I broke up with my girlfriend a week ago after she verbally berated me for hours, fell asleep, apologised in the morning, then when I said that's not good enough, she berated me for a few more hours. She did that somtimes, along with vague death threats (not at me), glorifying violence, and lying about nothing, nonsense, but most of the time she was very sweet. I just couldn't take that 10% of the time she was crazy anymore. I told her with loving sincerity to contact mental healthcare professionals. She didn't take that well. I spent hours looking up as much info as I could about mental healthcare options around her and gave her as much info as possible. She denied there was an issue at all. When I ensured her we were over, broken up, she berated me more, and told me if I said goodbye, she'd be out of my life for good. I told her goodbye and blacked her on everything but direct text messages. She explouded over the next 2 days or so, going from insults to threats, to stalkery behaviour, to begging to hear my talk with me. I only ever responded in text form twice once confirm in writing it was over and she should seek professional help, and again to say goodbye and wish her the best. Neither wrre recieved well.Anyways, as said it's been a week. She told me she had no friends and relied on me to get to sleep at night and whatnot. She also said she was self harming at the end despite me telling her that her doing so upset me greatly, and made reference to suicide.I know it's fucked up, and I can't say I love her anymore, but I still want to make sure she's on the right path, that she's not spiralling into suicide. Should I contact her? Would that just make things worse for both of us? Is there another way, or should I just be pushing down my fears?Pic unrelated
>>33994547yeah, leave her alone, don't confuse the poor girl
>>33994547>but most of the time she was very sweet.This is akin to a woman saying "but he only rapes me every blue moon". Get some self respect.>Can't take that 10% of the time she's crazyNigger, you should've never been able to take that. Again, get some self respect. At least you've made a good step in ending the relationship.>I spent hours looking up as much info as I could about mental healthcare options around her and gave her as much info as possible.You can take a horse to water....I'm not even sure why you tried.> I still want to make sure she's on the right path,Who gives a fuck? You clearly respect her more than you respect yourself. You need to focus on your own inner work, self confidence and self respect before you give an iota of a fuck for someone who clearly doesn't respect you. What do they say in an airplane? Put your own mask on before putting on someone else? Yeah. Apply that to sorting your mindset and life.>Should I contact her?Move the fuck on, keep her blocked, and sort your own shit. Fuck your "fears". Fix your mindset and self image. Fuck everything else. Your priorities are completely fucked, anon.
>berateabout what exactly? is she correct? arent all women at least 10% crazy? maybe you shouldve "stuffed" her. give her no chance, no platform to berate you or open her mouth to spout nonsense?they say sometimes love goes through the stomach. and when shes no more hungry, you couldve make some love and then what wouldve been there left for her to berate you about?also why are people so quick to drop people nowadays?i now i am quick because i somewhat rose above the normoid sphere via intellect, visio and wisdom, seeking perfection in all, but i always give people one chance and the possibilty to explain themselves if they are acting in honesty/Truth/calm.maybe you shouldve gone for a walk, like 2-3 days or 1 week away from her, taking a pause. maybe a short vacation to clear your mind and then come back to her? ofc communicating that to her, that you will come back and depending on how what shes gonna say upn you returning....well see.i had terrible, terrible conflicts with my parents when i was still living with them, DAILY psycho terror, internal wars, shoutfights ect ect.after 3-4 years apart, it all cooled down and i see how idiotic i was and they were and we came closer again. sure the deep scars are there and wont probably forgotten, but thats life. i still love them and they still love me.all in all we are on the same page. and iam glad that they have me and that they parented me how they did.
>>33994597Unironically this is one of the most kind, helpful, and logical replies and advice I've read in months. Listen to this guy OP
>>33994547You're a fucking nigger to leave her like that. I don't even know or want to know how the Fuck are you still Eating and sleeping with her clearly being in distress. How the fuck can you be so obtuse. This is your karma. You'll sow what you reap today. Keep doing this and you'll find out
>>33994597Yeah, I know this is correct, it's just hard.>>33994991>berateInsult, accuse me of lying, tell me I did or said things I never did or said-- I can't tell you how many times she said I called her stupid or an idiot and I never once did.She yelled at my for an hour about how I was a bad boyfriend for telling her "It's okay, princess, back to sleep." When she half woke up in the night one time-- she accused me of telling her to shut up and calling her a stupid idiot, neither of which I did. She went on to say her previous boyfriends would have never talked to her like that, and other such things along with the usual insults.
>>33995928>She went on to say her previous boyfriends would have never talked to heri rest my case OP
>>33994547Mental healthcare is a fucking scam BUT. Call the cops and they will detain her if she’s a threat to herself and you have proof. They will force her to go to a psych ward. It wont help her mentally, but maybe it will put her in her place and a force change in behavior. They’ll force her on meds and that will force her behavior to change. 100% report this shit to police though.>>33995049lol stfu dumbass
>>33994547OP, these other assholes in this thread have never had a girlfriend and are currently fucking their hands. So disregard ALL of them because they're all chuds. However, you made the right decision. You now need to concentrate on yourself and it's going to take six months to a year to get over all of it unless you somehow make a new connection with someone else in that time frame. If you really think she'll harm herself, then you should contact either her parents or the police but just watch what you say. If you have text proof that she says she's going to self-harm or commit suicide or threaten, then you have something to act on. If you don't have proof, then don't bother and just go through your grieving without contacting her or her parents. Just let shit be and move on. Clearly your ex is not well. You have to put your own needs forth first and foremost. Breaking up sucks because now you have to decouple and there is no more dopamine fixes for the good times you shared as I'm sure there were a few or else you'd have bolted a long time ago. It's also Christmas'ish time. Feels get amplified here. So I wish you the best in your healing process. Surround yourself with friends and family. Go see live music and just be around other happy humans. You need to get your footing again solo. It takes time and it's an unfamiliar feeling for quite a while. Good luck Anon. Don't accept someone who disrespects you. Your job is not to save her from herself.
>>33996740Sadly she doesn't have parents anymore. I was with her when her mom passed this year, and her dad passed recently prior. I would contect her sister, but I don't have a way to and their relationship was strained anyways. I don't have enough suspicion that she will kill herself or seriously self harm as to call the police, especially since I know she has illegal stuff at her place (nothing absolutely terrible, but illegal nonetheless). Thankfully I do have family to console to and be around, especially arpund the holidays. I wish she had family or friends that were that close.But again, she was a huge liar, so I don't know whether or not she does have people close to her, what her relationships are otherwise, etc. I tried to help as best I could, tried to be a good boyfriend all the while, but I couldn't take it anymore, and rightfully so, I didn't deserve it, so it's over. It's up to her to get her life together, not me.Thanks, anon.
WEB RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT REALSHE IS NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND"SHE" IS A MENTALLY ILL 300 POUNDS CHANNER
>>33995928It's not hard at all. You're just choosing to make it hard by wasting time on it. You could literally choose to stop thinking about it right now if you really wanted to.
>>33997018You're welcome Anon. Thanks for sharing and glad you got this all off your mind. You're going to go through a yo-yo of emotions for a while still though. All of it, ups and downs, happy, sad, angry...but eventually you'll come to acceptance but it all takes time. Focus on your last few sentences to me and keep repeating those to you in your mind. You did what you could and that's respectable. Hopefully your ex gets her shit together and does some introspection and growing. It's sad her Mom passed and her Dad too. My ex lost both her parents also so I know what that's like ironically with an ex-GF. You'd think that they'd be less argumentative and abusive right? Wrong..they end up using YOU as their "venting/punching bag" (figuratively, I hope). This person is going to carry a lot of abandonment and anger issues forever until she gets a hold of them. They don't seem to get it that THEY contributed to the demise of the relationship with their shitty behavior and attitude. This is total cliche but there is someone else out there for you and she will not treat you like this person did. She'll make this relationship seem like a speed-bump. I wish you the best finding her. It's also perfectly fine to be "meh" towards women in general for a bit. Just heal up and get yourself healthy and happy again. You did fine anon. Don't be hard on yourself. You seem like a good person.
>>33997702Thanks, anon, I really appreciate it. You really eased my mind. Sometimes tge internet feels like it's filled with sorrow and hatred, but you showed kindness. I hope everything goes well for you.
>>33994547If it gets to a point where you're genuinely concerned that she may be hurting herself, call emergency services and report it. If she's serious she'll (hopefully) be set on a path to getting better. If it's a manipulation tactic she'll learn that crying wolf has consequences.No, don't contact her. You've already made it clear that where you're concerned a productive conversation is not possible. Sucks that she's going through some shit but she's not letting you help her at all
