Boulder Mon editionPrevious >>59389214>FAQ>What is this?People are turning into Pokemon in the real world. Some are having the time of their lives, and some are struggling to survive. These are their stories.>How do I join?Just start posting.>What's the lore?People and animals (and at least one tree) are changing at random in their sleep, waking up still in the real world, but now as Pokemon, and nobody knows why (that includes you. Please don't try to explain it). Just enough transformations are occurring to notably change day-to-day life without collapsing civilization. This is not the apocalypse, even if it might feel like it to some characters in the moment. Some people are more in touch with their instincts than others, and some have lost more of their humanity than others. That's about it. Avoid legendaries if possible.>What the Hell is PIPS?In many of the stories, the scientific community in-universe has begun referring to Pokemon instincts and the loss of humanity some people who transform experience as Pokémon Induced Psychosis Syndrome, or PIPS. The term is explained in more detail here: https://rentry.org/sip-concepts
Ongoing Stories:>Transformed Into a Lucariohttps://pastebin.com/dNfCG4se>Copanon the PokeWhisperer by Copanonhttps://rentry.co/PolicemanPokemonStory>Digigirl the Abrahttps://pastebin.com/rvUJh1Vd>Professor Decidueye by ProfDhttps://rentry.co/ProfD>VetPhox by Phoxanonhttps://rentry.co/DelphoxStory>Kartanimator by Kartanonhttps://rentry.co/kartanimator>The Pokemon Pit by ProfDhttps://rentry.co/r7aa9bzy>Churchanon by Churchanonhttps://rentry.org/cb24k1ti>Swiss Army Mienshao by Mienshanonhttps://rentry.co/whipping-back-into-action/>No Memories Umbreon by Churchanonhttps://rentry.org/ua24k1ti>Emolganonhttps://pastebin.com/EWkUN7zD>Belarusian Blastoise by Phoxanonhttps://pastebin.com/WAh6Wnkm>Nineanon and Other Nineshttps://pastebin.com/7ngT3v07>Don Garbodor by ProfDhttps://rentry.co/DonGarbodor>Mimikyu Misadventures by multiple anons (open source)https://rentry.co/MimikyuStory>The DAW Reportshttps://rentry.co/ARK-SIP>Bulbanon by Bulbanonhttps://rentry.org/bulbanon>Mukanonhttps://pastebin.com/fftk32tC>Onixnonhttps://rentry.co/Onixnon>Copanon's side storieshttps://rentry.co/PolicemanPokemonSideStories>Kartanon's side storieshttps://rentry.co/kartanimator-disc-b>Mienshanon's one-shotshttps://rentry.org/miensha-oneshots>ProfD's one-shotshttps://rentry.org/ProfDOneShots>Bulbanon's one-shots (open source)https://pastebin.com/yCaEfNP9>Other one-shotshttps://pastebin.com/UtXMsyyD>One-shots that were too spicy for pastebinhttps://rentry.co/SoImOneShots>April Fool's Storieshttps://pastebin.com/dP9nGavs
Archived stories:>Herding Catshttps://rentry.org/HerdingCats>Super Macho Monhttps://rentry.co/MachampStory>0332https://pastebin.com/WMdqhP8H>Tinkanonhttps://rentry.co/TinkatonStory>Not a Pikachuhttps://rentry.co/notapikachu>Lopunanonhttps://pastebin.com/ecBem3sz>Serpent and Wyrm by Snivyanonhttps://rentry.co/SerpentAndWyrm>A Loser and a Lost Snowpix by Drifteranonhttps://rentry.org/tcab223e>The New Police Animals by Snivyanonhttps://rentry.co/larsonkurt>The Human Wimpod Evolvedhttps://rentry.co/GolisopodStory>Sandslash and Ms. Gemstonehttps://rentry.co/h62h6eh7e>Mareanieanonhttps://rentry.co/MareanieStory>Miloticanonhttps://rentry.co/MiloticStory>Drifteranon's one-shotshttps://pastebin.com/4K9M6uJ2Statistics and thread list:https://rentry.org/fd9ise4ohttps://rentry.org/sip-down-memory-lane
>>59437136Shiny charms that "really work"
oh, thanks, OP! I just like to imagine how life would beA) no handsB) Being MASSIVEC) lacking fine motor controlD) being, like, totally bulletproodE) DIG
>>59437150If a human tried to pet you as an Onix, would you even feel it? Or would they have to use some kind of low grit sandpaper?
>>59437155I assume they'd need to aim for the joints or head for it to be felt, but the horn would probably be the most "sensitive" part thanks to them using it to navigate underground and such. Still probably muted, though.
>>59437150One would imagine onix being fitted with basically metal straps around one or more segments, with hooks or baskets or some such attached to them. It could rotate to bring whichever implement it needed around, then with some careful maneuvering perform at least some basic tasks.
>>59437144>”Excuse me sir, I know this is all very startling,”>>AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!>”Yes, quite. I’m from the local university, and have one quick question, if I may ask it.”>>AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!>”Right before you woke up, were you or were you not dreaming?”>>AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!>”Really sir, it’s a simple question. Even a Terrakion should be able to answer it.”
>>59437193Imagine having your new Onix horn touched, and it’s like a shark’s nose so you’re just paralyzed from overstimulation.
>>59437193While a fine idea, there's a high chance it would get crushed or broken VERY easily. Ignore the Pokedex, Onix probably weighs closer to 40 tons. Now imagine trying to tie a belt onto the side of a rolling, sentient Tank. Still, a prosthetic rig MIGHT work, but the sheer size mismatch might make things even harder. I do have some plans for later on in the story to communicate, though.
>>59437212Was meant for >>59437156>>59437193Imagine building something like https://youtube.com/watch?v=1SgGfMlbCoM for an Onix
>>59437212Yeah.Jeez.That'd suck. Especially considering THAT is what you'll hit on the ceilings in anything bar warehouses.>>59437219Ever since I became aware of the weakness of my flesh, it sickened me.Etcetera, etcetara.
>>59437217You'd either hold that segment still during travel, mount it to one of the smaller segments so the bigger ones up front would provide clearance since they define the tunnel size, or cluster the tools in one region of the belt so theyre not forced to be underneath the Onix. Given that onix is of course a rock type, one could even imagine carving a shallow groove for the belt to recess into. Maybe even the tools themselves on a pivot mount.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=VbrMZd2Cd1g&t=254s>me when I wake up as a Froakie
>>59437246Here's the second image.Observe in amazement, my sublime penmanship.Anyway, it would still be a hack of a lot of trouble. I also get the feeling that Onix would kind of regenerate if you carved a groove? Plus, while sensations are muted, that would HURT. The best option would probably be to mount a pen stylus on the end of his tail so he could write on a notepad or something, Onix are pretty dextrous. Probably.
Summer is relentlessly testing our resistance to heat-related stress, so why not enjoy a pleasant stay at your local river to cool down?https://rentry.co/in-your-elementThe story takes place in the very same continuity as WBIA, but while Etienne's story is currently stuck somewhere in September or October, this (for now) oneshot takes place in the Summer of the next year; so like 8-9 months later. I'm not sure whether I continue this one, but I consider it an experiment to write in prose and to give you a taste of the Swiss de facto capital, as well as something more light-hearted.If you search for "Marzili" on Google Maps, you can use Street View to see quiet a few of the locations I described. Happy exploring!
>>59437328Yeah you could do a lot with some kind of tail tip prosthetic id imagine
>>59437353Minigun tail prosthetic.Yes.
>>59437328Based usage of MS Paint, reminds me of the old days. The story itself was cool too! I'm not a huge fan of the cliché that a turnee doesn't realise for way too long that they, in fact, turned. The visuals were amusing to imagine all around, though, and I hope you expand on the idea.>first time using RentryYou're good, although I would recommend that you add a table of contents if you decide to add more chapters. There's a "how" link on the bottom navigation on Rentry, as well as a tab when you edit it. Also have a look at your headings – chapter two only has one # instead of two. You can actually look at other Rentry pages and hit the "edit" button to see how others have formatted their page.
>>59437369Thanks! I'm actually using a site called Kleki, but it's basically upgraded MS paint. I've never had any talent, but I have the image in my head, so it'd be shame to waste it.I was kinda leaning into the whole "No way this actually happened" Brain straight-up rejecting the obvious facts it's been presented with for a short time, hence trying to hide behind the car without realizing just how big he was. I'm glad you liked it overall...And thanks for those pointers! I'll adjust it when I do the next chapter. Appreciate the enjoyment!
>>59437344Woo! Funiculars mentioned!
>>59437356Onix probably doesnt need the help to do violence, but underrated movie.
>>59437344>35 degrees guillotine = 95 degrees burgerReminder for pet owners, the ground gets really damn hot. It’s no joke that you can literally fry an egg on the sidewalk in hot weather. Kilian was doing a public service helping everyone out, but he should probably look into those shoes sooner rather than later
>>59437388>Woo! Funiculars mentioned!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XW0W7j04iRQLiterally the only time you can post this for something other than lol Italy
>>59437344A fun, cozy one-shot. Nice work.
>>59437006You might be the first to add a new story after the bump limit. But hey, we'll take 11th hour fresh meat.First of all, this guy might be even more everyman coded than Mukanon, somehow, to the point where the preamble almost begins to feel unnecessary. I will say though that disbelieving everything so hard that you actually become willfully ignorant is very much a mood in this day and age... depressingly enough...>Something goes VERY WRONGWell we ain't here to listen to you blandly talk about cars, mate...Okay, so the old dude just had a massive fuck-off rock snake appear right in front of him, drove his car into it, and his response to this is to ask the rock snake if it's okay. Old mate is either incredibly polite or perhaps slightly dementia-addled and doesn't fully grasp what's actually going on. Could easily be both...>cold stone floorThe vast majority of a road's composition IS crushed stone, so while the wording here has a weird mouth feel, it isn't inaccurate. I guess when you work on cars for 15 years and have no hobbies and nothing else in your life you learn these things...Don't you just hate it when your voice is replaced by gargantuan, stony snake roars? Such an inconvenience...Mark rolling around trying to find his non-existent arms puts me in mind of Miloticanon flopping like a fish, just with an ultra-slowed down version of the Spongebob theme.>It sounds like someone towing a ten-ton boulder behind a tank.And definitely not an Abrams.>Mark's no animal.Is rock snake a magical beast or a construct?>his BEDROOM wall"No! That's where I go to be bland!"I like how he keeps trying to grasp at straws for a rational explanation until it finally hits him. Reality ain't gonna let you bury your head in the sand any longer, I'm afraid, Mark. Well I mean... theoretically an Onix could easily bury itself ENTIRELY in sand, but you get it...
>>59437950>But, on the good side, both Mark and the man both survived!"The driver and fireman had jumped clear!">He's an Onix. The Onix is He.Nice of you finally join us, Mark. You are not just a boulder, but a rock. Honestly, can't even blame you for the Heroic BSOD that follows...Overall, I'd say this one could do with a little more sauce. For now, the sheer novelty of the transformee being an Onix is doing a lot of the heavy lifting, I think. Hopefully we can get more descriptiveness and characterization moving forward. Fortunately, there are any number of interesting and amusing places such a transformation can go.>>59437344Oooh, did new peak just drop?Hehe, I like the qualifier. Not "open", just "opener".The wording on the poster is fun. "All animals are welcome, including you!" Gee, thanks.Funiculì, Funiculà!You must embrace the patpats, Kilian. You know what? I'm gonna read all his dialogue in Kilian Experience's voice, just for the lulz. Everyone being super-warm towards him is refreshingly wholesome.Pretty sure an otter of all things is fine to eat before swimming, but hey...Oh hey, it's Falinksanon! We never did get more about how his consciousness being split six ways works. I'd love to get some more insight into that. Zangoose and Seviper is also cute.It takes time for humans to adjust to a new normal, but once they do...If it's such a perfect spot it's a wonder no one else took it.>leaving his bag in the care of the old treeThe wonders of a high-trust society. And yet Kilian still exercises reasonable caution anyway. Smart lad. Never heard of these bags that double as flotation devices before, so that's cool. As with Eti's story, we're learning so much about Miensha's homeland in these stories!It's kinda neat to see a story address the fact that most animals don't sweat, even if in SMD every protag has a sweatdrop sprite.
>>59437966Heh, normally a large group of people all marching towards some inevitably would be a sign of a dystopian nightmare. Fair to say I like this is better.Pfft. Your paws are more resilient right up until the tipping point where that no longer matters, huh mate?>sandals for BuizelI'm sure Emma could pull that off."Damn, wish I could spit water on my own feet." - the humans, probably>it was time to help his fellow humansN'aww, what a wholesome bean!Holy shit, an actual use for Water Sport! It's a Haaanukkah miracle! This is a rare instance where "and everybody clapped" actually feels appropriate.>feet-saving service I chuckled. This (along with how much the prospective of lifeguard work made his ears prick up) is potentially a more subtle instance of the influence of Pokemon instincts, since the Floatzel line is given to being helpful and rescuing people.This dad's maybe a little bit Pokeracist, but still polite. Poor Kilian.The photos, not unlike Maxi's illustrations, definitely add to the vibe, and Kilian's jump is already vibe-tastic.>He was finally in his element!Roll credits.It's always a treat to get underwater perspectives like we had with Miloticanon and Golisanon.Yep, it is indeed peak. Super cozy and wholesome. You can really tell this is written by someone who thinks very highly of his country and its people. As I said - refreshing stuff. Miensha, you've done it again.>he could, that was more than enough reason for him.Amen. Boy's got the right attitude about his transformation.>Liking the general vibeHe's not the only one>the fluffball of joyHearts in eyes emoji.Man, I am so jealous of creatures that can shake dry...Heh. Slowpoke holding everybody up. That's gold.I guess the line at the restaurant's emptied out by this point.>Life was good, despite giving him fur, paws, and a hard time on the job market.And we're all too happy to share that good life with you, Kilian.
>>59438025Yep, it is indeed peak. I absolutely love it. Not everything has to be pulse-pounding action - just the wholesome vibes of this carry it effortlessly. Still, Kilian becoming a lifeguard has great potential for some fun, lighthearted PAW Patrol-like adventures if you wanted that, or maybe even a bit of Reality Ensues if he, for instance, failed to save someone or had to try to perform CPR or something like that. Or you could just do more of the underwater vibes stuff and emphasize that aspect more. I for one think you've got an exceptionally solid foundation here if you decide you want to continue this story. Obviously you'd want to characterize Kilian more going forward, but that can come in due time.Once again, Miensha, you've knocked it out of the park.
>Mitchell trying a Raichu on for size
>The new world is full of surreal, yet ordinary moments
>I got the photo and it looks good. Now stop aura farming for your instagram and get down from there!
>It's good I didn't have to move too far, isn't it...?>I should think this is a good thing, but...>I miss my little home station.>It was so much simpler.>I never really wanted to be much of a performer, not outside of doing callouts anyway...>Being one half the week feels weird.>I guess I shouldn't complain, at least, not too much.>Should be thankful kids are polite enough to not try and pet me, if anything.>...it's fun getting to teach them about how trains work every now and again.>Even if they don't seem to pay full attention most of the time.>Although, I wonder...>Is the boss doing alright back home all on his own?>Ah, what am I saying, he likely found a replacement by now...>Some things aren't too different, at least.>With tickets for the line I got asigned to being as exclusive as they are, at least the cars never fill up more than they should.>Thank god I passed up on that offer to work the Yamanote line back in the day, I'm not jealous at all of the people who have to deal with the subway crowds...>...even if they had cooler trains than the ones that tended to stop by Yudakinshuko...>It's nice getting to be on the passenger cabs every now and again, at least.>But... It's also nice seeing my request to be a proper conductor more than just a play-pretend one for the kids go through.>Nice surprise hearing how proactive the company's been in terms of making sure the cars accomodate both passenger and conductor pokehumans.>Having direct contact with the Pokemon company due to collabs like these helps, I don't think the other railway companies have been able to talk with the original character designers about how Pokemon would interact with their trains this thoroughly.>...>What's up next in my playlist, anyhow...https://youtu.be/SQG41IIoEfI>...Heh.>Funny, Mother's train travel was what made me so fascinated with trains in the first place.>Never could've predicted I'd turn into a character from one of the games the Mother devs worked on.
>>59439947>Just because I'm a mascot doesn't mean I don't want to do my actual jobUnderstandable.
What the dog doin?
>>59439947Surprisingly moody (in a good way) for a story about a Pikachu working on an eye-wateringly themed train.It gets at something deeper about how we all want to be recognized for what we know or who we are, rather than simply what we are.
Your daily reminder that living with Pokemon gets weird sometimes.
>Coworker has to go to sensitivity training again because she keeps screaming whenever she sees our IT guy who turned into a galvantula
>>59441501Vivo exposure therapy. Though unrelated, I wonder how an arachnophobe would react to becoming a spider.
>Yeah boss, I'm gonna be late.>Well, I was changin' my brakes out on the driveway and I was almost done>Then some purple blob monster oozed on up and ate one of my wheels>The whole fuckin' thing, rim and all>Yeah, I'm gonna call an uber>The ride'll be reimbursed right?>...>The fuck you mean this don't count as a work expense?
>>59441501>Now I have to go to sensitivity training because I admitted I avoid the break room whenever the weezing from accounting is in there>Someone also reported my joke about poison types working at the Taco Bell next door
>>59442088Five minutes with HR and they'd probably forgive him.
>>59442088You need to stop being so typist, anonpoison types are people too ya know!
>>59443260>"Poison types are people? It wasn't a Normal type that rotted my lunch when he walked by my desk!">"It wasn't a Water type that made them tear out the carpet!">"And it sure as shit wasn't a Psychic type that sent Cindy to the hospital!">"Poison types are people? Poison types are a menace! You're fired!"
Don't show mukanon these last few posts
It would be so hard to make Pokemon sports fair
>>59444775My memory is failing me, who is the guy holding the ball closest to the foreground?
>>59444845Vigoroth, middle evolution between Slakoth and Slaking.
>You refuse to give up driving>You end up driving a slightly oversized RC car
>>59445163
>>59445877Guys, be honest. Would you give up your seat on a bus/train/subway for a person turned into a Pokémon? Male or Female? What if you couldn’t immediately tell?
>>59445163>The DMV says my RC car isn't street legal>Have to pay out big to get a sedan modified to accommodate my new cutiefly body>No insurance company will cover meIt aint easy being small
>>59445163Pow! Pow! Power Wheels!
>>59446682>For mons that could take a bipedal stance, children's e-scooters soon became a popular commodity>It doesn't take much work for those things to go a lot faster than they have any right to>Maybe they're not fast enough for a two hour commute on the freeway, but they're good for restoring a guy's sense of independence>Not so great for avoiding yapping dogs, though.
Yeah sure, you can worry about paying rent and having a job and everything, but don’t forget to at least try a few simple pleasures, like chewing on a stick or rolling on your back!
>>59446429On the bright side your grocery bills are much smaller
>>59447663Imagine a group of small mons, e.g. no one taller than 0.5m / 1.5” tall, converting a home into essentially a boarding house for all of their fellow small mons. You could split the cost of food since portion sizes are so much different, and maybe even split the rooms in half horizontally so you don’t have so much wasted space overhead and you get the psychological benefit of a roof over head (obviously without being too close). If they pool their purchasing power, they could get genuine quality small furniture custom made instead of just toys or 3D printed stuff. They wouldn’t have to be cramped like apartments, each one could still have a decent amount of space.
>>59447732>the Zootopia housing project but for pokemon.
>>59447882I was playing around with the idea of a story about a community of turnees who had all turned into frightening looking pokemon.Tired of people screaming at the sight of them or being ostracized by humanity they decided to band together and form their own town somewhere that was once abandoned.It owuld mostly consist of bug types like pinsir and oddballs like claydol.
>>59447919That sounds like a pretty nice setup for a story. Any reason why it never got out of the "thought about" stage?I could see some inspiration from Frankenstein or Beauty and the Beast.
>>59447964I just didn't have any characters or plots in mind that I could get excited enough to write about.Maybe I'll return to the idea but I've got something else cooking.If someone else wants to use that concept they certainly don't need my permission.
>>59448003>>59447964>>59447919Sounds like it could land anywhere from Oliver Twist to Hotel Transylvania with how serious they take it. I’d love to hear someone take this on.
>Honey?>Honey!>Darling!>Babe!>You need to wake up, something happened!>…>Don’t be mad.
>>59448292So many people's relationships would collapse because they would not actually love her if she was a worm (or a Quilava).
>Alright, let’s go over everything one more time>You couldn’t be too careful with your own health and wellbeing at stake>You had lightly dusted your talons (feet? It still felt more natural to call them feet) with chalk to make sure you didn’t slip>You had removed as many of the arrows from your wings as you could so you wouldn’t poke yourself>Your usual dress pants were exchanged for lose gym shorts>The sweatband was… mostly an affectation to put you in the mood>The gym was all set up with mats on the far end and no one set to come in>Your phone camera was in position on a tripod ready to record>Your… trainer had reserved and cleared the room for you>Still felt weird to say you were a Pokémon and had a trainer, but you reminded yourself that it was the normal word to use for someone at the gym who helped you with exercises>The fact they were so hands off and let you “figure things out on your own” was a blessing, even if it might be avoidance and only delaying the inevitable>”Avoiding attention” and “flying overhead a densely populated downtown college campus” were mutually exclusive>Baby steps… Baby steps…>This whole semester, you had been working with her off and on to develop both your mind and body>You tried not to be anxious or self conscious, but sometimes you just don’t want someone watching you when you’re still figuring things out>You weren’t ready to just go out and soar from building to building yet, that would be absurd>But it was time to make a major step forward and start putting things together into the fundamentals of flight>To say you were scared wasn’t quite right>But…>No, that was it, don’t kid yourself
>>59449050>There are so many things to think about in each stage of flight, many with split second margins and timing>The goal was to practice each of the steps and have them come naturally so you could eventually string each of them together>You had the math on your side after having done the calculations yourself, It was all theoretically possible>But having the mentality to do it was something else>Studying the kinetic chain might help you understand how something works, but doing it with your body is another thing entirely>Alright! Enough stalling! (was that a flight pun?)>You had already done planking exercises for the “cruising” phase of flight to keep your legs from dropping down and increasing drag.>Removing human mental barriers was just as important as building muscle.>You’re never supposed to lock your knees right?>Well it turns out, you can and maybe should for longer flights as it seems to hold them in place>You didn’t need to constantly “flex” the muscle, you were able to just “hold it” without effort>The task of the day was takeoff>Trying to jump straight up like a typical human only got you so far>The breakthrough came after watching both videos of long jumpers and of owls taking off>You have to launch yourself forward and upward>Projectile motion was a common feature of pre-calculus word problems as it made understanding a parabola easy>You weren’t going for maximum forward movement, but you would need some air moving over your wings to get you started, so you aimed for an angle a bit larger than 45 degrees. 60 felt right>Once in the air, you could start unfolding your wings and worrying about the transition to flight>For now, you needed to just practice that launch and getting your legs up and out of the way>Understanding it by comparing it to crouch-jumping in an old video game was something that you’d keep to yourself
>>59449055>No one around to judge and a soft landing zone, this was as good a chance as any>3>2>1>Go!>You began running down the track laid out>1>About 11 feet, just enough for five strides>2>Not sprinting, just enough to get you moving>3>Get ready to jump, up and forward>4>Arms wide out! Legs up!>PUSH>*FWUMP*>Lying face first in the vinyl wrapped foam made you suddenly aware of two things in particular>A: Thank goodness you don’t have a nose to break anymore, or that might have done it>and Two: that beak is still connected to your skull>Oof that could’ve hurt if you weren’t on a mat>But you were on a mat for a reason, keep going! Few more reps in!>You walked by and double checked your phone was recording before taking another pass>What was it you were looking for?>Consistency was probably key right?>*FWUMP*>No need to try to flap yet, just get into position>Keep your eyes forward, if you were going to fly, you would need to look wherever you’re going>*FWUMP*>That one felt good!>Better check the tapes later>Tapes haha… were you a bit young to be showing your age?>*FWUMP*>That one felt worse somehow>Stay focused this time>*FWUMP*>Back on track, just need to build muscle memory>Practice until it is automatic>*FWUMP>Just a few more>…>…
>>59449058>…>Alright, that’s good enough for a break>You stopped the recording and sat on the mat to watch it back>Just have to scrub through and adjust the slow-motion>There! Got it.>Yes, it was an oversized owl man running then taking a leap onto a pile of mats>It looked half like some teenager slacker character crashing into an oversized couch for a music video>The rainbow vinyl of the mats certainly didn’t help that >But you looked closer and found more>Your legs folded up out of the way exceptionally quickly>You never landed on the talon, always on the front “flat” of the leg>The wings were even more impressive>The trials you felt best on, you noticed something specific>After checking multiple takes…>When you opened your wings flat just before the apex of the jump…>You actually glided forward>Another step forward towards flight>You were doing it!
>>59449061Professor D's extremely analytical mind is making this a lot harder for him than if he let his instincts run the show. But then, if he did that, he wouldn't be Professor D. Good and fun update.
>>59449086Not everyone can be Lynn.Who from my reading was possibly already insane before she turned into an Abra.
Rentry updated: https://rentry.co/ProfDThe birdman will fly! These things just take practice.>>59449086That’s the thing, he’s not ignoring them, they plainly don’t exist in his head. He has to figure it out on his own.
>>59449016>Now how do I get her to break up with me in a way that doesn't piss her off and end with my home being burned to the ground? I know! I'll try this one...>"Look babe, we aren't even in the same egg group anymore. That means no kids.">"That's okay, love. Didn't I already tell you I'm not interested in having children?">Drat.
>>59448292This is just adorable. Who in their right mind would be mad if something like that woke you up?>>59449061Oh my god, it's happening!I know how awkward it is to see yourself on video, but I have to wonder, with you not looking like yourself anymore, would the sensation be better or worse? On one hand, you would know that this Mon is you, but on the other hand it kinda isn't at the same time. I think the awkward feeling would be amplified once you fully realise that this Pokémon was, in fact, you, and it *is* you that does those weird un-human things.
>>59450214That’s a good point I really like. I imagine he would just be comfortably numb to the whole thing by this point through the doublethink of both it being you and not really you. I have more thoughts on the matter but I can figure out how to phrase them properly.
Bullies were always a pain for both their victims and the teacher. While throwing punches was already bad enough before the phenomenon, it got worse after turnee kids were allowed back onto school grounds. The bullies got more aggressive while the victims retaliated with more force. Some schools had to create new departments solely to handle suspensions, and every room was fitted with emergency equipment like fire extinguishers and heat blankets.
>>59451338Will this fight go the anime way where the two learn respect for each other through battling and become good friends that go on adventures together? Or will it simply be another event in a chain of the bully getting away relatively scott-free as the kid who tries to defend himself is punished? A lot of the social contract breaks down when someone genuinely has superior power over others. How do you effectively punish a child that can create poison or lightning or fire? What does a Pumped Up Kicks situation look like in a world with Pokemon people?
>>59451338>Those parents who are in complete denial that their primeape child has gone feral from PIPS and insists on sending them to school anyway
pokemon TF autism on /v/ >>>/v/743890245
>>59452697Yeah it's relevant, but it's like 50% fetish talk. Not very interesting.
>>59452697>>59452792Life as a Lapras Taxi sounds like a sitcom plot or reality show >”If there’s one thing I’ve learned, you never know who’s going to show up on that dock!”
>>59445163I mean that would be the fulfillment of my dreams as a 10 year old
>You probably should have been visiting your dad more often, or at least calling and checking in>He was always the strong, proud, and silent type>Even with mom gone, he always looked out for what was best for you>After saving up and succeeding in the big city after college, you decided it was time to at least visit your old man>Head out to the sticks and talk face to face for the first time in a few years>You invited him out for ice cream so you could talk over future plans>You had hoped he would give you the straight talk about if he needed assistance or not>When you arrived, you heard a voice you could have picked out of a crowd of a million>>”If you’re not five minutes early, you’re late!”>The face it came out of, however, was one you had never seen before.>>”But I am very glad to see you. Hope you don’t mind I started early. I’ve got more of an appetite these days.”
>>59439947After becoming as much of a celebrity as a Pikachu transformee on the Pokemon-themed train realistically would, yearning for the simpler times is entirely understandable. Denji is a simple soul who favours a simple life, it seems.Heh, so he's not working the busiest line on the network, at least? Hey, small victories. The thought of companies all around the world having to consult with TPC to learn how to accommodate transformees is hilarious. Doubly so when most of TPC probably doesn't have any better idea than they do. That old "Dumb Ways to Die" PSA we used to have for Australian trains would have a very different complexion if it had Pokemon in it...I like the contemplative tone here. He's pondering all the upsides and downsides of his new life, as people do in response to big changes. The picrel definitely sets the right mood. Would love to see more from Denji - maybe how he navigates some of the actual challenges of doing his job as a PIkachu, or even emergencies that can happen. Lots of potential there.>>59453657A steady, hard-working, self-sacrificing father is rewarded for his diligence with floof, power, and the ability to make the worst "does a bear shit in the woods?" jokes imaginable. Works well as a one-shot, but also a wholesome premise for a full story. Urshifu being dad-coded feels surprisingly natural after the initial "bwuh?" reaction.
>>59446429Actually driving a clown car at this point. I want to see the mechanical breakdown of something like this.
>>59454137>Drive something scaled like a lifted bro-dozer>It's barely as high as the hood of a Miata
Uppies
>>59454137A growing number of cars are “drive by wire” these days as electrification has made everything a sensor instead of controlling physical components. All you would need is to downsize all of the controls to something they could use.
>>59454954And construct one heck of a booster seat.
<begin: TransCrypt 1.17 stt program recording><write to: selected text input>Fuck fuck fuck.They were right. I knew I should've been more careful. Why didn't I think they were on to me? The files, they were doctored. Watermarked, whatever the sci-fi bullshit term is. I don't have time to remove the embeds now, but at least anyone who clicks those won't get fucked. It all leads to me, and they'll be here any moment.This will probably be the last you guys hear of me. I couldn't find the rest of the files for Saffron, but just as with Civic I know they're somewhere. I just don't......Agh, never mind. The past is over. The database is offsite and secure, at least, and I have this thing set to upload on end recording. They won't expect that.Fuck! I should have asked him if what I read was true when I had the opportunity to meet that fucking Linoone. I knew it was too fucking crazy. It doesn't matter now. I know the double owes do some shady shit, so that's what I get for believing it blindly. Just need to hurry and......We know you're in their dock. Come on out! You making it harder is just.Fuck me. Fuck fuck fuck. This captcha. How does this shithole site get worse as time goes on? Hurry the fuck up... Done. Now to upload the file. No time for formatting now.<file upload: https://rentry.co/Saffron-4 >Good. At least this will be online. It'll be the last I stand back for breach.Fuck me. Alright I'll just say that I believe him now. No correlation. The dowel won't get it out of their minds but I won't just stand by and fuck go go go we're in we're in. Get the fuck off of me you damn bastards! Get off on the floor now. Hold him down. Yes, use it!...Docks sedated. God what a fucking nightmare. I never thought it would've been him, huh? I guess he had remorse for... Wait. Is this thing still recording? Quickly, shut it off then--<end: TransCrypt 1.17 stt program recording>
>>59455498(Out of character and spoilers:)Thank you again anons for reading! Predictable story? Maybe, but I wanted to give the characters a nice send-off and, well, it seems wish fulfillment is a cheesy but effective way of going about it, so I hope these were at least enjoyable; it's not often I write happy endings so it was a nice change of pace, but perhaps one I might need improvement in lol.It was fun writing for /sip/ but I do think that this is going to be the last of my stories so please don't go about expecting more from me. Nonetheless I now get all the free time to catch up and keep reading the stories posted here so keep at it, anons! It was nice to make my own little contribution to this thread and I look forward to seeing what others contribute going forward!
>>59455506Aw. Thanks for writing for us, Ark; it's been a fun ride, and your stories are top notch. We'll miss you!
>>59455506Lovely ending for the story. There's absolutely nothing wrong with a happy ending, especially not a happy ending done well.
>>59455498Sometimes I hate being right...Wait, ARK-anon was the doctor? I guess that's what the chairforce gets for letting the panic of the phenomenon fuck their normal hierarchy over a park bench... Welp, guess this is it. Maybe we'll finally learn why these reports were classified. Let's see here...Seems kinda weird that Civic's blood loss not only stopped, but seemingly reversed. Losing their bag in the fire, though? Makes sense.Defeat and failure aren't always the same, Saffron. It is possible to make every correct move and still lose. Now Civic, on the other hand...>I'm uh American"I'm not entirely sure, my head trauma's pretty extensive."I'll buy the Froslass understanding but not speaking English. Time for elite diplomancer Saffron to get some answers. Too bad Civic isn't here to take notes, but on the other hand he'd probably just try to shoot her again.Yep, Froslass instincts, kinda figured. Seems Civic, again I remind you the guy who supposedly knows about this stuff, pretty much mallet-pounded every Froslass berserk button possible. Great job, buddy. Great job. Saffron does a respectable job interpreting, but it's a little unclear whether Froslass caused the fires inadvertently or if the villagers were trying to smoke her out. Either way, not exactly something that really needs to be classified...>I've never been good with kidsDoing a better job than... you know what...? I should probably stop dunking on Civic. At least he was the only one who had to suffer consequences for his actions. Am I the only one wondering HOW exactly the Froslass managed to stop the bleeding?We see here the short-sightedness of children. She won't let them leave and won't let them be rescued, condemning them to a slow, painful death by starvation (assuming Civic doesn't ultimately succumb to his injuries first). Time to get creative, soldier...
>>59455601Okay, not quite what I had in mind, but grass blankets is a start. Using your powers to do average everyday things is an important step on the road to fully incorporating your human and Pokemon selves.I believe you're not easy to scare, Saffron. You're far too bland to be skittish....okay, nevermind, I was just talking about consequences but apparently the phenomenon saw fit to REWARD Civic for his hubris instead. Honestly, if the public at large knew about Civic's story, I could definitely see that leading to some "why won't God heal amputees!?"-type backlash, not to mention significantly increasing the profits of all those snake oil (Ekans oil?) salesmen promising that you can totally transform into the Pokemon you want if you just rub some of this over-priced ginseng under your armpits or whatever. So maybe it IS for the best that this report is secret, just not for the reason the government thinks...>I had nothing to do with thisMaybe you were actually the one that stopped the bleeding, at least? But yeah, the phenomenon HAS been known to undo ailments the human form was suffering from. Just ask Joel.>I worried if the DAW would see it that way.Yeah the debrief on this one is gonna be... special...Civic, you know damn well your forme will change with the seasons. You... DO know that, right...? This dude worries me frequently...I'd give Civic more grace for not being able to stay on task under the circumstances if never being able to stay on task wasn't just his default. At least Saffron gets to have a little catharsis after having had to feel useless for so long.I definitely get Saffron wanting to try to salvage some success from all this and not hang around with all the corpses. Looks like his instincts are also driving him forward. The call to adventure can be a difficult one for an everyman to resist.
>>59455606It's actually rather heartwarming how easily Saffron's instincts come to him now. Being able to feel all of nature around you would be heavenly. One wonders if he was always going to need a near-death experience to be able to access them or if the oppressive atmosphere of the DAW made him subconsciously not want to acknowledge the Pokemon instincts. Looks like Civic isn't having (much) trouble... makes sense given his disposition...Gotta be honest, anons, I'm really getting worried here. I've been half-joking about the military's naked incompetence being the only reason this needed to be censored, but, no, genuinely... I'm just not seeing anything all that damning here... I'd hate to think someone went down for all this for nothing...>stranger things than a field appearing atop a mountain.You have no idea, mate...So the regular Shaymin flower works for him even though it doesn't match the one on his head. Makes sense, honestly. One wonders if actual Saffron flowers would also work, but somehow I doubt it. Realistically they probably tried that already at some point.>they tasted more like home than saffron.Just Pokemon instinct things.Wait, so you WERE enveloped in light, and yet you doubt it was like evolution in the games, where the Pokemon is enveloped in light? You wanna run that one by me again, Saffron?I guess his new senses didn't fully fade, but just enough as to not overwhelm him anymore. It does make sense that Pokemon evolution (or forme change, as the case may be) wouldn't be an intensely physical experience. It's a process heavily steeped in magic and the power of the soul. It isn't as simple as stretching and morphing the body - it's more transcendental than that.In the air immediately and with little in the way of second thoughts. What a contrast from Prof, huh? Or from Nick who tried that, but scuffed it.
>>59455611The triumph of Pokemon instinct and human desire coming together in perfect harmony in a moment like that must be almost transcendental. This must've been what Nick felt the first time he managed to properly get into the air.>stronger PIPS Maybe. But if I were forced to bet on the person least likely to lose themselves to it, you'd definitely be close to the top of the list, Saffron. You seem to be doing the responsible thing after the fact, despite both your elation and the incompetence that surrounds you. Once again I really can't fault ya.Heh, sound like the report took longer to write than Saffron expected. Ain't that typical?...and, yeah, I was afraid of that. It's a nothingburger. It's a complete nothingburger. We know from his last post that ARK/Doc felt guilty about something and that's probably why he was doing all this (MAYBE Civic went full feral? But that's pure speculation on my part), but what that thing actually is is simply not contained in these files. All we have is (relatively) innocuous military incompetence, a village and one of their operatives getting tragically yeeted by a Froslass (who incidentally I guess just fled after locking Saffron and Civic in the building? That's not gonna be healthy for anyone else who happens to inhabit the mountain's general vicinity...), which was not their fault at all and anyone with eyes can see that, and the American military securing some goddamn flowers. Oooh, so very damning!Yeaaah. It do be like that sometimes. The leaker gets Epsteined (probably), blissful ignorance is maintained, and the world keeps on spinning. Just another misdeed among many. I know you're not reading this, but ARK? I'm sorry we weren't able to help you. Let's at least hope whatever you were trying to tell us about didn't destroy Saffron's life. He deserves better than that...Welp, time to listen to something melancholic and stare at the wall for a bit...
>>59455506It's kind of funny how for Saffron it's an ending so sugar-sweet as to almost border on glurge, but very much NOT a happy ending for the guy that was sharing his story. It makes for an interesting (if not slightly jarring) contrast, while leaving us the readers hankering for more even though we know it will never come. I can appreciate you wanting to keep it brief and end on a high note, though. I know I for one am very much in favour of writers practicing their happy endings more.And who knows? You say you won't be writing more now, but perhaps /sip/'s other stories will unexpectedly inspire you? Only one way to find out. Hope you enjoy in any case. I for one am of the firm belief that there is some truly great stuff in /sip/'s archive.
>>59455652Maybe the Good Doctor will be able to get off on a technicality since all of this Pokemon stuff is so new? Here’s hoping he doesn’t get an all inclusive beach vacation water boarding at Guantanamo Bay. Come to think of it, we have a lot of rule followers in this thread don’t we? Soldiers and police and teachers? Not very punk rock of us. The baddest ass among us is probably the vet that doesn’t have two fucks to rub together.If nothing else, a short one-off if an idea strikes you is always welcome! You could be the spark for someone else!
>>59455667Considering the rather cynical age that we live in, I think the very notion that the world ISN'T ending was an optimistic enough idea all on its own to lend itself naturally to stories about those who propagate the status quo as opposed to those who defy it. Pokemon itself has also historically lent itself more to cuddly escapist fantasy than to darker, grittier storytelling, and the dispositions of many of our writers reflects that. After all, we all know what Mystery Dungeon stories tend to be like and /sip/ has a good amount of conceptual overlap with PMD. Granted both have their darker elements, but there's a strong noblebright feel overall.
>>59455907This is why it works for Pokemon.Could you imagine if anthother franchise merge like Digimon or Palworld happened, those two would be much worse off for humans in our world.Digimon are literally world ending monsters.And Pals range from I am a cuddly kitty cat, to Xenos with beyond human intelligence with elemental powers.
Eh, I actually do like the realistic ramifications of monsters suddenly appearing even if it is a bit too "dark" for the tastes of some in this thread.Lucario's story of the spinarak and ariados was great and I want to see more about problems of that nature.
Which country would recognize the first official all-Pokémon wedding? My money is on either the USA or Japan.
>>59457434As in the bride and groom, or the full ceremony with the father of the bride, the best man, the officient, bridesmaids, guests, and anyone/everyone else?
>>59457440I was thinking just the bride and groom, but that would be another good milestone.
>>59457448>>59457440>>59457434>For the publicity stunt and sponsorship money, the couple made their wedding registry with a pet supply company>Whether they actually wear his and hers collars was never confirmed>Paparazzi photos have captured them wearing the paw booties during walks.
>>59456612I mean I've always said that /sip/ sits at the intersection of the mundane and the whimsical. I completely agree the stuff with the Ariados was great. Heck, I don't even consider that scene to be especially dark compared to, say, what's been happening to Layla in Copanon's story. A broadly optimistic feel doesn't preclude one's story from having darker elements, it just means you haven't set out to construct the story with cynicism baked into its very bone marrow like a lot of modern stories do. If anything, I think a fundamentally optimistic story exploring dark themes is actually more interesting than when a fundamentally cynical story does it.
>>59457978Sometimes whimsy is served with a side of working in a warehouse. On the plus side, you're nearly immune to heat stroke. On the downside, you are a fire hazard.
>be me in London>Wake up as honedge>Decide to go for nightly stroll on the streets>Take off scabbard to feel that night air on my metal skin>"Oi!">Uh oh, it's the bobbies>"Do yew have a loisence for that knoife?">I am this knoife>Don't know how to communicate in this body>Decide I don't want to rot in some evidence locker>Bonk bobby on the head with scabbard and flee>One week later I see the council has declared scabbards as deadly weapons to be confiscated
>>59459031kek>Nintendo coming in clutch for height deprived Pokemon turneesPic related
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ple-dSf75Ro>Mom dad mom dad>Guess what guess what guess what>I woke up like this and now I feel like running and jumping all the time and now I want breakfast and ooh I should go let my brothers know too ok bye
>>59459525The amount of fear this strikes in my heart is how I know I’m not ready to be a parent yet.
>>59459915No one's ever truly ready to be a parent, it's just something you do.
>Being the parents of two boys>One turns into a Riolu>The other turns into a Lucario>Both are a menace
>>59461395I really like the idea of two brothers turning into the same species. Someone should write a story centered around that.
>>59462132>>59461395Reminds me of the vibes the two Thyplosion have in the church-anon story. Them getting a spin-off story would be pretty fun.
LURKERS! Which Pokémon did you become?https://randompokemon.com/?n=1&natures=true&genders=true&uniqueTypes=true&abilities=trueIf you clicked on the link, you no longer have any excuse not to write!
>>59462447GOOD MORNING
>>59462447>Be Swablu>And boy do you find yourself busy outside a lot>You're happy to be around people, but you hate how filthy they are>Dirt, debris, and garbage everywhere>You used to be able just brush it off, but now it drives you nuts!>You've spent a lot of time cleaning up lately>...>Did that motherfucker just dump his trash on the side of the road?>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE—"In other news today, a New Delhi immigrant was sent to the hospital when a wild Pokemon attacked him with an unprovoked water attack..."
what’s the timespan for this setting? are there any stories 30+ years out from when people started turning?
>>59462502No definitive timespan, I took a shot at modeling the daily turn rate worldwide with a soft cap of 2% of the human population after ten years on a Logistics curve to figure out how long it would take before people realized it was slowing down, (six years, so for a while people would be worried that every single human might eventually turn) but if you want to project things out to the future, by all means, go for it.
>>59462502Not yet (the furthest ones so far are a couple of years out), but hey, if you wanna be the first go right ahead.
>>59462353Not a terrible idea. Maybe I will. I don't actually have plans for them yet. I was kind of hoping I would figure that out as I was writing.
If >>59444246 was less lewd and more “haha silly animal thinks it’s a person”, it would be a great thread for finding images to use here.
>>59463408Give it a few more days. If it's still running, it'll probably become an image dump and you'll find some more usable stuff.
>>59463817There's a few good candidates already
>>59463408Imagine how weird it would it be to be a Pokemon that has faux built in clothes attached to your body. Would it feel like clothing, or more feel like body hair?
>When you're so passionate about your day job, it's better than sleep
>>59465326>I told you guys I could do this job in my sleep!meanwhile outside the kitchen in the dining room>You mean to tell me a Snorlax fried this rice?>Yes sir.>Thank goodness. I didn’t like the implication I was eating a Snorlax. Please send my compliments to the chef!
>>59463817He looks like a chill guy, maybe a lifeguard? I really hope this isn’t some OC donut steel with a sick fetish
>>59437344This is very comfy. I love any story that just describes daily life.
Has anyone written a story about someone with a partner?>wake up>oh shit I'm a poke.wav>notice wife waking up, wriggle to get her attention>"Honey, would you still love me if I was a bug?"
>>59462447>chinchou>no choice but to completely overhaul my life>become the electrician of whatever underwater villages pop up
>>59466614I think we’ve had a couple one off stories, but nothing extended focusing on a married couple. The closest thing would be the Vaporeon living with his girlfriend. Personally, I’d love to have another couples story.
>>59466614My Wife is a Starfish.I believe that suits your criteria
>>59467007>>59466614That was the "0332" story. Available here: https://pastebin.com/WMdqhP8H
>>59467316Thanks!
Please be courteous to Pokémon you interact with. Remember they were once human just like you and deserve the same respect you would give your fellow man.Also, the courts have been historically lenient towards Pokémon who have accidentally hurt people attempting to harass, molest, or assault them.
>>59468414
>Hear rumor that a cheri berry tree was discovered>Get excited and hope apricorn trees appear soon so we can get pokeballs>Next day wake up as a pokemon>Suddenly live in fear that an apricorn tree will be discovered
>>59449050>>59449055>>59449058>>59449061I wish I had found this gif earlier.
>>59455498Really, really stellar writing throughout. I was constantly gripped with the emotions as I read through chapters 3 and 4.Chapter 4 felt a little bit rushed, but I'm glad you wrote that little climax before stopping. I would love to read more, however...
>When the regular-ass fox turns into a ruse fox
>You of all people, a K9 agent, not only had to get caught by this crazy thing, but end up as a werewolf beast?>FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK>Headbutting a hole in the drywall didn’t make you feel any better>You had lost some height too…>You weren’t even going to try to deal with anything right now>If you ever earned some self pity, this was the time>Crawl back into bed and leave the world to run itself for a while>Life may have fucked you up the ass without taking you to dinner first, but you weren’t getting out of bed until it made you breakfast>Texts? Who cares.>Phone call? Who could possibly have it worse than me right?>You can’t even unlock your phone with these blunt rocks attached to what used to be your hands>I’m a damn dog now, surely that’s the worst thing going on right now right?>…>…>You WERE supposed to be on duty today>Blast. No better doctor’s note than your ugly mug anyway.>It’s only a few blocks away. Man up and get it over with ya big baby.>You started staggering your way over to the precinct >You had bothered to put on your hat, and lanyard badge, but the rest of the uniform just wasn’t an option>That meant leaving your radio and phone at home.>You’d have to talk fast to keep your buddies from locking you up like a dog or something worse>You were pretty sure the official order was to defer until the feds got involved>Maybe you could get them to just go along with it?>No, you’d have to take what’s coming to you and act like you’d like it>Steeling your nerves, you badged through the officer rear entrance to the precinct and into the quiet unease that never meant anything good
>>59470888>Your own anxiety about this whole thing was thumping in your ears>The deserted hallways made everything all the worse>It was as if everyone was hiding and holding their breath just for your own torture>You finally made your way upstairs to the deputy chief’s office, almost feeling a sense of shame>A captain like you reduced to such a lowly state>All the office blinds were closed - all the better to hide the awful truth>Time to ruin the rest of your life>A quick knock on the door and you started your speech”Chief, it’s Captain Anon from the K9 squad. I am in an unfortunate situation and must approach it with the dignity befitting an off-“>>”Jiminy H Christ! Anon is that you? Thank god you’re here! Get out of the hallway quick!”>Not the welcome you were expecting>You were conspiratorially pulled inside and down to a huddled position under the Chief’s desk as you heard his radio blare out[ATTENTION ALL UNITS 10-91-Victor-Paul at Tanger Substation. Do not approach unless necessary. BE ADVISED 904 situation likely.]>>”Attention all channels! This is Chief Simmons. I am holed up in Tanger Substation with Captain Anon from K9. We are taking control of the situation. Strike team stand down! I repeat stand down.”[Copy Simmons. You’ve got 30 minutes unless we hear some progress.]>Shit.>SHIT!>That code meant an animal - vicious and Pokémon - was at your precinct!>Fire situation likely? What the hell was going on?
>>59470900>>”You’re one of those poke monsters now right? Looks like you’re a red attack dog man or something?””I-I don’t know for sure. Listen sir, I nee-“>>”No! You’re going to listen to me and listen good. Overnight one of your K9s must have turned. The thing looks more like a tiger than a dog anymore. It’s been running amok in the halls and burned three of our detectives trying to catch her. We are under lockdown unless you can re-tame that thing. We’re lucky you came when you did and I don’t know how you missed her coming up here. I don’t want to put her down, but SWAT is looking to take her out unless you can pull some magic on her. Do you hear me?”>Well, so much for that pity party you were planning on throwing for yourself
>>59470918Wow, definitely a bad day for a pity party if one of the K9s is a badly behaving Arcanine. Good luck, Mr. Anon.
>>59470918At least Officer Anon has a type advantage
>>59471237Only on the offensive, since rock doesn't resist fire.
>>59471245Are you sure about that?
>>59471535I thought I was, but it turns out I was wrong. Huh. Even people who follow this franchise can fuck things up with the type chart, apparently.
So which pokemon do I wake up as?
>>59471606https://randompokemon.com/Yielded Ariados for you.
>>59471623Uh oh...
>>59468414NoI will continue petting them no matter what
>>59471580lol it happensI used to have this Versus strategy guide as a kid that was just filled with blatant misinformation like how normal types supposedly don't get same type attack bonusesI believed that for the next 15 years and never used normal types because of it
It happened.My father who was suffering with Amyotorphic Lateral Sclerosis has passed after a heart attack. At the age of 56.He is currently in the ICU being kept alive by Machines in the vaguest sense of the word ALIVE.On one hand his suffering is over, on the other I will miss him.So yeah.
>>59471870I’m so sorry to hear that. Take all the time you need. We’re glad you’re here. If you ever want to talk, we’re always available.
>>59471870Well shit. Sorry to hear it, Digi. God be with you.
>>59471870I'm so sorry to hear that
>>59449061Well, it could be worse - Prof could be both over-thinking it AND half-assing it. At least he's only doing the former.>delaying the inevitableOh why stop now? :^)>Avoiding attentionPeople will think that you flying is awesome. You know that and I know that and you know that I know that you know that. >sometimes you just don’t want someone watching you when you’re still figuring things outYeaaah that would mess with the strict sense of routine your autistic mind craves.>having the mentality to do it was something elseYou are living proof of that, my friend. On the other hand, achieving flight without the slightest skerrick of Pokemon instinct to help you out will be an immense achievement. You are re-wiring your already unusual brain in a way few people have even conceptualized of yet.>was that a flight pun?Yes, but we'll forgive you. And also for the crouch-jumping thing.>Projectile motion was a common feature of pre-calculusLook at this way, if you jump hard enough you'll theoretically be able to orbit the entire planet!Jumping and faceplanting over and over again... FOR SCIENCE...! Boi is doing it to himself at this point.>looked like a music videoMaybe you should make it one.>feels best when you get the proper wing position and actually catch some liftI am shocked - SHOCKED! Well not that shocked. Yes, Prof, you ARE doing it. Excellent job. Well done. It's not like we couldn't've all told you that you could do it.Nah but in all seriousness, it can be frustrating watching Prof have to claw and struggle for every single tiny bit of progress, but it's very cathartic too when he finally does make progress. Looking forward to more.
>>59449086I'm still hoping for a revelatory moment the first time he manages to fly properly where he loses himself to the catharsis of it and lets his guard down (probably only for an instant, knowing him) just enough that the instincts we saw him aggressively shut out when he first turned unlock again and wind up carrying him figuratively and literally to new heights, allowing him to finally embrace his new self in a more complete and well-rounded way.>>59459031We can but shake our collective damn heads at the absolute state...>>59462480Quite a different complexion from... I think it was the Wooper in Bulbanon's story...? having a water attack that was little more effective than a water pistol.>>59465326Oooh, this'd be a fun one.>>59471870Ah shit. Well don't worry about us (although we're here if you need us as 1890 said). Take care of yourself and take as long as you need.
>>59471989I imagine his exercise session, if someone did view it from the outside, would be a cross between these two. https://youtube.com/watch?v=or3bzXvrZb8https://youtube.com/watch?v=0cAYtqXtqSE
>Wake up>ughh still to groggy to do anything>cold and disoriented>need warmth and to go back to sleep>toss and turn in bed, just rolling on your shoulders >oh right, your husband>he’s in bed with you >he wouldn’t mind>start snuggling up to him>hug his available arm tightly>do it again… and again… and huh?>feeling his warmth seep into you wakes you up further>you are staring up at his sleeping face, which looks bigger than usual somehow?>look down his arm and at yourself>purple and yellow?>must be dreaming just go back to sleep>feeling so much better now>hug him a little tighter just to show you love him>imagine if you could stay here forever, always holding him close>never ever let him goMEANWHILE>dreaming of liberating the free world from the alien occupation>XCOM never had a one man army like you>Patrolling a liberated sector with the hot chick you picked up>Something pounces on you from the shadows>Some kind of tiny Viper?>Your beautiful babe is worried, but you’re too calm cool and collected to let her see you nervous>”Look, it’s practically harmless! It’s not even attacking me, just coiling onto my arm! Maybe I’ll keep it as a pet?”>>”You were always such a caring person”>Keep walking around with the alien like a Megaman arm cannon
>>59437126I want to be Gardevoir or Ditto so I can be a horny trainers cuddle/fuck toy Is that so wrong What does it say about me chat that this is my priority in life
>>59472637>What does it say about me chat that this is my priority in lifeIt tells me you have a serious porn addiction and don't have enough interactions with real life friends without thinking about sex.
>>59472637It says you're a total degenerate who shouldn't even be allowed to own pets or even have freedom or autonomy in polite society.This thread isn't for fetishists like you.
>>59471890>>59471898>>59471903>>59472005It is finished. with his blood going hyperkalemic that was the tell tell signs of massive cellular decay and organ failure.In other words the decomposition had begun.We made the decision to end the use of the machines today.He's gone now.The tears were shed, now we begin the process of burial.Thanks for the well wishes friends.I have a lot to process now.
>>59473302I don’t want to sound bitter, but make sure to keep your guard up. There are a lot of people that try to scam people grieving and in emotional distress during the burial process.
>>59473302Again, take as much time as you need. But also feel free to swing by - lending our ears aside, perhaps the thread can serve as a bit of comfort here or there more generally.
>>59473302Caught up with the thread, just to see your mourning posts. I'm so sorry for your loss. Headaches be damned, I'm pouring a glass of my finest scotch for both of you right now.Rest in peace DigiGirl's dad, your child brought a lot of joy to many strangers on the internet. I'm sure he's proud of you.
>>59473679He was just happy I was there, and wanted me to know life was good to him.He saw both me and mom where so tired but always took time to take care of him as his motor functions deteriorated.He always said he was embarrassed at what we had to do, and he said he always felt like an infant being catered too.We just always said we loved him and made sure he had what he needed.He never knew I did small writing for internet strangers, he probably would have found it weird.But he liked my writing and said I should write shows for TV, he would definitely watch them.
>The good news is, you're apparently a "special attacker," whatever that means, so you're not too strong to keep boxing with humans>The bad news is it's really hard to get the helmet over your ears
>>59473786Your dad sounds like he was a good man, Digi. He definitely seems to have raised you well. My deepest condolences, sincerely.
>Only you, the viewer, are privileged to see the truth behind this PoV piece>The man who saw this humble fast food worker never realized he was ordering from a Zoroark>Of all the Pokemon, Zoroarks were always the most difficult turnees to identify
>On the bright side, you can sleep pretty much anywhere now
>>59475149>Anon has such a severe case of PIPS (or lack there of?) that they don’t even realize they’ve turned into a Pokemon>Wake up, throw some clothes on, and just head in to work to start wage-ing at their sucky fast food job>When they’re running on autopilot, their Zork instincts make them illusion themselves human>Very occasionally, when they make a positive human interaction and a connection to another person, their illusion drops for a moment>This is the Zoroark instinct interpreting their job as a dangerous circumstance and flashing their “true form” is a cry for help and to try and find more of their kind
>>59476396>Anon starts finding mysterious white/black and red/purple hairs across his home.>Gets convinced that there is a Zork living in his walls.
>The alarms wailed.>Lockdown? It aint even morning yet.>"Someone musta turned," my cellmate hopped down from the bunk.>Turning. That's every inmate's dream. Especially for those of us with long sentences. It's the only chance some of us have of ever getting out of this dump.>I peered out through the bars. There was some commotion. Inmates were relaying news to each other.>"Guards are saying it's Shanks! Turned into a ghost!">Damn, he hit the jackpot. Not like Jimmy the Rat who turned into his namesake but was still too fat to squeeze through the bars.>Whistles were blowing behind me. My cellmate was already peering out the narrow slit of a window.>"There he is!" my cellmate waved me over and made some room.>Floodlights lit the prison yard.>A small grey bag looking thing floated toward the fence. It had two white stripes in the shape of bones on its back.>"He's just making a beeline for it.">"Hah! Shanks has been in solitary for the past two weeks. He don't know about the new guard out there!">"He's a ghost, right? How's that thing gonna stop him?">Shanks turned around. He had a skull for a face with one red eye. It sent chills down my spine.>The ghost bounced as if he was laughing. Looked like he was taunting us, that bastard.>Inmates in nearby cells were whooping and hollering as the unlucky chumps on the other side of the cell block were stuck asking what we saw.
>>59477104>Shanks turned around right as a cloud of dust burst out of the ground and enveloped him.>The whooping turned into an uproar.>Guards banged their nightsticks on the bars to try to quiet the unruly lot.>The dust settled.>A red crocodile with black stripes held the escaped murderer in his jaws.>Shanks squirmed between the croc's teeth. His red eye darted between sockets.>The croc tightened his grip until the skull ghost was completely immobilized.>Human guards escorted the croc and his prey back toward the prison.>That's the end of our monthly entertainment.>"Serves him right. Idiot should have flown up, not out!">"Hey, how are they gonna keep him locked up?">"How should I know?">This will be the topic of debate until the next inmate turns and attempts to escape.
>>59476862>Guys, I think a Zoroark is living in my house, how can I tell?>No, I only see myself on my security cameras.>I keep finding red and black hair! There must be one! There’s claw marks on my floor, and even tearing up my sheets and towels!
>>59477107>>59477104We’ve had a few police officers in the thread, about time the criminal element got some showtime, even if it never pays. I can’t believe a rat was unable to escape>Double check Raticate size because Dark type lol>2’ 4”I can believe a Raticate was unable to escape
>>59477107Would-be jail breaker snagged by a Krookodile. Poetic.
>>59477338My dumbass thought it was supposed to be a Skeledirge. That makes so much more sense.
It would really suck to turn into some species of pokemon and then some asshole turns into the same species you are and becomes a wanted criminal
>>59470888>K9>canineHahaha I gets it
>>59477603K9 units are a real thing, pun and all.
>>59470918Was NOT expecting Lycanon to get a follow-up. Dis gun' be fun~The incredible grouchiness and grumpiness of this man makes for a refreshing contrast to most of our other protagonists. He and Mukanon both stand on the schlub spectrum, but at very different points along it. And yet, for all his espousing of the "life sucks and then you die" philosophy, he retains enough of a sense of duty to resign himself to show up to his K9 unit as a dog anyway. I don't buy for a second that he couldn't've figured out how to unlock his phone with Lycanroc hands if he'd really wanted to keep throwing his pity party, so it suggests something positive remains in his outwardly wretched, miserable spirit. I like it.Mate, I'm pretty sure anyone with two functioning brain cells can figure out that a Pokemon wouldn't wear a policeman's hat and lanyard without good reason. Your determination to play by the rules even when it hurts is commendable, though. Come to think of it, I don't think we've actually gotten to see a transformee get processed by the Feds early on into the phenomenon in any of the other stories, have we? Could be interesting.>almost feeling a sense of shameMan, this guy's gonna have a ROUGH time trying to forge a healthy relationship with his new Pokemon self...>Thank god you’re here!>Not the welcome you were expectingThis is a really funny way to break the tension of Lycanon's soul-crushing dread, when reality ensues in completely the opposite direction from what one would expect. Pretty great.Haha! Oh my, that feel when you haplessly schlub-wander your way into a life-or-death situation, huh Lycanon? Seems the world sees fit to counter your attempt at being depressed by throwing you in at the deep end and telling you to swim. You do resist fire, but you're also a glass cannon 'mon, so definitely some push and pull there. You also haven't had a chance to practice any moves or abilities yet. This is gonna be very, VERY interesting...
>>59470918
>>59479366yes master…must annex the Sudetenland…
>>59472608Gay?I hope
>>59477436>criminal cherrim on the loose>obviously all the wanted posters show sun forme>nobody realizes our bodies morphe with sunlight>forced to stay in the dark like a vampire to avoid suspicion>I am the night
>>59479641Not what I had in mind, but I suppose I can’t keep you from reading into it what you like.
Being transformed into a pokemon years after the novelty has worn off for society, but that doesn't mean you can handle the trauma any better.
>>59480131Yeah there's probably this horrible spot in time where pokemon transformations are still too new for there to be all the accommodations that you need but also too late for you to really capitalize on your new form>Ah man, this is sandslash body is inconvenient but at least I can get one of those high paying tunneling jobs that make use of my unique skills!>later>"What do you mean you already hired a team of onix and diglett? Aw man..."
>>59480173>Turn into electric type years after the event started>Other older electric types love to talk about the "golden age" when city power infrastructure didn't have any preventative measures stopping your kind from siphoning energy
>>59480177antiviruses have advanced far enough to stop porygons from accessing restricted data easily
>>59480184How the fuck would being turned into a Porygon even work?A Spiritomb? A Claydol?
>>59480188I guess it's up to some creative writer who wants to write a story about it
>>59480188Spiritombs form when the 109 souls threshold is crossed. If it only leans on the condemned, then actuarial table data says that it should only take a matter of weeks using only individuals with life sentences to reach that number.
>>59480191I know just the guy.:)
>>59480216Is it you?
>>59476396>>59477126>Anon search for more information about Zoroarks>It seems like his mysterious invader doesn’t steal anything from him, not even food>When he leaves notes out, it doesn’t respond>As if they’re just a ghost >He eventually finds a “Zoroark Anonymous” therapy group>Goes as an outsider to ask questions about what they do and how their illusions work>His own unknown Zoroark instincts immediately perk up at being near others like him and drops his illusion>Anon continues to not notice this as he is so intently focused on everyone else>All of the members of the group are surprisingly jovial and welcoming of their guest>They listen to him, encourage him, and are supportive of his problem>In unspoken agreement, the other members don’t try to break his delusion in case it causes a mental breakdown>As anon sits in the meeting and listens, he feels as if a burden he didn’t know he was carrying was lifted>At one point he nearly starts crying for reasons he doesn’t understand, only a vague sense of “relief”Do you believe in the power of 『GRAVITY』? For some reason we can't explain, Pokémon are unknowingly drawn to each other, even when they're total strangers.
>>59476792Come to think of it, even if you turned into a humanoid pokemon, you'd almost certainly have to buy a whole new wardrobe to accommodate your new size and having a tail and whatnot. It'd be worth it to me, though. It'd feel too weird to not wear clothes.
>>59481254Assuming no genitals or magically vanishing genitals, I don't think I'd feel too weird about it. If anything, most mons already have some kind of "clothing" in-design. I'd feel weird wearing shorts as a cinderace.
>>59481254You're not going to have much luck in the early days of turning unless you know a good tailor
>>59481877You also have to consider the economic factors of producing products that will only really be suitable for one species of pokemon.How many human-turned-cacturne need to exist before it's economically viable to produce products for them?
>>59481950I think the cottage industry is going to be the biggest spot for growth in terms of boutique Pokémon clothing and everyday ergonomic solutions.
>>59482349>Your boy loves Pokemon Unite>You're pretty sure he's autistic, but you indulge him in his hobbies regardless>You're not gonna be one of those assholes who smacks his boys around for being interested in things>Fuck you, grampa!>...ahem>Anyway, long story short, he's an Umbreon now, and he's been begging me for an Umbreon Ninja outfit ever since>So, do you think you can help a guy out?>"I'm glad you're supportive of your son's hobbies, sir, but we'll only do bespoke work at $50 an hour.">Dammit.
>>59483146>Oh look! They sell one pretty close to what I’m looking for on t*mu>I don’t remember umbreons having two tails, but for $1.37 it’s worth buying three and hoping to get lucky>One never shows up>One is two sizes too small>The one that does arrive in the right size feels like roofing felt and smells like formaldehyde>Fine, I’ll buy from a reputable retailer!>You now have two formaldehyde ninja suitsFuck this gay earth
>>59483481Formaldehyde is a legal fabric softener in the production of garments, which is why it festers in the low cost sweat shops.
>>59483489That doesn’t mean I feel safe putting it on my children’s skin, even if they now have fur covering.
>>59483522As well you shouldn't, formaldehyde is a carcinogen.
STOP FALLING ASLEEP ON PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION
>Changes your species>Doesn't fix your near-sightedness
>>59485423>notable celebrity turned into a Pokémon >starts a fashion trend of wearing glasses after being transformed>during a red carpet interview:>”it helps to remind myself and others around me that I am still a person and have thoughts and feelings just like everyone else and that I need to love myself for who I am”>she doesn’t even need them, and didn’t wear glasses before>trend catches on and becomes a shorthand symbol for a person turned, not a feral animal>this makes a very specific group of transformation art fans very upset
>>59470918“Yessir! Where was she last seen?”>You attempted a salute and to straighten up despite feeling like you had a boulder attached to your forehead>>”Good man. She melted through the chain link fence in their kennels and then started running through the halls. I haven’t heard her upstairs yet. From the reports I heard, she ripped the catch pole right out of the hands of the handlers on duty. No word on the status of the other dogs. Call for help if you need me, but I don’t know how much I can do”>With a silent step through the door, you were back in the hall and exposed.>What the hell were you supposed to do to tame a fire tiger?>Your only hope was that some of her training would kick back in once you calmed her down>Hopefully she wasn’t feral now, but just in a “play” mood because she wasn’t “on-duty”>After slowly plodding down the stairs to the main floor, you perked your ears as best you could to try and listen for any hints where she was>First things first, figure out who you’re dealing with>Making your way to the kennels quietly was a slow task, but you weren’t ready to face anything yet>No need to open the door, there was already a person sized hole where the K9 had busted through>Inspecting the empty kennel and yep, this was, and hopefully still is, Cookie>Doesn’t look like she melted the chain link or anything like that>Seems more like she just made a break for it and bowled the staff over*AWWOOOOWOOOWOOWOOBARKBARKBARKBARKRUFFRUFFRUFF*>Dang!>All of the other dogs in the kennels around the corner started barking, having sensed your presence
>>59486443>Cover blown, you bolt over and try to get a good sense of their wellbeing>No burns on anyone, and they even still had food and water“SHHHH-CHT!”>You tried your old silence command on the remaining dogs, a typical shush with a hard emphasis on the end to display dominance*grrrrrrr…*>Thank god, they still recognized you somehow!>Maybe there was hope for Cookie then>You’ll need to pick your battleground with her carefully>Meaning you do NOT to get cornered in here>You booked it for the wider general hallways and pressed yourself into an alcove behind a pillar near the on-duty cop’s lockers>You were at the end of a long hall and could strain your ears in the two directions>The click of nails on tile was unmistakable>The tempo was faster than anything you had heard in all your years of training with dogs>Some part of you had been wondering if you were being too dramatic about losing your height>Now, you were certain you weren’t>There she was, taller than you, even if you were still human>Panting heavily>Literal flames whisping out the sides of her muzzle>You could feel the radiant heat from across the room>Suddenly, her jaw snapped shut>Ears perked up>Eyes locked on you>Son of a bitch
>>59486449>She’s bounding right toward you>DO NOT RUN>Running means you’re weaker, that you’re prey>Stand your ground, assert dominance>YOU are the pack leader, YOU are in charge>YOU find yourself running towards the giant Arcanine>What do you do? Throwing a punch or slashing at her face isn’t going to do much?>The distance is closing faster than you thought possible>Orange paws bounding at you, flames licking all around>Instinct takes over>Sliding like a baseball player, you duck down under and between the dog’s legs>Your claws dig in, scratching into the tile as you straighten up under her belly>Use the momentum>YOU ARE THE ALPHA>With a headbutt and muscles surging in your arms, you shove the Arcanine as hard as you can>Up and over>Completely caught off balance, she’s launched head over tail and flipped into the lockers>She hits them with a crash, metal ringing out as it dents inward>DON’T LET UP>You run back towards her while she’s stunned upside down >ASSERT DOMINANCE>You open your own muzzle and go to bite her’s like disciplining a pup
>>59486455>Wait wait wait why?>You catch yourself and grab her muzzle with your paw instead>She bares her teeth and licks them in a show of submission>good>You hold it for a minute as the adrenaline leaves your veins>Deep breaths>A good officer doesn’t let emotions run them>You notice Cookie’s tail wagging>You release her muzzle and go over to give her a big belly rub>There’s that puppy-like dopey face of hers>You let her get up and return to seated position“Paw.”>She gives you her paw without issue“Down.”>She immediately lies down on her belly“Over.”>She rolls over and back onto her belly“Stay.”>You walk backwards towards the stairwell while keeping an eye on her>She doesn’t move and keeps her eyes trained on you>You go around the corner before immediately popping your head back around to check if she’s still there>Her tail starts wagging the second she sees you again, but she hasn’t moved from the position“Stay.”>You walk around to the stairwell and shout up it“CHIEF! I got Cookie under control! It’s safe to come down! Do we have any of those weighted vests for the mental health calls?”>The figure of you superior officer appears at the top of the stairs>>”Anon you red furry magnificent bastard!”
>>59486459The intersection of pack leadership instincts and actual human training methods is interesting.
>>59478549I’m glad you enjoyed this part and hope you like the addition! I want to add some kind of closing to this chapter, but I’m not sure how much detail to go into, or to jump ahead to the “new normal”.Not being able to unlock the phone is definitely just cope and inventing an excuse to not bother checking messages.That’s a good point about the feds and this story might be a good way to explore it in a way few others have.Sometimes you just have to put your big boy pants on and get to work.
>>59486013I can imagine human turnees wearing human clothing items, like a hat, scarf, bandana, a bag, or similar, to signal their humanness, even if they can't wear clothes.
>>59477107Krookodile prison guard exploding out of the ground is awesome and would make a BIG impression on the yard. They might even start to take on a mythical quality given how superstitious convicts tend to be.>>59481066Aww. Delusional Zoroanon is a sweetheart and deserves nothing but good things. Would love to see anons continue this and turn it into a long-running collaborative piece.>>59483481Capitalism, HO!>>59486013>>59486935I've always said that clothing accessories are one of the best ways to differentiate your Pokemon OC from a generic member of their species. For turnees it's no different. I could imagine jewelry becoming popular too.
>>59487638As the OP of the Delusional Zork piece, I’d love some ideas from others on what to do with him. The idea of him thinking there’s a Zoroark breaking into his house was really good.
>>59488531>Delusional Zork tries to recruit other pokemon turnees to try and help him catch that sneaky zoroark>He sets up traps in his home and constantly gets himself caught in them>He tries to get in the mindset of his "enemy" so he can think one step ahead of him
Schizoroark sounds like a fun character
>Group of aquatic turnees decide to go off the grid and form their own city deep in the ocean>Things go fine until a sharpedo decides to finally give in to his instincts
>You woke up, and all you could see was yellow.>You swung your head right, then left, then right again.>"What the fuck" you thought to yourself.>Between the shakes, you saw glimpses of reality.>Something was attached to your face.>A Post-it note, to be exact.>There was only one person who could have done it.>Finally, you managed to pry it off your face.>"There are some Snorlaxes causing delays in the transit system. Don't worry if I didn't come back at the usual time. I also took the liberty to waterproof your setup while you were asleep." She wrote on the slightly damp piece of yellow paper.>She waterproofed your setup?>You instinctively stretched your back as if you were a cat and jumped off the bed.>Well, day two of your new cursed existence officially began now.>You looked at the clock.>It was too late for a normal person.>Good (or maybe bad) thing that your fucked-up sleep schedule survived the change of species.>Always one more thing to keep you from going insane.>But back to the subject.>Your waterproofed setup.>A quick strut across the rooms, and you saw it.>The mouse, keyboard, and monitor were placed on the floor, while your PC and speakers were put on the desk.>An inversion of how a normal desktop setup would look, but it did look functional enough for your current form.>Once you got closer, you noticed that both the mouse and keyboard were placed in plastic bags.>The PC was also turned on.>You took a look down at the keyboard, finding another note.>"I didn't know how to waterproof your computer without destroying the ventilation, so I placed it higher and left it on for you.">You moved the mouse, and the monitor sprang to life.>With one difference.>It had a different wallpaper.>Because it was a sleeping Vaporeon.>It was you.>She took a photo of you and set it as the wallpaper.>You looked stupid.>Lying on your back without a care in the world and a belly inviting everyone to pat it.
>>59489981Sorry dude, you are verifiably “cute” now. It’s literally in your body’s design to be like an idealized pet. You’re going to have to learn to deal with it.The waterproofing was an excellent idea. Smart to remember the ventilation, a fair number of people would have forgotten that.
>>59488531>He thinks everyone confused with his Zork obsession is in on the conspiracy
>>59491153>>59488948>Why is it that all you people talk about anymore is Zoroarks?!>I know I’ve got a little infestation problem, but it’s like a ghost following me everywhere!>I just need some help getting it to leave me alone, and life can go back to normal>Don’t look at me like that! I see you backing away from me like I’m crazy!>I know I’m not crazy! I AM NO-OOF!>Owww… tripped and bit my tongue…>No guys, wait! Come back! Don’t go!>…>please…>don’t leave me alone…
>>59491975Aw. I was hoping for funny, but now it's lonely and sad.
>>59486459>>59489981Both fun reads. Thanks for writing! Keep up the good work.>>59488531Subconscious Zoroark illusions kick in here or there.>Gonna put a frozen pizza in the oven.>There's a pizza already in the oven...>And it's the kind he actually wanted, not the cheapo one he pulled out.
>>59492062>LISTEN UP LADIES!>Oh, uh sorry Miss Ribombee>We are on a Zoroark hunt!>I’ve recruited each of you for your special skills, unique talents, and above all, trustworthiness!>This wily Zoroark has been outsmarting each and every one of my traps for him since he first made his presence known!>What?>Yes, I know it must be a he>He keeps using up my favorite all-in-one body wash but leaves the girly shampoo and conditioners alone>Anyway…>If we are to succeed, we must think like them, act like them, and eat sleep and breathe like them!>As such, I have prepared a spread of each of your favorite foods and drinks as my way of saying thank you>Yes, Lieutenant Lucario?>You detect something?>Then we must follow it! Lead the way!And that was how Anon accidentally invited a group of new Pokemon friends over for a night of food, fun, and games
>>59492207
>>59492167I can interpret this in two ways. Is he tricking himself to make him feel better, or is he tricking himself into treating himself better than he would normally?A:>Anon is upset with the poor quality of his food>The Zork instincts make an illusion that it’s better than it is to try to cheer him upB:>Anon only buys the cheap stuff because he can’t afford or doesn’t believe he needs or deserves the nicer stuff>Zork illusions trick him and the store into buying the nicer stuff thinking it’s the cheap stuffOr am I misreading this and it’s something else?
>>59493115Works both ways.
>>59494397>Anon returns to his job at McDonalds.>Meets a nice girl.>She flashes her true Hisuian Zoroark form before apologizing and taking her food.
>>59494422>Hey.>>Uh, hey.>Do you, uh, want to hang out later?>>Sure…
>>59494422I don't want to sound regional-formist or whatever but you've really got to be careful around those H zorks.
>>59494904Oh come on now, just because one Fed got PIPS doesn't mean... lol just kidding, H. Zorks are dangerous as fuck.
>>59494904>>59495701>>59496198You just need to get to know them better.
A second Quaquaval dream has hit the hippocampus.>be (You) in a dream>in your first person view>sitting in a crowded waiting room against the back wall>waiting for what you can assume is a doctor’s appointment of some kind>television sign displaying the wait list but it’s unreadable due to dream physics>pull out your phone, but there’s nothing for you to do with it, so you just hold it in your hand>bored>start idly drumming your fingers on the back of your phone>perspective shifts out of your own body to the left like in a dramatic movie camera shot to a third person view>(You) are still you, in the seat to the right, but (You) are now aware of the person sitting to your left despite the fact you haven’t looked at them or seen them>it is a Quaquaval>they were here before you and, despite everyone else sitting with an empty chair between them you unknowingly took the chair right beside him>they are sitting in the same exact position as you but without the cell phone in hand, instead supporting their head with the free hand>you are both crossing your legs with the right ankle on your left knee and leaning your right elbow on the armrest>he’s clearly bored as well>he is instead tapping the side of his beak with one of his feathery fingers>the tapping pattern he was using had a clear rhythm compared to your idle action1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4(you may know it as Aquarela do Brasil, or the office theme from Brazil (1985), if you don’t know it, hum the Coconut Mall theme and that’s close enough)>as if trying to stop a bad habit, he suddenly stops himself and lays his hand on his shin>after sitting still for a moment, he now starts tapping with his whole hand1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4>with a jerking motion, he pulls his hand up to his chest and curls the fingers into a fist>this keeps him calm for another moment
>>594970351 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4>he has now started idly knocking on his chest>getting flustered, he readjusts himself and sits on his own hands>in doing so, his arm feathers brush up against your shoulder making you more aware of him>this helps him keep peace for a while>you hear the ticking of the clock on the wall>someone else in the waiting room blows their nose1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4>his foot on his knee is now bouncing up and down to the rhythm>you can hear the swishing as his feathers rub against each other>the patient sitting across the aisle looks up from their own phone and stares at you>it isn’t you making the noise!>you look to your left at the impossibly blue peacock duck sitting next to you>he notices this and turns to look at you quizzically>only then, he notices his foot bouncing>he suddenly freezes in a moment of self awareness>standing up, he brushes himself down like a gentleman, and sits back down>now he is sitting rigidly straight, with his hands folded and in his lap>the feathers coming out of the side of his arms continue to brush against you>all returns to calm>someone else in the room is finally called>they leave through the door to the examination rooms1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4>in the Quaquaval’s folded hands their thumb is now rhythmically tapping the back of their other hand>you scoot over to the right so his feathers stop bumping against you>this makes him stop for a second1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4>but then he starts shoulder shimmying back and forth like in the game animation>you let out a quiet sigh as you look in his direction, but politely not directly at him>by now he has adding head bobs left and right1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4
>>59497040>the rhythm is incredibly clear for there being literally no music>another person in the waiting room clears their throat, obviously in a display of annoyance>strangely, they’re staring at you but glance over to the bird sitting next to you and back at you>it’s like they’re implying you should do something about them>what do you want me to do about it? It’s him doing it!?>your name is finally called and you stand up to go to the door>as you do so, you look back into the waiting room>the Quaquaval is now obviously dancing in his seat, bouncing up and down, smiling, and grooving with his eyes closed without a care in the world1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4 / 1 2 3_ / 1 2 + + 4>you leave him be and continue down the hall to the examination room>try to make awkward small talk with the nurse guiding you back>”Kinda weird out there in waiting room huh? How about that Pokemon?”>>”We don’t treat Pokemon at this clinic”>wake up from the dream
>>59497042>Born to dance>Made to sit patientlyThat guy's gonna be in a special hell any time he's made to sit down and be quiet.
You know, I've been trying to think of some really inconvenient scenarios to transform in, and the worst possible Pokemon to transform into. Slugma and Magcargo are pretty bad, so... Magcargo on the ISS would probably rank up there with worst possible transformation to happen. Another bad one would be a pilot turning into a very large Pokemon on a commercial airliner, since that'd inevitably destroy the controls of the aircraft and doom everyone aboard if they're mid-air. I would honestly vote for the latter being worse, if only because people will have time to realize what's happening and at no point can anything be done to stop it(assuming there's not like... any psychic types in the area or anything that could potentially save the aircraft.)
>>59497488Random passengers turning into an Onix would be incredibly inconvenient on a long-haul flight, but if someone's awake and nobody turns if someone else can see it... just don't be in the back row and nod off, I guess.
>>59497495Pilots are the most suspectible. Microsleep is a massive problem, and there's only two on domestic flights so one of them can be in the bathroom while the other is flying.PIPS Zangoose and Serviper would be incredibly unlikely and not quite as dangerous, but the combo of both pilots turning into Pokemon with the one with hands becoming feral and hating the only other pilot, and said other pilot not being able to use flaps, throttle and rudder for landing would ALSO be incredibly inconvenient.Slugma and Magma are just... essentially flaming goo, and if you're unlucky, will immediately superheat an enclosed space. Spacecraft are especially bad because there will be no recovery of the bodies and you don't have gravity to ground yourself, even if you manage to not melt through the aluminum exterior.
>>59486459I like how the chief is just totally unphased by the fact that one of his men is a rock werewolf now. I guess being trapped in a building with an enormous, flaming tigerdog has a way of rapidly changing your perspective...I hate to be morbid, but I feel like if she wasn't in play mode, the building would most likely be on fire...I'm just imagining a comical, perfectly Arcanine-shaped hole like in the cartoons...Heh, the doggos can still detect the stench of grouch on you, mate... And hey, you've even got your own personal Cookie monster...Arcanine is fast as _fuq,_ boy!>DO NOT RUNWise man>running towardsProbably Naruto running, let's be honest.Human or Pokemon, sliding tackles continue to be undefeated.>YOU ARE THE ALPHAYOU HAVE THE CONN... oh wait, no, that's something else...When you don't know any moves, just utilize your newfound super strength to improvise Circle Throw, a move your species doesn't even learn. This guy's ability to think on his feet and react quickly and appropriately nicely demonstrates why he's valued on the force, despite his sour attitude.Heheh, the Lycanroc instincts colliding with human training strategy is sure to make life interesting for Lycanon moving forward, as someone else said. Still a better synergy than most people get to have right out of the gateLove Cookie being totally unphased by being hurled into a wall. Valuable resilience for if you ever manage to get her back into the field again.>A good officer doesn't let emotions run them.Based and rare.N'aww, the biggest floof! It'll be fun writing this report, though: "All I had to do was hurl her into a wall and she was as happy as a clam!"Just starring at the ceiling completely blissful after getting your pack leader's approval and there's nothing else in the world. Sometimes it's hard to fault Ben's temptation...>weighted vestMakes a lot of sense given the speed, strength, and energy of an Arcanine compared to a real dog.
>>59497580Heh, I wonder if Lycanon's co-workers will annoy the shit out of him by calling him "Red Furry" from now on. Be very intersting to see what his mental state will do and what his co-workers will do once the crisis is fully resolved and the adrenaline finishes fading.>>59489981>all you could see was yellowOH GOD, NO->A post-it noteWait, nevermind, we're good.>SnorlaxesLet's hope the military around here is as helpful as it was in Lucarioanon's town.>fucked-up sleep scheduleWell you ARE part cat now, so probably little hope of fixing that any time soon.The girlfriend is entirely too proactive, forward-thinking, and helpful. Let's hope she doesn't horrifically burn out like Eti's ex-GF did...Yeaaah, agreed that your cuteness is a part of you now and you're gonna have to learn to embrace it. We know that Vaporeon doesn't HAVE to sop water everywhere at all times, so learning to control that would probably be a useful first step.>59491975>>59492207The bad ending and the good ending. I definitely wanna see more of this running shitpost style - all these random little tangents and vignettes of Zoroanon are really great - but man, this gonna be a FUN one to try and collate into a rentry...>59494789>>59495701A perfectly chill H.Zoro (maybe their hatred for life manifest more as a Daria-like apathy rather than the boiling, murderous rage our existing H.Zoro has been experiencing?) WOULD make for an interesting contrast from Layla though.
>>59497495>if someone's awake and nobody turns if someone else can see itWhat if someone can turn if it means the other one who can see them dies or passes out before they can register what the hell they're witnessing?
>>59497502>microsleepFun topic for theses threads!>almost 1 in the morning>you have to wake up at 5 for work tomorrow (later today)>still doom scrolling like usual>micro sleep for half a second>phone falls and hits your face because you lost your thumbs in that split second
>>59497580>Naruto runningRealistically, I don’t know how else he could run, the paws and stone on his head are just so gangly.>Pokemon instincts and human training>>59486677You read quotes from dog trainers like Cesar Millan and they always talk about handling dogs in a pack. It’s important to remember they’re animals, not people. Imagine how that methodology gets messed up in your mind if you are suddenly a dog-like-thing yourself.I was definitely trying to evoke those “dog caught on something but still having a good time” images.>red furryAt the same time, would you want to mess with a coworker with resting psycho eyes?
>>59498326I'm not positive but I THINK Lycanroc Midnight is meant to run on all-fours. The arms are long enough to reach the ground still, and they're clearly adapted legs.
>>59449050>>59449055>>59449058>>59449061Are you SURE this is helping you learn to fly?>>59471989>>looked like a music video>Maybe you should make it one.Something like parts of this?https://youtube.com/watch?v=tkOr12AQpnU
>>59499406>Bizarre Love TriangleImagine being in a relationship and one day you wake up as a Pokémon. That’s already hard enough. Now imagine that you find another Pokémon of the same species and you develop an attraction to them as a result of PIPS.Anyone have a good idea for what species of Pokemon to use?
>>59499770A pair of Grovyles, so the anatomical differences aren't too big to make "we can make it work" seem unreasonable, but not human enough to pretend anything is the same.
>Dad made you ride with the dog after you turned
>>59500629>family dog was a ZoruaThings were going to get weird eventually anyway.
>>59500846Spectacularly so.
