>>98126538
Out of curiosity, what class was she playing?
Regardless, its only been a couple sessions, it'll get better when she gets more comfortable. If this continues for a long time after, then feel free to call her a retard.

Have you tried not playing DND?

I don't believe this story at all.

>>98126596
thiefling bard

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>>98126538
I had both really amazing and really shitty female players in my almost 15 years of GMing, but I have a regular who's a bit of a similar and curious case
>female friend
>not really bright, to be honest she's borderline retarded and that's the opinion of pretty much all our mutual friends
>struggles with any sort of abstract scenario, struggles with reading longer words or sentences in her native language, struggles to comprehend any plot, problem or situation that's not extremely basic
>good friend though
>sadly she keeps gaslighting herself that she's actually a highly educated and cultured person (we had to carry her through like 75% of her uni assignments)
>always wants to play as a wizard, scientist or some other similar character concept (depending on the system)
>can't roleplay intelligent or capable characters at all
>can never remember or sometimes even comprehend her class mechanics
>barely uses her spells or special abilities, usually doesn't even remember them
>when she does, it's usually in an utterly retarded way
>her builds make no damn sense despite our tips and explanations, because she can't stomach her character being "bad" in anything, so she's always trying to make a borderline useless alrounder
>also has terrible issues keeping attention of what's going on during the sessions
>we start gently nudging her towards simpler characters
>she's salty at first and when she does play them, she keeps roleplaying them as if they were some cavemen
>slowly though she's beginning to enjoy them
>slowly but surely she accepts that these kinds of characters are better for her and now she plays them almost exclusively
>the experience of playing with her massively improved

>>98126608
>t. retarded nogames spammer.

>>98126619
>thiefling
First of all, as a Tiefling enjoyer, fuck you
Second, Bard isn't too complicated, so she'll probably adjust after a few more sessions.

>>98126649

Interesting cope right here

>>98126680
If you used your brain and not your ass for once you would understand that changing game is not going to make a bad player a good one.

>>98126596
Duskblade
>Regardless, its only been a couple sessions, it'll get better when she gets more comfortable.
But she only shows up once maybe twice a year. This has gone on for several years now. And I don't mind an occasional visiting player like that. But it's annoying when these people cannot comprehend that not everyone is a tabletop autist and that's why simple stuff like a fighter exists.

>>98126608
>Have you tried not playing DND?
Yep.
I've played
Savage Worlds
Traveller
GURPS
Call of Cthulhu
Stars Without Number
Worlds Without Number
Warrior Rogue Mage
Apocalypse World
13th Age
And guess what?
I still like playing D&D sometimes.
Now answer my question or else shove it up your fucking ass faggot.

>>98126538
>take totally ignorant player
>give her a "build" like a reddit autist retard
>act surprised when she doesn't instantly play like a hyper optimized veteran who understands the rules inside and out
Consider choking on your dice, OP. You're beyond saving in every regard.

>>98126708

It totally does. OP's example is about someone being tactically-challenged, so to speak. Tactical in the DND sense, anyway.
Ditching altogether the tactical aspect is a good idea for such cases, I would go for something like Monsterhearts or Paranoia.

>>98126780

And how did she go in those? Assuming you are OP.

>>98126823
You are not playing D&D (or really anything else) and you are still a retarded faggot.

>>98126823
>And how did she go in those?
No better than in D&D because all RPG systems have some level of complexity to them. I think Warrior Rogue Mage is the only one that is truly dead-simple and you can fully comprehend in a single sitting.

Oh and maybe B/X D&D, since there are basically no player-facing rules.

>>98126811
I'm not mad at her, I'm mad at my friends for not realizing this incredibly stupid fact, and leaving me to be the bad guy and call a new player stupid, when that's not what I'm saying, she simply doesn't have the time to learn all these rules for a game she plays twice a year.

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>>98126538
>girl player
This was your first mistake. Doomed from the start.

>>98126909

Sure thing man.

>>98126965

The issue here is not complexity. That being said, there are DEFINITELY games simpler than B/X, I hope this is not your benchmark.

>>98126971
>t. brain dead nogames.

>>98126969
>leaving me to be the bad guy and call a new player stupid
You're the bad guy because you know exactly why the situation is the way it is, but you insist on blaming the new player instead of your retarded faggot friends.

>>98126969
If you only have to put up with this twice a year, then what's the issue? Is it that they're ruining the fun for her?

>>98127086
>Is it that they're ruining the fun for her?
Yes. And for me , as well, by making her play some overly-retarded build that she doesn't even get to enjoy the fun of because she has no idea how to play it and they basically just turn her into a minion of theirs.

>>98127011
Where did I blame her for this problem at all? The problem is idiots who offer an overly-complicated build to someone who has no idea what they are doing.

>>98126975
>The issue here is not complexity.
what's the issue, then, retard?

>>98127147
Called her stupid and complained online that she's slowing down your shitty D&D game. Did you think you were being kind?

>>98127173

As I said

>being tactically-challenged, so to speak

She sounds like she would not do good on easier tactical RPGs than DnD.

>>98127173
I didn't say she was stupid.
I said I don't want to look like I am calling her stupid for.
There's a difference you fucking ESL retard.

>>98127375
You centered the story on the girl, because you're a disingenuous retard, instead of centering it on your faggoty powergamer friends who are the real problem. The fact that you're even talking about "builds" and framing certain classes as hard to play tells me you are beyond saving.

>>98126538
>says she wants to play
>refuses to learn how to play
No she doesn't. She want's attention and validation.
If she wanted to play the game she would learn to play the game on her own time. She doesn't give a shit about the game.

>>98127416
White knight harder, faggot.

>>98126538
News at 11
Women aren't suited to rpgs
Also, water is wet

>>98127796

In my experience like half of the good players have been women.

>>98126977
He's right thoughever. Any table that allows women or faggots is doomed to failure from the start.

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I had two girls playing VTM on a discord server mic game. it started with a mix of dudes and chicks but I banned the dudes because they became insufferable. Girls are great at roleplaying and in the end it become a GF experience simulator. It's funny, men want violent power fantasy and girls just wanna play Romeo and Juliet

>>98127791
Thanks for proving my point.

>>98127791
Tard somewhere else.
>>98127796
Nogames like you being stupid is not news, faggot
>>98127817
Yeah, you are too retarded to play tabletop games, nogames.

>>98127143
Seems like it's your job to get her into a game using a better system, then. Even if it's just for a one-shot.

>>98126538
Just be honest, she'll understand and appreciate it.

>>98126639
i've known the mentally disabled and i've known dumb people but i've never met an otherwise normal person with an intelligence as low as you're describing. what's that like?

>>98126538
this is why the Barbarian and the Fighter Exists. you can use these classses easily for temporary/new players and they dont need to bother knowing wtf it is they should do. hit the monster with big bonk, easy.

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>>98127848

>>98128937
Pretty bizarre honestly
We've known her for around 7 years now and it has been an endless streak of surprises at how dense or clueless she can be.

She is mostly normal and capable when it comes to basic daily functioning. You know, house chores, taking care of herself, holding conversations on simple everyday topics, does plenty of artsy stuff etc., she's not like retarded-retarded.
But she is visibly struggling with anything requiring some focused thinking, usually does a fucktonne of mistakes when writing and has like 0 understanding of the world - her knowledge about topics like History or Geography is basically non-existent (some highlights: she was 100% certain that movies were still black&white in 90s; she was also certain that Hawaii islands are in Europe because she confused them with Netherlands, which also starts with an "H" in our language; stuff like that comes up all the time with her), her understanding of politics or society is mostly based on clickbaits and heavily simplified understanding of random info she caught somewhere.
Oh, also she has terrible impulse/emotion control

Worst of all, her defence mechanisms are constantly on overdrive. She has this image of herself as a highly educated person because she managed to, with huge help, finish uni, and is constantly huffing copium to not accept that she actually isn't very bright.
She is carried hard by her boyfriend who honestly often has to act like a half-time caregiver for her and constantly explain things to her (which often pisses her off). He also does his best to keep up her delusion that she is in fact intelligent so that she feels better.


To be quite honest, she comes from a terribly pathological family, her mother is an alcoholic who was most likely drinking during pregnancy and when growing up she definitely didn't get the developmental help or correct environment she clearly needed, so yeah, sadly she is likely at least lightly retarded

>>98126538
How good friends all you all with each other? If I was in a similar situation, I'd just sit down with everyone and have that discussion, but I get that it might not be as,simple for every group. "There's a lot to track here and it might be hard when you only play rarely" would be the way I'd frame it. Are you the GM or a player in the game?


>>98127011
Both OP and the post yoy replied to very clearly state that he does blame his friends, not the visiting player, though.

>>98129048
No D&D 5e class is actually complex or hard to understand. They just range from tedious to frustrating. Either you're tracking a bunch of spells, or you've got some bullshit, worthless ability like Favored Enemy where you go
>well that is my one gimmick and it's not relevant here, so I guess I make a basic attack?
Handing someone a high level character and telling them to just play is only going to be a problem because they didn't read and pick/record the abilities themselves. It's not that the classes are hard to understand, but if you don't know what anything written on the sheet is or does, of course you're going to be confused when a bunch of tryhard optimizer spergs keep telling you how to play correctly.

>>98129388
Are you French-Canadian by any chance?
>t. a fellow Fleur-de-lys

>>98129614
They're playing 3.X >>98126771

>>98129696
Point stands either way since 5e is just barely simplified 3.5 with fewer feats and superfluous, space-wasting classes. If someone hasn't read their spells or class abilities, they are going to be confused by a list of silly words on a sheet of paper and not intuitively understand what they mean or what bonuses they give in what situations.

>>98129629
Wut, nah I'm from Poland, why?
Take care there on the opposite side of the world though

>>98126676
>Bard isn't too complicated
It is for your average fairweather tabletop enthusiasts

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>>98126538
>>98126771
>twice a year
Dude fucking nobody is going to remember convoluted dice game rules (beyond the basics at most) if they only interact with them for a few hours once every six months. The human brain is going to discard that shit quickly in favor of using its memory on things actually usefull for the other 99.9% of her life. You don't have to call her stupid to get this changed just point out to her the impracticality of the situation and how you would like to let her change classes to something so everyone has more fun and smack your other players upside the head for being stupid enough to create this situation while you're at it
tl;dr just fucking talk with each other like adults and resolve the issue

>>98129819
>why
Probably because they call Netherlands "Holland".

>>98129903
> just fucking talk with each other like adults
This should become the new HYTNPDND desu; it applies to like 95% of the shit people on this board complain about.

>>98129388
Why are you pretending that she isn't mildly retarded?

>>98130236
>Hello me and my players are are all teenagers ranging from the ages 12 to 15, we are having a dispute.
Now what, Einstein?

>>98130452
You ban them for being underage

>>98129388
>all those symptoms of actual low IQ induced mental retardation
there's nothing bizarre about her if anything she's really typical of that demographic

>>98130481
They got an older relative to post the question for them in accordance with site policy, but that older relative also had a developing case of aphasia that makes them a poor mediator unable to resolve their issue.

>>98130452
nta but I know how to handle that
>Global Rule 2

>>98130236
I remember going to a GM advice panel at some con like a decade ago and everyone would come up to the mic one at a time and tell some veteran game designers and grognards their stories about a problem player they had and each and every time, someone on the panel would lean really close to mic and very deadpan go
>did you try talking to them?
and the answer was almost always no, so the response was
>try talking to them about it.
And when it wasn't a matter that could be resolved with talking like mature adults, the answer was quite simply
>then why are you playing games with this person?

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>>98130652
>My player sometimes drums his fingers on the table and it annoys me
>Did you talk to him about it?
>My player sometimes drowns my other players in the toilet in the bathroom and he says he's just "Getting his 47 on" but I've been investigated by the police for conspiracy to murder 3 times in the past 7 years, what do I do?
>

>>98126538
I've been suffering a lesser version of this for a few years and finally am taking over as DM. The very first note in my campaign primer is "NO BACKSEATING DURING COMBAT". I'm honestly scared one of the players will be unable to contain their autism but I'm not budging on it so we'll see how it goes.

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I don't let any women into my tables beyond very specific exceptions. Not a misogynist or anything, just out of principle.
>friend wants to invite a friend
>sure (first mistake)
>friend of friend asks if he can bring his girlfriend since she also is into TTRPGS
>no problem (second mistake)
>he's a pretty cool guy and knows how to play
>she's alright and also knows how to play
>but for some reason they absolutely despise eachother to death despite being in a relationship
>they go into full blown arguments over the littlest of things during sessions
>straight up screaming, borderline one step away from mauling eachother like chimps
>once they're done they'll spend the rest of the night bitterly shooting passive-agressive comments at eachother
>eventually the girl stops attending
>think we will finally have some peace
>we didn't
>she'd call him during the sessions to start yelling at him
>had to disband the group and form a new one without the two
Nowadays if anyone asks me if they can bring their gf, I give them a very firm no

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>>98130236
OP the dumb faggot is not looking for help. He looking for retarded nogames like >>98132242 to say durr durr women bad derp.

>>98130053
Half of the world calls them that.

>>98129903
>Dude fucking nobody is going to remember convoluted dice game rules (beyond the basics at most) if they only interact with them for a few hours once every six months.
That was my point. So I wanted her to play a fighter. Because that's what I'd play in an RPG I played once a year while not playing RPGs in general. I wouldn't ask for a super complicated class. And that's not her fault, she really doesn't know what she's doing or even asking for. So it falls on these guys to give her something normal to play.

>>98126538
Women like these are basically poison for groups. You really should make sure that she gets kicked out, and do your best not to help her in any way.
Whenever possible, I try to make it as inconvenient as people like that to attend, and assist them as little as possible. That way, eventually the frustration of book-keeping becomes overwhelming and forces a fracture one way or another.

>>98126538
How about you tell the other players to stop backseat playing her character? It's tough to learn anything if someone tells you an answer before you have time to think. No need to tell them why except the general point that combat takes forever if everyone discusses before acting.

>>98126538
"Hey, can you play a fighter or a rogue next time? You don't play every often and playing them would be easier on people who are rusty."

I'm actually autistic, OP, and I still came up with a reasonable answer. Get your shit together.

>>98129388
That sounds like a severe case of ADHD if she's not actively stupid. Try giving her some adderall, fpr science.

>>98132671
>So it falls on these guys to give her something normal to play.
No. You talk to her yourself in a mature manner and resolve the issue instead of sitting on an increasing amount of resentment and inflicting unfun games on yourself and most likely your players too for no fucking reason.

>>98132463
She's not going to fuck you bro

>>98133914
Yes, we can tell you are not going say anything not retarded.