>"Thank you for furthering the cause of the Greater Good, gue'la. Here's your beautiful fire caste mandated wife."Still want to join?
>>744226258if that's how she looks at my dick, yes
>>744226258I highly doubt they would give you Shadowsun
>>744226258No idea, have to see how big the honkers are. Rumors say they're giant and milky
>>744226258How do they treat psykers?
>>744226258>im-fucking-plying a tau would ever breed with the lesser races of the empireguelas fuck guelasdeal with it
>>744226258what do tau feet look like?
>>744226258>entire caste system requires galactic powers to not wipe out a critical specialized caste which triggers a systematic collapse>existence rely entirely on being an minor annoyance amidst other much more dire threat to Segmentum Ultramar>speedrunning their own horus heresy with their own dead emperor (Aun'Va's assassination) and the Farsight EnclaveI'd unironically rather be a serf to Trazyn
>>744226258Yes, for the demoralizing effect it would have on the spheres, that Shadowsun of all Tau, has a human husband, thereby weakening Tauspace.I'll take one for the Imperium, with this. Honor my sacrifice, brothers and sisters.
>>744226258>so irrelevant as a faction they don't even appear in the 11th edition trailerGW do not care for the Tau.
>>744226258This sounds like a invitation foe genestealers
What does it taste like?
>>744228005Plastic balloons filled with sand
>>744228802Onion and lemon.
>>744228005weird camel feet.probably not even ticklish.
>>744226549They're literal cows.
>>744226258Would fuck that forehead tripussu
>>744226720dissections or exterminations
>>744226885Breeding is impossible, so Tau and auxiliaries can fuck as much as they want.
>>744229429that's their nose, I think...
>>744229219>probably not even ticklish.
>>744231502Like trying to tickle a giant toe nail
>>744226258>fire castethis is a water caste house friend.
>>744233406>getting adopted by the TauI sleep>making the cow bitches breeding stockNow I'm motivated
Video games? Hello, are there any video games here? Or is this just anther /40kg/ leaky shitpost thread?
>tfw no longshanks gf
>>744233839Why shitpost when we can ragebait?
>>744233839you ok?
>>744233974what are HER feet like
>>744226258uhh YES!!
>>744234160big and extremely ticklish
>>744226258I very much doubt they'd give me Shadowsun. I doubt they'd give Shadowsun to anyone. I doubt they even allow Shadowsun to have relationships at all, or that she even wants them when she could be fighting for the Greater Good.However, if they give me a tau girl like the one from the Exodite, I'll take her any day.
>>744234438fun fact: since they have no faster than light travel in between wars shes straight up put in a freezer and only thawed to do another war.
>>744234438Honestly I find it hard to outright say I'd take a Tau wife unless I had no other option to keep my bloodline human. I don't think there is even any records of cross species procreating. Regardless, I cannot help but see a little bit of those aliens from Enemy Mine(good movie).
>>744234438She has no hair though
>>744234650>I don't think there is even any records of cross species procreatingEarlier editions had literal half eldars
>>744234743Good, I'm not into pubes.
>>744228005gross, like the rest of their bodyt'au are simply not an attractive species, they really have nothing going for them
>>744233974>tfw knives gf/wifexenos could never
>>744234846the feet in that image dont even match the models, I dont know why people keep posting it.
>>744234846>Doesn't even have hooves or a head slit.This shit couldn't possibly be more outdated.
>>744234779>Earlier editions had literal half eldarsBack when Warhammer was more fantasy than scifi. Fantasy humans can pretty much breed with dwarves, elves, and even hobbits. Modern day 40k is in a weird spot of appealing to both spectrums of autists. The racists kind, and the counter culture mocking.
>>744226549Is that Adam Jensen?
>>744228005Like those blue alien arabs from avatar
>>744234885it is official artwork from the tau codexit is as canon as it gets
>>744226258Why do they have the marathon logo on their chest?
>>744226258s-sure
>>74422800530 toes on each foot
>>744235017>this one depiction out of thousands is the cannon one.I dont care that some intern included it in a codex.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTd6dcj6k8Mjoin the greater good, we have cool Mechas.
>>744233839Did you want more gachaslop threads?
I want to impregnate a krootess's shoulders...
>>744233974>Black Templars hate thisJust another reason those bowlcut morons are a blight
The Chaos gods are pretty cool but the only factions they have are le corrupted marinesThat's so boringWhy isn't there some terrifying science fiction demon faction to represent the gods, why is it STILL just marines
>>744235693You mean like the literal existing faction called fucking chaos daemons?
>>744234438Canonical Phil Kelly implied that whenever with Farsight (they were in the wilderness and decided to "share warmth" with a rare to black) and has a semi romantic relationship with Kor'Sarro Khan after they tried killing eachother a few timesIt's weird though since Tau are supposed to be the opposite of Eldar and shouldn't really form Sexual relationships and or experience lust, sex is just reproduction
>>744235842>>>>>>>>sigmemeAnd again, that's just dude scary dogWhere's the goddamn creativity is what I'm asking
>>744235693Thousand Sons and Emperor's Children might have SMs but they have a bunch of daemon units as well.
>>744235017>CodesIt's from xenobiologis or whatever, that book is filled with outdated stuff about Eldar and Orks too
>>744235918>sigmeme????
>>744233974uh.. bros?
Taucow thread?
>>744236205Fully automated hetero space communism
I'm just glad that Warhammer is now appealing to everyone, instead of neckbeard incel tryhard grognards that care about muh lore, muh grimdarkThis way, even trans folx and their kids can play
>>744236384Some of these are written by the daemonculaba author btw
>>744236205You call that a Cau?
>>744236420Wow, these children books were written by the guy that wrote the single thing people bring up when talking about how supposedly DARK the setting isThat means that Warhammer is totally grimdark guys
>>744234329basado
Ke is cute
just posting this since I might as well
>>744236384The one where they all go mad and ritualistically sacrifice the brown girl to Slanesh is pretty good.
>>744236567https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68ugkg9RePc
>>744234160Long, dumbass
>>744234650Considering the Tau have state mandated breeding they have to do, a Tau wife would probably wouldn't mind if you needed to hook up with another human for your own breeding purposes. That's just my headcanon though.>>744235912I don't think the Tau are completely emotionless or else they would have no warp presence at all instead of just a weak presence.
>>744237436>I don't think the Tau are completely emotionlessThe problem is that the Tau are literally being mind controlled by a few space jews, they're a couple steps away from just being tyranids.
>>744226258Shadowsun is fucking ancient
>>744237290Are you talking to me or the other guy?
>>744237493They're not literally mind controlled, it's more like suggestion. The books describe the feeling as if when they disagree with an ethereal, they feel shame and regret, but they can still choose to ignore it if they care enough about the matter. If it was straight up mind control, Farsight would have never been able to secede, even though he's even close personal friends with an ethereal.
>>744237436I'm not saying they're emotionless or that they cannot form any bonds at all (that's what Taliserra is for after all) I think it's odd that they're a species that shouldn't really have normally driven pair bonding since they're a collectivist people who are meant to be like if a herd species became sapient rather than having family units.Shadowsun is an outlier since she does seem to show romantic interest and apparently her blood relatives also live on a private estate. Maybe there was a narrative purpose there or maybe it was the author falling into the real of writing xenos like they were humans
>>744237817how many human cocks do you think she's gotten in her lifetime
>>744238003Shadowsun? Zero. Pic? One.
So there's just not gonna be any video games at all in this thread on the video games board huh.
>>744238116This is obviously yet another offf-topic 40k general thread with some Tau coom sprinkled in.
>>744237918The mind control thing has always been 50/50. Farsight theorizes they use mind control because they ordered that one Tau to perform space seppuku, but it's not like feudal lords needed mind control to make their retainers kill themselves in real life. Later Tau books still play with the idea of it the Ethereals are really mind controlling the Castes or if they're just really good at verbally manipulating them.Someone will probably bring up vespid but they were never mind controlled, those helmets really are translation devices. The grimdark of vespid isn't kind control, it's actually that their culture got accidentally erased by young vespid leaving their home planet in droves and abandoning the vespid booked traditions.
>>744233974
I'm having a really hard time picking a faction, none of them really spark joy in my soul
Is there any official art showing female Tau with breasts?
>>744238003Kor'Sarro's chogorian pecker
>>744238116I mean I'm mainly waiting for Total War 40k, but there's not that much to discuss yet other than "I'm glad the Imperial Guard are there from the beginning".
>>744238179>they ordered that one Tau to perform space seppuku, but it's not like feudal lords needed mind control to make their retainers kill themselves in real lifeThe space seppuku isn't even a secret thing, it's a known punishment Ethereals can order. That one time it sounds like mind control but other references to it don't mention mind control
>>744234846This must be some really old art. Tau have hooves.
>>744238192Read or listen to some of the books
>>744237290I like that she just has Ripley's underwear
>>744238192There's no way at least one or two don't give you a half mast, you probably haven't seen them all
>>744235842Squated soon
>>744238742Certain units I really like, but the faction as a whole I just find boring, and the issue is because of how many boring infantry units you needI was looking at Necron and Tau because /m/fag, but again it had the issue of so many samey unitsKnights kind of avoid this, but their problem is that they only have like 2 or 3 models
>>744238348It's from xenology which is non-canon.
>>744238797>because of how many boring infantry units you needYou don't really NEED to have a billion footmen, it depends entirely on your strategy, you do always want to have some but it's up to you to make them unique.If you wanted to go full /m/ you could just go Imperial Knights like you said but be prepared to sell your kidney.>they only have like 2 or 3 modelsBasically armies are decided by points on each given unit, Knight mechs are essentially giga nigga units equivalent to MANY footmen.They're expensive but because you're only using a few it balances it out a little.And like I said above a lot of the samey effect is completely decided by your painting, there's nothing stopping you from making them uniqueThis boils down to what you really want out of an army, both gameplay wise and looks/paint wise, if your main goal is uniqueness on each basic soldier unit then maybe Orks might be the perfect fit, while recent marine releases in the lash 10ish years have tried to make them a bit more different from each other they ultimately all have their own color schemes and rules while Orks can go ham on whatever the fuck they want and promote creativity.
>>744226258
>>744237290>>744233974what ever happened to this artist
>>744226720They have no problem with the psyker bears so unless you summon demons you are fine
>>744240251Nothing? I'm looking at his account on twitter right now and he has retweeted stuff from today even.
>>744235912Yeah but phill kelly isn't known for lore accuracy
>>744240415oh okhe went dark for awhile, guess hes back
>>744234438That one shadowsun short is about her giving up the option for retirement and reproduction
>>744234846>>744226258If they could add sisters of battle for the posers and the perverts I don't see why GW can't reinvent those alien females to be cute and blue
Everyone wants to fuck TauNobody wants to play Tau
>>744242141I wanna play Tau, and fuck and fight TauIt was very satisfying shooting enemies across the map in DoW with upgraded Fire Warriors and spotters
>>744242141>Everyone wants to fuck TauBecause they're the only alien race with actual alien like females, eldar are just knife ears>Nobody wants to play TauBecause they're boring as shit, their gameplay is boring as shit, their units are boring as shit, their lore is boring as shit.
>>744242141No one wants to fuck Tau, only off model fanartGW are genuinely against appealing and attractive characters in the setting
>>744235912>and shouldn't really form Sexual relationships and or experience lustas a matter of biology or just culture?
>>744242141>Nobody wants to play Taueh, they're about the halfway mark of popularity
>>744242141>play>warhammerlmao good one
>>744242141>Everyone wants to fuck Tau>Nobody wants to play WarhammerFTFY
>>744242553Mostly the latter. We don't know much about how the warring pre-ethereal tribes worked but modern Tau just get a state assigned mate from the Ethereals, they get a few days in the same room together to concieve a child and then seperate and when the child is born it gets handed to a nursery, its shown in the book Shadowbreaker.Theres some eugenics involved where caste only mates within caste and where promising individuals or a few prominent bloodlines are ordered to mate more frequently but its treated more like a job to ensure prosperity of the Tau as a whole rather than something individual. Every now and then there are hints that water caste are "conventionally attractive" for the tau, which is because they're the charisma build Tau and of course they still need some reproductive instinct to get the ponos in the vagoo even if it only lasts as long as the deed
>>744239937heh
>>744242141not trueI play Tau, but also MAYBE want to fuck Tau
>>744235967I'm quite sure it is in the Codex as well.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_l2gtXSKFH4
based loreletthey dont asign wives, they just restrict from what caste you can court
>>744236567Man, they really hate putting cool-looking T'au on their book covers, don't they?
>>744226258she's effectively like 90+ years old in tau yearstau have half the life span and grow up twice as fast as humans barely kept alive by their rather poorly understood gene techweirdly enough the imperium in terms of medical and genetic technology is like light years upon lightyears ahead of the tau for some reason well I say for some reason, but the actual answer is that medical technology and augmentic technology is one of the most preserved things from the DA from both the mechanicus and Emps himself really valuing that shit, and more importantly the mechanicus don't really care all that much about keeping the stuff that preserves flesh secretalso the etherals are actively nerfing the Tau's tech tree away from life extending tech to make sure the normie taus can't have similar life spans as them
>>744246748The Ethereal are really lame, I wish there were some more chill ones.Until then I'll stick to Farsight all day every day.
>>744234438>>744233406>>744235062>>744236205imagine the sideways pussy
>Draw an anime girl>Paint her blue>Call her a Taufucking cringe
>>744247175well i am now
>>744246748The ethereals are really into eugenics, tau having short lifespans is a boon because they want generational cycles to happen fast and with a minimum of resources expended on those past reproductive age. Imperial tier life extension technology would be a detriment because they'd be required to make it available to everyone which would slow down the eugenics work. The imperium on the other hand just doesn't give a shit, manufactorum workers are born, live and die like flies compared to the people that matter who have access to life extensionAlso doesn't help that the imperium's best genetic manipulation in the space marines and custodes required warp fuckery to make it work. Tau can't do psychics, at least not yet, I suspect that might be the point of the eugenics.
>>744226258More like "here's your state mandated castration bro"
>>744226258in the context of 40k, sure why not, ugly wife but with decent (by 40k standards) living is better than giga shithole world (even by 40k standards) where the local nobility can just randomly decided to hunt you like an animal (and your wife still still be ugly because GW cannot into female face sculpts)
>>744235918you do know due to some autism any daemon models from fantasy can also be used in 40k, barring shit like chaos dwarfs or very specific daemon prince characters
>>744249890>excrete enormous amounts of methane gasThis isn't official writing. This shit is just fetish fanfiction.
>>744238348said book came out in 2006 which was only five years after the tau a thing
>yfw you realize humans are the eldritch horrors
>>744239153honestly going full knights might be the cheaper option, yes the individual models are expensive in both monetary cost and time needed to assemble and paint, but you only need a few of them for a full 2000 point army, its the horde armies that are the really expensive ones
>>744250159it is official writing, but its also form an in universe propoganda book for guardsmen, which no guardsman really falls for since it also claims orks hate fighting or something along those lines
>>744249890>they secrete enormous amounts of methane gasWhy is there no Tau fart porn yet?
>>744247175It's Y shaped actually.
>Tau posers at it again
WTF is up with all the tau wife memes?
>>744250524people want to fuck and impregnate an alien what do you mean wtf
>>744250543Yeah but why specifically Tau? You don't see this much with Eldar or even Slaanesh for that matter.
>>744250524Dumb, horny teens.
>>744233974How is it I can just immediately tell this artist does guro?
>>744250671>tau are arguably the most xenophillic race in 40k and therefore are most likely to fulfill the fantasy of "woman who is nice to me">they are also the most exotic race that's arguably human-ish>bovine features have lead some to headcanon them having huge boobs>different castes allow for different fantasies of taugirl types>headcanoning about "ethereal mandated GFs for gue'vesa"
Would techpriest nerd out with a Tau battlesuit?
>>744250790Depends on the techpriest. Some would destroy it without hesitation labeling it as heretical while others would tinker with it to see how it works
All I know about Warhammer40K is tau hentai and whatever Flashgitz chooses to tell me.
>>744250671Eldar used to be the waifu bait race but GW has done them so dirty that the Tau have replaced them.
>>744250790Isn't a battlesuit just a mech with a regular pilot? Any techpriest would cringe at the wasted opportunity to fuse the flesh and machine together.
>>744250790the official stance of mechanicum is alien tech is to be destroyed on site, but as the other guy alluded to, there are so many tech priests that skirt around this that it depends on the individual that and the implication the mechnicus is just the result of them getting psyopped by a ctan shard
>>744250790They'd try to immediately destroy it unless they were a radical xenotech freak.
>>744234964its Dan Te
>>744250289It wouldn't surprise me if the bovine ancestry bit was true, and then they just made everything else up to make them seem non-threatening.
>>744226720You didn't hear about the psychic space bears they like to babysit?
>>744250671Eldar are just humans with long ears and GW has very adamantly removed all human x Eldar stuff until recently with Guiliman having his own Eldar gf.Tau are actually alien looking
>>744251054You're forgetting that it was a ctan defeated and imprisoned by the emperor who also for some reason allowed the mechanicus to worship it, which makes the mechanicus malleable and also removed the worshipping towards him and used the ctan as a vessel.The emperor was on some keikaku shit, he could plan this far into the future but not realize that treating his demigod sons like shit would bite him in the ass.
>>744226720Tau have no soul so they don't care
>>744250524The Tau were created for the Asian marketSo they are animeTurning them into waifus is the next step
>>744252549They do have souls, they just don't have a strong presence in the warp.
orkz iz best
>>744252549They have souls, their soul are just very "dull" so they can't attract demons.
>>744235842I wish they had a Lost & Damned faction to mirror the imperial guard
>>744253528I do! I despise him!
>>744253528>they drew flies around himDidn't even know flies still existed in the 41st millennium
>>744253829daddy nurgle made sure they made it
>>744253865He would
>>744250182As funny as this was the first time, you'd think that a scientific race like tau would know how ancient the stars and planets are and thus how old the universe is. Thus having things older than them out there shouldn't be surprising. On the contrary seeing that their upstart toys can capture and/or destroy all those ancient things with ease that the ancient but unenlightened races still cling to is just an another proof that Tau'va is right and just.
>>744250719Is it, perhaps, the way he renders skin? The anatomical accuracy?
>>744234650>>744234779>>744234936It's literally a single sentence, but it's mentioned that Commoragh has half-human/half-Eldar hybrids living in the city.Also the only 100% canon xenos/human romances are between a human and a Dark Eldar (one in a novel and another in a video game).
>>744253940It wasn't so much about finding things that were older than them, and more the fact that the marine operating the dreadnought had been living in agony and fighting in constant wars for all those thousands of years, he couldn't even understand why or how anyone could live that way. The tau fire warrior in question eventually was cybernetically bonded to his crisis suit in a similar way and then he understood the strength of hatred in enduring a fate like that.
Jerking off and rubbing yourself all over a Kroot girl's back is the ultimate expression of love.
>>744254684Careful anon, if she consumes enough of your splurge, she'll end up related to you
>>744255013Nice
>>744228005are they still not hooves ? or did they change that too recently ?
I wish space chaos were half as cool as fantasy chaos
>>744250790Depends on how eccentric said techpriest will get their hands on a battlesuit. At best you'll get ordos xenos techpriest who will rip it apart and slap parts of it to an existing deathwatch wargear or armor.
>>744228005>>744255303depends on the castethereals have quarian feet, every other cast has hooves, I think
>>744256549>Archaon>AwesomeGrimgor says otherwise.
