I work from home, and my bf works variable shifts so he doesn't always have the same hours. We try to save money by always eating in, so since I'm already home I try to have dinner ready right around when he's getting home so it's still hot.Since his hours aren't always the same, I always ask what time he'll be home to know when to start cooking. There's this meme his friends have been sharing about how if a woman does this it's to know when to send the guy she's cheating with away, and now he's suspicious of me.I'm hurt that he doesn't trust me, and I'm offended too. I've decided I'll just cook when I'm hungry, and if he gets home before it's ready he can just be hungry for until it's done. If it's finished before he gets home, he can heat it up himself.Last night, when he got home before I'd even started cooking he was grumpy about being hungry and ordered Doordash when he knows money is going to be tight for a while. What the fuck is wrong with him?
>>33843805You should dump him and go out with me instead Problem solved
>>33843805>now he's suspicious of me.One of these is true: he's a retard and not worth being with, or he has more reason than just the memes to suspect you're a whore. In neither case is continuing the relationship a good idea.
>>33843805Your bf is an idiot if he got suspicious because of a meme. You, however, should talk to him about it and say you don't feel trusted and how hurtful that is. And that convo is way more important than talking about the dishes and DoorDash
>>33843861Both are basically "he thinks that you're a whore".Your kids deserve a better deadbeat
>>33843805How do you know he's suspicious of you?If that is true and you aren't just jumping to conclusions, he's retarded. It should be obvious to him why you are asking when he will be home.>I stopped cooking for himThis is an excellent way to confirm any suspicion he has. Are you really going to ruin your relationship over a stupid meme? If he isn't retarded all you need to do is remind him why you always ask him when he'll be home.
Your bf is fagminded to be caring this much what his loser incel friends think, not very bf minded. Also wdym "money is going to be tight" and he ordered doordash? Who pays the rent? Are you going to have to cover some of his bills because he won't coordinate with food???This guy doesn't sound very mature OP.
>>33843805You're not communicating. He's taking your cooking at your whims as a sleight against him. You should tell him you know what his friends are saying, nowhere in your post do you suggest you've confronted him about it.
I mean I got suspicious when my ex wife started doing this shit too, and it was in fact so she can plan her affairs accordingly.Nobody has a reason to trust a woman in 2025
>>33843996You seem like the "friend" who sabotages her "friends"' relationships>>33844653this. If you haven't even talked to him about the issue, how will he interpret you ceasing to have dinner ready for him? He can't read your mind (and you can't read his).
>>33844643Additionally I want to say that couples that don't eat together are weird and it's a death flag for your relationship if he won't coordinate dinners. We are tribal and need to share meals with our loved ones
>>33843861>>33843986>>33843996We spoke about it already because he confronted me on it and that's the part that offended me to the point I stopped bothering trying to coordinate dinner with him. If trying to know his schedule so the food is hot and fresh when he gets home makes him suspicious then I just won't bother trying to coordinate it at all is my feeling.>>33844632I did remind him of it and he was all "perfect excuse huh">>33844643I cover most of our expenses bc I earn almost twice what he does. He works a more strenuous job than I do though, so I try to be considerate and handle most of the household stuff since I WFH anyway and he deserves to earn as much as I do for the hard work he's doing.We've been together for five years and until recently we haven't had any kind of problems with each other but it just feels like suddenly he's paranoid of everything and I can't help feeling like he's brainwashed or something.
>I did remind him of it and he was all "perfect excuse huh"At this point he's mentally checked out of the relationship and is looking for any reason to hate you>I cover most of our expenses bc I earn almost twice what he does. PPPFF wtf what does this guy even offer you?
>>33845860He is acting paranoid of everything because he knows the relationship is unbalanced in your favor and he is failing to provide for you as a man. He doesn't get that you are a brainwashed in love pickme all he knows right now is inadequacy and paranoia. If you want to KEEP THIS MAN you need to encourage him and build him up to get a higher paying job. I have accomplished this with my man because I'm a controlling dark triad stacy, I got him a wonderful high paying job with a $5 hourly pay increase at an engine manufacturing facility because I groomed him for it. Only if you are attached should you do this otherwise dunk out. I dunked out on a man after 9 years because he stagnated and I couldn't build him up anymore and I wanted a better standard of living (ex bf was ok making 25/hr lmfaooo)
>>33843805Lol that doordash bit really pushed this into "this dudes a little faggot" territory.
>>33845890Until all of this crud, we just really meshed well personality wise. Finishing each other's thoughts, near identical likes and interests, so on. I want my bf to be someone I like spending time with more than anything else.He started hanging out with these guys who had a really uncomfortable sense of humor. He tried to get me to hang out with his friends a few times but I couldn't stick around them after like the fourth try because I couldn't deal with their attitudes.>>33845899$25 an hour is about what he makes, but I'm a firm believer that love of money is the root of all evil. We need enough to live off of, a little more to live comfortable is nice, but I don't want to end up one of those money obsessed weirdos.>>33845900I don't like being really judgemental, especially with people I love, but that did really just turn my stomach in a way that I would've broken things off if we didn't have a few years of history together.
>>33845927You're a pickme and you need to stand up for yourself, he knows you're better than him and is being an insecure faggot about it. He's hanging around these guys and warming up to the redpill shit because it teaches him that he has value over you because he's a guy, so he's chosen it over actual growth.>muh personalityYou dumb bitch there's literally a million people who you could """mesh well""" with
>>33845927>minimum wagie>dont get along with his friends>inconsiderate of your efforts to make dinner niceyeahh..you should break up with him and go out with me or that other guy
>>33845927>sunken cost fallacy Listen, lady. Im older and I got a few LTRs in my belt. Ill tell you now.. dont do that. It doesnt matter how long you've been together. This is it. They dont change, it doesnt get better, you dont get happier or learn to deal with it.Id kill for a woman who was so intent on my schedule to have dinner Hot and ready for me. If this dude can take that and twist it like this, hes a bitch. And if he further then comes home to like one time with no dinner then whines and orders doordash, triple bitch.
come clean with your feelings. tell him you don't appreciate his remarks about suspicion. tell him you were asking because you were trying to know when to have dinner ready. tell him you felt insulted when he ordered food instead. he's being an asshole and he should be feel bad about it. if he gets defensive and pushes it off onto you, that's his problem. explain that you were trying to take care of him and your feelings are hurt because he fundamentally rejected that.
