I'm 27M virgin, ive never kissed or had a romantic relationship. I've never had the chance to experience intimacy with someone but whenever i see someone i'm attracted to IRL or whenever i daydream about meeting someone etc., i imagine her having sex with another person, i imagine her sucking his penis, taking his penis inside her, him cumming on her (basically having sex but detailed,vividly). Whenever i imagine this scenario in my head, i feel repulsed by her and i dont see myself doing anything intimate with her, i feel like she's dirty? i know that people shower and clean themselves but... idk how to explain it, let me give you an analogy so maybe you can understand how i feel better.Imagine you have a favorite mug and a man comes into your house and spits in your mug, puts their penis inside it, pees and cums in it. Would you continue to drink from this mug knowing that this happened? objectively, you could clean it with disinfectant or bleach, and it would be clean, but im pretty sure most people wouldn't put their lips on it and continue to drink from this mug, you would throw it out, because remembering that it happened disgusts you and prevents you from drinking from that mug.I'm afraid that this thought process might cause me problems in the future when i have the chance to experience intimacy with someone but i'm not even sure if i can overcome this, i dont even know if i need therapy or it would disappear on its own when it happens IRL.
>>33662269>see woman>be attracted to woman>immediately think of BIG VEINY COCKS, PULSATING PENIS EJACULATING SEMEN, SWEATY BALLS SWINGING BACK AND FORTHMy friend, you are gay.>the famous "would you drink out of this mug" exampleIf you've ever eaten at a restaurant, you've put things in/on your mouth (fork, cups, mugs) that a thousand people have also put in it theirs - and lord knows what goes on in the back of the kitchen with the staff as well.
>>33662269>i imagine her sucking his penisYou sound like a massive cuck/faggot.>I'm repulsed by non-virgin women.Then marry a virgin women. I don't see how this is a complicated question.
>>33662269Either invest in a virgin, or try to find a woman who shares your values who maybe hasn't had sex in awhile. Abstinence is still admirable even in people who have spelt around in the past. If she isn't sleeping around currently and demonstrates commitment, she's worth it in my opinion.
>>33662269unironically start having sex. you need to keep having sex with different women until you feel numb and stop caring about body counts
>>33662296i aware that this is a inconsistent and irrational thought process, im not arguing anything here, i gave the example to make people understand how i feel and im pretty thats how most people would feel against the mug, i doubt you would drink from it >>33662307>You sound like a massive cuck/faggot.why? thats literally what you do when you have sex with other people. do you just ignore it or pretend like it didnt happen?>Then marry a virgin women>>33662310looking for a virgin makes my already small dating pool much smaller after age 25-30, also its actually so rare that i would think that theyre lying about it and do the thought experiment and be repulsed by them also
>>33662320Shitty advice dude.>Just sleep around and engage in behavior that will ruin your pair ponding abilityDon't listen to this retard. Try to find a woman who you want to be with long term, talk to her about what you want out of life, ask her what she wants out of life. Find a life partner, not a hunk of flesh.
>>33662327>why?Thinking of penis makes you gay.
>>33662296>guys who get mad women have sex are gay38 years and I have never heard this take. I accept it fully, I will never attempt to find any evidence to support it, Ill run with it forever, and tell others of it.>>33662269That means you're gay, Faggot
>>33662335he is 27 years old, unc is cooked
It's a self-defence mechanism for you to avoid real intimacy with anyone. It's likely even if you found a virgin you'd have an excuse as to why you couldn't be with her
>>33662369I'm 26, Men are still fertile for at least another decade or two. And more and more people want something healthy and genuine. We're all getting tired of the party culture mindset.Let's invest time in trying to define something real.
>>33662370i legit dont care about the virginity status itself, im not purist or religious or something but even if a girl told me that she's virgin i would find it hard to believe because never having a relationship + virgin is really rare around my age and women are inclined to lie about it because virginity is often praised
>>33662370>it's only only an inch and a half away from her asshole
>>33662327>>33662411Can you explain why going for younger girls is not an option? I mean, as long as they are 18 and over, what's the deal?
>>3366242218-21 come off as childish to me personality wise, i would be attracted physically but i dont see myself having a relationship with someone that young. i need to overcome this problem man, it will cause problems in the future when i find someone that i can date withthe problem is how my brain works, i dont know if ill need therapy or something to overcome this but also going to therapy for something this "stupid" feels embarrassing
>>33662454Don't go to therapy whatsoever, it's a scam. You need proper socialization. Sitting in a room with a paid professional ain't gonna solve shit. Avoiding younger women as a general rule is typically fine because they lack life experience. But you also lack life experience, so perhaps you might find a good match with a younger girl whose along the same stage of her progression as you.
Would you drink from a mug after pissing and cumming in it yourself?The mug also shits and pisses and bloodies itself as natural functions btw, why does that not bother you?
>>33662516im aware that my thought process is inconsistent and irrational bro, im not arguing anything here, thats just how i feel and i gave the example to make you better understand how i feel. do you have a gf or wife? how do you feel when you imagine them having sex with someone else in your mind? i imagine it vividly and it ruins their image in my mind, makes sense? i imagine them sucking someone elses cock, them cumming on their face, moaning under them etc. do you understand? i dont think you would feel good when you imagine this unless you have a cuck fetish and enjoy it
>>33662538>how do you feel when you imagine them having sex with someone else in your mind?Why the fuck would I imagine that? Same as her taking a shit, it disgusts me, so I simply don't imagine it. Compulsively picturing something that makes you so uncomfortable that you can't lead a normal social life sounds like severe mental illness.
>>33662296>>BIG VEINY COCKS, PULSATING PENIS EJACULATING SEMEN, SWEATY BALLS SWINGING BACK AND FORTHWhy would you put this in caps?
>>33662269i think you're cooked man, 27 is way too late. sure you might eventually have sex but you've built it up so much in your head when you finally do you'll get extremely attached to any woman that gives you affection.become a monk and go the path of celibacy.
>>33662573Because I am a published writer and I have had sex with over 10 000 tik tik influencers
>>33662556>Compulsively picturing something that makes you so uncomfortable that you can't lead a normal social life sounds like severe mental illness.yeah i think thats exactly the problem
>>33662556>>33662711but im also not imagining things that didnt happen, they DID happen so its not just in my head, you feel me? makes it harder to not think like this
>>33662719Stop thinking, start acting.
>>33662711>>33662719You need to be more disciplined. Control your thoughts. Women have diarrhea for real, it's natural to shit and have sex, hyperfixating on something you feel is dirty will prevent your own normal functioning.What if you get a virgin gf and spiral further, imagine her cheating on you or schlicking to BBC? Or suspect she was lying? Or just imagine it out of habit, marking her dirty through this telepathic cuckoldry.>they DID happenNot all nonvirgin women have gotten cum on them or orgasmed from dick. The vivid scenarios playing out in your head are not something that's happened to her; they aren't reality and in this case don't even represent a typical sex life.
>>33662388A decade ot 2? Dude men are fertile til theyre like 70. Youre confusing that with women. Who can be fertile into their 40s
>>33662411I assure you women, for the part of thr grand majority, do not like that theyre virgins.
>>33662780Quantity over quality anon, just because men can produce children beyond that age doesn't mean they should. It carries higher risk of deformity, mental retardation, etc.Sperm quality decreases with age.
>>33662780>men are fertile til theyre like 70yeah but you're also totally upping the chances of ending up with a proper autistic kid
>>33662797When people learn how badly we all got robbed in being to told to go out and party while you're young instead of having kids in your most fertile years, all hell is going to break loose.The people promoting this degeneracy will be put to death.
>>33662797Those odds are practically negligible. Its based on people not understanding that "50% more likely for birth defects" when the base chance was 1% brings it to 1.5%, and that birth defect itself is a very very broad term and includes things like "cleft lip" which they can fix.Having a child is risky in general. Theres always a chance of defects or pregnancy complications.
Don't. She'll also be thinking about herself having sex with another person, sucking his penis, taking his penis inside her, him cumming on her
>>33662780>have kids at 40>deal with teenagers at 55>if you're lucky, have your house to yourself and return to normal leisure + sex life at 58-65>senile when your kids are 30>die before they hit 40Even if it's technically possible most women aren't willing to have kids at that age or with men that age. It should also be noted that the average age gap for marriage is 3 years and it's implausible for women to go much beyond that for some in/volcel who had zero pull even in his prime.
>>33662839wutit's completely the opposite with incels telling other incels that their prime years should be spent on being work slaves whose only concern is buying things and making numbers go up and ignoring women altogether because somehow women will just fall from the sky onto their lap once they hit a magical number in their savings account.
>>33662840that's assuming you have normie sperm to being with
>>33662920False Dichotomy anon.The options thus defined are either:>Wageslave for nothingor>Pursue cheap pleasuresWe should pursue women, work hard to build a family, have kids, save money for long term prosperity/generational wealth, and focus on our health and general wellbeing.Saving money or generally investing in the future of your family/race is what people have always done, and if we want to promote health we have to look towards building a healthy sustainable future. Our biology is wired for this.
i post it on r/therapy you guys are just making fun of me, not helpful at all
>>33662929>False Dichotomy anon.No I know, but that's what incels are telling each other>Chat, should I go out and meet girls?>No, stop wasting your time as a 22 year old, focus on your work and money so that you can then maybe go on your very first date as a socially inept 37 year oldBecause these people are shy and awkward they tell themselves that the fairy tale of the ugly duckling is actually legitimate and that free virgin girlfriends will fall upon them when the finish paying off their house or whatever.Most thread posted by dudes who are older than college aged will always post about how they couldn't possibly be dating girls in college, or in high school, because they were busy with homework. Somehow they couldn't do two of those things at the same time.
>>33662269You gotta install the thoughts in your mind that you're just gonna be a judge for people like the Supreme Court of the United States. You gotta act like any mass shooter/school shooter that comes along did so because of your blessing and carry that. That is how this works.
>>33662269Anon, I get why you'd think that way I really do. But also remember life is fucking short man. The way it reads it sounds more like a visceral reaction than true values but i could be wrong. I'm not saying you can't feel how you feel about it but if you go down the path of reducing a woman, someone you hope to be with to something less than a person then you're casting stones in a glass house at that point. I'm not saying it's right or wrong, and maybe it's for the better but you're shrinking your pool drastically going for only virgins. I'd focus more on overall prudence and lack of promiscuity. There are a lot of decent women who legit regret losing their virginity a certain way or fucking around to a degree, adjust and could make good waifus.Yes there are virgins fucked in the head that are promiscuous, it's not an auto stable relationship no matter what anyone says. Also yeah you don't want someone who's diet has been cum up until a week prior to talking to you as that's a pattern issue. As far as this thought process causing you problems, it will likely especially if you keep comparing them to mugs and shit. I had an issue with my now wife, having been with only one guy once in which she stopped it after like 10 sec. She was good enough to tell me everything because I was sperging out, tight chest type shit. Not all insecurity is bad but my point there is that my insecurity almost blew up being with a woman who was willing to do anything to prove how regretful she was and loyal etc etc. She's like a more well adjusted yandere, actually communicates, all that jazz. A good faith second chance can change your life, so try to start looking at everyone as people who can be better if they show it.
>>33662335He’s a man, that pair-bonding shit doesn’t apply.
>>33664620Pair bonding applies just as much to men as to women, you have the same chemical capacity for this as any woman.
>>33662269>People who are "dirty" are irredeemable to you>Your sexual repression also means you will likely never have a healthy relationship with your own sexuality. Never change. Succumb to your delusions. Do you avoid ever using public restrooms too?
>>33664645right, but the stuff about women's pair bonding being inhibited is specifically about the males genetics getting on her inside, which does not apply to the male scenario. you will never hurt your ability to pair bond from too many partners as a male
>>33662269>Instantly compares woman to objectI might be seeing your issue
>>33665498Humans are objects.
>>33662269Why would you overcome this feeling?You have it for a reason.It isn't culturally ingrained, rather the opposite.It is so obviously instinctive.
>>33662556You are now imagining your wife/gf having steamy, passionate sex with her ex as you read this. You're welcome.
>>33662269>Imagine you have a favorite mug and a man comes into your houseExcept the woman is not your favorite mug; she's not "your" anything. They guy in your analogy is putting his penis into HIS mug and the mug wants him to do it.You meanwhile should have picked up a mug of your own years ago if getting an unused mug was such a priority for you. The mugs haven't done anything wrong by not waiting for you to pick them.
>>33662538>i imagine them sucking someone elses cock, them cumming on their face, moaning under them etc. do you understand?>i dont think you would feel good when you imagine this unless you have a cuck fetish and enjoy itLmao, no one without a cuck fetish is imagining this in such vivid detail to begin with.
>>33664537thank you,I don't care about the virginity status at all, im not purist and i dont think this is about the person itself, its compulsive and cant stop feeling like this even though i know its irrational, most likely something like OCD>>33664799i dont remember the last time i touched anywhere in a public restroom, i only pee standing and wash my hands>>33665498people on rddit fixated on my analogy also, everyone called me a misogynist, but that was supposed to help you understand how i feel, its not a 1on1 comparison, thats absurd, maybe a better comparison would be, feeling disgusted when someone talks about vomit or shit etc. while eating food, it makes you imagine things and you dont wanna continue eating, imagine me coming into your house and cumming on your food
>>33665760because its very problematic and it doesnt make sense, i ruin their image in my head>>33666178i know that? and it doesnt change anything>>33666185i think its the opposite, you know these things happened and you just dont care, like you see no problem with it at all
>>33662269you ARE a faggot, nobody straight walks around thinking about pulsating cocks 24/7. good luck finding a virgin faggot man
>>33662269that's a natural response. why overcome it? you will only harm yourself by dating used goodstrust met. knower
>>33665760That's half right but if it was such an ingrained instinct you'd see it represented across the whole male population. I'm not saying anyone is wrong for wanting someone not promiscuous/prudent but saying 'it's instinct so it must be right' is a cop out and doesn't track. >>33666267I gotcha, and yeah didn't mean to fixate on the virgin thing but if the possibility of what a girl has done before you really rubs you that much then it might be better to accept you're going to have to filter strongly for prudence which is going to require some amount of getting to know her on some level. Yeah some chicks you'll immediately be able to tell are no-go. I had a coworker who openly talked about eating guys assholes and I've seen her just leave the bar with randos, has made moves on me too. Literally the stereotypical foid you hear tales of. You have others that are a bit more unassuming but they have done some stuff too. I'm 32 and have seen a spectrum for sure. Either way man I think working on the framing of 'this is just a person I need to get to know and see if our values align, if I find something that hits weird I ask if it's a standard, if so then I amicably cut it off." DO work on not judging them so consciously or harshly, we all wish we had some understanding. If you don't want to use a dirty mug you don't go down a manifesto spiral of what disgusts you about it right? You just say 'nah I'm good'. DON'T shit on yourself for not being "experienced" at 27. You don't need to bang around to know how to be and find a good partner and that misinfo is probably the worst thing out there. At least this way you're training your empathy and sociability while putting effort to find someone you care about. As gay as it sounds.
>>33662778how come they arent real bro? thats literally what sex is, penis into the vagina and mouth, not everyone cums on their partner but they most likely didbut yes ill try to force myself to stop doing having these images in my mind but its compulsive like it flashes for a moment even when i try to stop it so i dont know if i can>>33666679thank you, i just need some dating experience, hopefully the problem will disappear on its own when i get to know the person better
>>33662269>27M virginyou're even lower on the dating market value ladder than the high body count women you fantasize about
>>33662269>what if a mug was dirty???????? What if other people has used it?!?!?bro has never been to a restaurant
>>33666936This being a virgin = failure meme is the biggest psyop out there. Most 'slayers' are either plain ruled by their lust or just like to project status and brag to their friends about it which means they need external approval. Please focus on better things.
>>33666887Np man, people can suck in many ways, and you can suck too if you let it be that way but you only need one or two legit good folk for that to not be the case so you'll be fine.
>>33667025>what is preselection
>>33667025>Most 'slayers' are either plain ruled by their lust or just like to project status and brag to their friends about it which means they need external approval. Most people aren't "slayers" either, a lot of dudes will just have sex with like 5 or 6 girls throughout their entire life without boasting about it.and it's not so much that OP is a virgin but it's that he's never even been on a date because all he can think of in presence of women is the thousand erect penises hiding in his subconscious. If he was a virgin who had at least been on a few dates, maybe even dated a girl or two and felt some boobs it would be understandable.>Please focus on better things.What better things? What's better than the pursuit of romance and happiness?
>>33667053>>33667053Preselection is a thing but it's not as deterministic as values, looks, compatibility, etc. More like a modifier to your 'core stats'.Also that modifier is a bigger issue in certain settings (apps, clubs) vs others (just getting to know someone). >>33667061Correct, a lot of guys play shit up. I myself have lied before but it was just to get my 'friends' at the time off my back about someone, still stupid. I had another guy who slept with 150+ women, but he's just having a kid and got married now. He would and still does sometimes show me his list of girls he got and video evidence which he still keeps and brags about it with a few other guys like him. I used to live with him so I can verify those numbers somewhat but I don't see the marriage/kids stuff going well desu but who knows. >what better things?Maybe sounds cope but you don't need another human for romance or happiness, also happiness is better (for me) as a byproduct vs a goal. Plenty of artists that move people who focused only on their craft during parts of their life. If/when you do find someone you'll have a much better capacity to not fuck it up because that's a good portion of people out there.
>>33662422>Can you explain why going for younger girls is not an option?He's a nearly 30 year old virginity-obsessed, autistic, 4chan trolling virgin. He's invisible to nearly all women, especially young ones.
>>33667199>Maybe sounds cope but you don't need another human for romance or happiness, also happiness is better (for me) as a byproduct vs a goal. Plenty of artists that move people who focused only on their craft during parts of their life. If/when you do find someone you'll have a much better capacity to not fuck it up because that's a good portion of people out there.yeah it does sound like cope, lots of artists get off on being miserable/depressed as the source of their inspiration. Conversely lots of artists are also happily married or at the very least dating girls like anyone else would.OP is sitting there writing 50 "penis" per minute, unable to even talk to women, so I don't know what sort of creative endeavor he could get into that would move and inspire people
>>33667256I was in art school and played bass before the military and yeah you get a mix. I'd push back and say everyone gets depressed, you just see that shit magnified from artsy types because expression is the name of the game, and like you said they do really like it in it's own way. Also hella drugsI don't just mean artists in the conventional sense. Any endeavor. If my wife left tomorrow I'd probably just focus a lot more on my mesh networks, cube satellites, and some electrical engineering shit I do on the side for places with shit internet. I love sailing and racing sailboats but don't get to do it as much. I can keep going but yeah I can fill up decades with good things to do and my self worth/happiness doesn't come from her. I adore her but my happiness/worth is something that comes from me that I give to her and vice-versa. Don't need to take my advice though. As far as OP is concerned, I guess the point is being in a relationship with someone is only going to exacerbate his thoughts if he can't sort his perspective. So what can you do? A lot imo, hence my take.
>>33662269You don't actually have a reason to be repulsed by non-virgin women. Unironically, your best chances for finding a loving companion is to specifically find an adulteress and date her. Don't be judgmental about her choices, treat her nice, and she'll be an affectionate and loyal lover.
>>33667321>, I guess the point is being in a relationship with someone is only going to exacerbate his thoughtsIs it?Or is he going to finally realize that all those penises only exist in his head, and that kissing a girl actually feels nice.
