How do I stop being blackpilled when everyone looks at virgin men as weak losers that can't get pussy. I keep getting depressed the more the "can't get bitches" ridicule gets spread across the current zeitgeist. I keep telling myself that I'm a loser and a failure and that the time where it's okay to be a virgin is long gone (I'm 28 btw) because of the outside world. Everyone I know tells me that confidence is key but I know that I will never like myself because of ridicule from past and current times. It just adds up that I will never be a hot guy to women.
>>33873512I mean...that's what you are. You're a failure to launch male. Many men are in different ways but for you its the sexual market. If you've gone 28yrs with no action then I don't expect that to suddenly change in your 30s unless your standards hit rock bottom..
>>33873512The fact of the matter is that because you care so much about it, you'll never escape it. If it's a big deal to you that you're a virgin, it will be a big deal to others as well. On the flip side, if you stop caring about it and start interacting with people just for the sake of being friendly and having a good time, if you stop obsessing over something outside of your control, then you might actually have some luck getting laid and making friends.I know it seems oxymoronic but push it to the back of your mind and just pretend you aren't. If it comes up on a date sure be honest but don't make it a big deal. Instead of "I've been desperately trying for years, please free me from this hell and fuck me" try the "I just didn't meet the right person yet" approach.
>>33873528So it's over for me huh?
>>33873528Load of bullshit. I've known 2 guys reach well into their late 20s as virgins and both went off and have settled into loving relationships by their 30s.It takes some men longer to find their footing in life. I'd say the bulk of their issue was social. Closed off, nerdy reclusive guys who over associated with the male hobby side of their life and didn't participate in the usual rights of passage whilst living in a very narrow loop for routine.It's not like they went off on some x-pilled, maxxgrind montage either. They stayed nerdy. They never lost the weight or changed their style or any of that shit. They were just nice people and sooner or later someone nice found them. It's really that simple. OP just live your life. If it's super shut off maybe try some circuit breakers and breathe some life into yourself. Realistically just put yourself out there, don't seek casual, find someone to commit to and enjoy it. Nobody fucking cares. Adults don't care. You tell me you've not had sex, I ain't judging. Normal people don't care.
>>33873937I'd rather not be one of those guys.
>>33873528What if I spent the last 8 years of my life NEETing at home with no friends and then try to turn it around?
>>33873937I've never heard of a 28 yr old virgin suddenly turning it around unless they were a woman..
What if we're mentally ill (suicidal depression, avoidant personality disorder both diagnosed) and still a virgin at 34 years old? I have 0 hope
>>33875002Even if you think you have no hope you could be wrong. But you should always be weary of the dating scene and guys who are sad and desperate are fish to the vicious women. But also just give up bc as soon as you give up on a problem you find the solution somewhere else. Sometimes you gotta really give up though like go to the library and stop talking to women in order to smash just talk to talk
>>33873816>>33875303I wouldnt say its over but more so your chances are slim, miracles can always happen, but personally ive never seen a guy whose gone without pussy, especially this long, to recover. You can always pay for it, but to get it naturally involves trial and error on a macro level that I think you dont enough time for anymore, 8yrs is bad, 28 yrs is the fuck no zone.
Better hurry up and get laid. You’re rapidly approaching the danger zone where the only available options are single moms or fatties. It’s not just getting laid that’s important, but BY WHOM. You don’t want a boring obese wife you’re going to hate.Another option is to just ignore the cultural messaging about sex and relationships, and accept that it wasn’t meant to work out for you. That’s what a lot of us 30-somethings have done. You wouldn’t be the first anon destined to die alone.
>>33873512You are doing every single action that someone who is trying to be sad would perform.
>>33875001im in my late 20s and somehow everything just suddenly feels easier. money makes more sense, dressing properly makes more sense, dieting, exercising, reading. just like what anon said, it took me nearly 30 years to figure out how to live life and im finally having some success with women
>>33873512No one has ever asked me if I'm a virgin. Although my first girlfriend was surprised I wasn't more experienced. (She was a virgin too.)Many religious social circles think there's nothing wrong with being a virgin if you're unmarried.
>>33875577I'm a mid 30s virgin and this hasn't happened yet
>>33875403I honestly thank god I lost my virus at 19 and it confirmed I wasn't a true loser, no offense but not getting any pussy is a very unfortunate experience. Something just clicked in my brain the first moment I inserted like millions of years of evolution hitting me at once that animals fucked to create this moment for meBut yeah sex is whatever, yall will be fine without it.
>>33873816It's never to late to learn!
>>33873512>everyone looks at virgin men as weak losers that can't get pussy.But you yourself agree with them and think of yourself the same way, which is your biggest problem. As you go on to admit here:>I keep telling myself that I'm a loser and a failure >I know that I will never like myselfThis is becoming a classic self-fulfilling prophecy for you. Because of the negative self-talk and the energy you're putting out, you have allowed your actions to fall in line with this low opinion of yourself and, whether you realize it or not, you are eliciting that same reaction from other people as well. The negative self-talk has to end OP. That doesn't mean you jump right into delusional sunshine and rainbows, but bring it up to at the very least some neutrality.That said, without delving into your circumstances, I'm sure there's a lot of things you could have been doing differently. You might want to get moving on that, while also learning to forgive and like yourself.Basically, what I'm telling you to do is to start doing more while also caring less (equally important). That may well be easier said than done, but nevertheless that's the road map for you to get out of hell.
>>33873937>They were just nice people and sooner or later someone nice found them. It's really that simpleSo, they had good luck, basically. If luck wasn’t on their side (which it isn’t for most men who get to their 30s lonely), they’d have been fucked, because they didn’t actually make any big changes to create opportunity in the first place.
>>33876395>So, they had good luckWell, it is and it isn't. People frequently create their own luck.Look at what you quoted. "they were nice people and sooner or later someone nice found them". Ok, that may seem like luck to someone who is not in their position. But these "lucky" people did two things that many of the people on this board complaining have not. They made themselves into nice/cool/likable people to begin with, and then they inserted themselves into a position where someone could meet them at all just by going out and doing stuff with or around people.Luck is often said to be just where preparedness meets opportunity. The annoying unlikable guy who just sits and seethes on 4chan is neither prepared nor does he have opportunity, so it's a logical outcome that he never gets as "lucky" as some of the success stories you see or read about.
