pic rel is a post I made on soc. Here's the song in the picture https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2U-jmmuGtIoI've been pretty active on /soc/ the past 2 years which led to me developing decent social skills, but I've become incredibly disillusioned with people and its hard to go on being social. I realized the world doesn't care that much if you have positive qualities. I decided I just wanna look for the girl that felt like home (pic rel). One of them added me from that post and it was the first time in a long while I felt content and not lonely, although she went quiet and unadded me after an hour of talking.I was going to stop making normal posts on /soc/ and just copy-pasta this picture's text for years in dating threads. I'm a former math nerd and on my way to becoming very successful financially. I figure I have 7 years of trying this before I turn 35 and it starts to get really difficult.You can look my tag up in the archives (detriti99) but be prepared to cringe. I often make posts, don't like them, delete them and repost. I should change my tag soon to prevent this from warding off people.I don't know man, like thoughts, advice, stuff I should cut out/re-evaluate are all appreciated. I've been missing that starbucks girl for a long time and no one else feels the same. They don't have to be goth, but those qualities of being caring but dark and cynical just make me feel happy and I'd like to go down with a fight.
>>33843906I won't read attached documents.
>>33843906>I've been pretty active on /soc/ the past 2 years which led to me developing decent social skillslol
>>33843906I've never met a successful schizophrenic.I have met delusional schizophrenics.
I see your comments but you guys are not who I'm looking for. You can't help me.
>>33845822And it's always the math people too I have a friend like this who had some pretty legit skills, was an IMO placer and went to MIT, but at some point he had some kind of schizo psycho break and ended up living on the streets for a while. He lives with his mom now and is going back to school (different uni) and every six months he rings me up ranting about some "revolutionary new idea." Last year it was "inventing the new algebra," now it's "a whole new way to approach computer vision." Nothing's materialized of course, because even if he has the intelligence he's too detached from reality to be coherent anymore.Even with only a couple of paragraphs to go on, OP reminds me a lot of him.
>>33846171>reminds me of himWtf did I even say?I don't do math anymore. My schizophrenia fucked me so hard I stopped caring about math. I just game now.
>>33844895You just said "lol". There is nothing constructive at all about your post.>>33845822>>33846171Since my schizophrenia has come up twice: when I got schizophrenia I literally was tortured. It was so traumatic I gained 25 pounds (from 120 pounds to 145 pounds) in 1 month.It took me years to recover. I couldn't do math anymore and basically sat around killing time every day. I'm recovered now. I have meds in case I have a bad day but I don't need them or tale them. I realize the delusions were all fake. I can do math again but I don't care about math anymore. I just wanna game and watch anime.
