How can you find out for sure whether or not you actually want a relationship or are just horny and need to bust a nut? One of my greatest fears is (by some miracle) actually getting a gf, we have (ideally) regular sex, and then because of that I start to not care about her as much. I know this occurs for both men and women and it's often a reason and justification for cheating. I wouldn't cheat I'd just talk to her or leave of I felt my needs aren't being met but I would hate to be the kind of dude who gets with a girl only to find out my lizard brain made me "care about her" until post-nut-clarity hits. Maybe this is only a concern from me because I'm a virgin dude in his 20s. Is anyone else concerned about this? Is it normal? I feel like a mentally disabled idiot just asking this because I feel like the majority of people just inherently figure this stuff out without any help or having to embarrass yourself in order to do it right
>>34140155I'd you ever wondered why our forefathers always tell us to have romance (ideally married) before the sex this is why. Having sex too early can ruin or complicate the bonding process, for some people it doesn't but those people typically at least knew of or interacted with the woman for a time before engaging sexually. If you are going from stranger > girlfriend with a girl you just met, hold off on sex until three months in. Love takes months to develop between two people. If you have sex right off the bat, you will encounter the thing you are worried about: You will get bored and will have satisfied your sexual itch and this will meme your mind into believing there's nothing else to experience with the girl, which means you close yourself off to romance and love bonding. If you play the patient game and let the love and trust build first, then sex no longer becomes a potential liability, but an asset to the relationship. Our ancestors knew this for thousands of years and that's why the insistence to wait for commitment has always been advised. It was not just to pacify a religious dogma, its actually to enhance and secure the connections you wish to keep.
>>34140155>How can you find out for sure whether or not you actually want a relationship or are just horny and need to bust a nut?How do you feel after you come?
>>34140155You have unrealistic expectations. You stay in a relationship despite not feeling the initial intoxication. That's not meant to last anyway.
>>34140176And at the same time This can happen and you know it's time to go to find who you actually love https://boards.4chan.org/adv/thread/34136535#bottom
>>34140155>Is anyone else concerned about this? Is it normal? I feel like a mentally disabled idiot just asking this because I feel like the majority of people just inherently figure this stuff out without any help or having to embarrass yourself in order to do it right1. If you think about her all the time.2. You care about her interests.3. You want to spend the rest of your life with her.4. You have the same goals as her.(sometimes same goals/interest being co-workers/childhood friend which is even better)5. You've seen her true side (the worst and the best)6. You both handled ups and down together (she's a keeper)7. You do things together and learn new stuff together.8. You think she feels the same way about you.Look, there are times your partner change so suddenly. Health, sickness/disease, not caring despite no valid reason (valid reasons like health issues disease, work stress, family matters or basically anything beyond your control and anything done by her own volition is not a valid reason just to screw you over)You wanting the love spark/love interest you had during the first time you met her but that can't be maintained all the time. They usually call this honeymoon phase or obsession. You should try to make things spicy with her doing your kinks.It's not like she pisses you off enough to dump her being a threat to your life, the romantic life just died out but the relationship is still there. Try to recover those first and if it didn't work out, try to tell her what makes you care about her like the issues you have with her and if she can't do anything about it then that's the time you two break up as she accepts it that she can't do anything about it on her end either.If you're going to break up, be sure to get rid of anything that could ruin your life in the future that might be potentially used as blackmail.
>>34140155Cohabitation, starting with a day, then few days, then whole weeks. If the person impacts your daily life negatively and refuses to adapt or you cannot adapt to them, you should recognize it is not going to work. Think things like cleanliness, eating habits, smell of the other person, sleeping schedule etc. If a week together is something you'd repeat, then it's likely relationship material.
