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i hate my life. i go to a shit job where i make a few bucks above minimum wage. my family resents me. i have no parents left, 20 btw. been using alcohol weed and opiates daily since i was 16. i like getting fucked up, getting fucked up and my cat and music is all i have left at this point. no friends either. the problem is that when you use multiple things youre never fucked up enough. tonight ive had 8 standard drinks and a half a gram of wax but since im missing the hydrocodone i feel unsatisfied. the more and more you use the more it takes to feel that same bliss that got you hooked in the first place. it started off with alcohol, and then i needed weed to get the same total goneness i liked about alcohol, and now here i am adding pain pills into the mix. i just wanna die atp but i guess ill survive, i dont really wanna die i just want some change in my life