25MI've been disabled for the past 3 years. I have finally figured out how to manage it. Right now the only problems I have are that I cut my fingertip off and can't use it right now, that I ripped my big toenail off and that I'm sick. Which is pretty good considering how bad things were. I used to like a lot of things but now I can't even look at the things I used to do. I train at the gym because I have to for my condition or else I will be disabled within 2 weeks and lose my job at a restaurant I worked so hard to be able to do. Now that things are ok ish and I get some free time in the week I get super depressed because I don't know what to do and get lonely. After all that it feels like anything not productive will just drag me back down to where I was. I feel so much guilt when I'm not pushing 100%. So I end up just listing to music in a dark room alone till it's time to go to bed. Every choice I make feels like a waste. Nothing gets me excited in the slightest. Am I traumatized? is this depression? Just give me your opinion on the matter cuz I don't know what to do. Thank you.
the thing about trauma is that it's a solo battle, and it's more accurate if we say it's an affliction of the consciousness or 'soul' if you prefer. to get at any substantial answers to your questions, to heal, to close the rift that opened, takes immense self examination. it could be that you were always traumatized and becoming disabled merely brought it out and revealed it by making it harder to cope. therapists can probably help you maintain a level of function but they can't ease the pain or answer any deep questions about your own psychology, for that you need intensive study of the relevant subjects and some emotional self-probing... start with memories, try to relive certain things, you'll find they sort of 'unlock' and over time change character... when we talk about 'healing' that's what we're looking for, to change the fundamental character of the injurious memories attached to the trauma.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbBQVqX253g
>>34054697Youre fine
youre depressedtry going out, exercising or playing videogames online, cook, do any hobby
>>34059283I am and I don't like it
