rude awakening.
>>85273996You're not autistic, you're just an introverted intellectual.
>>85276861>she's proud of meYou still need to do the work to make that part happen, so just get to it. You'll gain more motivation from it along the way, from yourself, but maybe even from other people.>The biological urge to want a woman is absolutely horrible and will be the downfall of me. My grandfather killed himself because of thisPresumably he at least managed to pass his genes on, so...?
>>85272288Stop posting this nasty-ass rice cooker
>>85277966I assure you I am. I have a lot of issues with burnout I didn't mention, I have trouble with interoception, and chronic miscommunications and social misunderstandings ruin every aspect of my life for me. I'm also faceblind, I literally tell people apart by their hair, dress sense, and mannerisms, if they were all shaved and naked I wouldn't recognize them. I have had a lot of instances where people I knew for years approached me with a new haircut and I had no idea who the fuck this stranger was who was coming up to me. I have zero awareness of tone of voice or expressions or body language, to me ALL communication is verbal and anything that isn't doesn't exist. I have no instinctual understanding of social hierarchy - I've slowly come to understand it in theory as an adult, but I still see no reason why I would treat my boss differently than any other coworker, nor why I would treat someone wearing rags any differently to someone wearing a suit. To me everyone is just equal and that's the only way my mind works, the idea of anyone being 'better' than someone else provokes instant hostility from me, because growing up NT's always told me everyone was equal, and why the fuck would they lie? The thing I heard most during punch-ups and fights at school was 'You think you're better than me?' and I still to this day struggle to understand why those people felt that way, because clearly it was them who felt I was better than them, not the other way around, and surely given that I'm supposed to be the one with 'theory of mind issues', they must have understood this better than I did. I also have a pretty clear PDA profile going back to my childhood, I have zero tolerance for any 'authority' trying to demand things of me. As a kid I would shout profanity at strongly-worded ads on the tv (buy now, buy now, that kind of thing) and got in trouble for flatly refusing to ever sing the national anthem at school.
>>85278024>Presumably he at least managed to pass his genes on, so...?He was a sperm donor. I or my parents never met him
>>85272288A bunch of things that you might deem normal and trivial in social situations are the most important for neurotypicals, expect to get scolded for harmless or even benign actions because they "makes you/us/them look like x" etc. You speak and comprehend most things literally, if you see someone you weren't expecting at your house and then proceed to say "wow I wasn't expecting you here" it may be taken as an insult or rude thing to say despite the fact it's obvious and trueIf you make this condition known to anyone, expect them to treat you like a dumbass who can't do anythingThen there's sensory issues. I lived with hearing sensitivity my whole life, your brain doesn't really block any noise, people may think you're weird for hearing stuff from "far away". Big and really loud noises hit like twice as hardNo one understands what you say, people will just interpret something that may not even be implied by what you said and you are not held accountable for their interpretation of your words.There are only 2 ways to make friends, find similar people or change how you act completely and create a persona to appeal to neurotypicals, otherwise forget itWhile you were medically diagnosed and get treated like garbage for being born in a certain way, normies on the internet will take your condition and twist it into something to appeal to them, your disorder is now a trend, because having hyperfixations is quirky You might be physically repulsed by a specific texture, chewing a specific food, etc, sometimes textures simply don't feel right on your skin
>>85279659>If you make this condition known to anyone, expect them to treat you like a dumbass who can't do anythingIt's strange how true this is even if they see you as a savant before they know.>Know person for a couple months.>They consistently imply you're 'the smart one', ask for your advice about things, get you to look over things for them.>Tell them you're autistic.>They start speaking slower and using small words suddenly.Neurotypicals see the world in such a strange, black-and-white way, it's like they can't comprehend two seemingly unrelated things being true at the same time, like their minds can't handle any kind of nuance.They will literally ignore months of interaction with you and everything they already know about you because they learn you have a disability and it's like... do you people even think?A lot of the time they feel more like robots than people. They don't consider long-term consequences. They don't consider circumstances. They don't consider what factors might be affecting something. It's like they are only capable of comprehending what's right in front of them, right now, and their own unfounded, vague-ass feelings. As if they lack object permanence. They assume everything they see is a perfectly typical representation of that thing. They will see someone succeed at something once and decide that must be a successful person, even if that person's track record is 99 failures 1 success, as long as the person smiles. It's insane. Like dealing with children incapable of critical thought. But the children run the fucking preschool.
>>85275126how do you make money? Neetbux? Family? Living alone gardening in the countryside and playing games is my dream life desu
>>85272288Constant neurological warfare, a lifetime of ridicule and being unable to cope and then addiction to check out from it
>>85279862Yeah, NEETbux and Autismbux, and my parents bring me into town for errands. I don't drive because I have a funny thing about pictures. I don't like them. So I don't want a driver's licence or bank account (requires pictures). It feels like a violation to meI'm going to have to figure out how to survive on my own for when my parents are not able. Maybe I will have to sell this house and buy one by the local lough with some land so I can small time farm and use a boat to get around instead. The lough has access to several towns and spans my entire county and is linked to a larger waterway. That's one plan. It's either that or get a couple of donkeys for transport but they would cost far too much to keep. They'd give good manure though
>>85280110> I don't drive because I have a funny thing about picturesDamn that's some high-level autism. I get what you mean tho, I hate photos too. I would recommend biting the bullet and getting a license if you can force yourself to suppress that part of your tism. It will extend your runway and give you far more options in the long run, especially since you live somewhere rural. Mad jelly of your setup, sounds like you're an industrious autist and not one of those apathetic ones content to sit around all day watching anime or something. I bet you're capable of more than you think. I know it's gay and trite to say but 30 really isn't too late bro.
>>85280110>bank account (requires pictures)since fucking when?
>>85280396In Ireland north and south it does>>85280379I've thought about it many times but can't bring myself to do it. I just find it creepy having my image frozen in time for ever. And I don't like how people can manipulate it, or get fed into AI databases and use my face to create artificial abominations. And I don't like getting treated like cattle by national governments. Can't do it>Mad jelly of your setupI'm grateful for it. If I didn't have this and lived in some housing estate in the town I would had become what you described. I know a lot of things. My father has taught me a lot. We clear up fallen trees for the local farmer who owns the land around us, we haul them back to the yard and cut and spilt it for firewood. It saves a lot of money. I can fish, forage and do agriculture and horticulture. I've grown a lot of herbs and flowers and try to sell them to people I know. But marketing isn't my thingIt's far off for what I need it to be in the future, but i'm very glad for it. It's an acre. Enough to grow a good plot of potatoes and other vegetables and do some composting. I dug a ridge of potatoes up yesterday. 10 out of 46 plants got me 18kg. I've 21 years of experience growing potatoes
>>85280379>>85280465If you have even a small garden you can get into it. Especially if you have a lawn. Square a bit off, do a method called "lazy bedding" and put some potatoes in. Or you can grow them in containers. You can grow anything in containers
>>85280110What about surveillance cameras? I would avoid leaving my house for the same reason for a while
>>85280579I refuse to go into shops with facial recognition. I go to the selfcheckout and stand to the side of the camera. But you can't avoid them all. There are cameras up high. I wear a hoodie and put the hood up. It helps soothe my sensory problems a bit too. People probably think i'm a lunatic wearing a hood up all the time, or a retard, but sure I sort of am. I dont care
>>85280609That's a good idea. Now it's somewhat okay to wear masks too so you can just go with a hoodie and a mask. This was for me back in 2015-2016, and I was vehemently against wearing anything I deemed too casual, so no hoodies. I didn't want to be singled out at school either so I just mostly suffered through it. I didn't really go to other places until I learned where the cameras were. Even to this day if I see a new camera installed somewhere where it wasn't previously I avoid the area unless absolutely necessary.Sorry for the long ass rant but it's interesting to hear from other people who have had similar experiences as I did years ago.
>>85272288its like watching other people play life on easy mode and talk to each other like they are just pressing dialogue options, and being told you are evil for not "getting it." also if you work hard to get something, and actually manage to get an achievement, everyone will turn on you and try to tear you down for seemingly no reason, while they themselves have nothing of note in their lives beyond being naturally socially intuitive.
>>85280682Nah I appreciate it. I like reading your post. I didn't know anyone else cared about cameras, I thought I was just a nut
>>85273754>>85273580This and this.>>85273991Also this, normalfags are psychopathic murderers and it's long past time that somebody held them to account.
