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08/21/20New boards added: /vrpg/, /vmg/, /vst/ and /vm/
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File: pine-barrens.jpg (372 KB, 1920x1080)
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>I didn't hear what you said, Tone
>The guy you're looking for is an ex-commando. Killed 16 Zhentarims singlehandedly.
>Get the fuck out of here
>He was with the Night Masks. Guy's some kind of Westgate Harper
>You're not going to believe this. He killed 16 Chondathans. Guy was a mask maker.
>His closet looked like shit.
>>
>>98813539
Kino
>>
>You see a long stone corridor lit by torches with a solid oak door at the end.
>I check for traps. Natural 20!
>Ralph, this is a skill check.
>So I find the traps?
>There aren't any traps.
>So I see the absence of traps. Therefore, someone wants me to think there aren't any traps.
>The fuck are you talking about?
>I'm role-playing, Tony. I'm thinking like my character.
>He's got a point, T.
>Sil, don't encourage him.
>Then I take 20 opening the door.
>Take 20? The fuck is this? Uncle Junior's Pathfinder campaign.
>It takes 20 times as long, but it counts as a 20.
>So every fucking door in my dungeon takes twenty minutes now? Do you think this is a fucking dungeon HUD gig?
>I'm not going to run in headfirst. That's how you get clipped. My character isn't some stunad like Paulie's.
>He's been at the door for 20 minutes, T. In real life, those orcs would have come up out and asked who the fuck is there.
>Paulie, your character has an Intelligence of 8. You don't get to weigh in on tactical matters.
>I've got a fucking doctorate in this shit. Intelligence of 8? Who the fuck wrote that?
>Paulie, sit down. You wrote it. You asked Chrissie because he knows this nerd shit like Pokey-man cards, and he told you to dump Int when you wanted to make a fighter.
>You open the door. You see four goblins, 1 female and 3 male.
>Is the female goblin hot?
>It looks like a chihuahua gangbang. You hear that, T? I said it looks like a chihuahua gangbang heh heh.
>Ralph, shut the fuck up or so help me god I'm shoving this giant D20 right up your ass. This is why Tracee doesn't play with us no more.
>She was hooah!
>>
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It's an honor to be joined by heroes, and not FAGGOT-ASS CORNHOLIN' WIZARDS LIKE TURNED MY COUSIN INTO A FROG, HE SHOULD FUCKING DIE
>>
>>98820108
I spent 20 years in the can. I wanted to play Vampire. I compromised. I played Call of Cthulhu.
>>
>That's right cocksucker! Go back to Baldur's Gate.
>>
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>The fuck's all that?
>Cameras and custom miniatures. For actual play streaming.
>Lotta money in that shit.
>>
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He never had the makings of an OSR grognard
>>
>How the fuck did Vito shoot me in the back of the head with a crossbow? He's a fucking ogre

> I'm sorry Jackie but he has boots of elvenkind
>>
>>98820108
Take it easy Philemonus, you know the health potion makes you emotionnal
>>
>>98821135
>You look like a Calimshan hoooah
>>
>>98824646
Alaundo predicted this
>>
The DM’s self-insert girlfriend, whatever happened there…



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