explain, without mentioning fans, why this game makes you seethe
>>12608381it could be a little repetitive even if the levels changed a bit
I find the camera a bit primitive because it tends to get caught on things and not have the range of mobility I am used to in modern games (DS does this a bit better but has its own issues). I also don't like how jumping in water deeper than a puddle refills your health because they didn't separate health and oxygen. I do like the game on both N64 and DS though. Would not mind a modern remake that fixes the above and perhaps adds new stages (no hats)
>>12608381>the fans of this game make me seethe, but please don't talk about thisWhy not?Have a seat, OP.
>>12608381the camera and stupid u-turns make me seethe quite a bit
>>12608381the building of speed for 12 hours and calculating the geometry of quantum parallel universes seemed a bit too clunky
Just a reminder that 3D games are a bigger IQ check than tank controls will ever be. You need to have some level of object permanence and spatial mapping to play 3D games, which is too demanding for most people here. There's people here that think the polygon characters on JPEG backgrounds in PS1 games are too confusing and overwhelming for fuck's sake.
>>12608381Maybe I don't come around here enough, but why in the world would Mario 64 ever make me seethe? It's a wonderful game. My biggest complaint though is that it's not as fun to replay as an adult, since I know the game like the back of my hand, so it just feels like going through the motions whenever I try to replay it. Because it's definitely on the easier side, the joy of discovery and exploration did a lot of heavy lifting for my enjoyment as a kid, but you can't really tap into that if you remember literally everything about it.
>>12608761A disproportionate number of people bitch about limitations in technology and design while larping to enjoy retro games. If we were talking about cars, they'd complain the Model T is too slow. The complaints are never about things like theme or setting, its always about their fragile gameplay or design sensibilities being offended.
>>12608557Shut your mouth
It's simply inferior in every way to Chakan.
>>12608965>global timeryeah nah
>>12608381controls are too hard to figure out
>>12608381It's too easy. I get that's by design because they didn't want to make the worlds too big and confusing because it was one of the first of it's kind but most stars take like 30-60 seconds at most to get.
>>12609078kek
>>12608381I'm honored you used my bait template
>>12609097i've got multiple threads planned across multiple boards for the coming weeks. it's my template now.
>>12608412>but please don't talk about thiscorrect, it's off-topic and has nothing to do with the game. go to /v/ if you want to do that.
>>12608381it makes me seethe that they didnt make a proper sequel
Unfortunately the fans are part of the equation for why I dislike the game as much as I do. The game objectively just isn't anywhere near as good as people make it out to be. Mario's movement is stiff and heavy, there aren't very many unique objectives tied to the stars, several of the levels are incredibly boring and tedious, and while I hate using the term janky as a catch all the game really just is atrociously janky at times with stuff like bumping into invisible walls, Mario spazzing out on ledges, etc. There's definitely plenty to praise the game for, it really was the first of its kind and set the standard for the genre and even though I dislike how the game feels these days there's no doubt that when it released it was easily the best controlling 3D game period. But instead of admitting the game has some problems it's fans will unreasonably continue to say that it's still the best 3D platformer ever made and that it's perfect and I just couldn't disagree more. I wholeheartedly believe that most other 3D platformers that came after it are a hundred times better, even just the ones on the same console. I'm not even trying to be funny I think Earthworm Jim 3D is more fun, varied and creative than Mario 64.The other thing that really makes me hate the game more than I would otherwise is how the game can seemingly only be discussed if it's about the speedrunning aspect of it. God it's just obnoxious. Every single video about the game on Youtube is about the speed runs, even videos where it shouldn't even be a factor like in a review. It's almost a collective silent admission that the game itself isn't actually worth talking about. I also believe the speedrunners are why people seem to be so quick to defend the game's shortcomings and say outrageous shit like it's the best controlling 3D game ever, they see faggots that have been playing the game over and over for decades play it perfectly and they just think that's how the game is.
>>12609115i'll be sure to check the archives. lel.
>>12608965Based.
it's simple. 64 has a very enjoyable athletic moveset that is conducive to player skill expression and the large majority of platformers that followed either neglected this aspect completely or didn't really measure up. it wasn't until the 10s and the likes of hat in time did you see platformers really start to fulfill this want.
>>12609163>>12609123
>>12608381It had two levels too many. HMC and THI didn’t need to exist. 100 stars was plenty and the extra space would have been enough for real NG+ content or an actual song for TTC and RR. And Peach’s Secret Slide.
>>12608381The camera is complete ass and half the stars are impossible to find without a guide
the u-turns are a big no-no for me
>>12608381I seethe with pleasure as I play it because it is very fun.
>>12609262Honestly, do you need a guide for Mario 64??? It took me a week to get all 120 stars; I was 13 at the time. And as for the camera, I know why it's a problem for some people. It's because it's not constantly glued to Mario's back. And because of that, you can't grasp the 3D. Sorry to break it to you, but you have a vision problem or are cross-eyed. And 30 years later, nobody knows you can lock the camera. When you're in a level, press Start, and then you'll have the choice "Lakitu - Mario". Choose Mario, and when a section seems difficult, position the camera wherever you want (behind Mario, I imagine), then hold down R. The camera will stay fixed in mid-air.
>>12609303>Sorry to break it to you, but you have a vision problem or are cross-eyed.regular tvs don't have a 3d depth feature.
>>12609229I say Jolly Rodger Bay/Dire Dire Docks and Cool Cool Mountain/Snowman's Land are the easiest levels to cull or combine
>>12608381it doesn't
>>12608381While M64 wasn't he first game to do it (it was Yoshi's Island), it was the game that solidified the slop formula that will dominate Nintendo games and influence other studios. Instead of tight, challenging levels, M64 treats the player as a baby in a ballpen by dropping you on the same level over and over again and giving you slightly different objectives to accomplish for a headpat. Mechanically, the game plays like dogshit, its clunky, overstuffed, and frustrating. Personally, I also think its ugly as fuck. Some early 3D games like OOT or Goldeneye still retain their charm, M64 looks like a schizoid nightmare.
>>12609262>stars are impossible to find without a guideOne of the stupidest stars is grabbing the rabbit a second time. At the very least they could have put the rabbit in a different area instead of having to catch him in the same room twice.
>>12608381I played it for the first time in my mid20s a few years ago so there's no nostalgia involved herethe game rocks pretty hard. I can't think of a better 3d platformer off the top of my head. The base movement carries it that hard.
>>12609419You have a point about Mario 64, though I would argue it is still a soulful classic, but I will not stand for this Yoshi's Island slander. Yoshi's Island is NOT a collectathon, it's firmly a platformer. It has collectibles, but it's the single smartest use of collectibles I have ever seen in any game, since they act as a soft difficulty selector for the platforming. Going from start to finish in Yoshi's Island is piss easy, getting 100% on all stages is actually a little bit challenging, and the player is free to choose how difficult they make the game, and the difficulty selection is continuous throughout play.In a collectathon, collecting things is the focus. In a platformer, platforming is the main focus. Yoshi's Island is firmly a platformer. Banjo Kazooie is firmly a collectathon. Mario 64 exists somewhere in the middle.
>>12608381It doesn't, I like it quite a bit
>>12609449Nah, the rabbit stars are among the most fun in the entire game; the entire movement system was of course famously designed around chasing that rabbit and making it as exciting as possible, and it really shows. Mario 64 does have a lot of filler, two rabbit stars are par for the course. The dumbest stars by far are the three that are given to you by random Toads in the castle.
