My girlfriend has this really bad habit where she agrees to things but then the day of, she bails due to social anxiety. Then if I go without her she cries that I’m abandoning her.We were invited to a party, I confirmed that we’re going the day before. Then when it’s time to go she says “anon I can’t go I have anxiety!!!”. I told her that I’ll just have to go without her and she started crying and goes “you’re leaving me why are you leaving me?????”. This has happened so often my friends stopped inviting me to things because they know I’ll bail. For my friends wedding my friend made me promise I wouldn’t bail just because my gf. My girlfriend of course bailed the day of and then I decided to go anyway. She cried but I wasn’t going to kiss my best friends wedding because she cried and refused to come. I came back home and she threw a fit thag I left. It seems like the only way to satisfy her would be to never ever leave the house. The thing I’m most annoyed at is that she agrees to go to these events KNOWING she will bail last minute because of anxiety and then I have to look like a scumbag who always cancels last minute
>>34137324It seems doomed anyway, so your best option is to do what you want. Because if you supplicate to her, you will ruin your own social life and then she'll think you are a loser and leave you anyway.
>>34137324Sounds like a her problem. If she can't get over her anxiety issues to be with you and doing things you want to do, that's an unhealthy and one sided relationship. If you haven't already, talk to her about it. If you have, and she doesn't want to change, you might want to leave her. Often times it's not worth putting yourself through the stress of trying to fix someone who can't or won't fix themselves.
>>34137335Yeah that’s what I’m thinking
>>34137324Seems like you have incompatible lifestyles. Don't be in a relationship with someone who's not down to do the things you want to do. I did that for years once and it sucked, not even last minute bailing but refusing to go places with me in the first place. It can be so much better for you bro.
>>34137324It's an attention seeking strategy. Id say bail on her, she is not telling you what she actually wants and then is trying to make you the bad guy.
>>34137324Kek, i guess this is my future too. My girlfriend is probably going to be in water astrologically. Emotional, needy, clingy, dependent.
>>34137324Does she genuinely want to attend these events, or is she doing what she wants and using her mental illness as a cover? Is she getting therapy or medication?If you have hope for a better future, it might be worth hanging on.If nothing is going to change, it might be time to move on.
>>34137324You should trade her in for a working model.
>>34137324If she doesn't have a severe impairment from social anxiety, then she's being manipulative and controlling. Y'all need to have a serious discussion about it. Not that I'd recommend an ultimatum but it should boil down to:>Accept that I will still do these things if your anxiety causes you to bail at the last minute and you need to be okay with thator >You need to work through your anxiety and start pushing yourself to do these things with me or else it'll never get betterEither way, she needs to learn to cope with her anxiety. Or she's crazy af and will slowly suck your life from you.
>>34137335>Because if you supplicate to her, you will ruin your own social life and then she'll think you are a loser and leave you anyway.Jesus Christ, women are fucking crazy.
>>34137324what does the rest of the evening look like typically in the instances where you caved in and stayed instead of going?
>>34137324Have you talked to her about this pattern?
