Well, this week I took the bus to university and ended up sitting next to a girl who seemed a bit older than me (I'm 19). She was reading something about Einstein and the expansion of the universe, so I asked her about it, and from there, we chatted the whole way until we got there. On campus, she showed me around a bit (even though I already knew most of it), and it was such an unexpected but awesome interaction—I really felt welcomed around her. I wanted to talk more, but we both had classes.The issue is, I didn't ask for her Instagram because I didn't want it to seem like I was hitting on her or anything. I don't know if she was just being polite or if she actually enjoyed the conversation. She even told me where she'd have class that day, so I've been thinking about "waiting" nearby to simulate a casual run-in, or showing up early at the bus stop to try and catch the same bus as her and chat again. But all that sounds kinda crazy and stalkery, right? I've never gotten to this stage before.Today I even woke up with more energy to go to class, thinking about the chance of bumping into her. On the other hand, I've also considered just letting it go—it was a nice chat, but if she wanted more, she could find me since I mentioned my major.So, anons, what should I do? Should I try for a "casual encounter" or is it better to forget about it and let things happen naturally?
>>33689071Hmm... let me ask you this first: what country are you from?
>>33689071>oh we talked but he didn’t ask for my number so I guess he’s not interestedthis is the mindset most woman have because they’re retarded and still believe in traditional gender roles in dating but want equality everywhere else. just go find her and tell her you wanna hang out with her and get her digits
>>33689071Well if you met her on the bus once you will probably just meet her there or nearby again. You think she's only gonna take the bus to class one time?Anyway yeah just hang around a little. Literally the worst thing that can happen in this situation is nothing.
>>33689071>I really felt welcomed around her. I wanted to talk more, but we both had classes.Goodshit.>I didn't ask for her Instagram because I didn't want it to seem like I was hitting on her or anything. And this is the first fuckup. You don't get a girlfriend by acting like her friend, bro. You get a girlfriend by making it clear that you're interested in her in that way. Don't be scared to hit on her. Girls like being hit on by men they like. And there was a fuckton of positive energy there. Worst case? She says no and you never see her again. You also don't waste months putting yourself in the friendzone by "being a gentleman" while other dudes hit on her and get a direct answer, which she may directly accept. Because that's...literally how it works. >So, anons, what should I do? Should I try for a "casual encounter" or is it better to forget about it and let things happen naturally?Whatever happens happens. Think about it.>I don't wanna seem like I'm hitting on herBut>Should I create a situation where I try to hit on her?Brother, lol. You're learning so it's all good. Don't go out of your way to find her. That's simp shit and creepy. If you see her again, just be up front and say something like>Hey! You're that Enstein book chick right? You seem cool but I was rushed and didn't get your number. We should hang sometime.It's that simple. Then don't do that "pretend to be her friend" bullshit. Treat her like a normal person. Make sexual innuendo. Flirt. Hit on her a little bit. Test the waters. Make it clear where your interest is instead of lying and pretending to be her friend. You'll get the real answer you want much faster that way.>>33689604>oh we talked but he didn’t ask for my number so I guess he’s not interested>this is the mindset most woman have because they’re retarded Idiocy. Women are passive and men are active. A man asks for what he wants. You're just a pussy who wants to be lazy.
>>33689071This is a VERY normal way for people to meet, and there is nothing weird about following up on it. Do "just run into her" and say Hi. If she's friendly, you can say "I enjoyed our little chat on the bus yesterday. Would you like to continue it over coffee/drinks/lunch someday soon?"
>>33689071Normalize women in your head, here's the mindset: "She's just another person. Just like a dude. If a dude talked to me so nicely and showed me around the campus, I'd ask his name, what he studies, and his insta. Therefore I should do the same with this girl"If you perceive every interaction as flirting, you're going to lose. Understand that girls live this sort of lifestyle by design where men hit on them constantly, but it still doesn't stop them from living. They just live despite all that. First of all you aren't a bad person for seeming like you flirt, I had/have that for a long time now but trying to get over it. Second, it's perfectly fine to find another human nice, and to try and form a long term connection with them by asking for contact. This is not flirting, this is you genuinely being interested in the other person because they are nice. You don't have to define everything in your head, but if you had to then I would say, define these people as: "someone awesome and friendly who I want to hang out with further"I know that I'm healthymaxxing right now with this advice, but this is what I've been following for a good half a year now. And it's gotten me girl friends. Nothing romantic so far, but I did get to make both guy and girl friends, and some of these connections were very emotionally rewarding. I feel like the more I do it the easier it gets, and I'm getting comfortable with telling a person if I enjoy their company. I'm afraid of flirting, so for me this is just being friendly, but I feel like this is how I'll eventually meet a gf as well, by being friendly and making connections. I trust that eventually one will pick me and I'm not forcing it, I'm in many women spaces weekly already, so it'll come. Also, make sure you ACTUALLY enjoy her as a person, not just because she's a girl. Some dudes in this thread are absolute coomers and that never ends well for you. Reciprocate attention!! Don't force it!Follow the path!!
>>33689071just think of women as retarded guys and all will be good
>>33689775Every once in a while, someone like this comes around to these boards who actually knows how to deal with women. OP, don't ignore this.
>>33691186We know it's you samefagging. Terrible pua tier "just be a creep bro if she's easy you'll get laid" advice
OP here. I didn't expect anyone to reply.>>33689604Yeah, that does sound a bit too direct.>>33689740I thought about maybe going earlier and hanging around until I see her, then I could approach, but I know that idea kinda sounds creepy.>>33690563Thanks for sharing your experience. I think if I see her next week, I should just be honest and tell her I enjoyed our last interaction.>>33691186I get that — even if this isn’t really the best place to ask for advice on stuff like this, it’s still the only place I feel comfortable enough to vent.>>33689775Yeah, you seem right, anon. I think I’m just being lazy and a bit cowardly. On Thursday, if I see her again, I’ll try to be sincere and follow your “script.” If that happens, I’ll come back here to post and let you guys know if it went right or wrong.
>>33691948NTA but the one who posted the large post he responded to in affirmation. Nobody said be a creep. I said don't be the stereotypical nice guy who's afraid to hit on a girl. You can be polite while flirting. You can be respectful while letting her know your intentions. The worst thing you can do is pretend you want to be her friend when you really want to date her. That's worse than being a creep because at least you're being honest about who you are, lmao. The fact that "creep" is the first thing that came to mind when you read that is massive self projection. Work through your issues anon. There are lots of people above your level, clearly.>>33692011>I think I’m just being lazy and a bit cowardly. On Thursday, if I see her again, I’ll try to be sincere and follow your “script.” Don't over rehearse and make it a script. Just a general idea of what you wanna say. Let it flow and be genuine. And if it doesn't work....oh well. Start saying hi to random women on campus. Not to get with them. Just to build up the muscle of speaking to women, so when you come across someone you really do like, it's completely natural and you don't have to think about anything.
>>33689071>I've never gotten to this stage before.Relax. Calm down. This is a normal human interaction that people have every day and nothing awful happens.She would never tell you where her class was if she was absolutely opposed to the idea of you finding her. Clearly, she wanted you to know. Go to her class, find her when she's walking out, tell her "Hey, I really enjoyed chatting the other day, here's my instagram if you want to hit me up and hang out against sometime." Simple. Give her your info, put the ball in her court. If she is interested she'll hit you up, if she isn't she won't. Regardless, there's nothing creepy or crazy or ridiculous about asking a girl you met at college and got along with for her instagram. Its an easy, 30 second conversation between two human people in a public place. Its not rocket science. You're overthinking it
>>33689071I guess it could be construed as creepy but if you deliberately catch the same bus as her its really not that big of a deal. Its not like you're cornering her in an alley and if she genuinely likes you and things progress, then you going out of your way to meet her again would be seen as endearing.Don't do this more than once though if youre not going to ask for her number, then it definitely becomes weird simp shit. Either commit or dont.>>33689604They might think this but they also wouldn't just write OP off forever because of the first try. If he sees her again the door isn't necessarily closed.
>>33692606I get what you meant now. I think I let my own insecurity twist your words into something negative. You’re right — it’s much better to be direct and respectful than to hide behind the “nice guy” act. I’ll keep that in mind.>>33692624Yeah, I can see I’m overthinking this. Better to just let things happen naturally. If I run into her again, I’ll just go with the flow and then come back here to share how it went.
