I’m a female in my early 20s and my ex-friend is male, also in early 20s. He used to be my only friend, and I cared about him deeply. I even confessed my feelings once, but he rejected me, but we still remained close friends. Unfortunately, I found out he had been mocking me behind my back for months, calling me “mentally disabled” to his best friend. Then, last month, he confronted me directly about my autism and berated me for sometimes needing help from my parents. Even after all that, I still wanted to be his friend, so I apologized to him and tried to make things right, but he ignored me. It’s now been over a month since this has happened, and I’m realizing how unfairly he treated me. I feel sad and hurt over losing someone I cared about, and angry that he faces no consequences for the way he treated me. Am I selfish for wishing he did? And most importantly, how can I move on from him and stop holding on to the idea of being his friend again?
>>33651886Take comfort in knowing he put off being honest and mocked you because he is first and foremost a jealous coward. His belief that people should be completely independent probably comes from a distinction in what his own family expects of him as an adult male. Knowing his own family probably wouldn't help him the same way yours does probably annoys him because he won't ever obtain that kind of care from others. That kind of envy never truly dies. Just do your best to befriend new people who have the empathy to think beyond their own narrow experiences and do your best to treat them the way you want them to treat you. If they are genuine, they will reciprocate.
>>33651939Thank you for this! I had never thought of it this way before but it helps a ton. Though, I do have a bit of stupid question for you though. Do you a foresee a future where we could ever be friends again, or do you think this is it for us?
>>33651886>but he ignored meI think this is the best thing he might have ever done for you honestly. This was a rare moment where he was actually honest in not wanting to be your friend and that's only to your benefit. You're not selfish or bad for wishing he faced consequences but it also wouldn't do much for you even if he did. It just feels this way now. But the best consequence for you is that you acknowledged that he never really was a friend to you and never will be.
>>33652002>Do you a foresee a future where we could ever be friends again, or do you think this is it for us?I am not the guy you replied to I am this guy >>33652038But just to answer your question with a big NO. Don't ever do that to yourself. You were NEVER friends as he never treated you as one. Pursuing any relationship or connection to him would lead to you being hurt. You shouldn't depend on people who are gonna let you down.
>>33651886I don't know you OP so i can't say exactly what you should or shouldn't do, however like other people said maybe it's a good idea to try to befriend new people and over time that pain will fade, don't force yourself too hard tough, like everything in life it takes time to adjust to new situations and it's best done in moderation and with a clear head and heartHope for the best and good luck
>>33651886Sounds like he isn't a loss, and is a fake piece of shit. Get revenge instead.
