Hello everyone, I hope you are doing well. I am 25, and currently learning for a degree in movie SFX since this year. Thing is, before I started this degree, I studied for a bachelor in japanology. This sounds like a complete meme degree, and it kinda is, but I enjoyed it. But I did it right after school, because I had no actual idea what to do, so I was very unprepared and before I knew what actually happened, I failed the language test three times and couldnt continue. It was during covid times, so it was all very chaotic. I also have some sort of issue where time just flies past and before I can properly lock in, its already too late. Or maybe thats just how it goes for everyone and I am bad at dealing with it. So, after that I continued with my job I got while I was studying, it paid relatively well, but was nothing too special and just a good supermarket job, nothing with a good future. I absolutely love movies and the special effects magic behind them, and when I found out about this education for SFX, I thought I finally found the thing for me, because on paper it sounded perfect for me. But I don't think I have ever before been so miserable in my life as in this year where I started my SFX education. I am not happy, not even contempt with anything I do, I am massively lacking behind, and its as if every part of my body and soul rebels against doing this even though it seemed like something I would enjoy. And its not as if I am against working, my job was some shitty wagie slave labor in the busiest and most crackhead infested area of the whole county and was way more taxing than my current education, but somehow, even that was more fulfilling and enjoyable.
So I have no idea what to do, I am running out of options, and as nice as being a NEET is, I do want to make something out of myself. The only thing I can think of is kickboxing, I did that since I was 18 and had pretty good training partners, but the last time I somewhat seriously did that was 4 years ago, and I stopped because studying, working and kickboxing at the same time was just too much. In hindsight, I should have just focused on kickboxing, it is one of my biggest regrets that I did not seriously pursue it when I was younger. Now I am 25 and out of shape, so it is probably too late to even consider a kickboxing career, and even if, most of the kickboxers can barely live with what they get from it unless they get lucky and get famous. I was asked by someone I know from kickboxing who is a bouncer, if I wanted to be a bouncer alongside him for a pretty well paying club. If I focus on training again I could at least secure a good source of money there. How do I go about changing my life and getting myself out of this miserable depression I am in? Any help is appreciated, and sorry for the long post
>>34056036It sounds like all of the times you were unhappy were the times when you were studying. Some people are not well suited to academics or any career involving study and paperwork. Some people are better suited to careers that involve doing things physically.
>>34056356I don't know, studying itself was pretty fun, going there, attending the lectures, just being there with all the other students. But just like everything else I do, if you would ask me "how do you see yourself with this in the future" I could not think of anything, just a literal blank image, and its so frustrating, I just feel like I am doing stuff for the sake of doing stuff and wasting my time doing stuff when I could do something much better
