I broke my mind by having OCD over ecelebs, musicians and politics. Or just anything that catches my stupid obsessive mind. I feel like a piece of shit that's going to hell. I don't like myself. I don't like this. I don't like what I've been doing. I wish that neuralyzer thing in Men in Black was real so I could use it on myself.Now I'll just live in shame forever. I fucking hate myself.I don't want validation. I just wanted and felt obligated to say this. I owe you all this. I'm sorry and I hate myself. If that even means anything to anyone. I genuinely do hate myself though. I want to log off. I need to. But I'm too weak. I'm too morbidly curious. But I don't want to be.I hate myself.
>>85719577Sending a squad to wipe your memory right now, are you sure about this?
>>85719580Yes! Wipe it all out of my brain. I beg you.I want to feel like a dignified person. Not thinking about all this crap and running my mouth.
I just miss the carefree days when I laid outside on a field with her and watched the sky. Nobody knew about us. It has stayed between us two ever since.But do I ever miss her. Do I ever miss not being a chronically online unemployed loser with psoriasis and insomnia. I miss just feeling good about myself period. I miss being quirky with quirky people. Before everyone got so neurotic.I just wanted to be understood. Now at this point I've pissed off everyone from all directions. Fuck. I'm just rambling. I need to shut up. I just wish we all were better people and had better people around us. I wish we all understood each other better. I just miss the smile most. That kind of wicked but warm smile. And the eyes. Same general gis as with the smile. Now it's just snarls and scowls and occasionally fake, contrived smiles everywhere I go.I hate this mouse utopia. I want out.
>>85719580Hey make sure to implant something about getting a hobby and finding a third space where they can build connections that last.>>85719674Yeah man idk, some people have said things go in spirals so you may just be in a dark space but the light may be right around the corner. Try volunteering? Maybe you can make some new friends or show people that you've changed for the better.
