I need some advice.I was molested once as a child by my aunt. I was five, and she was thirteen. I didn't tell a soul what happened to me until I was 24.I told my then-girlfriend, and it made her less attracted to me. It hurt me to see someone just lose all interest in me for being honest and vulnerable. I dumped her over it and haven't dated again since.The next year, I told my mom about it. Out of shock, she claims, she responded that this "didn't surprise her," and she abruptly changed the topic of conversation.I was pretty devastated about this. I told my little sister how she responded, and she immediately crawled up our mom's ass about it, who then apologized via text and explained that she just didn't know what to say. I believe her, but like, god damn.I continue to have nightmares about the abuse to this day, at age 30. I get angry and despondent about it often, often turning to alcohol and weed to just distract myself from it.I've confronted my mom twice about how I feel a need to tell her parents what their daughter did to me when I was a child, and both times my mom, very distraught, begged me not to tell them. My grandmother was sexually abused by her father many more times than I was, well into her teenage years, and she's worried that the knowledge that they managed to raise another molester would devastate them.I don't want to resent my mom and grandparents for this perceived slight after they die, but I don't know if I stand to gain any closure at all by telling more people what happened to me. I feel that this unresolved trauma is getting in the way of just about everything I want out of life--a wife, kids, new friends, chosen family--but I don't know if that resolution will come gradually, with the passage of time, or from a dialogue with my grandparents.
>>33806254
What is it that bothers u ost aboutt he whole thing? What she did? How ur mother reacted? That u couldnt tell anyone?
>>33806733I’m just offended that my mom values her parents’ feelings on the matter more than her oldest son’s. I spoke with her more about it today and she agreed that it’s unfair, but she didn’t really budge on whether or not I should blab to her parents about it. Which is helpful, but I’m certainly going to remember how this makes me feel once I have my own children.What might be the worst part of this all is how many people close to me said things to the effect of “this explains so much.” That really humiliated me. I get visibly uncomfortable when people stand too close to me, and I’ve never wanted to do things that would put me in close physical contact to other people, like team sports.I bore this completely alone for roughly twenty years and just despair at what it’s done to my life so far, I guess.
> it made her less attracted to me. It hurt me to see someone just lose all interest in me for being honest and vulnerable.She's not your therapist or mother. That's just how it works, sorry.Sorry you went through this anon, If you want some advice on the trauma and PTSD, try watching this video starting at 1:43https://rumble.com/v6wpysc-one-mans-mission-to-stop-human-trafficking-how-a-billionaire-mercenary-save.html?start=6206He went to this healing therapist who used Psilocybin which gives you neuro-plasticity like children have, and guided meditation and music. Says it changed him in a few days.Here's another video just about it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6ugFIlbgJM
>>33806254That’s really hot. Have you considered raping your aunt?
>>33806254I'm impressed by the 8 year age gap. LLMs can't even properly count the number of letter R in the word molest so I can see how this could happen.I think OP and/or OP's LLM is begging for us to ask "that one time at band camp (actually kindergarten but whatever)"My guess is auntie refused to use OPs chosen pronouns leading to much drama.
>>33810119That really happened to me.>>33809436I see now that this thread was a complete waste of my time.
