I’m 25f and a recovering neet femcel. I have Aspergers, adhd, dyscalculia. I dropped out of college twice but im enrolled again majoring in history, unsure abt career but maybe receptionist or special ed teacherI used to be a friendless fat but not anymore. I met someone (26m) through a friend of a friend and he made it clear he was interested. when we first met I already found him attractive, he’s 5’6 and sort of lanky weeb but i think hes hot and perfect. We've been dating 4 months, we have complementary personalities and goals in life, both eventually want to start a family etc. so i thought things were going greatThe problem is that he’s more stable in life than I am, by quite a lot actually. He has a degree in engineering and he graduated with honours and internships, meanwhile I have none of that. He is sort of autistic like I mentioned before but I feel insecure about being a loser compared to him. he knows about my learning disabilities and doesn’t seem to care, seems like he is encouraging me to get better. I got to meet some of his coworkers and some of them are female, and they’re all prettier and smarter, more successful than me. i feel jealous, that he’s at work all day around normie girls and I feel like I can never compare to them, because I was born dysgenic and I am so behind in life. I'm crying and wondering why God made me a retard. I really thought I found someone right for me and that I could be happy and have a future with him. Now I realize that he could leave me anytime and find a girl who’s not a total retard nut case and date her instead. In a few years he might be making more money and then he might leave and find someone in his social class. of course I know he probably “loves” me just like I love him, but wtf do I do? will i always feel insecure in this relationship?
bump, someone please help me
It is unlikely that he feels a need to "upgrade" to a better woman unless you seriously mess with his quality of life with your retardation. Men are less hypergamous that women. Good enough is often good enough for men especially if hes autistic and realizes that the quest for the perfect partner is pointless. To many women good enough can feel unbearable when there are better options around her. It sound like you might be projecting your own way of thinking onto him. That being said he might still leave you at any moment for any reason. You have to live with your fears like everybody else and focus on things you have control over. Just enjoy your relationship.
>>33877491damn ok, i guess i do get superficial when im insecure.but, for example, men who are doctors/lawyers tend to marry women who are doctors/lawyers or at least some sort of educated professional. if he's "dating down" is he just going to take advantage of me eventually. something something power imbalance
1. being a receptionist is not a career, but it is at least a job.2. i don't recommend being a special ed teacher when you seem to proudly collect mental illnessess like pokemon.3. objectively I don't see how majoring in history is gonna do anything for your career - beyond proving that you can get higher education and thus aren't really a troglodyte. But it is nice that you have a hobby.4. i praise you for finding the discipline to unfat yourself. You're already better than a lot of people.5. I don't see any reason why your relationship shouldn't last - unless he's showing some clear signs of pulling away.6. Perhaps you can ask him in non-confrontational manner - what he likes about you, or better yet what he respects about you.
>>33877523I do not think this to be accurate. True love knows no social class. Doctors with housewives may balance this power by being submissive. Often, high IQ, status, and career positions are notorious for being a very submissive breed of man. It is like hyperindependence kicked in and their oulet for sub is sex. Who do you find tied and bound in cockrings and gimp mask?
>>33877523What does "taking advantage of" even mean in this context? Stop trying to control everything. Thats how you get anxiety disorders.
>>33877535Receptionist is probably the best i could hope for unless i can prove myself capable of getting a more demanding job, same w/ the history degree. some of my former classmates with useless degrees do admin type jobs. but that being said, im jealous of him for being good at stem. his job seems not-bullshit unlike businessi would like to talk to him about it, but i feel like if i let on how i feel insecure then that will make him start pulling away. it feels like the elephant in the room, i guess this is a hysterical woman tendency but i feel like i have to act like it doesn't bother me unless he brings it up first.
>>33877582Okay sounds good, i'll be sure to bring it up with him and see how he responds
>>33877582What the fuck
>>33877523>if he's "dating down" is he just going to take advantage of me eventually. something something power imbalanceno, because for most men, "dating down" in terms of earning potential, physical fitness, or something like that is just reality for us if we want to date at all. especially if this guy is as you describe>he’s 5’6 and sort of lanky weeb>He is sort of autisticthe dating world for men with any degree of autism/introversion whatsoever, especially at a height under 6ft is not a nice place. he's lucky to have you and almost certainly realizes that if he's 26, so as long as you don't completely let yourself go, you'll be good
For men it's much more about the personality. If he enjoys your personality and you mesh vibe whatever the fuck then it doesn't matter if there's someone more successful / hotter whatever the hell working beside him (and coworkers is another thing...we might fantasize about them but actually attempting relationships with them is considered a big retard move by just about everyone).Now, if he seems to have some sort of goal for you, some vision of your occupation or whatever, hopefully inline with your own visions, and you never work towards that...then that stagnation looming over the relationship could lead to your paranoia manifesting into reality. But he (and you, idk) could have quite low expectations. How the hell do you know unless you talk about it? Now don't be overly emotional about it, because that could lead to him thinking something along the lines of "damn this bitch is gonna be jealous as hell if I'm around any women at all and bite my head off about it"; but acknowledge that you feel a bit embarassed by his colleagues seeming more succesful...and do the woman thing and gauge his response I guess as to what degree he thinks you SHOULD be embarassed, and whether that's because he wants the best for you or just the best for him.Idk bro, comparing yourself like that is stupid unless you use it as fuel to get better. If it just hurts you and accomplished nothing, stop doing it. Those women have plenty of cons just as they have their one pro of being a bit more successful.That's all the brainpower I can give ya sorry best of luck.
ywnbaw
>>33877389Get a piece of paper and write 100 times, like Bart on the blackboard,HE LIKES ME.That is the ONLY relevant fact in your entire post.
>>33877389most men do not need their fuck hole to be sentient. You can compensate retardation by being an amazing fuck hole
>femcel
>>33877389I'm not reading all that woman.
>>33877389Seems the solution is obvious, make meaningful progress while enjoying your relationship
>>33877389•Lose all the extra weight.•Drain his balls constantly. I mean seek him out at work and suck him off under his desk, "constantly". Pull him into the janitors closet for a quickie. Make him cum all over you and every surface of the house (unintentionally). Stick you hands into his pants as you hang off him. Make him feel like a fucking stud. Go fucking smack his butt RIGHT NOW and smile, and don't tell him an anon told you to.•DO NOT STOP HAVING SEX WITH HIM.•Don't start drama.He already likes you. Just keep that up.
>>33877389guys don’t care about the status or education or finances of a girl the way girls do for guys. you’re fine, really. guys dont find career women all that attractive. in fact it is an ‘ick’. a woman who stays at home, or like you said, something small like a special ed teacher, who makes food for him, a massage, whatever, cooks and cleans, thats nice. a boss lady working her ass off to get a degree or a higher paying job isnt lady like or attractive.
You've probably already tuned this thread out (within reason) because of all the nitpicky anons that bait reply every thread, but I'll throw this in for you anyways if you end up looking back. Apologies if I tend to ramble. Not very good at being concise.>>33877389Anon, it's not that he "could pick" those normie girls; he's surely aware of them. And yet, he chose you over these other girls instead. Because he wants to accept and love your faults just as well as he does your strengths. That's what I can tell from how you describe him. It's the quality that makes for a true partner. Sounds like a real keeper to me, that kind of man is a rare find these days.>The problem is that he’s more stable in life than I am, by quite a lot actually.Hehe sounds like he could be quite the breadwinner then. But...>seems like he is encouraging me to get better.He's doing this because he cares about you. He certainly already knows that you're tearing yourself up about stuff like this. And he doesn't want you to suffer that way; he wants to lift you up because he doesn't want to see you in this kind of pain in the first place. He wants to lift up YOUR self-image, not his image of you. And you know you best of all. So I'd say tell him about your insecurities relating to yourself. It'd be unfair to both of you for this kind of pain to snowball.Though, may want to step carefully around the topic of jealousy to avoid unintentionally hurting him; instead of telling him that you feel he could leave you any time, perhaps ask him why he chose you specifically over other people. Inquire. What makes you worth more than anyone else, in his eyes?
