>What is /htgwg/?How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of them even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.>What is /htgwg/ not?These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard today, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, give up, or insist there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!>How to ask for adviceContext is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question.>Resources and BooksWingman.live: https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach)"Models": https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html"No More Mr Niceguy": https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612Wingmam: https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmamDr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwqhttps://dokumen.pub/why-women-deserve-less-firstnbsped-1467978302-r-1917433.html(new suggestions with working links are welcome)REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.Prev: >>33763110
>>33789266>>33789283
>>33789678What are some turn-offs women find in men that are seldom talked about?
why are so many women gay now? its like every 3rd woman is a dyke.
>>33789678When woman says no to sex when does she really mean yes?
Question about eye contact...I have no problem holding eye contact, but when I do, I feel like I overdo it and intimidate people, so out of politeness I try to avoid eye contact and look like I'm autistic. If you had to pick one, is it better to do a bit too much eye contact or a bit too little?
>>33790207I do too much. I don't like restricting myself. If the other person locks eyes and I'm scared of their gaze I might look away which will make it even more awkward. But if I still look then I have to initiate a smile or some other nonverbal interaction with them. Which sometimes is nice and other times makes me seem needy for attention. Sometimes though the other person looks away or doesn't look, then it's okay. I got to see their behavior. If they are the avoidant type (or maybe they are just tired) or if they are the lock eyes and let's talk and party!! :D type of people. Eye contact is a very interesting thing, but my personal most important principle is to not limit myself. I won't shut myself off and look away because that's giving in to my fears. Looking is good. There is nothing wrong with looking.But you do need to emotionally regulate yourself which will come with time. Looking is emotionally powerful, yes, but it's also something that you have to normalize as - just looking. It's just looking. You aren't trying to intimidate and/or plead for attention with EVERY look, no, sometimes you just want to look because yeah. So yeah. I would say look until you get so comfortable with looking that it's not an emotional thing for you anymore. And it's just looking, which is a normal thing. You're welcome <3
It's Saturday night and I'm so horny and fired up I feel motivated to put myself out there wtf do I doI'm 28 autistic retard living in Sydney Australia
>>33789678Taller people, Have you gotten easy pussy because of your height?
>>33789719Noticed this too, it’s fucking insane. No kids for me I guess!>>33790812Vile
>>33789719this. i knew women are more likely to identify as bisexual but i didn't expect them to actually walk the walk until i went back to uni. so many normal attractive zoomer women are dating other women it's fucking the dating market up and a big reason why so many young men are single these days
>>337897191. Jewish media programming nonstop projecting the message that being lesbian is cooler and will make you happier than dating men2. Women who can no longer date chad coping after shes been pumped and dumped by him
>>33789719Men don't ask them out, so they cope.
>>33790892Two words in and I was already sold.
>>33790882Kek, are you a failed normie or something? Most these women are gay or "Chad only". Since you're a normie go make friends with girls to gain some insights on their behavior
>>33790967they're literally talking about their girlfriends in group conversations without me saying anything. my new housemate is gay and i can hear her lezzing out with her partner every week
>>33789719notice it too. Went to a book fair and there were so many dyke couples.>why are so many women gay now?rarely do you see a decent looking one.>>33790812I'm only 6 foot, but I recently went out with some people, and these 3 (short)girls were surrounding a 6'2 guy begging him not to go home. One of them(the whore) was basically creaming for him on the spot. Dude knew better and left.
>Are you brown and/or autistic?This should be the first question anyone asks before giving out advice.
dont be a suck ass loser>>33789715listening, talking, being friendly
i have a thin dick how do i cope
How tf do I meet people in college??My friends don’t like going out and it’s hard convincing them to do anything. Plus they are already in relationships. No one also asks me if they wanna go out because I’m a loser. What’s my best bet
>>33791342Start winning
>>33791342im in the same boat. Im 26 and I will transfer to university soon, any ideas?
>>33791342>>33791396I was such a loner in university until I joined the *major* club.Make small tall with your classmates before and after classjoin sports groupsGo to school-wide eventsYou have so many opportunities compared to a wagey. Do not blow this.
>>33791378What does this mean?
>>33791433Im a wagie and in school
>>33791433I’m not really a loner, I have friends. I’m in some organizations on campus. I met great friends from those orgs and i’ve had fun. When it comes to meeting women I’ve never had a connection like that spark. Do you think it’s just a luck thing?
>>33791433Absolutely thisI have a girl coming over to my place in 1 hour and we already agreed on having sex soon (probably not today though because she's on her period) Felt like finding a gem stone because she barely has any social media, was flirting heavily with me etc. Met her in a sports course and afterwards met randomly in a pub where she was flirting with me like no other girl did before...Her body looks kinda like pic related, only with curly hair and her boobs are bit small
>30>had my first date, lunch and then she came to my place to watch a movie>had my arm around her the whole time but didn't initiate furtherI think she liked me because she gave me a kiss when she left.wtf do I do now? Do I ask her to come watch another movie? I have no idea what to do with woman.
>>33790903women will really rather shave they heads and buy a subaru than just ask a guy out
>>33791539Go with the flow and kiss her again when it feels right Girls mostly give subtle signs they want to escalate things, if they are good at communicating they'll let you know you can go further than kissing Create a cozy atmosphere, enjoy being together and don't think too much
Okay, give me the whole guide on how to get a gf. Not generic shit like "bee urself" or "go out" because that's surface level retardation. I've been myself; I've gone outside. I need the absolute most retard breadcrumb guide.>how should I look>how should I talk to women>what areas are good for first dates>what am I expected to talk about with her>how fast am I supposed to move along the relationship
>>33789678all the womens in here, would you date a boy with no jaw or chin
>take a walk>see girls with huge tits>go to actual places trying to socialize>all girls are flat chestedwtf I have zero luck?
are you suppused to kiss the bottom or top lip when you make out as a dude
Reminder that she expects you to hit on her.Beautiful women don't fuck cowards.
>>33791961I too have become fixated on huge tiddies anon. I don't see them often but I'm captivated every time.I've had sex with a handful of women but never one with huge tits, the biggest I've been with have been like c cups I think. I believe I simply must experience comically huge F or G cups before I die, it simply isn't fair otherwise.
Has anyone tried wingman ai? Does it actually give good advice on talking to girls? I tried chatgpt and it was giving me the corniest gayest lines ive ever seen>>33789678
>>33792011theres so many girls on the train that i see that i think might be reciprcating interest but i dont wanna come off like a crepp nowdays its sketch, so i just hope they ask me which is like 1 in a million chance
>>33792035share>>33792023escorts
>>33792039>so i just hope they ask mesmile nigga, what the fuck.if they smile back then do a 'sup' nod or something.
>>33792053>smilethats fine>sup nodlmao pretty sure these college girls are shy as fuck i feel that would overwhelm them, that still wouldnt make them come over to me
Asked in /atoga/ and I figured I'd ask here as well.I've noticed that there is a racial hierarchy when it comes to dating in Canada or at least where I am. I'm a 26 year old WMAF produced wasian. How fucked am I?Pic related is just self depreciating humor.
>>33789678My parents are asking me to get an arranged marriage and are searching for girls for me. Should I go through with that or search for girls on my own T. Middle eastern
>>33792115Dude just take what they give you. you have no idea how much i wish my parents would do that for me
>>33792104Height?
>>33792117Where are you from? I thought Christian’s and Mormons still did that stuff, or at least networked with moms finding girls for their sons
>>33792123I think I'm 5'5-5'6. I know I'm not 5'10 so I never bothered to measure myself.
>>33792142LOL if only. Im from America, that stopped a long time before I was born
>>33792142>>33792115Oh sorry, I mixed up my wording, I meant to say match making, not arranged
>>33792150Ah, to be honest thats pretty brutal, even if you have a good face. You need to network snd find some communities to have a chance, or maybe geomax
>>33792152But why? That shit makes so much sense, it cuts a lot of the bullshit with dating in general and “situashion ships”
>>33792165I figured that would be the case. >geomaxNever heard of that term. What is it?
>>33792023>israeliThe khazar milkers meme is just real. A bunch of jewish students moved here near my area in Portugal, and the girl are all stacked as well. Locals girls have a ration of probably 1/10 women have big tits (maybe 1/20), but these jews are like 9/10.
>>33789678Hey /htgwg/. Now that I have money again, I want to know some good ways to find singles meetups in my area. I tried looking stuff up in my area using an LLM and using the Meetup app, but I wanted to know if you guys knew of even better ways, like maybe some specific site for singles meetups or whatever.
>>33792177Move to different country, like the Philippines or something where there’s less competition. What kind of Asian are you? Maybe go to your home country
I feel like I'm too mentally fucked up for anyone to really like me.
>>33792168I agree, I tried to convince my parents but they refused so now im here trying to fix a problem I shouldnt have.
>>33792079>that would overwhelm themthat's fine, nothing you do would make them approach you anyways so just do it.
>>33792265Damn that sucks to hear anon, I wish you the best
>>33792189I would die for Israel if it meant getting to suck on top middles titties all night before
Young woman I'm into is showing signs of losing interest. I think I fucked it up. It's okay at least I dated and lost my virginity before. I kind of figured this was happening.
>>33791634You should probably read these threads in detail to glean some info. It really does come down to being yourself and going out and talking to people but the nuances are too numerous to just rattle off for some idiot >>33791972I prefer the bottom but it doesnt really matter as long as the moment is hot
>>337908126'5might be the midwest but ladies here love shortkings. women I have been with said they dont like height
Best ways to meet women online?>dating apps (Hinge, Tinder, Bumble, etc.)>Discord servers for gaming // interests>R*ddit subs for interests // hobbiesI've only used dating apps, but I've heard of people using the others with some luck. Any I'm missing? Any personal stories?
I tried doing nofap to be more confident in approaching women but now I feel like a horny creep there is this cute chick studying near me in the library and I can’t stop staring at her tits and arms
I'm finally repeatedly getting positive experiences with women Wagmi bros
>>33793205dating apps are all owned by one corporation that keeps you on them for as long as they can milk you for money
>>33793456What kind of positive experiences?
>>33789678Hey how come the post by that one autistic wannabe PUA got removed from the resources section? It was good shit.And how come Dr. NerdLove is still on there, that faggot is literally the least useful dork around when it comes to getting women, especially for guys here.
>>33793586I think the first guy was "Kill Your Inner Loser" (I agree he had some good stuff). I also think Dr. NerdLove had a sexual harassment case in 2017 iirc.
>>33793586Which one was the "autistic wannabe PUA"?
Girls have taught me to treat them badlyThe other day, a girl did not respond to my message asking her if she was on the way to our date, after twenty minutes I was like this bitch is going to flakeSo i just ditched her and hung out with friendsShe supposedly had her phone die, and took a taxi to meet me and got there 30 minutes late to the proposed meeting spot.And she asked me where I wasi told her the truth that I was with friends, didn't think she'd actually go after being unresponsiveAnd she flipped the fuck outWhen I type it out it makes me look justifiedbut in the moment I should have waited?
>>33793395I tried this and while the horny creep thing is definitely a risk, I think the strategy is a net benefit overall. Just keep it in check and channel it towards talking to her and being charismatic instead of oggling.
>>33793845Did you message her saying you werent going to wait around? Or did you just bounce? Phone dying is a dubious excuse even if it is plausible... Idk theres a hundred things she could've done differently to not be 30 minutes late so by that alone she holds most of the blame here.
>>33789678>be at cafe for smoko>see cute girl waiting to order>i already ordered and just waiting for them to package my stuff>we make eye contact>she runs out the door and up some stairsHow can i improve my chances for next time?
>>33793205I got a decent amount of dates 10 years ago in dating apps, problem was I was to cringe to make it past 1 or 2 dates. Now like the other poster said its to keep you there for the longest amount of time so its shit. The best way I found to use it was to swipe left on most everyone, if its someone you recognize/know swipe left and hit on them in person and delete the app if they say yes. I got one date with method this a few years ago.
>>33791471>Do you think it’s just a luck thing?Probably, but not entirely Go life a life you like, look good, smell good, feel good and have that radiate from youThat way chances are higher some girl will fall for you Even better if you don't go for the things I've mentioned only because of girls, but because you enjoy life>>33793575I literally had the most amazing date yesterday, >Invited her over to my place>heavy making out shortly after entering my room>Made some tasty pizza>Return to my room >She starts undressing me and herself>See that she wears sexy af black lingerie >was like experiencing porn irl>Told me she likes how I touch her>She gave me goosebumps from touching my dickOk you can imagine what happened the remaining evening HOLY SHIIIIIT Don't mean to brag but I was also repeatedly in the >tfw no gf phase recently If you read this, it's never over, just be patient and life a good life
Is it a bad idea to ask out girls that belong to the same, loose social circle, and possibly are acquaintances at worst, like a small college? Could it ruin your ‘reputation’ if it seems as if you ask out every girl? Please be patient with my autism. Asp, through word of mouth, I’ve heard girls have been talking about me in group chats, I believe they may have been tinder girls with overlapping social circles in multiple unis. I don’t know the specifics of what has been spread about me but for context I’m very high inhib and play it very safe when it comes to interacting with women so I highly doubt it’s anything related to me behaving creepily and whatnot.
>>33795121>Asp = Also*
>>33794292It’s ridiculous I just went to the gym and saw a brown girl with a FAT toned ass isn’t tight shorts and popped a boner in the middle of my rows and I ran to the bathroom until it went away and then my nose started bleeding
>>33795121No, because that's typically how most relationships between men and women transpire. Through friends, acquaintances, work, school, etc. Some even start off as roommates, proximity and getting to know one another is how it usually goes.
>>33793691>>33793691Nah, I forget what the blog was called but it was how a dude who spent like 15 years with no sex and then decided to start fucking around in his mid-30s and was getting a surprisingly large amount of young, hot ass. Think it'd be pretty motivating to a decent amount of anons here who are in their 30s and feeling glum about their prospects.
>>33795218It's possible, I think
How can I fuck a young girl?I'm 28 and would just like to fuck a tight little barely legal girl ONCE
>>33795075>Don't mean to brag but I was also repeatedly in the tfw no gf phase recentlySo how did you snap out of it? Or was it just suddenly getting lucky because that doesn't help. There are anons here that have been trying for a decade to get their lucky break and all that's happening is them getting older.
>>33795218bump for interest
>>33793690>"Kill Your Inner Loser"He's OK but I dislike his "oh I was just like you guys, a poor KHHV incel who didn't start getting laid until his late 30s" shtick when he literally admits in a few of his videos that he was quite popular at school, first had sex at like 20 with a super hot coworker from his retail job, then had two long-term girlfriends whom he cheated on a lot with random hookups and every now and then he slips up and mentions that he had quite a few friends and a decent social circle during the time that he pretends he was a depressed loner. It really makes a lot of his "just be honest" advice ring hollow when he's so dishonest about his own dating life to make himself seem more "relatable" to the guys who read his stuff.>I also think Dr. NerdLove had a sexual harassment case in 2017 iirc.NL literally just took basic red pill dating advice from the 2000s and watered it down to be more palatable to feminists. Not really surprised that a male feminist ended up being a fucking creep.
>>33795359first off you have to be so pissed about being single and getting no women that you're willing to change.. anything for that matterin my case I grew my hair out longer, got some new clothes and most importantly I went to therapy to fix my self-esteem (yes I know therapy feels like a meme sometimes and it also felt frustrating at times) my main point was fixing my tendencies to resignate from life (most shut-ins or incels experience a negative feedback-loop which gives them no possibilities to gain positive experiences in life if they only remain alone and don't go out)after that I just took every opportunity I could get to hang out with people or to go to parties / events / sports courses in my city or college.I saw a video some time ago which basically broke down the chances of finding a gf or getting girls to three factors: exposure (meaning getting to know people and going out), social skills (the way you talk, how you present yourself, if you're fun to be around) and lastly your looks (obviously)I steadily tried increasing my levels in these areas and apparently it worked.don't expect immediate results, its a long run and you can't allow yourself to give up if you wanna change,but it will be worth it getting female friends is also beneficial, I told my date yesterday that I also have some female friends and she literally said thats a huge green flag (not only because of that, but you can use female friends as practice to be more secure with women
>>33795359also worth mentioning that luck also plays a role I see it kinda like going to the casino (I don't gamble btw) but everytime you meet new girls the dice gets rolled and only then you'll see your chances yesterdays girl I met during a sports course where we initially didn't have much contact with, she didnt catch my attention first. had a bit of small talk here and there on our way home with some other guys but thats ithowever there were a few parties organized by my university some days ago where I randomly met her and we had a conversation where she was flirting HEAVILY with me, wanted to dance with me and was in general just by my side nearly all the time then some other stuff happened and we agreed to have a date at my place for that to happen I was at the right place at at the right time mind you I also tried dating apps in the past year with mixed results: bumble was total dogshit but I was surprised about how many likes and matches I got on Hinge, there however most chats never really took off and I also didn't really care about it
>>33795867I work on my looks by getting fit and cleaning up my diet so there’s that. Not shredded but I’m in better shape than I used to be. I could probably get better clothes though. My social skills are adequate. I’m not a smooth talker but I can hold an OK conversation. Exposure is the main issue. I try to participate in social activities and go to things like festivals, concerts and conventions but it ends up with me just wandering around alone which isn’t very fun. At this point the hottest girls I see on a semi-regular basis are at the gym.And I can assure you that I’m pissed enough. I’ve been at this for a decade and have seen guys that haven’t put in even half the effort I have get results. I don’t think I can have any more rage about this than I currently do.
>>33795218Oh, I think I remember which one you mean. I remember reading it. Is there a site that archives /adv/ threads? We might be able to find it that way, otherwise I'm not sure.
>>33792199pls respond guys ;_;
>>33793203Same. Maybe it's different on the coast but here in Iowa I've had quite a few women interested in me, and I'm only 5'6.
>>33790812I've never had pussy because I'm autistic, but the few times that I've talked with hot girls they always worked height into the conversation somehow, whether it's them asking me directly how tall I am and then getting excited when my number is bigger than their number, or this one girl telling me about how "her friend" was really into tall guys. It's not discussed enough, but height is the male equivalent of bust size for women, it's usually not gonna be the deciding factor whether someone will sleep with you but if you're talking to a slut then it will be.>>33789719Their standards have become so high that there aren't enough polygamous chads that work for their new high standards to go around. And the few chads that meet their standards get so much pussy that they don't feel the need to be good in bed (i.e. they just pump and dump instead of doing foreplay and whatnot), so it's either have bad sex forever or lez out.
>Go on date with woman from Tinder>Non-stop conversation>We have a lot in common>She laughed at my jokes and liked my flirting>Touch her plenty>Kiss at the end>Mentioned a second date>Ghosted and never hear from her againGenuinely don't know anymore. I feel like every time I try to fix a mistake I just end up in the exact same position. I can't do these fucking apps anymore.
>>33796083The 3rd or 5th option is better than you.Simple as.
>>33795951>I work on my looks by getting fit and cleaning up my diet so there’s that. Not shredded but I’m in better shape than I used to be.good, keep it that way>My social skills are adequate. I’m not a smooth talker but I can hold an OK conversation.try being cocky and having fun, learn how to flirt, try teasing others (not just girls) -> just recently learned this can be quite fun >I try to participate in social activities and go to things like festivals, concerts and conventions>it ends up with me just wandering around alone which isn’t very fun.thats your biggest problem right now and the one you should focus on the most I helped in organizing and running a few parties in my university and could expand my social circle massively -> I got to know the DJs, Barkeepers, bouncers etc... I think thats a massive social proof for others and during the last parties I always met some people I know and could have a small chat withI never cold approach btw I did this without a big plan in mind btw, I just saw some opportunities here and there and used them >At this point the hottest girls I see on a semi-regular basis are at the gym.most girls don't like being cold-approached, even my date from yesterday told me about that and that it happened to her a few times -> she always thought it was weird
>>33796083dont rely solely on dating apps for meeting women I also use them but I mostly just shit-talk the girls over there, in a friendly way of course
>>33796083unlucky: there was a better option among the men she's messaging.your routine seems to work, it's a numbers game now. keep at it>We have a lot in commondon't read too much into it. if you find yourself getting attached too quickly, it may even be counterproductive to look for women who have similar background/taste as you
>>33796083A lot of chicks are just looking to smash and get annoyed if you don’t take it there. If you wanted more than meaningless sex, then you don’t want to be with those girls anyways, so you shouldn’t feel like you missed out on anything.
>>33795132If you have a pump going you would be directing blood away from your punishment. You werent actually working out.
Is there any way to get a gf while also adhering to a strict schedule?I sleep from 10pm - 4:30am and am starting intemittent fasting. This seems to rule out food and a lot of night time events. Any advice on this? I am really having a lot of fun with work so I know what my choice is if the answer is no.
>>33796336You need a girlfriend you can balance things out with not one who demands things out of you.
I'm pretty good at this whole game thing again, but I feel like I should be even better and it's driving me insane. Specifically, I will approach girls and crush it, but they're not the girls I want and that's the whole paradox of this thing. At a certain point, once you have the mechanics down, once you have some charisma, the battle is almost exclusively waged in your own head against yourself. Here's the textbook example of what I'm saying/what my issue is: There's a really cute girl (G1) that I'm attracted to at the gym. There was another cute girl (G2), perfectly acceptable and I'm picky. I just casually started bantering with G2 and as the conversation went on she started rubbing my arm and being really flirtatious. Just a great interaction, but she isn't what I have my sights set on.So G1 shows up and she is throwing off so many approach signals that if it was any clearer she wanted me to talk to her she would have been staring at me in the eyes and smiling and quite frankly, she may have even done that if I wasn't deliberately trying to ignore her. So I get in gear mentally, I draft a few openers, and I even start smiling at the shit I'm about to get myself into...and then I just don't act. With one girl, I may as well have been God mode and the other, I may as well have been a novice pissing himself on stage. I want to get rid of that weird ass "stage fright" and I know this is a thing a lot of guys deal with, in some cases way more severely where they don't approach anyone. I know it's "approach anxiety" and the 3 second rule and all of that, but I want to destroy this shit even more deeply than tricks. I want to actually shift my frame/identity/consistent way of being such that to freeze like that is laughably unthinkable.If I can pull that off, I know my life can probably double in happiness/fulfillment. I just don't know how to go into my mind and start rewiring shit like that. Mechanics aren't my problem at this point though.
>>33796575If I have to guess at how to fix it, it's broadly:1. Get the fuck out of your own head. Think less, while staying present. Easier said than done.2. A bit more of a long shot, but NLP for inducing states of mind (neurolinguistic programming).Back when my really good friend/wing and I were coming up, we used NLP quite a bit, but mostly as parlor tricks. My reservation with that though is that part of me is like "are you really going to start diving into that shit again?" It's practically magic tricks and I'm at a point in life where I'm actually pretty well established and successful. I don't feel like I should NEED to lean on that and dedicate resources that I could just be using for my business and things like that. But then again, another part of me is like "okay, well then keep getting the results you're getting." Maybe it's just medicine I don't want to swallow and I need to get back into it. I'm not sure.
>>33796429Good point Zach but it is the aquisition of such a girl that worries me.
>>33796632>see cute girl>ask girl outIt’s not rocket science.
>>33796617Please explain NLP. When I googled this shit it gave me a bunch of extremely long think pieces and videos.
>>33796636Yeah, I suppose that's true and I just need to keep at it.I guess I am just a coward and have been relying on dating apps for far too long.I was out with a friend and a girl sitting alone at a table at a bar smiled at me and looked down. I took this to mean that she wae interested but then that is when the "who am I kidding?" feelings took over.
>>33796637NLP is a scummy way of using certain words in order to sort of subconsciously program the other person into being attracted to you.
>>33796648>but then that is when the "who am I kidding?" feelings took over.Yeah, you’ve just got to get yourself a healthy level of “fuck it” in you.
>>33793203>6'5>My past girlfriends says they don't like my height Tallfags really are insufferable
>>33796637It's basically just a type of hypnosis. You've almost certainly heard of something like "affirmations" before? NLP is like that but with more parts attached. It's basically just a system for attempting to hack your own psychology. The idea of using music to amp people up who are going to fight has ties to the concepts of NLP for example. The idea of a pre-game ritual for athletes is related to NLP.>>33796649People have claimed to use it for this before and maybe they've managed to be successful with it in that regard, but at least when my buddy and I were using it, it didn't seem to have that sort of power. Of course we weren't exactly experts, but it never struck me as legitimate Jedi magic. It was always a way to amp ourselves up or as a parlor trick to fill "dead air" in a conversation/lead into a conversation about some goofy shit that a chick would be into.
I am really struggling to figure out what the hell dating app's endgame is. These things used to match me with hundreds of women 6-7 years ago, now they're dead silent. This can't be profitable. The idea that "if the apps got people into relationships its two less users" is midwit IQ business acumen. People turn 18 every day. People leave relationships every day.I went from fucking a girl every other week to 0 matches, I can only imagine how you ugly people are doing with OLD. Being a retard myself, I haven't figured out what game these apps are playing... very strange stuff.
>>33796791They're conceptually like video games that use engagement optimization matchmaking. The goal isn't for you to have a good time. It's to keep you queueing. Most people agree the systems suck, but they're kept afloat by the addicts and the simple fact there aren't really alternatives available. It's the same idea as casinos teasing you with the big win. Some people can walk away, others can't.The fear people have of meeting in public is the target emotion the dating apps prey on and so ultimately you and everyone else are 'queueing' to avoid having to approach people in public. That's the REAL service it's providing. You might quit the apps, but if you don't ever get the balls or skills to approach a person and have a conversation or network and meet people that way, you will always fall back to the app which is waiting to provide you with the alternative to that discomfort.
>>33796658any guidance on how to achieve this? Preferably other than alcohol.
>>33796871There’s not going to be a way to think your way into it. You’ve just got to do it. Like at the bar for example, you can mimic what is often shown in movies: take a big gulp of your drink, slap both hands on the table, push yourself to your feet and literally take one step that direction. After that, just don’t talk yourself out of it.
>>33796822>The goal isn't for you to have a good time. It's to keep you queueingI've thought this too, but the problem is that if you never win you just log off.I don't get it.
>>33790812im extremely tall but im also a sperg so no gooch 4 me
>>33796901cont…it’s the same mentality that gets you to jump into a cold swimming pool. You know the feeling, where at some point you know that you can’t think you’re way in, you just say fuck it and jump. Sure it’s cold, but not as bad as you feared.
>>33796761>>33796649Well could you please provide some examples and explain this a little clearer because all I am getting is a bunch of guys with half unbuttoned shirts talking for over an hour.
>>33796901>>33796920I am beginning to understand. What is your personal method or mantra when doing this? What was your learning curve like?
>>33796946You can literally say out loud to yourself “fuck it”, take a step that direction, and then let your feet carry you.
>>33796904The thing is...do you eventually come back? I think most do. I think that's also why a lot of people feel so fucked up these days. The problem is social media in general, but with those apps you can really map the process of how people can just be filled with hopelessness and despair.1. Use the app.2. Become disillusioned with the app.3. Declare "I will meet women in public!"4. Realize that requires a whole set of different skills, beliefs, and priorities than what the app provided.5. Feel hopeless.6. The app whispers to you like an old friend.7. Back to the app.8. Become disillusioned...9. Repeat the process with each cycle through making you feel more and more existentially fucked.It's made even worse by the fact that it's really easy to adopt a belief of "everyone uses the app so it's pointless to meet people outside of the app..." which only makes the already uncomfortable process of meeting people in person way more uncomfortable and gives you a convenient psychological "out" by just throwing up your hands and going back to the app.
>>33796972Wouldn't the best thing to do is have the apps as backup while practicing cold approaches?
>>33796972>The thing is...do you eventually come back? I think most do. Yeah, I do but its less than 24 hours. I let the visibility boost wear off, see 0 matches. Delete, repeat. I never do the "I will meet women in public!" phase, though. I simply will not engage in that anymore. I'm just at a point where I'm trying to reconcile being single for the rest of my life. I don't even want a girlfriend, I just want sex.
>>33796991>cold approachessry m8, unless you are a total chad this will be a massive waste of time. I'm not saying you shouldn't do it, but I wouldn't expect getting a girlfriend or hooking up with a gal if that's what you're after.if you need to overcome social anxiety or something, then do it
>>33796991Sure, in theory - if you can manage to not let it fuck with you or become overly reliant on it. I think in practice, most people will simply settle into the easiest path and end up saying "fuck it, I'll just use the app..." Sometimes "burning the boats" as they say can work wonders. I just haven't seen any real incredible results from anyone on the apps to justify their use while I've seen countless from real world meet ups. There is of course a proper way to use the apps, but I've just seen either outright addiction to them with no meaningful results or guys that get results, but they're way beneath their caliber. I have tons of examples of this such that the apps legitimately make zero sense to me other than as a safety blanket to protect a person from taking the risk (which isn't even really real 99% of the time) in a cold approach.
>>33797018but i'm not a chad and I got a girls number at a bar. Is this some crab bucket shit native to these threads? I am new here.
>>33796946NTA but I find it helps to remember some of the most stressful things you made your way out of, and compare the relatively simple act of socialization to that. For me, it was the knowledge that I endured running a small town business by myself during the pandemic while the old people in the town actively talked shit about me over relatively minor slights. Two years of hell before declaring bankruptcy, which itself was massively stressful since it was my first time. After going through all that and still finding my feet on the other side, the act of talking to a woman feels trivial in comparison. I'm sure you have SOMETHING in your life that can compare, some hell you endured and survived despite the pain it brought you.
>>33797078>I just haven't seen any real incredible results from anyone on the apps to justify their useI mean I've gotten seven gfs from it and countless hook-ups, they just seem to have gotten nerfed lately. But besides that I just don't think the girls I want to meet are on there.>while I've seen countless from real world meet upsWell truthfully I just want things to feel more real in general instead of swiping a screen
>>33797101This is excellent advice and it speaks to me because during the approach my mind kept drifting to the time I had a loaded gun pointed at me or being stabbed and I thought that this was strange but I figured it was just my brain looking for a comparable level of anxiety and adrenaline in my lived experiences. It did help.
full of normshit advice this time aroundif youre a jaded cunt like me just ignore everythingfor some reason chicks find you interesting when you arent peacocking yourselfthis eventually means you start "shining through" to them when you eventually get a life thats not centered around getting hoe pussy
>>33797157>https://youtu.be/_xhJ3nQnlp8?si=UxBCRdHFZ8gqVKlo
fucked milf so hard i think she wants a relationship now.how do i juggle milf on the side while my gf is preggo and making sure neither find out so i can still get some pussy while gf recovers from giving birth?ps living in town with less than 20k population. might run into milf's friends at the grocery store...
>>33796229>organising and running a few parties at universityYeah no, sorry man but all of that shit genuinely feels like putting in outsized effort for maybe getting the results I want, I’m not some life of the party guy and know I can’t fit that mould. I’ll try dating apps a bit more even though I’ve never gotten any results from them and then probably just quit if it still doesn't work in a few years.>most girls don’t like cold approachNever thought the gym was a cold approach situation DESU since I’ve seen the people there repeatedly enough to be on decent terms with them. Anyway not like I have many other options.
What can I read/watch/do to get better at talking with complete strangers? Like when I just meet a person and I know nothing about her, I dont know what to Talk about. Ive tried the wingman ai too but his suggestions sound weird, maybe because im kinda autistic idk
>>33796791>>33796822I think this is why hinge works the best for most people, because of someone likes you they show you up front and let you deliberately match or pass on that person, as opposed to this lootbox shit that tinder and bumble do.
>>33797112>I just don't think the girls I want to meet are on there.It entirely depends on what you want, yeah. Like girls <25 who are on these apps are normally going to be there to fool around and look for low commitment situations. Irl girls in this age range who want a long term thing would be searching in their real world friend groups or school or something sicne they have that network to fall back on. When you get to girls in their late 20s and into 30s you start to see a lot of the ones who missed the LTR boat early on andawho (just like men) struggle to find people to connect with irl, so theyre driven to apps. These arent to be confused with the other bundle of 30-something YO women who fit into the "ready to settle down now" meme where they want someone to take care of their baby daddy's kid. Normally you can tell these two demographics apart very easily.But yeah, if you arent looking for anyone meeting any of these archetypes then apps definitely wont do you a lot of favors.
>>33796575this is the law of lifethe girl you get is the one you can have 10 ofthe only way to get the G1 girl is to have 5 potential G1 girls all competing for your interest
>>33796972I think the best use of your time to meet women is to focus on your career or hobbyBut like completely dedicate yourself to itGo to events for it, meet new people through it and eventually you will create the life that naturally attracts the girl that likes youBut never stop the dating apps.If you're hellbent on dating apps you should>regularly hire photographers each season for fresh pictures>have a niche or figure out your strengths and showcase themand cold approaching is a valuable skill in life.which should be worked on anyway, if it's not natural to you. It gets really fun actuallyLike going out 1 hr 3x a week would help boost your confidence
>>33798217what are some good places to cold approach
>>33798556the nearest city center, where there's restaurants and shops and people walk aroundshopping mallsparkstourist locations
>>33797712I'm just looking for someone that sees me as a person instead of an income or stepfather (even in the pejorative sense)
>>33795253bump
>>33798697I do not condone this behavior but an obvious start would probably be some backwater town or a foreign country where that is more normalised.
I accidentally came on to strong on a girl I've been hooking up with since August.Recently we've been ghosting each other but last Sunday I showed up to her birthday party and made out with her. We chatted a bit and she sounded mad about me ghosting her.Then Monday I sent an apology text to reassure her that I liked her, but I overcompensated in this text and came on too strong and emotionally invested. She then ghosted me for a week then replied back today saying she isn't looking for a relationship, but "fun flirty friendship".The bottom line is I don't really want a serious long term relationship with this girl, I wanna just keep hanging out and having sex with her. But I don't know how to tow that line and communicate that to her clearly. It seems she has the idea that I'm more invested than she is which is the opposite of what I want.Basically I'm trying to shift the power dynamic so she's eating out the palm of my hand. This is how things were when I started dating her but recently it went south.
>>33792199>>33795979I dont any advice here, sorry.
>>33797592Same advice as always, build up confidence by little trivial interactions that you can back out of easily. Like just say "I like the sticker on your water bottle" and leave it at that. After doing that a few times do it some more and add additional conversation hooks or whatever you need.
>>33798676Then market yourself towards the lonely 27 year old who doesnt know how to meet people outside of hinge but is otherwise earnestly looking for a husband
I have some (possibly) novel advice!Learn a new language dependent on your day to day i.e. I have been practicing my korean at my local cafe and that has allowed me to circumvent the same-spiral and fuck-feelings that normally manifest.I highly recommend this. I am going to learn Japanese next for the karaoke bars and then Vietnamese for my favourite restaurant. Seriously. This is the weigh.
>>33799523Sounds improbable but still possible esp with how they throttle these apps. I was talking to a buddy of mine and he met his shut-in gf on an expats forum, so maybe obscure forums could be something. If only I knew which ones and how to find them.
>>33799528Ifk dude at some point you need to stop asking and just try them out
Is no social media really a red flag? This chick asked for my insta and when I told her I deleted my socials years ago she instantly unmatched me??
>>33797414Gigachad Situation
>>33800098If the girls themselves are addicted to social media, then yes Otherwise, no
what would you do if you were me: I am a bit chopped face wise (max a 7 on a good day), short (5'4) , old (31) and not rich no status.I already workout and do cold approaches regularly (out of 500 maybe one lay)Like realisitcally the amount of effort required to actually have success with women is so incredibly hard.Like I have a 1% or less chance with any woman I meet.Basically there's almost no way I will every get a gfeven if I approach like hundreds of women like I'm doingi will somehow screw it upmy actions are just not good at attracting women even if I know the right thing to say or dothere will be a moment in which I do the wrong thing and boom, there goes all the attraction they had for me out the windowI rarely get second datesall my matches on dating apps are not even mid, just genuinely not attractiveby the time I can evolve my lifestyle I will be
>>33800524I would take out a large loan and move to the phillpines or something
>>33796083What's that Star Trek quote? Sometimes you can do everything right and still loseThat's why I always try to get the girl to come over to my place as early as the first date. If she agrees, I try to smash, if not, I just proceed as normal
>>33800098Most normalfags use social media as a part of routine interaction with friends or relatives. If you don't use social media at all, then you look like a loner at best and some kind of sociopath psycho at worst.At least say that you use a different app.
>artsy girl put in her bio "to whom can I expose the urgency of my own passion?">msg her "to someone who wont ask you to dim" thinking I cooked up something >reply "dim? What's the point you're trying to make here" It's pretty obvious what I'm saying am I not? Who's larping as a poet on tinder here tf..
>>33800690What about Egyptian cat forums where I make fun of Redditors
Is it better to talk to a girl in person and get her socials that way? Or following her randomly after speaking to her a couple of times in person. We have mutuals.
>>33800937There's nothing wrong at all with following a person you've met, talked to and have mutuals with. But if you expect her to think you're into her from just that, you'd be disappointed.
She doesn't like me the same way. I'm not bothered. Plenty more f-fish in the s-sea right, b-bros? ;____:
>>33801163Yes there is. If you die without a girlfriend, at least you died following your dreams.
>>33800098How old was she? Most people over the age of like 22 know that social media is garbage and shouldn't be put off by people not using it
>>33800755This is supremely embarassing lmao. Just be yourself next time
>>33789699Oh man if you are a 35yo socially retarded man, please don't try to hone your skills on a 19yo girl. It is theoretically possible for a 35yo man to seduce a 19yo girl, but if you aren't very good looking AND very socially skilled, it's guaranteed to fail and be insanely creepy. From the story you wrote it is very obvious that you are being super awkward (and thus creepy). You have to be realistic here bro. A 35yo man being awkward towards a 19yo, while also clearly having some underlying romantic interest is going to be viewed as creepy by most people (and rightfully so). I would highly recommend that you do 2 things:1. Become better at making random conversation (non flirty/romantically interested) with literally everyone, so that you are able to just say something to a young girl without people instantly thinking you are a creep trying to hit on her2. Actually hit on women, get rejected, learn from your mistakes, learn to get over your anxieties, etc, BUT..., don't do it do girls that much younger than you. Do it on slightly more age appropriate women. I'm not saying this because I am against dating with an age gap, if you actually have the skills to seduce the 19yo girls, go ahead, I don't care, I'm saying this to save your own face. A man with bad social skills hitting on a younger girl is considered the epitomy of creepiness in our society.
>>33789678>Spend many years of my life being a "PUA">Learn the theory, etc>Obviously quickly get to a point where I realize that a more natural style of game is usually better than the classical PUA theory, but still I think the classic theory taught me a lot about how psychology and social dynamics work>Wife and I get into swinging>See how all the dudes are talking to and texting my wife>Some have ridiculously bad game, some are surprisingly good>I sit back as some Freud enjoying the show like an observer
>>33789715Sending dick-pics. A lot of guys don't realize this. Men are much more visually oriented than women are, and men usually really like it if a woman sends an ass or pussy pic, but most women don't like it at all if a guy sends a dick pic. Even if a woman is sexually interested in a guy and wants to suck his dick and get fucked etc, she still thinks that a dick pic is a bit creepy and a turn off.Now sure, there are some women that can appreciate it, but often when they do it isn't even that they actually become aroused from seeing the dick. The main reason they like the dick pic is because they see it as a compliment that a guy is attracted to them and willing to send a dick pic. But anyway, the % of women who cannot appreciate dick pics is so high that it is generally not worth it to send one. They very much prefer it if you keep your dick a secret and then show them IRL.
>>3380122522 LOL
>>33801233what are you talking about?
>>33801283This. men are turned on by images women are turned on by words. Read poetry chumps!
>Be me>Cute girl approaches me on the train>We start talking, she’s funny, confident, way more outgoing than me>Eventually she invites me out — not a clear “date”, but close enough>She’s always with her friend who also rides the same train>Whatever, we all get along, it’s chill>One day she jokes about wanting a Labubu toy>I buy one for each of them, they seem genuinely happy>They even start waiting 30 minutes every day just to ride home together>She falls asleep on my shoulder>Everything feels right>But then...>She starts feeling distant>I start feeling less interested too, like something’s fading>Now we barely talk, only text>She stopped waiting>I don’t even know if I want to see her anymore, but I feel bad ignoring her>Feels like I fumbled something, but I can’t tell what>Did I play it too slow?>Was it the lack of ambition? Never planned a date, never tried to see her on a weekend>Is it over? Should I just forget her?It's just over 1 month since we gone on that "date"
https://youtu.be/ZGdXOeq-dtQjust come to Brazil bro
>>33801723This made me want to move to Sweden.
>>33801358Women are like this. She already got her free labubu, she has no more use for you now.
>>33801750I want to agree with you, but she still shows some effort to interact with me, replies to messages and keeps me in touch, but her friend won't even stare at me, have no fucking clue why she is mad, I know she's ovulating right now might be the cycle hormones but never seen a bitch this moody, I know is that she won't leave her friend for me which is understandable, since I didn't push into creating a serious relationship with her, should I just forget it ? two women = two problems ?
>>33801790Rookie mistake is to just read this kind of body language and behavior and give up. People get moody and in their head and refuse talk about it, its stupid but its normal. Be the mature one and ask if shes ok and wants to talk about it.
>>33801814I did once, called her out in front of them, she closed up and ignored me, then the extroverted friend, texted me and said something along "she's not mad" ... " so just don't mention it again", I replied "okay, understood won't mention it again" and things got better for like 2 week and now she's a bitch again, since I made a deal to not talk about I want to avoid them because I want to call her out again for being a stupid bitch and to grow up, but I understand the way she behaves because I myself used to behave similarly, I've gotten much better with people now
>>33801850>>33801814but maybe I'm seeing this wrong, and she's having other issues and just isn't in the mood to deal with people, I have no problem talking to her about it, but I also can't just come all friendly because that would be disingenuous and not how I behave, honestly the way I would deal with myself is to give space and slowly try to warmup to her again, but her bad attitude reflects on her friend and just creates a bad environment to be around where no one wants anything with each other
I've been with Asian women for the past 6 years, and just started to consider white woman as a potential partners again.I understand why so many men are unhappy with their choices. Looking into their eyes to gauge their spirits, they all seem money hungry, egoticstical, unkind, bitchy, or wholly uninteresting. If you married them for 10 years, then died, it's like they'd find a new man within a year. This is extrapolating a lot just from photos, but I trust my sixth sense's discernment. I don't need to explain why or how.Anyway, I know all that matters is your own attraction to someone, but I can't tell if these white women are good looking for not. They all look so manly (pic rel)
>>33801860Maybe start talking to her friend to let her intercede. If they both keep reinforcing this behavior though, call them out and tell them youre just going to stop dealing with it if they can't grow up (maybe slightly more politely though)At a certain point this kind of character isnt something worth wasting your energy on
>>33801870Where did you meet them and how did you approach them?
>>33801909I suppose those are always the most significant questionsMainly on hinge 2019 to present.A few on tinder around 2020.Work events (idgaf about workplace relationships, I'll partake if I want to)Cpr certification training
Be extremely careful when confronting people about problems.
Where do I find petite asian women [spoiler]that look like kids?[/spoiler]
Gave a blonde friend/colleague a ride home in my shitbox (2000 honda civic) and it's so interesting seeing hot girls eye balling me and gaging the situation. The "girlfriend effect” or “preselection.” is so intriguing, even though I understand why.
>>33789678how to get a woman:>have stable, >have a high-paying job>have hair>have money>have house>be tall>be athletic>be strong>be giving>be brave>be willing to sacrifice your life for her and her children>be forever sedulous>be willing to offer her half of her stuff to take if ever she gets sick of you (this shows true “love” and trust).To keep a girl:>have all of above>but earn more than all other men.
>>33802334Please tell me more, you seem to be very knowledgeable and successful with women