>>43128127
==1. Sexual Transmutation==
This is basically semen retention. But it's not semen retention out of prudishness or a distorted idea of purity. It's semen retention in order to build up sexual energy, which is in essence creative energy. If you're a skeptic, just think about what semen is used for: it is used to create life, which is the only thing within ourselves that makes us similar to God, or whatever cosmogonic power you believe in. Secondly, there's a psychological element to it which is of utmost importance in this process. Your semen is valuable because you are valuable. To waste it on your toilet is a pure act of self-disrespect. The objective is to cultivate this energy, feel the warmth, feel the erotic and use it in a way that is a bit more spiritually salient than emptying your balls like an animal. It's not a lifelong commitment and sexual intercourse with the right person can even contribute to your sexual energy, just like intercourse with the wrong person can have the same effect of jacking off. You can tell instinctively by how you feel after sex. I felt drained every time with my ex, which has probably contributed in part to my current state. Furthermore, it physiologically increases your testosterone and cleans your dopamine receptors.

>>43128134
==2. Self-remembering==
You've heard a thousand times how good meditation is for you, but you've never done it consistently. Neither have I. Well, self-remembering is easier to do (can be done anywhere and anytime) and it is, in my experience, far superior. Most people act on autopilot and they forget about the Ego (the real 'I'). Defining the Ego, which in men can also be called the WILL, is crucial. Randomly, as you are going about your day (working or walking or talking with someone) keep doing whatever you're doing, but pay attention to:
- Your emotions (neutral is very rare, try finding your actual emotional state)
- Your senses (what you're smelling, touching, hearing etc.)
- Your physical sensations (cold, muscular pain, dry mouth etc.)
- Your thoughts (the random things you were thinking about, your worries etc.)
Keep this state of observation for as long as you can. By observing your mind and body, you subconsciously realize that someone is doing the observing: that is your TRUE SELF. It's the one thing that separates you from animals. After reading this, you will likely start doing this without even noticing. You will be shocked by how much of your life is spent in auto-pilot.

>>43128134
==3. Intentional suffering==
Don't whip yourself, that's not what this means. It is choosing the hardest path when the easier option is available. It is going against your animal instinct that maximizes pleasure and minimizes suffering. If the previous exercise individuated the WILL, this one defines it. According to Gurdjieff, doing this creates literal warmth inside you, a friction. To the animal this feels uncomfortable, for the sovereign Man this is inebriating. In psychology, this is also called the "locus of control". The animal way has an external locus of control (I can't do this because of this external reason), whereas Man should have an internal locus of control (I choose not to do this or I will do this anyways). So the idea is: whatever makes you uncomfortable, do that thing. If you can't, do something else but you must use your WILL to do it. WILL is not a verb, it is a literal part of you. It is the only true part of yourself.

ALL OF THESE TECHNIQUES ARE NON-NEGOTIABLE. You cannot do one, but not the other. They only work when done together. Of course while Gurdjieff defined them, he did not invent them. They are present in one way or another in a lot of esoteric and mystical traditions, the closest being mystical Christianity.

An important point is that the objective is ABSOLUTELY NOT to eliminate pleasure. It is the opposite of that. You have to use the lust accumulated from the sexual transmutation and imagine life itself as a divine feminine. Lust for life, make love with life. Savour every smell, taste and sight. You will find that your animalistic mechanic behaviour almost never lets you enjoy the sensual pleasures of life. Don't eat slop and distract yourself with youtube. Smell the food, look at the food, let your tongue touch the food and then taste it slowly. Focus completely on every action you are taking.

>>43128146
== The Mind ==
As I've said, I don't agree with Gurdjieff on everything. The one who got the closest to understanding the human machine, in my opinion, was Jung and especially his intuition that alchemy, and the esoteric in general, are manuals about the transmutation of the self from lead to gold. You are divided in the three primes:

- Sulphur (the Ego, the Will, the Spirit, the Soul)
- Mercury (the Mind, the Messenger, the Trickster)
- Salt (the Body, the Instinct, the Physical)

THE BIGGEST REALIZATION I HAVE HAD IS THAT THE MIND IS NOT YOU. This may sound basic to many and it would have sounded basic to me years ago as well. The difference is that knowledge, ironically, often remains in the mind. Many things we believe we "know", we do not truly "understand".

The thing that has helped me understand this concept is the fact that Mercury is much more than elemental quicksilver. Mercury is the greco-roman archetype of the trickster, which is the perfect way to describe the mind. The trickster has many important characteristics that define it:
- it is not a cartoonish villain, its morals are difficult to discern.
- it is more intelligent and more cunning than you, even if you are a literal God.
- it will never bend to your will and always finds a way to emerge victorious or strike a deal.

The animal bends to the trickster. The mind interprets the signals of the body and the animal obeys. Loud sound leads to spike in cortisol which leads to hiding. The animal has no choice. Man has to find a way to control the mind but it is not as easy as it sounds.

Some try forcing the mind to obey. That never works and when it does it always backfires. Some try ignoring the mind but that gives it more power, since it can act in the shadow (all Jungian shadows and archetypes are merely masks worn by the trickster).

The best way to deal with the mind is through compromise and acceptance. To better understand this, let's look at the story of Mercury/Hermes himself.

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>>43128149
==The Story of Hermes==
As a newborn, Hermes stole Apollo's cattle (Apollo being the Sun God, a representation of the Masculine Will). He made the cattle walk backwards and devised clever ways to confuse anyone who might follow him. Then he hid the animals and went back to his cradle. Apollo realized that Hermes was the thief. Furious, he went to confront him but the newborn made up all possible excuses, disarming Apollo. So they both went to Zeus (who represents the integrated Man) and Apollo accused Hermes of the theft. Zeus did not react in anger, instead he laughed, amused by his newborn son's audacity. Nevertheless, he ordered Hermes to return the cattle. On that same day Hermes had also invented the lyre. Apollo, who was furious at his half-brother, was intrigued by the instrument and struck a deal with Hermes. Apollo would receive the lyre and Hermes would receive the Caduceus: a golden staff with two wings and two snakes intertwined. For my purposes, I interpret the rod as the connection between the Tria Prima ascending from body to soul; the serpents are the energy that travels upwards, the coniunctio oppositorum; the wings are the symbol of freedom, the liberation of the Ego, represented by the knob at the top of the rod.

There's another crucial aspect of the interpretation: Hermes is a newborn which is a very weird detail since most newborns can't even see. Yet, Hermes does all this on his birth day. It's obviously a symbol. The immature mind is the trickster. Once the Ego makes peace with the mind and befriends it, then it becomes the messenger. Apollo is also traditionally represented as an ephebe, a young man. This represents an immature Ego, which tries confronting the mind through anger and force.

This is why I call the Sulphur "spiritus". There's a distinction between spirit as in alcoholic beverage (usually represented by Mercury in classical alchemy) and spirit in the latin sense of vitality or breath. The will IS vitality.

>>43128154
==The Feudal Metaphor==
The best way I've found to understand myself is the feudal analogy. Your body are the soldiers, servants and peasants. Your mind is the advisor. You are the Emperor (Ego).

Imagine the following scene: the peasants are hungry and they send a message to the advisor. The advisor panics and tells the Emperor. The immature mind will panic whether you're starving in a desert or you're skipping breakfast. The mind will try every trick in its arsenal to make you eat. Most people try and debate the mind: this is a losing approach that never works, it will always outsmart you. In the end, they acquiesce and give in and, like animals, they eat. Their Ego is essentially absent.
Now imagine yourself sitting on the throne when that happens. The advisor, a sweaty panicking scheming courtier, comes in and tells you "Emperor, if you don't eat you won't be able to sleep". The only correct answer is "Then we don't sleep". The sovereign issues orders and bears the consequences. It doesn't tell the advisor "it's only until noon, nothing will happen". The advisor will answer "But what difference would it make if you ate a little bit earlier? Please." You become entangled in the trickster's web, you have lost. I have hyper-identified with my mind for years, it had complete power over me. The mind is capable of wondruous things but authority is not one of them; it can't run an Empire. As you show your executive authority and the mind notices that it has made the realm better, it will learn to follow your will on its own. The objective is to "befriend" the mind, as Apollo did with Hermes.

The fact that there is a clear hierarchy, does not mean that the lower parts are less important than the Emperor. The Emperor without peasants cannot feed himself and the Emperor without courtiers cannot delegate and look over a vast realm. Furthermore, authority is good for everyone. A weak emperor is a disaster for all echelons of society.

>>43128159
==The Path of the Magus==
As we've seen, animals and mechanical men follow the same script: the external world or factors influence the body, the body sends a message to the mind and the mind either corrupts the Ego or bypasses it entirely. It is only logical that, once you learn to wield the power of the Ego, you can send energy in the opposite direction. When your Ego commands the mind, which commands the body, you can influence the external world. This is Magic. The wand, which is a phallic symbol of the solar will, is the conduit some magicians use to direct that energy. Magic is not something you think, nor something you feel: it is something you will. Even if you are not able or not willing to change the material world, this is the model you should aspire to. The final objective of self-definition is to invert the direction of the path of the animal.

==Masculinity==
A crucial component of the will is the fact that it is a uniquely masculine attribute. Women of course possess an Ego, but it is fundamentally different. When I speak of the Masculine Will, I am not referring to 'free will' (the basic agency to make choices in life). Women obviously possess agency and willpower. I am speaking of the Will to Power, the masculine, demiurgic impulse to define a trajectory, to will a reality into existence from nothing.

[Continues...]

>>43128163
The will is vectorial, it directs concentrated energy like a laser. The feminine ego is better understood as a gate. It stops or receives the masculine Ego. Man is the hammer and Woman is the anvil. Without the anvil, a hammer swings aimlessly in the air. When the hammer unites with the anvil, a masterpiece can be created.

As you do the three exercises we've discussed, you have to cultivate your masculinity as well, no matter what you currently look like. This will give you confidence and accelerate the process. These are some of the most important aspects to train:
- Walk extremely slowly and move deliberately.
- Do not smile without reason, but don't scowl either. Maintain a neutral expression and use your warmth as currency. If you always fawn and try to be liked, your warmth will be over-inflated, losing its value. If you choose when and how to reveal warmth, it will feel like a gift and ironically people will like you and respect you more. Please note: a smile is not a grin.
- Keep an upright posture. Don't overdo it or you'll look ridiculous. Imagine a string pulling you up by the crown. Your chin slightly angled forward.
- Avoid looking down (sometimes you have to, don't trip on a step like an idiot) and never break eye-contact by looking down. Choose when to initiate eye-contact and break it by looking sideways or up. Practice keeping eye contact with strangers, especially women. If they break eye contact, don't keep staring and continue on your own way. Be aware that with men it could lead to confrontation.
- Speak little and when you do, do it consciously. Be comfortable in the silence, wait a little longer before answering and take your time. Don't fill the silence with "emm" or random fillers. Actually, the more you wait and the more gravitas you'll have.
- Don't look at your phone and be present, practicing self-remembering and savoring life.
- Always say thanks but never say sorry, unless you truly are at fault and have to apologize.

>>43128174
==My Experience==
Finally, I will tell you my real experience. After spending six years as a recluse I decided to approach life not as a burden but as an experiment. I was curious to see whether all of this would actually work. I stopped jacking off (though the real benefits come in about two weeks), I practiced self-remembering and did my voluntary suffering by going out for a walk in the park. My social anxiety was spiking, I felt observed, the trickster mind was feeding me constant messages of self-hatred "they're laughing at you" "you look like an idiot" etc. But the difference is that this time I saw the mind for what it was: a baby trickster that's trying to provoke me. I was surprised at how quickly I was able to put these thoughts aside as something that was not "me".

The day after I willed to fast until noon. I did taxes, responded to emails and messages, called some customer service and took an executive decision about my future all before lunch. Those same tasks had paralyzed me for months. That was weird, I thought.

The day after I had a minor surgery, I had to put four suture points. I was relaxed and felt no pain afterwards, even when the effects of the anaesthetic wore off. That evening I had to go to the pharmacy to get antibiotics and practiced my anti-fawn protocol. Now, one thing you should know is that despite my weight and lifestyle, I have a naturally large body. I have a sleeper strongman build. I noticed immediately that when I entered the pharmacy, the lady at the counter felt uncomfortable. When I approached the lady I remained neutral and made my request politely (politeness is not fawning, don't be an asshole), she was still pretty cold. At the end of the transaction I deliberately chose to make a joke and reveal my warmth. The smile on her face went from ear to ear, she completely relaxed and the interaction ended on a positive note. I, the recluse, had made someone's day better.

[Continues...]

>>43128180
The following day I really didn't want to go out, yet when I heard my mind agreeing with me, something clicked. I am, like an Emperor, trying to reclaim my authority after years of absence. The will is called such because you can redirect it as you see fit. Even if I truly did not want to go out, I focused my will on going out instead. And I did one of the things that I disliked the most: buying clothes. I continued my social experiments, walked slowly and took my sweet time. I went to pay and tried the same routine again. However the joke came too early and I inadvertently caused a hot-cold dynamic instead of a cold-hot one. Just like warmth is a gift, retaining warmth is a punishment. Be aware of this. The woman at the counter who seconds earlier was laughing out loud in the middle of the store literally folded in half, at the end was visibly submissive, avoiding my gaze. This felt bad but, in the grand scheme of things, it didn't matter and I have learned a lesson. The mind, predictably, had a field day: "She thought you were a creep" "you are a terrible person" "you are a manipulator". I let the trickster speak. This also showed how easy it is to modulate people's emotions when you're in control. Use it responsibly.

>>43128186
The next day, Saturday, I wanted to test my limits: I went to a big mall in the peak hour, probably the thing I hated the most. I Went to several shops, but this time I decided to let go and just observe social interactions as they came. This is an important moment, it's when you realize that the will does not think. It does not stop and calculate the angle of your brow or the seconds of eye-contact. Bravery and letting go are both qualities of the Will. It is the confidence that you will land on your feet. Apart from some minor stumbles, it went great. Then I wanted to go home, but again... my mind was too eager of this outcome, so I redirected my will and went for a walk in the same park. This is when I realized that self-remembering is also about savoring the moment. I felt a rush of bliss as I was capturing, with all my senses, each moment. The moments of self-remembering during that walk are the only parts that I remember vividly. But I forgot that I had four sutures in my leg and, predictably, they busted open. I went panic mode, the scared animal came back, and I went to the ER (love public healthcare). But I observed my mind, all of its tricks had gone, and as I was waiting for my turn a sense of peace and relaxation overcame me. I waited four hours, without a phone, just observing myself and time flew past. This is nothing short of a miracle for someone like me, who believed (and partly still believes) he had undiagnosed ADHD. After they finally called me, I was lying down on the examination table, with my pants down in a room full of strangers. Not only was I totally relaxed, I was joking and made quick friends with the male nurse who then gifted me like 20 band-aids. I went home that night and I thought "that was fun".

>>43128193
This is the unadulterated truth about what has happened to me over the course of five days, although the shift has happened really in 72 hours. And this is the reason why I felt it was of the utmost importance to share this with others. A month ago I could have taken my life and left this world forever and now, somehow, I am lusting after life like a horny teen. Please try this. Even if it doesn't work, at least know that there is something out there that will make you click. Peace.

Very interesting
I believe you
I'm still reading but I can see this knowledge helped you to socialize; I don't have that problem. I want to heal my body... so, what about physical pain? Can this knowlesge be used to heal or avoid physical pain?

Gurdjieff is goated, but his works are difficult to read, and often play games in the vein of Crowley by hiding information behind triple-blind metaphors and ponderous narrative.

>>43128210
Pain is the most primal animal reaction, it directly triggers your survival instinct. It's not an easy feat, but if you read the whole thing, you'll see that my perception of pain also decreased somehow. Whether it can actually heal, I cannot promise that but I imagine it could. Take care friend.

>>43128127
Thank you for this.
Very clear, concise, and well constructed.
Also, congrats on making it out.

>>43128250
That's how they keep the occult as such. Once you look under the hood, most of it is actually pretty understandable stuff. But I think that metaphors are important because they bypass the analytical mind, which acts as a gate to true understanding.

>>43128280
And thank you for reading the whole thing, friend

5 star thread

>>43128180
> I practiced self-remembering and did my voluntary suffering by going out for a walk in the park.
Dude, that hardly counts as suffering. If it is hard for you I am glad that you are working through your problems.
>The day after I willed to fast until noon.
Again this is just not eating for most of the day.
What it seems like you have done is realize that you were overthinking things and stopped ruminating, I don't think nofap is the missing link

>>43128332
my friend, if you overload the body and mind on the first day, you will crumble immediately. These are absolutely trivial things, you are right, but it is just the beginning. The biggest voluntary suffering, and the one that also Gurdjieff recommended, was the social exposure and the acceptance of rejection as an outcome. For a socially anxious person like I was, that's like a knife in the gut.

>>43128127
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>>43128127 (OP)
I've been thinking deeply on my understanding of my own mind and have come to many of these points on my own, but I was still stuck. I realized once that who I was, was greater than my thoughts and feelings, and that the world around me could be greater as well, but I only remembered and thought will was beyond feelings, and so I've been struggling for a bit, limited by the mind. You helped me realize that was the next frontier to breach, and I'm really thankful you found the will to stick around, figure these things out, and share them. Good luck to you and whatever you try to accomplish.

>>43128199
>at least know that there is something out there that will make you click
The wisest thing you said in this thread. I'm happy you found a way and wish all the success to you and might even try this but I feel my commitment and success is found elsewhere.

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Good thread

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>>43128134
>This is basically semen retention.
Stopped reading here, I have cum cult fatigue.

>>43132476
To be fair, Gurdjeff's philosophy is about conserving and transmuting energy from all the body's "centers", not just the sexual one