I still think about her all the time and I fucking hate it. We almost had children together.I think about how things could have gone, how I should have been different or better, how things would be fine if she hadn't given up or had actually worked on things. I haven't seen her since about 3 months after we broke up, I've resisted the urge of looking her up, my brain floods with ideas of how she's probably doing so much better than me now or worse that her cutting and self harm got so bad that she continued down a path of self destruction. How do I stop thinking about it and wanting some resolution I'll never get? I know so much worse shit goes on in the world, I know people have terrible, awful things happen to them from their significant others but my brain is having such a hard time letting go.
>>34130931If you don't find another girl, you will keep thinking about her. Even after years, this will remain true.
I can tell you with 100% certainty thst she's banging a guy thst she doesn't even like rn
>>34130951I have a couple times, but they had a lot of similarities to her including never wanting to work through anything. Just the moment I decide not to submit to their emotional whirlwind and game playing they cut the relationship off completely.>>34131064Probably, she went and fucked a bunch of people within hours of us breaking up and then bragged about it on social media. She'd frequent places we'd go together or places I took her to with other guys and just stare at me if I noticed her. I truly never ever understood her actions.
Almost added mother to the end of self harming slut whore, and still pining over that trash, fk up
>>34130931It's pretty much just hormones and biology fucking you up. There's no logical reason to be attached, it's just a chemical cocktail that you're withdrawing from. You basically just keep going through the pain until it heals, same as if your dog died.
>>34131731>There's no logical reason to be attached, it's just a chemical cocktail that you're withdrawing from.Wow, thanks a lot
>>34131770Is this what you wanted?
>>34131690Yeah I don't know why, my mind just remembers everything I loved about her and how she made me feel. She would cut herself as some weird game playing, like she'd call me up if I ever went and did anything without her saying she "did something bad" and she'd be slicing her thighs open. One time she did it in front of me after starting an argument, she'd get migraines and get mad if I touched her but she'd come running to me when they'd start looking for me to comfort her. The image of her on her dorm floor in nothing but bloodied panties and the like stringy bits of muscle and skin dangling off her hips is just seared in my head. >>34131731I'm not the anon who replied with the Atheist chud picture but I do see things as having more meaning than just randomly firing chemicals. I hope one day you have an experience undeniably divine and cosmic so you know we're more than that.
>>34133980The whole, block ur eyes n ears forever gimmick is pussy, you can still retain acquaintanceship with the person and have a mature casual candid update chit chat with them. Anyway you really should be finding a gal less mentally deranged fr
>>34135605What does the first part of your post mean, sorry am retard
>>34135605This.Been out of a relationship for about 2 months same situation not as harmful, but Just start moving on, talk to new women do things that interest you. Go to the gym, Vidya comics whatever to keep your mind out of that space. My Ex was also mentally unwell and I ended it out of that reason alone. It sticks in my mind as I was talking of kids and marriage but would I want my kids to be affected or my family?(We were planning on Christmas to meet my parents) Probably Not. You cannot change others, and obsessing over someone who refuses to change is not worth the short bit of time we live on the earth. It Gets Better Just Takes Time.>Picrel was from another thread but I ended up reading the whole book. Kingship of Self ControlA life of worry and regret is a life in vain.
>>34137138Mostly in response to>I haven't seen her since about 3 months after we broke up, I've resisted the urge of looking her up, my brain floods with ideas of how she's probably doing so much better than me now or worse that her cutting and self harm got so bad that she continued down a path of self destruction.>How do I stop thinking about it and wanting some resolution I'll never get?
>>34138736I don't think that's a great idea but it's not really by "choice" exactly. I've literally never seen her again and would have no way of getting in contact with her. I've resisted the urge of trying because I figure that's just stupid, there's absolutely zero reason to keep contact with her and our relationship was a very long time ago. I always thought it very strange I literally never saw her again, tho. Usually exes bump into each other at least eventually, I even have a friend who bumped into his ex fiance on a random trip he and his current gf took to Puerto Rico. However I've never seen either of my two exes ever again, they just vanished from my life it felt like.
>>34130931Forget that bitch, OP.
>>34130931I'm not bothering to read any other post here in this LARP but in any case you need a lot of alone time to leave everyone and go to the woods for a couple months by yourself because You have such low concept that everyone sees it The only thing you can do is work on yourself and not subject others to your garbage
>>34140850>absolutely zero reason to keep contactYou're not "keeping" contact, you're just checking in, like one final welfare check almost, or sanity check since you're inundated and going insane from all the "possibilities" and you need reality to recalibrate you to the earth
>>34142992(Reality check)
>>34142992>>34142996Again, I have no way of doing that, even if I wanted to. Never saw her again, never had any access or awareness of her social media, she had a tumblr when that was a thing but I doubt it's still active. I don't want to know what she's up to but even if I did it's not like she's some casual acquaintance I can go check up on.
>>34144577>I've resisted the urge of looking her up, my brain floods with ideas of how she's probably doing >I have no way of doing that, even if I wanted to.>I don't want to know what she's up toThen maybe get your narrative right next time
>>34145511That's not a conflicting narrative, you're speaking from your personal experience that someone you may have been in a relationship with is a phone call or an instagram click away with the suggestion that I'm avoidant.She had no social group, it's been years since I saw or heard of her anywhere. I could probably locate her if I really tried or really had the desire to but I don't, that seems like it's just asking for trouble.>>34140993>tripfag is a faggot retardshocker.
>>34145687It conflicts because first you're hesitant, and considering ideas, then next moment you're finalised and shut all of them out>how she's probably doing so much better than me now or worse that her cutting and self harm got so bad that she continued down a path of self destruction.Which one would you prefer? You'd probably feel relieved if she was doing much worse than you, rite? Well then just assume that it's the opposite and that she's gotten better and is doing fine with some new white knight simp faggot daddying herAnd if you can locate her and see how she's doing, just do it? You don't even need a massive huge reason, this is just keeping up to date with your community but apparently in this day n age it's a fucking crime to cultivate/nurture bonds and everyone must be atomized retards doing shady shit in their little private echo chambers/rooms
>>34145718>but apparently in this day n age it's a fucking crime to cultivate/nurture bonds and everyone must be atomized retards doing shady shit in their little private echo chambers/roomsHonestly that's kind of what fucked me up about the whole thing with her in the first place.She went to university out of state, had no friends back home whatsoever. She didn't want to work on anything or keep up a bond if I wasn't willing to do nothing but simp for her. She had no real friend group but hid away the closest things to "friends" she had which was just a weird revolving door of mostly female fuckbuddies.
>>34145758Cooked but yeaHappensLotta people are like that, all or nothing, black n white, extremely guarded/closed-minded and immature as fuck, block every opportunity, just want silver bullet solutions, ignore the nuances of lifeShe's moved onto the next of her revolving door of disposable orbiters to leech off of
