>grew up with liberal mom>told her I want to be a they/them enby>She let me dress however I wanted growing up>People only ever treated me like a girl>Puberty, sex differences became more obvious, hated my body while people kept telling me how I'm "blossoming" into a beautiful young woman>Mom told me I need to grow out of the enby phase>Hated seeing myself in the mirror daily>Kept making friends with guys but they all ended bc the guys always wanted to fuck me>Turn 20 next week>Have alienated everyone close to me bc I couldn't stand them treating me like a girlI try to act masculine and tough and people just treat it like I'm a quirky tomboy and they downplay my efforts and I can't fucking stand it. I want people to see me as a cool ephemeral being that has transcended gender and gender norms, but nothing I've tried has worked.
>>33702436
>>33702436Why is being a girl bad?Why can't you just be one? Why do you have to be "enby?" Are you a boring retard who wants to play pretend like a 5 year old girl the rest of your life? There are no "they them" parts. Once in a very great while a genetic freak accident will be born with some combination of parts and chromosomes, but that is not "default." If you take 10,000 babies, chances are 4999 are going to be boys with normal boy parts and 4999 will be girls with normal girl parts.
>>33702436YwnbamYou have no testicles, you have squeeky voice, you are the height i was in 4th grade.Men dont post faggoty girly pictures. Youll grow out of your enby phase when you get dick you like. Just make sure that you dont use birth control, that way your mom will be proud of you for having a kid. Instead of being disappointed in a spinster that spent her years trying her hardest to look like a short weak incompentant male.
>>33702467>Why is being a girl bad?It's not, I just don't feel like it's me.>There are no "they them" partsIDC about parts or whtvr, I just want to be me and do things my way and everyone acts like I'm crazy for it.>>33702476>You have no testiclesI have a jar of rat testicles on my shelf>you have squeeky voiceYeah but fuck you for saying it>you are the height i was in 4th gradeYou were 5'6" in 4th grade? I'm not as tall as the guys in my family but I'm taller than my mom. I don't believe a 4th grader would be that tall.>Youll grow out of your enby phase when you get dick you like.I'm asexual. Sex is a mechanism of control for the government to oppress people and keep them in eternal low wage positions because childcare takes too much time/money/attention for you to get independent of the existing system.>Men dont post faggoty girly pictures.What's gay or girly about Alastor? He's a serial killer demon who is asexual.
How the ego persists. OP, you sound so full of yourself. So self concerned. It's like you are the only thing you care about-- common in everyone who engages with gender bullshit and liberal politics. Just a play for power, to have control over someone else and how they percieve you. Just trying to tell others how they SHOULD view you rather than accepting what you are. Because you probably don't accept yourself for what you unconciously know to be true.Here's how it goes. You were a rebellious prepubescent, the age where teens rebel and try to carve out an identity. Your retarded mom, or probably lack of a dad being around, never stepped in to set proper boundaries for that behavior, and now you're so conceited and concerned about yourself (ego) and your validation in some form (this case, your "gender" and sexuality) you're looking for answers in the utter nonsense of alphabet people. Lost. Deluded. Many cases. Being indoctrinated might not be your fault but you have a duty to yourself to cut this shit out now.Solution? Get over yourself. Accept what you are and what you are not. The world is giving you feedback. Guy friends want to fuck you because you are a girl, your probably also-misled mom is telling you to get over it because you are a girl, and you are narcissistic about it to this degree because this is what females do and you are a girl. Behave more like what the world is showing you you are and you will be happier. You are unhappy because you keep pushing against things because of a misled belief. You likely have a different psychological issue unrelated to your ideas of gender and acting like gender is the answer is only gonna drag you deeper. You probably hate parts of yourself, physically or otherwise, and no amount of running from that or obscuring it through muh gender is going to help you. You are not some "transcendent" being, you are a foolish human like the rest of us. Chill your tits and come back down to earth.
>>33702749Ok, I'm going to say some things that the people in your life are too nice to say to you:It doesn't matter if you "don't feel" like a girl. You have a vagina, and breasts, and curves, and regardless of the debates around being a woman that makes you desirable to men. Men dedicate a lot of time to getting pussy, it not only feels good but reinforces their idea of being a man. To them, you being a "they/them" is just a silly roadblock on the pathway to sex. Is that fair? No, but life isn't fair. People don't care about what you say you are because most people don't care about anybody but themselves anyway. You also can't force other people to see you the way you want to be seen. You can not control another person's perspective of you, all you can do is accept who you are. And don't be a fucking retard, that photo of hazbin hotel blushing in pajamas is gay as fuck.
Bait used to be good
>>33702749Are you red-green colorblind by any chance?
>>33702749>I’m asexual. Sex is a… blah blah tumblr commie fag talkWow someone has watched every season of the handmaids tale havent we? A show made for MANLY MEN clearly.>Whats gay or girly about alastor?Bro you have to be blind to not see how effeminate he is especially in the OP image. Even without the image in the OP you can still see how girly he looks.You legit just need to be comfortable as a woman, I’m afraid. Real men don’t piss blood once a month or have wide hips or get friends easily as you. By the way do you even have any hobbies that men would typically have like history, math, tech? or is it all enby retardation like art, writing stories or thrifting? You aren’t a man, you’re a woman and you refuse to accept it.
>>33702901>>33702903One of you is saying I'm bad for being self absorbed, the other says everyone is self absorbed and that it's normal. I'm not even trying to be a man, I just want to exist free of gender norms and expectations. I get that y'all like gender norms because you benefit from them, but for me they just seem detrimental. And guys smell weird. The thought of being with a man is gross, I don't want someone smelly and sweaty squeezing up against me all the time. I don't like sex, I don't have to like something just because people say I should.>>33703354No? Why do you ask?>>33703439>By the way do you even have any hobbies that men would typically have like history, math, tech? or is it all enby retardation like art, writing stories or thrifting?I like tabletop games, sci-fi, I DIY as much as I can to save money so I'm kinda handy. Not that I need to justify myself for your examining, men and women can like whatever they want. But I do also like reading ao3 fics because they aren't trying to sell me stuff or indoctrinate me like most media.
>>33703539>exist free of gender norms>plays tabletop games, into “sci-fi”, and reads AO3Just admit you are a woman nigga KEK no man does this shit. The exception is DIY but you aren’t really specific so I imagine it’s like making a wooden shelf to hang your funko pops on or something.No matter which way you slice it you will always be female irl and on the internet.
>>33703576I fix stuff around the house. The dishwasher, the dryer, the towel rack, so on. I learned recipes for all my favorite food to save money on eating out. I learned how to fix my car since I don't want to ask my brother for help. I helped him get a 1964 Chevy truck restored and running. Idk why it all matters, men and women can do any of these things and it doesn't make any of them less or more of what they are. I'm an enby, I'll be an enby no matter how much or how little I do guy hobbies or girl hobbies, not that there's a real distinction.
>>33703612Don't lie, you just did stuff like changing the filters and twisting a screw back into place.
>>33704074I did that stuff but I did more too. It doesn't matter what kind of hobbies I have. You guys would still call me a girl. I get bothered about this by friends and family, but strangers don't bother me about it when I tell them I'm a guy. I wear a binder and a packer and they think I'm a kid if they don't clock me as being AFAB but I'm still valid. People don't have to fit the molds everyone tries to define them in. We can be whoever or whatever we want to be and it's just closeminded people stopping us.
>>33704497Anon, coming from another maladjusted 4chan rotted fem anon - give it up. Even the way you’re talking and emotionally appealing for reassurance and acceptance is feminine. It’s okay to be a woman y’know. Yeah, it kinda sucks to lose that feeling of boyish friendship, and puberty makes our body into something — different. The feeling of being lusted after is akin to being hunted. But it gets much easier once you have the chance to give in to it. Go meet a boy, have a crush, kiss him and hold hands and all that bullshit. It really is worth it.
>>33704552NO be a femcel for life, don’t ever give ugly moids any affection
yeah so the whole point of sexism and patriarchy is that you are a female. not that you "act like a girl". you can't identify out of misogyny. in other words, you can't convince people you hate you for being born with a vagina that you are not like the other people who were born with a vagina, because the only thing they care about, is that you were born with a vaginait is really that simple
>>33703539>I just want to exist free of gender norms and expectations.the norms and expectations are from society - you can't exist free of them, no one can.
>>33702436>I want people to see me as....the dissonance with what we are and what we want to be (or be perceived as) is probably one the biggest sources of suffering. Try to reduce the ego , is still big cope, but trust your anons
>>33703612Will you marry me? I will treat you like my princess and we can work on old cars together.
>>33704552>em dashholy fucking chatgpt post in the wild
>>33702436this is a better made bait than the usual we have around here but it's still a very obvious bait
>>33703612You are a woman and as you said, your hobbies don't change the fact that you're a woman>>33702436>i want people to see me as specialthere we have itYou don't need to follow "gender norms" but you do need to accept reality
>>33704901Is it really hurting anyone for me to live the way I want? Why does this offend people so much? I'm not running up into people's houses demanding they gender me one way or another, I just want to feel comfortable in my own personal space.
>>33704968Because you're asking people to change how they act to feed your ego.You're allowed to feel however you like. But so are others, and when you act "special", they have no obligation to play along. Insisting that they do only increases the likelihood that they're going to get annoyed with you.
>>33702436That's going to be very hard anon. You just need to bearded-circus-ladymaxxx to the point people stop seeing your femininity.
>>33702436Men don't care about that faggotry.Lift weights, have a couple of pills to enhance testosterone production and go in about your life with your interests. Ruminating about old shit is pointless. Everyone does it from time to time, letting past crap define you as a person is not a man thing.
>>33702749You don't feel like it's you? You have been yourself all this time, people have treated you for what you are so far, and you're still delusional in your head that you "can be" whatever fucking label you decide and keep grinding yourself to fit it.Can't you see your problem? You exist and are as you exist, but you can't get out of the childish headspace you created.Do you think every other kid chastises himself because they couldn't be an astronaut or a president? You think every college freshman dedicates their lives to spread utopian communism? You're an adult already, there's a tough world out there with no time to be entertained by "identity" bullshit. To society life is about how great a wealth gatherer you are. Existentially life is about how can you enjoy the time alive despite hardships. Identity fits nowhere in either.
Damn easy mode is just too easy for the likes of you so you have to make life harder for yourself with all this bullshit. I'm so glad you can afford to do that.
>>33702749>everyone acts like I'm crazy for itBecause you are crazy>I just want to be me and do things my wayYou can do that while being a girl. In fact, being a girl would be TRUER to yourself considering "enby" is a made up thing that doesn't actually exist or apply to any real human. You're actually denying yourself.
Tried it once. Was successful. People thought I was a gay dude for about a year
>>33702436>Kept making friends with guys but they all ended bc the guys always wanted to fuck meIt really must be so terrible having somebody you know and care about fall in love with you. If only you were just unloved and unwanted constantly, like a real man
. >>33702436>I want people to see me as a cool ephemeral being that has transcended gender and gender norms, but nothing I've tried has worked.>>33702749>I'm asexual. Sex is a mechanism of control for the government to oppress people and keep them in eternal low wage positions because childcare takes too much time/money/attention for you to get independent of the existing system.straight up self absorption and narcissism.OP, you sound like you haven't maintained any long-term friendships, regardless of their sex. You have to realize you can never and will never be able to force your expected identity on others. They are going to treat you as they will just as you will treat them. >I get that y'all like gender norms because you benefit from them, but for me they just seem detrimental.thats because you know shit-all about the world that a social science liberal arts fuck taught you, and you have a self sense of being above the fray. The first one can be fixed with more life exp, but the 2nd one can really fuck up any chance of relationships because of how it will lead to you treating others.>And guys smell weird. The thought of being with a man is gross, I don't want someone smelly and sweaty squeezing up against me all the time. I don't like sex, I don't have to like something just because people say I should.thats not how gender norms work, anyways. (such a childish view of a complicated matter) You don't have to like men, there's nothing fucking wrong with that, other than if you ever wanted to get pregnant, just because its a math problem. Other than that, nobody really gives a fuck who you like.
>I want people to see me as a cool ephemeral being that has transcended gender and gender norms, but nothing I've tried has worked. transcending gender norms by basing your whole life around them, a lot of self-awareness there bud, also I know you're probably just 16 and stupid but no one gives a fuck about you, don't live ur life trying to appear to others.
>>33702436cringe
>>33702749You do know that you can be a woman and not be feminine in the traditional sense. Don't try to be something just be you, if you want to wear pants wear them if not don't. People are going to judge you either way, so just take it with stride keep going on.
>>33702436>I want to be something I'm not>I want to dictate how other people treat meLife is not going to work out the way you want. You can't control the actions or perceptions of other people, nor can you change what you are on a fundamental level. You only have control over how you react.>, I just want to exist free of gender norms and expectationsUntenable and impossible. Short of living entirely outside of society itself.
>>33702436>2026>girls wants to be boys>boys wants to be girls
Do I need to start taking T to get people to respect my androgyny? Like idk what I'm supposed to do here. You're all telling me to give it up but this is who I am and who I've been since I was little. My biology is subject to my will, not the other way around.
>>33707397>My biology is subject to my will
>>33707397Ignores any sound advice in this thread and continues to dive deeper into delusion.
>>33707397Do you even lift weights?
>>33707406Laugh all you want. You probably gave up and let your body dictate things for you.>>33707589Why is it a delusion if I can see IRL the effects? I have smaller boobs than my mom and other relatives because my body listened to my mind and knows I'm an enby.>>33707590Yes, I have a pair of 5lb hand weights I use when I'm reading at the computer.
>>33707397society doesn't care though. you are so narcissistic. you can dress however you want, do whatever you want, ask people to call you whatever you want, but you cannot escape how society sees you and treats you.
>>33707806>5lb hand weightsfucking lol
>>33707806Get off the internet for a while, and just start not caring and being yourself, in a month from now, u will look back and feel like a complete schizo
>>33702436Well you owe your liberal mom a huge thank you for letting you be yourself if anything.
>>33702436You're a female and that's awesome. You can make people. Stop trying to shove God's gift up His holy ass. Be happy you're alive and get on with your fucking life. Every day is a gift.
>>33708025No, we all owe her mom a big fuck you for not telling her beautiful daughter that she's a girl and needs to stfu. Women like that are ruining the next generation.
>>33702436>I want people to see me as a cool ephemeral being that has transcended gender and gender normsThis is mental illness caused by too much screen time and parasocial media talking about your heckin identity and why you're so unique and special. Because you've made your identity the centerpiece of your worldview and philosophy, and now have nothing meaningful you are miserable for it.
>>33707810That last part is what I want to fix. So hypothetically I just accept I'm a girl. I accept how that means I'll fit into society. What then? When do I stop just rolling over and giving up the things that matter to me?>>33707814I use them for hours at a time, I'm not building for masc bulk I'm an enby. I want to stay androgynous.>>33708019I went on a 3 month internet detox except for what was essential to school and still felt the same way.>>33708025>>33708054I appreciate my mom for supporting me, it just hurts that it feels like her support ran out and she wants me to conform to society now.>>33708045Why does it matter in a cosmic scheme of things what one person does in relation to their gender in one tiny part of the world?>>33708077What do you suggest instead? Something more developed than "just be a girl" please. Like what does the life plan look like if I give up being an enby?
Jesus, imagine being this self obsessed.
>>33708192Why does everyone keep saying this? I only get to live one life, why can't I live it the way I want if I'm not hurting anyone? Why does it make me self obsessed if I want to live a certain way instead of the way people normally would? I legitimately don't understand why I'm supposed to be in the wrong for this.
>>33708208You aren't in the wrong. But you are mentally ill and need help
peter pan syndrome lookin' ass thread>>33708169you know if you want to be unique and special you should go develop some actual skills that make you unique and specialapplying a label to yourself is meaningless, you want the validation without the work>transcended gender and gender normslisten buddy you're 20 and haven't done shit with your life, you haven't transcended anything - and if you want to continue living the way you want, you need to accept that most people aren't going to accept you. society is made of people and we get along with a gentleman's handshake.you're young and your identity that you've adopted is the only thing you have. i get it. but one day, you'll realize that you've just been wearing a mask that you found on the road one day and never worked on whats within
>>33708208The issue here is you are contradicting yourself. You say you are not bothering anyone, but in your very first post you state you want people to see you as a certain way, so you in fact are bothering people.I'm not these other Anons, and I don't really care how you want to be, but just know that if you want to larp as some ~transcendant~ being you are going to have to deal with being alone, ironically, like a transcendant being.
>>33708169>What do you suggest instead?I suggest you get away from parasocial media and over-socialization (especially facebook, twitter, discord, et al) and discover who you are when everything is quiet instead of trying to prove to yourself and others who you '''really''' are. Leave your old life behind. Dedicate your time to things that make you healthy and pay you back -- exercise, diet, art, music, literature. Not because these things are good for you (that's a bonus) but because they keep you from being trapped inside your own skull out of retarded thought loops. Idle hands and all that. From there who you are reveals itself and you won't need to affix labels or justify anything.
>>33708208>why do people get upset when they dont respect my decision to smash my hands with hammers? don't they understand smashing my hands with hammers is just what i feel like doing? i'm not hurting anyone! i just want them to respect my desicion to smash my hands with hammers!
why is it so hard for people to accept reality. accept what you are. there's no shame in that. you'll never be your favorite hazbin hotel character, T or no T. a healthy sense of identity comes from reality and is grounded in circumstance. there's so much to say about this topic...for example, why is there not a corresponding trans-racial community, social phenomenon etc? there seems to be something 'special' about gender. it's a matter of capitalism and the 'cultural superstructure' it erects overtop normal reality. there are various social fictions to which people pay consciously or unconsciously pay homage constantly... at some point the basic distinction between man and woman is weaponized... in the past, a man or a woman was simply the name you gave to a particular kind of actualized being... but now, we turn the distinction inward and use it to describe potential being and other things as well... read tiqqun prelim materials to get a vague idea. but in the grand scheme of things this is part of the inversion of the relation between the social stage and the actors themselves that is tangential to the inversion of the relation between mankind and tools, specifically the power dynamic of mankind and tools, as proxies for productive power etc. read ivan illich tools for conviviality to get a general idea... i feel sorry for OP but i also see that she has literally no idea what's going on because her mind is basically an internalized simulated reality where her identity is what she wants to be rather than what she is, and because she's a retarded woman she can't figure out why this is happening or what to do about it. ultimately she'll troon out and her justification will always be 'this is just who i am' because she herself doesn't understand why she is the way she is.
>>33708376I swear I don't say this to be mean, but women know nothing about themselves or reality. They are nature incarnate and have almost no ability to steer or investigate themselves. Camile Paglia is 100% correct everything she says about women and men.
>>33708261A guy I know came over and brought some weed. We both popped edibles 20 minutes ago and I showed him this thread. We're watching Star Trek and he just kinda floated the idea that if gender doesn't matter, it shouldn't matter if I'm an enby or a guy or a girl and I guess it kind of makes sense when he put it like that but my emotion here is that if I say I'm not an enby and accept being a girl and I end up not being happy about it then if I try to go back to being an enby nobody will listen to me or believe me. Like they'll think I was just a trender when I really do feel enbycoded but it won't seem that way and nobody will respect my gender anymore.It'll be like I'm a she/they instead of a they/them and I'd rather stick with she/her than be mistaken for a she/they if I can't be a they/them and that makes me feel like I'm locked into a side I don't want to be in.
>>33710202what the fuck even is gender here? you talk like an alien
I really believe that women have had it SO easy, that they SEEK to make problems in their life where there are none. GET LOVE AND AFFECTION FROM OTHERS!! IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!! AS A GIRL YOU CAN DO THAT EASILY, LET GO OF ALL THE OTHER BULLSHIT!
>>33710202Nobody fucking cares, dude. Your gender is irrelevant to the world you live in. Bills have to be paid, relationship bloom and wither, and the emotion you feel is the sound of you trying to find your place in the world. I can guarantee you that the validation and fulfillment you seek lies not within whatever label or mask you put on, but from the fulfilling days ahead you'll have if you drop these delusions.The way you talk about being an enby is the way crazy astrology ladies talk about their signs and their destiny. Is that really the life you want to live? Your Identity is not a label or any image or any false symbol you've seen but the culmination of your actions and memories. If you've got time to smoke weed and ramble this stuff to strangers, I genuinely believe you need to look inside yourself and see if there are any other reasons that you feel invalidated as the way you do.
>>33710202sure you can be a she/they homeless faggot instead of a they/they homeless faggot roflmao
>>33710265Sorry I was high af. I don't want what little respect I do get for my enby identity to go away because I experimented with identifying with my birth assigned gender.>>33710291Why are you so misogynistic?>>33710313I'm still kinda high, but I guess I get what you mean. Like I need to have more of a goal with life than just my gender?I'm gonna professionally DM tabletop games like D&D. I already make $600 a week DM'ing for 3 different games and it lets me get my creative ideas out there in an interactive way so I feel like it really lets me evolve as a writer while supporting myself.
>>33702436> I try to act masculine and toughIt’s clearly just an act. Have you tried just being yourself?
>>33702436This is a terrible place to find answers to this problem. Try hormones and see how u feel. You sound like a transman in denial to me. If you dont like the T, u can just stop
>>33711824genderideology is people purposefully/unaware infantilize themselves. the same way the people taking surgery to look like cartoon characters>>33712146should they join discord group full of people trying to track each other "eggs"no, there is no just "stopping" hormones, they change you permanently.the same way you lie by saying puberty blockers are "reversible". yeah you can stop taking them, but that teenager doesn't get a full puberty, if their puberty was geneticaly supposed to stop at 19 it stops at 19 you don't catch up to those years you blocked it.
>>33711824Being an entertainer in a sense can bring some sense of vocation. Ultimately, you are who you choose to be - but don't be surprised if some people have problems with that. You're clearly not an adult yet, and that's fine. If you go your whole life seeking validation, you'll be easily lead astray.Have you tried writing about these things? Maybe putting pen to paper on a manuscript can help you sort out what you've got in your own head. Reframe it like a proper story.
