idk where else to vent so i guess i am doing it here. if anyone wants to chime in with their own experiences feel free. i am about to turn 25 and i think i finally understand why people in their late 50s only have two or three friends, if that.since 2016 i was part of a huge friend group, like twenty people. it felt like what real friendship was supposed to be. i felt loved and like i belonged somewhere. after covid, around 2022, the group split into smaller circles and i ended up in one with about ten people i considered my closest friends. that year felt like a turning point for me, like i was finally maturing. we started throwing parties at our places, hooking up, doing a lot of drugs. it was chaotic but it felt alive.in 2024 i threw my first party at my place. it was a mess, a lot of drugs, random people, total degeneracy. but it was fun and i felt alive. a few months later i planned a second party and made an instagram group chat just to give updates. it was not meant to be a conversation. some people would not stop talking so i kicked out three of them. one of them was someone i considered my best friend.cont in reply
>>34067415he ended up sending voice messages from another friend's phone while they were together, embarrassing me and saying things like i abuse downers and that i only invited certain people to look cool. we eventually made up.more months passed and now the main group chat is completely dead. i was backstabbed by three other friends over things that felt out of my control. one was because i could not properly direct my first movie ever and because i used drugs during filming. she was the cinematographer. the other two just stopped talking to me with no explanation.today i messaged the group chat and wrote "rip" followed by the chat name. it felt very real. the friend who embarrassed me earlier messaged me privately and tried to help, but i honestly do not know what to do.it feels like i need to start cutting down the people i keep around or just meet entirely new people. but most of these people i have known since 2016, some since kindergarten. it is just sad.is this what becoming an adult is like? all this time i was feeling like i was still 16 mentally, or like 20 at most.
> is this what becoming an adult is like?Yes, sorrySounds like you need healthier sense of self and friendships built on new identity and shared values rather than partying tho Also groups are always bound to get messy.
