I don't know how to improvise in social situations. I'm overly worried about embarrassing myself. I don't trust my intuition. Usually I only talk to people when I need to, in a very direct way. I'm never comfortably sure about the untold elements of social interaction. If I'm invested on it, I will try to find explanations to logically support my intuitive perception, but I always end up with at least three different competing narratives in my head about "what she meant by this." Sometimes I act, based on the narrative that sounds the most solid or how I'm feeling that day, but it's normally some very low risk, baby steps, overthought, super abstract action towards a goal that I would only realistic reach in like 10 years if people are willing to wait 10 years for me. Old friends and relatives do, but it turns out girls aren't that patient. I've never been in a relationship, always fumbling it in the talking stage, if not in the starring stage already.This risk aversion only seems to be this bad for social interactions because I'm quite impulsive with other stuff and I'm frequently making mistakes in my life or radical changes for the better or the worse.What can I do about this? Is it even solvable at this point or do I have to accept that as part of my established personality?
simply get a retail job and this will probably all go away
>>34097123Why? I already have to regularly interact face to face with different people because of the stuff that I do. I don't have a problem communicating if that's the implication. It only becomes a problem if it could cross personal life territory.
>>34097109The most immediate advice is to go to therapy so they can help you build a framework for not catastrophizing situations and for learning to be okay with the unknown.The “Opposite Day” episode of Seinfeld is a hilarious example of how going for things on a whim and not getting stuck in your own head can actually lead to better outcomes.I used to have the same problem until I realized there are people with very little social awareness who still manage to socialize just fine, even if they trip over their words or have no filter at all.
