I have pretty much always been frustrated with my personality and temperament. I am a very cautious and risk averse person. I am also relatively quiet and I don't like to really "leak" a lot of information about myself. Like I am not about to blurt out what pisses me off to people I just met or something. I also dislike that I am generally calm. I have a hard time getting angry but if I ever do get angry, I feel like I'd go overboard.Is it worth trying to change my personality or am I just stuck how I am? I guess I don't see the value in actually being cautious and risk averse. I am a generally observant person but again, these are all traits that as a male, probably aren't all that helpful. Sometimes I wish I were more aggressive or more "act in the moment." but maybe this is just how I am. Is there any benefit of my personality though. Women obviously don't like men with this kind of personality. Its hard for me to make friends in general too. What I will say is that I do like that my personality allows me to not feel disrespected very easily because most of the time I just don't care. Never forget in high school a kid wanted my seat in the cafeteria and got angry when I didn't get up. My only thought in my head was "This kid was held back 2 years. Might be retarded." and I couldn't take him seriously because of that.
>>33753826>I have pretty much always been frustrated with my personality and temperament. I am a very cautious and risk averse person. I am also relatively quiet and I don't like to really "leak" a lot of information about myself>I have a hard time getting angry but if I ever do get angry, I feel like I'd go overboard.Trauma 100%And hey lots of stoic attractive men are always calm no matter the situation even if someone is trying to disrespect them, you can't be "too calm" as a man.
>>33753861>Trauma 100%Wait, I am traumatized? How? I don't think anything bad happened to me while growing up I think. Maybe. At least nothing I'd say was massively traumatic.
Ur post couldve been written by me OP.I think the trauma would be getting shut down at an early age when trying to express yourself. And you wont be able to remember because it as so long ago.
>>33753904Try looking into Sam Vaknins videos or books. I suspect you aren't fully aware of your circumstances. If something clicks, enjoy. If not, carry on.
Bump
>>33753826Look for safe ways to express anger. Try things out. Don't be attached to the outcome, but keep trying. Punching a pillow, heavy exercise, screaming in your car or something.
>>33753826I'm 32 and wish I wasn't so quiet and risk averse as a young adult. I was so quick to dismiss any activity or experience I didn't immediately think I'd be interested in. I never wanted to do anything except play video games and smoke weed with my friends.I think it partly stems from the fact that my dad is the cheapest man I've ever known. We never ever did anything together growing up because he never wanted to spend money. I guess I was afraid of wasting money on something I MIGHT not enjoy. Of course I never gave myself the opportunity to find out, I just assumed I wouldn't like something and never had those experiences.Obviously ones personality is more than one experience so there were other contributing factors to me being an uptight cunt, but I look back with extreme regret.You should try sharing more OP, it's hard at first but you'll never form meaningful connections by being a stone wall. Clearly you aren't happy with who you are and change doesn't happen overnight, and is likely to fundamentally change. You can however be better at managing who you are.
