Childhood of severe neglect and abuse6 years prisonWork for uncleMet beautiful girlShe is sweet and wonderfulShe is the only person who has ever touched me affectionatelyMove in with herI become a needy childBecause of my criminal past and social retardation her friends and family stop inviting her placesI destroy her social life, monopolize all her time, worry constantly that she will leave meWhen apart I panic that she'll be gone when I go homeWhen together I watch her face trying to tell if she still loves me or notI text cringey stuff like "Please don't leave me I'll do anything for you"I sulk like a puppy when she wants to do anything besides spend 100% of her free time with meShe continues to love me through all this cringe behaviorAll I do with my time is work, exercise, and hang out with my girlfriendSometimes she tries to gently pull away from me so that I can become more independent. I sulk and panic and act like a needy idiot.I am making her 100% responsible for all my emotional needsShe still loves meI feel like worshipping her as an angel or goddessI start feeling like her life would be better if I was deadwhen I told her how I was feeling she criedSo I start feeling like the only reason to stay alive is because it would make her sadShe is the only source of love and warmth I have ever knownI try 15 times to quit being so needyI have to learn how to stand on my own before I can be a good partner to herI broke up with her and moved out so I can learn to become a manShe promised she would wait for me and be celibateI know I might lose her by doing thisBut I know if things stay the same I will push her away for sureShe can get back her old social lifeI can learn to stand on my ownI can learn to become a real manThen I will go back to herThe good-I'm in great shape. Calm. Good self controlThe bad-I'm socially inept. Don't know how to talk to people. No friends. I'm stupid. Criminal record. Depend on my uncle for work.
>>33732083The problem isn't learning a skill, it is being massively insecure. You need to believe you are capable of love and end your incredibly insecure relationship behaviors (because you are right, that clingy shit will push her away). You might need therapy to get over your insecurity because it's hard to do on your own
>>33732083start going to therapy
>>33732083>Move in with her>I become a needy childFor the life of me I will never get why guys like you fully overcommit to the first random woman to ever be nice to them. Its just an initial learning experience in almost all cases, nothing more.>Then I will go back to herNo you won't and if she is in any way normal she will have moved on anyways.What you do is learn how to stop being a simp and sow your wild oats so you stop percieving any random old tit haver as being super special. Fix yourself, no woman will do it for you.
>>33732083All I can say is this, at the rate you're going with your mindset, it's not gonna end well. Your relationship is a ticking time bomb right now. I'd switch it up really quick before you come home and another mans in your bed. Forget her being gone. A man that doesn't cry like a baby bitch when his gf doesn't hold his hand. Don't you know saying shit like "Please don't leave me, I'll do anything for you" is like saying "I know I'ma baby bitch and you're outta my league please love me instead of leaving and being with someone who's actually worth your time." You might as well just say that bro. It's like you're doing everything perfectly wrong. Wake up one day, and don't text her or contact her until she reaches out to you first. When she texts good morning or something then text her. Let her lead, let her decide what you guys are gonna do and eat and watch and etc cause right now, you're the woman and she's the man. Like tryda find it in yourself to not be a needy fag for 2 seconds. Get your own place, get your own car, your own money and pay your own bills. That's how you be a man. Not living off someone with a vagina. When she's living off you, in your house, driving your car, eating your food, sleeping in your bed, then you can call the shots and be a needy, baby bitch. Until then, get right or get left. That's the name of the game.
>>33737075I didn't read the part where you moved out so don't be upset. I think that's the best thing you could've done. I think the best thing that could happen is for her to live with you. Don't be dependent upon her for anything other than being your gf. I think if you do everything else and make it to where she's depending on you for at least paying the bills or something then it'll equal out and won't seem like you need her for so much cause it'll look more like you actually need each other instead and it won't be so lopsided energetically.
