This is the thing that regiments your life like a haphazard dictator.
This is the snake. This is the thing that will lie to you as it feeds you its haphazard sensations.
This is the Dragon of Chaos. For it sustains any sequence of emotionality so long as it is prominent enough. I had to fight this thing for a whole week. I thought for sure I was going to lose, because it was able to force its way back in somehow EVERY SINGLE TIME. Reasoning and logic be damned. It was relentless.
A lot of you ask me why I made such a flawed, Kafkaesque tapestry of a reality. And the truth is - I didn't realize that I was making it. I thought I was just trying to figure something out about myself. About my past. About my future. I believed that my thoughts worked just like any other person's. But it turns out, much to my chagrin, that I was painfully wrong. I don't understand you, Me. You do things for the oddest reasons and then invent some formula in your head that justifies it enough to where you can't argue it, because it outlives my attention span. You want things plain and simple, but then get angry and frustrated when nothing ever happens BECAUSE YOU WANTED THINGS PLAIN AND SIMPLE - and excitement is the enemy of predictability. You want to be happy, but you also want to be sad so you can be stoic and reserved. You will actively sabotage anything that threatens to be TOO GOOD OF A THING because then that would make you WAY TOO HAPPY - and that's BAD... Which then makes you sad. Very nice [sarcasm cue light].
The thing you have to understand about emotions, Me, is that they are *people*.I know you say you already know this, but I don't think you quite get it. Because... Dude, your emotions (it rather just a single emotion) can literally be yanked out of your mind, put into the mind of "blank" person, and then presto, you just created a soul which is now inhabiting that body it's attached to.
...
>>42659309Well? Nothing to say?
>>42659312... https://youtu.be/DKAklgvC250I like this song.
>>42659273Cool :]
>>42659273That's just your brain and central nervous systemEverything else on your body is a flesh space suit
>>42659302>You want to be happy, but you also want to be sad so you can be stoic and reserved. You will actively sabotage anything that threatens to be TOO GOOD OF A THING because then that would make you WAY TOO HAPPY - and that's BAD... Which then makes you sad. Very nice [sarcasm cue light].Because that's how life and the authority figures in it conditioned us.I speak from personal experience when I say this, but when I was a kid every time I tried to express myself in a way that the authority figures didn't like (be they teachers, or even my own parents) I got punished.And this wasn't a one time thing either, it's a consistent and repeated pattern that happened over and over until I created this fragmented personality in my subconscious that thought it was trying to protect me from being visible as it sabotaged me from actually pursuing anything worthwhile.Because every time I tried to be visible and stand up for myself and pursue success as a child I GOT PUNISHED FOR IT!!!How the fuck do you explain that? Are you gonna blame me for "not reacting the right way"?
bump.
>namefags fight their own brainChecks out
>>42659273>>42659275>>42659279>>42659302>>42659306Ive come to learn this kind of thinking is spiritual gas lighting to make r ape victims blame themselves for being rapedit s utterly demonic and only teaches you to accept submit to authority and put a smile on your face the world is satan grooming and manipulating satanand thats the cold hard truth just a bunch of selfish entities using/getting used by each other
>>42664018whoops wrong image but it has its relevance
that is just meat and fatstop making excuses
>>42659302I actually just wrote down an inspired thought concerning that this morning. Stupid title, but i called it 'Spirit Brain VS Body Brain or Current-Moment Consciousness VS Unconscious Repetition'. We can train our bodies and brains with repetitive tasks we partake in daily and our habits take residence somewhere in our minds; Ready to take over when we give them control whether it be intentional or not. Our habits affect our decision making but we have the power to alter them. I think of our bodies like personal computers; Our brain is the operating system, but our spirit is the user.
