Gay man here. Been dating an incredible guy for about four months now. He's so sweet, charming, attentive, and he's sexy af. Today, I found his alt Twitter and Instagram page and it's... really sexy. The Twitter is pornographic (not vids/pics of him, just reposts), the Instagram is very sexy (pics of him), and all the text on both is pretty vulgar and I feel really shocked by it. I'm no prude, but as he gets introduced more and more into my life, I don't want my friends and family to find those pages.I honestly feel like these sexy pages are just kind of online personas and not the "real him," but some of the responses he makes to others is really slutty. I KNOW the real him and he's just not that. And he has some SFW but really horny pics. Now, obviously, I find it sexy as fuck but also it feels weird to me and I want to talk to him about it but don't know how. I also have a high sex drive, but because I'm a bit older than him, I guess I'm just a little more private about that sort of thing. I don't know. What should I do? These pages aren't SECRET, but also I don't think he knows that I know about them. I would rather they didn't exist, but is that controlling? Should we grow our relationship more until I can bring up something like that? Also, on this secret account, he posts things like "I'm so in love with my boyfriend <3<3<3" and "I have never been happier."So how do I approach this? Is it too much to ask him to be a little more conservative with his internet presence? Is it too early in our relationship to mention something like that? How do I go about doing so? Rather than be like "yo, take this down," what I want to say is "hey, this is sexy af but man... it gives me some insecurity when I see stuff you post. And I'm afraid of having to explain it to my family and friends, because I don't really know how to.">inb4 gays are sluts and degenerates, seek Christ
>>33725434Your concern seems to be that someone else will find them, but unless your family is insane that seems unlikely. I wouldn't worry about it
>>33725434>seek ChristPerhaps you should take your own advice.
>>33725507That's definitely half of it. My family is not insane, but they'll definitely find it pretty quickly. Like I said, it's not a SECRET. He tags his main sometimes and it's just kinda there on his page. I think it boils down to more he is a little more sexually liberal than I and my whole world is, and that scares me a little. Like, on a compatibility level. It excites me that he's so sexy but I feel conflicted. Also, one post I saw he made just 10 days before we started dating, he said "To say I'm ready for a relationship, fuck me, then ghost me is crazy" and that leads me to believe he was also hooking up probably more than I expected, too. Which is so hypocritical of me because I've hooked up plenty. Not some obscene level, but... fuck. I really think I could love this guy. But this feels like it could be an ethical/moral difference. I'd have to navigate that. The other half is that it makes me really insecure. The stuff he posts is hot af. HE is a 10/10. Like fitness model type (the OP photo is not him). And for me, he's hot as fuck. And I'm a 6/10 or a 7 on a good day. But I feel nothing but love and attraction from him... despite not looking like he guys he reposts and talks about online. In short... should I just lay off social media? It's kind of my world/job/career, so I'm on it a lot. I dunno. Thanks for letting me rant.
>>33725434you talk to him about it. Liek just ask stuff, why he does it, how he feels about it. Then you can tell him that you are scared about what others think, but without saying anything about that maybe he should deleted stuff or stop doing it. That part would be too soon. If it's not really hidden, as he is linking it with his main, then I don't see a need to wait for it. Him doing sexy stuff is also not even close with him doing hardcore gay porn, so I think there's not need to feel ashamed. Are you also a bit jelly though that he might get sexy dms?
>>33725603Talking about it feels scary to me, but I also know that to him, it's not a big deal. To me it feels like one, though. It's not so much I'm jealous of sexy DMs - I'm SURE he already gets though, even on his main. He's gorgeous and knows how to show that off. In fact, he's shown me sexy/flirty DMs he's gotten just so we can laugh at them together. It's more like... I'm very monogamous and, just, like, when you're in a relationship, certain things should be reserved for your partner and sexuality just feel like one of those things. The OTHER thing I didn't mention is that this is his very first romantic relationship ever. He's learning how to have one too, I think, so I want to give him as much grace as I can. It's only my 2nd ever, so I'm trying to also give myself grace.I'm also jealous of him a bit too, maybe. I wish I could be sexy like him. He has never made me feel insecure, but his sexiness is something I wish I could have. I used to be really obese and have lost 83lbs but in the mirror, even though I'm muscular, have some abs now, look pretty good most days, I still see the fat neckbeard and think "why would bf EVER want to be with me?" and then those socials exasperate the feeling.
>>33725637I've waited with that stuff that bothered me about my ex and it became just worse over time. If you can talk about it you'll feel also more connected later. Should be no issue. What do you think would happen if your family would see the account anyway?
>>33725708My family and I are very close and also pretty conservative. I think they would, one, worry, two be extremely judgmental to me and him and it would take a lot of peace from me, I'm afraid.
>>33725434>ohno people might find out I'm dating a whoreIt's your choice. Think with your shit-encrusted dick, or think with your brain. Also seek Christ, you damned degenerate.
>>33725434>>>/lgbt/
religious gay people are some of the most bipolar goddamn partners in the world. Go live among the cavemen away from the temptations of shellfish and mixed clothing fabrics, dipshit. Tell us how nice and wholesome Gawd is after that.
>>33725434Four months into a relationship isn't too soon to be thinking about where you're headed, and it isn't too soon to be honest about how you feel. Standard advice from a relationship counsellor is to use "I" statements, not "you" statements - so don't say "you do this", "you need to stop", say "I feel...", "I am concerned that...". Pitch it as you explaining how you feel about it, not as you making demands.
>>33725434You know that twirl effect can be unmade, right?
